It was a weird feeling he got when he woke up. The one he usually had when he was particularly happy, a fuzzy kind of warmth spreading to his heart for almost nothing. The one he had when he watched one of s.

He sat on his bed, looking at the emptiness of his room now that he had one for himself. In their past dorms, Felix would’ve greeted him with his sunshine smile as he left the room, followed by a whiny Changbin and in those moments, simple domestic life with seven other men, he couldn’t help the rush of emotions coming to attack his heart.

But here he was alone. It was a long discussion they had, because they all wanted some intimacy but separating themselves from each other wasn’t easy. They still talked and work together but so much less than before and his heart ached for those simple moments of life.

He went to the bathroom, stopping in his tracks when he found Hyunjin tying his hair happily and Chan just couldn’t help but stare until Hyunjin waved at him after catching his gaze in the mirror.

And it was at the moment he knew exactly what to do for the week. After them breaking apart their family into two places, despite being just next to each other. His first priority over everything.

Tell s how much they meant to him.

And they were not ready for it.

 

 

 

 

 

Jeongin yelled happily when he won his last race, gaze flicking to the door when he heard it open lightly and finding Chan who smiled at him. He forgot Chan had the key to their flat.

“Hey,” He said plopping next to him on the bed, “what are you doing ?”

Jeongin showed the switch, with his ranking on Mario Kart, “Playing Mario Kart.”

Chan’s gaze illuminated, “I wanna play too,” he spoke childishly, already taking off the joy-cons and placing the console on the table for both of them to see.

“I didn’t say you could,” Jeongin retorted with a playful glare but still took one of the joy-con.

Chan grinned at him, nudging his shoulder, “I’ll win this time,” he said challengingly and Jeongin cocked an eyebrow.

“Impossible for an old man like you,” he spoke back before nudging Chan’s shoulder back.

They started choosing characters and cars, before fighting to pick a race. After a few arguing they settled for one of the rainbow races.

“Yah !” Jeongin yelled as he pushed Chan a bit, “Your shoulders are too big ! Stop taking so much space !”

Chan laughed at his words, pushing him back, “I’m not ! You’re exaggerating !”

“Did you throw a shell at me ?!” Jeongin said in disbelief, staring at the older in shock.

“It’s a race Inie,” Chan replied with a laugh when he saw his face, making his character fall into the void.

At the last turn, Jeongin smiled triumphantly, reaching first while Chan came third, “Told you old man !” he looked pleasantly happy only to blink when Chan only stared at him with incredible fondness.

“You grew up so well,” he spoke quietly, gently brushing his bangs, eyes shining proudly, “you really improved a lot this year,” he complimented and Jeongin only gagged at his words despite his ears turning pink at the praising.

“I still have a lot to do,” He replied with a shrug of his shoulders. He was never good at taking compliments. But today was even worse with how Chan was being emotional and Jeongin could only try to act as usual. And failing, of course.

Chan just frowned with a pout at his words, “You’re doing great Inie, there’s no need to rush it,” he uttered softly, “what you are doing right now is completely enough even if I understand what you mean by improving more.”

Jeongin was too busy trying to refrain himself from flushing red that he was startled when Chan lifted his chin to kiss him.

A simple but intimate touch that completely relaxed him and for a brief second he forgot everything around him, kissing back slowly and focusing on the warm lips of Chan.

When the older pulled away, he blinked blearily, almost in a happy daze, cut by Chan’s sweet chuckle.

“Our Inie’s too good now,” He whined playfully, and Jeongin was at a loss for words, only letting out a snort, embarrassed more than anything. He just hoped his face wasn’t betraying him.

He almost missed how Chan’s hand was still on his cheek, thumb caressing his cheekbone gently, “I hope you know we’re all really proud of everything you’ve done so far, we’re so so proud.”

Jeongin just kept his mouth shut, knowing no matter what he said, Chan would’ve taken down his self deprecating comment. Maybe he should try to accept more of s words ?

Chan ruffled his hair roughly and Jeongin gasped dramatically, “Yah !”

Chan giggled as he stood up, “Sorry hyungnim !” bowing down dramatically and Jeongin huffed a laugh.

Maybe he should yeah.

 

 

 

 

 

Minho huffed tiredly as they finally had a pause. Their practice session had been like usual and he looked at himself in the mirror, doing one of the moves he kept struggling with. Some had started to sprawl on the floor while others went out of the room to buy snacks.

He passed his fingers through his wet hair, panting a bit before nodding at himself, putting back his cap. When he looked back at the mirror, his eyes locked with Chan.

And Chan just stared at him with a fond smile. Minho sent him a confused look, slowly trotting towards him.

He slumped dramatically next to him, the older laughing softly, “What are you looking at, old man ?”

Chan’s eyes turned into crescent shapes, a big grin on his face, “You.”

Minho snorted, leaning his back against the wall, “I could see that, something to say maybe ?”

And the older just looked at him knowingly, a gaze Minho always saw especially when he stared at the members, filled with adoration, love perhaps, “I’m really thankful.”

Minho blinked dumbly before staring at him, “About ?”

Chan looked back at their frien— brothers playing around during their pause with the same look, “I’m glad that you’re with us,” he stared back at him and Minho just paused, “I’m so glad,” and Minho knew he meant it, with how honest he sounded, looking maybe too in love.

He could only keep quiet, tips of his ears turning red whenever Chan was being sentimental.

“I know I can always count on you and without you,” he trailed softly, gaze gentle, “our family would’ve been missing an important piece. Without you, I think it really would’ve been harder for me.”

Chan always called them his family, they all did too, but the way he said it sounded so… cherished. They all joked about it, calling them mom and dad while the others were the turbulents kids. But Chan, he had gone deeply into it, acting as a father figure even if he was so young. Helping them by reassuring them, fixing different things for them or even just making sure they all were alright.

And never asking anything in return.

He felt his throat getting dry, and his face turning red, looking down at the floor and putting his cap on his head correctly to occupy him and maybe to hide his eyes.

He wasn’t someone to get easily flustered, he was actually the one flustering others and getting satisfied when he could see them panicking or blushing. He really enjoyed it. Maybe a bit too much, but the members were too cute to not tease.

But whenever Chan was sharing such honest thoughts, it had the power to just short-circuit him. It was always a simple confession but oh so strong. Filled with emotions and him looking ready to tear up was not helping either.

“I really mean it Minho-yah,” He finalized with a squeeze of his knee and his words were just a mess of love and affection that made his heart weak.

But Minho couldn’t talk, lost for words even if he tried to think of anything his flustered mind could.

He got startled when Chan raised his cap a bit, a gentle smile on display, before leaning and kissing him.

He didn’t react, his mind blank and Chan pulled away with a giggle, making sure to put back his cap correctly as if he knew how much of a mess he was.

“Chanie hyung, can you help me ?” Jeongin’s voice suddenly came.

Chan grinned, standing up, “Sure.”

Minho stared at him helping the younger, only realizing now the breath he was holding. He groaned in annoyance, rubbing his eyelids with his hands.

Chan loved them unconditionally.

I’ll make you pay Bang Chan.

He looked up at the older laughing softly at whatever Jeongin was doing and he instinctively smiled. Whenever Chan laughed like this, it always eased him. It was always easy to make him laugh and he was glad about it.

He sighed with a smile, standing up and stretching himself for the beginning of their next practice session.

 

 

 

 

 

Jisung slumped on his chair, looking up at the ceiling and humming the song he had been working on. He ignored Chan coming in and shutting the door before sitting on his chair and turning on his computer, “So, how’s your song going ?”

Jisung sat back correctly, “I think I finished it, I sent it to you.”

Chan nodded, looking through his files before letting out a noise when he found it, “Shall we play it ?”

Jisung nodded, the song starting and he glanced nervously to the older, hoping to find him bobbing his head like he used to when he listened to one of his track, but he was startled to find just a fond gaze filled with pride and love and Jisung flushed under his gaze, embarrassingly looking away.

He fidgeted his fingers, bobbing his head subtly and staring at the floor.

When he looked back up, Chan was still staring at him and he seemed to notice how shy he got because he laughed softly, rolling his chair closer to Jisung, hugging him on the side and leaning his chin on his shoulder.

“I’m so proud of you Sungie,” He murmured softly, closing his eyes content.

Jisung snorted at his words, “Aren’t you always ?”

Chan grinned, “I mean, you’re the ace, I can only be proud of you.”

Jisung dramatically pushed some bangs, looking like he knew even if deep down, he was in a bit of a panicked state, “Right, I’m so great at everything I do.”

The older laughed softly as the song slowly finished and he slowly pulled away, “You are, you completely are,” and Jisung just blinked, not really prepared to hear that.

“It always surprises me at how good you are at everything you do, I feel like there’s even more that you’re hiding,” He continued, rolling his chair back to his computer, “even your flaws are your qualities.”

Jisung felt his face getting even redder, looking at Chan to see any ounce of sarcasm but there was none.

And he swallowed the sudden feather-like feeling, laughing a bit, “What are you saying hyung ?” He whined, looking back at the ceiling, to avoid his warm gaze.

“I’m not joking,” And the way his tone was serious completely threw him off guard, looking back at him to see a firm but loving gaze, “there’s no way for me to even joke about this, because it’s true,” he came closer of him with his usual gaze, “Jisungie, you’re a great artist, and I’m actually your first fan,” he added with a giggle.

Jisung took a sharp breath when Chan leaned to connect their lips, one hand pressed against his thigh and the other cradling his cheek.

The younger groaned weakly when Chan bit on his lower lip, before he slowly moved his lips with as much care as he usually did, making sure to let him lead the kiss if he ever wanted to. And Jisung felt overwhelmed by how much he was loved. By how much Chan adored him and the others.

Chan had been someone he admired even if he never said it aloud. Too much pride to say such cheesy comments but here was the older, literally blurting his love to him.

He already knew about it, but hearing it still did the trick.

Chan pulled away with a worried frown, eyes wide open when he saw the few tears running on his cheeks, “Oh Sungie, why are you crying ?” He slowly wiped away the tears with his thumbs, “I’m sorry,” he apologized with a pout.

Jisung pushed his hands away, pressing his palms on his eyes and feeling embarrassed, why did he have to be so honest and caring ? “You’re annoying hyung,” he whined, making Chan chuckle.

“For telling the truth ?” He asked in fake offence earning a snort from the younger and easing his heart.

“Just warn me next time you confess your undying love to me,” He mumbled with a sniffle.

Chan smiled, “I’ll try to.”

 

 

 

 

 

Seungmin took a sip of his water bottle, after singing for so long. He looked at the time, almost four in the morning and decided to stop for today. He took out his phone, texting to Chan who he knew he was still in his studio to walk home together.

Seungmin had just the time to arrive at the front door when someone jumped on his back making him yelp at the sudden attack. He glared at Chan who blinked innocently, hugging him happily.

Seungmin rolled his eyes annoyingly and yet a smile couldn’t help but take his lips. “Did I keep you waiting ?”

Seungmin shook his head, “No, I just came a minute ago.”

Chan hummed, pulling on Seungmin’s hand to leave the building and almost dragging the younger.

Seungmin took a long breath, exhaling slowly, the fresh smell of outside at his hour relaxing him. He did well today, he thought.

“How’s your song ?” He asked the older as they walked down the street, Chan’s hand holding his to maybe keep him warm. Or just because he wanted to.

“It’s good, it’s good,” He replied with a satisfied smile, squeezing his hand with his dimple smile.

Seungmin smiled back instinctively.

“And what about you ?”

Seungmin shrugged his shoulders, looking at the streetlamps illuminating their paths with an orange like hue, “Good, I need to practice more though.”

Chan hummed slowly, but he still sounded defeated for some reason. Seungmin got startled when Chan stopped him from resuming walking and he looked at him in confusion.

“I know you only want to improve more and more,” he trailed, taking both of his hands and tilting his head to the side lightly, “but don’t forget to rest, okay ?” his voice was small and soft and Seungmin couldn’t help but think how much of a hypocrite he could be sometimes. Actually not sometimes.

He was ready to retort only to get taken off guard when Chan cupped his face, fingers pressing against the shells of his ears. And just like that, his voice disappeared.

“You’re already doing amazing, you know ? Your voice’s so strong and stable whenever you sing,” He started, not noticing how warm Seungmin’s face got, lips slightly pursued, “you’re already a professional and you’re already taking over the k-pop industry,” he finished with a chuckle when he found Seungmin making a face a bit too cute.

Seungmin just huffed, trying to find back the words which had run away at the touch in panic. But he didn’t have the time, Chan leaned closer and kissed him gently and Seungmin completely gave up on his words.

He felt warm which was weird because they were in the middle of the streets, in the cold with possibly fans and paparazzis seeing them kiss.

And yet he didn’t do anything to make it stop. He kissed back instead, missing the warmth when Chan broke their kiss first.

“Why are you so adorable Seungminie ?” He dared ask with heart eyes and Seungmin scoffed, looking at the streets and hoping to stop his heart from beating like that.

“Let’s go,” he managed to say without stuttering, pulling on his hand and making the older giggle.

“Aw Seungminie, I wish I could kiss you all night,” He teased and Seungmin swallowed his growing anticipation.

He wasn’t surprised when at home Chan followed him to his flat and didn’t give him a second to himself, kissing him more. Seungmin could only hum happily.

But god was Chan going to regret it.

 

 

 

 

 

Changbin looked one time at his phone, making sure he wasn’t ruining the recipe. Today he was going to prove to everyone he wasn’t such a disaster in the kitchen. The others were busy doing who knew what and he took the chance to start cooking, black apron on him and maybe insecurity dripping from his being.

That was okay, he could do it.

He was so immersed in it that he jolted up when he felt arms wrapped around his waist and a giggle left the person’s mouth.

“You’re cooking ?”

Changbin nodded, focusing on his omelet and feeling Chan pressed his chin on his shoulder.

“Why so suddenly ?” He asked, looking actually hungry.

“I’m gonna prove to you how great of a cook I am !” Changbin replied with a childish voice, making Chan laugh.

“You don’t have to prove yourself Changbinie,” He murmured softly, still staring at him trying to flip the omelet in complete vain, frustration starting to twist his expression.

Chan slowly pulled away, hand leaning on the counter and Changbin let out a noise of happiness when he finally managed to flip it not so gracefully.

He looked back at Chan proudly only to find him already staring with a doting gaze, proud smile on his face.

“You’re maybe not that good at cooking but you have so many more qualities,” He told him, turning off the hot plate before the omelet could burn, Changbin took the pan before turning it to drop the omelet in a plate, “you’re a great dancer, a great rapper and singer and a great producer.”

Changbin puckered his lips, tips of his ears turning red. He hadn’t expected the oldest to start complimenting him like that. He usually didn’t say such things, something rare he would admit when the moment needed him to. But now there wasn’t any reason for him to say that.

Changbin meant to say something cheesy in return or act like a child but he couldn’t. His words were maybe too honest for him to joke about, only staring at his omelet completely flustered at what to say back.

Chan made him sit on one of the kitchen’s chairs and gave him a pair of chopsticks, before pressing his hands on his shoulders, “You’re great at what you’re doing, and I’m really proud of you, we all are.”

Changbin just nodded slowly, hoping he would just stop because his heart was not ready to hear that early in the morning. But Chan raised his chin slowly, taking the chance to press their lips together.

Now that he thought about it, he had been kissing the youngers more than the two olders. He didn’t remember the last time he kissed Chan or even Minho, but again Minho wasn’t one to kiss a lot, while Chan, on the other hand, enjoyed it too much.

He made a mental note to do it more often.

Chan pulled away first, Changbin feeling a bit in a daze and he stared at him completely pleased. Chan laughed a bit before patting his shoulder, “You should eat, before it’s cold.”

And Changbin just stared at Chan’s back leaving the dorm, listening to the familiar click of the door.

He rubbed the nape of his neck, staring at his perfectly cooked omelet before chewing on his lower lip and tapping his foot on the floor at a regular pace.

How could he be a mess this easily ?

He groaned before pressing his forehead on the table, hoping the cool surface would stop the warmness spreading on his face.

He would get it back to him, he just needed to find how.

 

 

 

 

 

Felix giggled as he ran on the sand, feet bare and completely happy to have a day off. He was glad to go to the beach with Chan and hoped to spend the time with only glee and laughter.

“You come Chris ?” He asked and the older laughed, running after him.

They had spent their day together, just playing in some arcade place, eating together and now finishing the day at the beach, the sun slowly setting in the horizon, only half of it poking out.

“Last one in the water will buy tonight’s food !” Chan yelled with a laugh before they started to race, trying to stop the other like they could and finishing by both falling into the water with laughter.

“You lost !” Felix yelled, his accent easing the older and splashing him with water.

Chan yelped before chasing after him, Felix screeched as he tried running away but was stopped by the older’s arms. “Alright, alright, tell me what you want to eat tonight.”

Felix hummed with a mischievous glint in his eyes before grinning, “Good old burgers mate !”

Chan snorted before splashing him with water, Felix screeching with a snicker, “Fine mate !”

They laughed loud and cheerful, letting themselves be hit by the waves. Felix was spending such a great day, playing around and laughing, his cheeks hurting from how much fun he was having. Chan looked the same, both playfully splashing the other.

They both slowly walked back on the sand, warm under their feet with light hearts. There were only a few people on the beach and Felix was even more glad about it. He sat on the sand, looking where the sea and the sky touch, Chan plopping next to him. Felix snuggled against him making them both lay on the sand, Chan caressing his head tenderly while the younger giggled in delight.

He sighed contentedly, staring at the sky, hand around the older’s waist.

“You know,” Chan trailed with an eased smile, “everytime I’m with you, spending a day like that,” he continued, Felix looking at him, “I really just feel like at home,” Chan locked eyes with him and Felix hummed before grinning.

“Just like back in Australia,” He added, caressing the younger’s cheek tenderly, gaze loving and giggling a bit when he saw how red his ears got, “it— I really don’t know how I would’ve survived without you.”

Felix just flushed more, hugging the older and hiding his face against his shoulder making Chan laugh softly, “You’ve really been someone I need— you’re just my soulmate,” he finalized with a smile, sweet adoration glimmering in his gaze, “you’re just a part of me, a part that if it were gone missing I wouldn’t have the strength to continue all this.”

Felix couldn’t get even redder, just wanting to bury himself in the sand. He knew how to take compliments, especially from Chan but today, just having him open up his heart this easily, telling him how much he meant to him, had managed to knot his tongue. His heart could melt right here and then from how much Chan made him feel warm and loved. He could only hug the older to pass his message, too shy to even glance up at him.

Chan laughed even more, before shifting a bit his position, and gently raised his face, Felix puckering his lips when they locked eyes. Chan grinned and slowly leaned, pressing his lips against his.

He knew they shouldn’t do something like this in a public place, if someone saw them it could shatter their group. But god, he didn’t care. He just closed his eyes, enjoying the moment, the love Chan kept wrapping his heart with, moving his lips in harmony with his and losing himself a bit.

Chan pulled away, a bit breathless but with a fond and affectionate gaze before he smiled.

Felix could only stare, trying to breath back at a regular pace and then giggling, the older soon joining.

What a great day.

 

 

 

 

 

Hyunjin hummed happily as he put down his brush, looking at his art work with a slight frown.

Something was definitely missing. But he couldn’t pinpoint what exactly.

He tilted his head to the side, trying to look at it through a different point of view and even moving around the room to look from afar. But nothing came to him.

He pouted before he heard someone knocking on the door and Chan’s head came out of the small interstice, “Hey ? How’re you doing ?”

Hyunjin grinned, “I’m good, just, I think something’s off with my drawing,” before he narrowed his eyes thinking it would help him find it easier.

Chan looked at his canvas, putting his hands on his shoulders and humming. Hyunjin waited for him and Chan let out a confused noise, “I think it’s perfect like that.”

Hyunjin quickly disagreed, “Nah, something’s definitely missing,” he whined, taking one of his stained brushes before gently dipping it in the purple color before adding a few notes of the color on his canvas, grimacing slightly.

“I could stare at you working all day,” Chan blurted out and Hyunjin’s face flushed in a second, “you’re such an incredible artist,” he sounded genuinely amazed and Hyunjin just shivered at the praise.

Chan laughed at his flustered expression, brushing his red ear teasingly, “I’m not even joking, you can literally, sing, dance, rap, write and draw ! This is just incredible,” he added with a nod before remembering, “and you’re great at taking photos too !” he gasped dramatically, “Hyunjinie stop being good at everything,” he whined as he hugged him from behind.

Hyunjin shook his head to disagree, struggling against him, “I’m not, I’m not,” he retorted, dramatically yelping when they fell off the stool.

But Chan had made sure he didn’t hurt himself, hand wrapped around his waist before Hyunjin huffed tiredly as he laid down, Chan on top of him looking at him with love.

Hyunjin flushed more when his hand came to caress his cheek, “You are,” he whispered, voice dripping with honesty, before he dove and brought their lips together.

Hyunjin gasped, kissing back weakly with how overwhelmed he was. He gripped the front of his shirt to deepen the kiss and could feel the small smile taking the older’s face.

Gosh, he’s so desperate for more.

Chan pulled away slowly, lips puffy and red and gaze glinting with even more love if possible and Hyunjin flushed brighter than before. He slapped Chan’s chest who whined at the pain, “What was that for ?”

“Don’t kiss me out of the blue, I need time to get mentally prepared !” He replied earning a big dimpled grin from the culprit.

“Sorry Hyunjinie.”

Hyunjin huffed before Chan laid next to him with a happy sigh, arm thrown on his waist and he gazed back at his canvas with new eyes, knowing exactly what he needed to add.

Hyunjin pushed him away, Chan puckered his lips in disappointment. “You better be ready hyung,” he spoke with determination but looking more shy than anything as he sat back on the stool.

Chan watched him take a brush before resuming working, he couldn't help but his eyebrow, “Ready for ?”

Hyunjin glanced at him with a smile, “You’ll see soon.”

And Chan never felt more dreadful than now.

 

 

 

 

 

It was barely eight in the afternoon when everyone gathered in Chan, Changbin, Hyunjin and Jisung’s flat. Chan wasn’t home yet, wanting to finish a song he was working on. He had told them he would come later. And this was the perfect moment for all of them to talk together.

Jisung leaned on his hands, sitting on the floor, “So, is it me or did Chan hyung get super cheesy this week ?”

Minho hummed and Hyunjin gasped with wide eyes, “Wait, I thought he only did it to me !”

Felix puckered his lips, “He was really cheesy, he told me how much I meant to him… and all,” his voice slowly decreased when everyone stared at him and he couldn’t help but flush a bit.

Seungmin snickered, “I think he did that to everyone then,” Jeongin gagged just thinking about it.

Changbin crossed his arms with an exaggerated frown, “This is such an affront,” Hyunjin laughed at his face while Minho smirked.

“Good, then I’m guessing everyone’s on the same page ?” He asked with a devilish smile and all the others instantly nodded with matching gaze.

Jeongin rubbed his hands together like a villain, “He’s so not ready.”

 

 

 

Chan sighed happily as he entered his flat, started to find everyone in the living-room watching a movie, “Hey,” he greeted as he took off his shoes earning a string of greetings back.

“You’re home early,” Seungmin said in confusion and Chan grinned.

He took off his jacket and beanie, hand passing messily through his hair, “I’m satisfied today.”

Minho stared at him, “Did you eat ?”

Chan nodded with a thumbs up, “Yep !” before leaving to take a quick shower.

The others all shared a glance before deciding to start their plan sooner.

 

 

 

When Chan came out of the bathroom, the movie had finished and he huffed in disappointment because he knew they all would go back to their respective rooms and flats.

At least he had managed to cherish every one of them for the week and maybe he should stop trying to be too sentimental when they were living next to each other.

“Hyung ? Can you come sit ?” Felix asked softly, patting the floor next to him with a smile.

Chan frowned suspiciously when he found all of them gazing at him in a certain way. He still hummed, sitting next to Felix who didn’t take a second to hug him, pressing his cheek on his shoulder and making Chan snort fondly.

“We kind of need to talk,” Jisung spoke with a cute frown, arms crossed menacingly.

Chan found him even more cute. “About ?”

“You’ve been acting… really cheesy hyung,” Changbin muttered with a knowing smile.

“And we just wanted to know why— why suddenly ?” Jisung asked with his cheeks burning, embarrassed.

Chan smiled sheepishly, patting Felix’s head, “I just wanted to make sure... you— you all knew that,” he smiled softly, “since I rarely say it—”

“Hyung, we know,” Jisung cut him, looking a bit flustered, like the rest of them but with a tiny bit of love too, “we’ve always known.”

“You don't have to say it, you always look at us in that way anyway,” Seungmin added with red ears, looking around nonchalantly.

“Like, we're your whole world— your whole galaxy,” Hyunjin mumbled with a roll of his eyes, cringing of his own words and having shivers run down his spine.

Chan blushed before laughing shyly, “Am I that obvious ?”

Minho huffed teasingly, “Completely obvious.”

“And I kind of— we kind of feel bad,”  Jeongin spoke, looking down at the floor with a pout.

Chan frowned in confusion, “Why would you feel bad ?”

“Because we're not... saying it back, we're not really saying how much you mean to us,” He replied, glancing at him before putting his cap deeper on his head.

Chan was startled, looking at them one by one and finding guilty gazes, “Wait, don't feel bad, I know what you feel,” he smiled, ruffling Jeongin's hair tenderly, “and I know you're all not that great with words, you're way better with your actions.”

They stayed silent, not really looking better and Chan just snorted. He grinned fondly, “Who's making sure that I'm eating ?”

Changbin glanced at him, ears red, “Me,” Hyunjin raised his hand silently, looking too serious for this situation.

“Who's always asking me if I'm alright when I look down ?”

Minho rubbed the nape of his neck, but didn't answer, just hiding his face and Chan laughed softly while Seungmin just cleared his throat, “Me too.”

“Who's giving me hugs whenever I need some ?”

Felix raised his hand happily before hugging the older tighter who just wrapped his arms safely around him, sighing contentedly.

“Who's always trying to cheer me up with games or trying to make me laugh ?”

Jeongin looked down while Jisung hummed slowly. Both of their ears turned pink at the words, embarrassed and Chan smiled.

“Who's making sure that I'm coming back from my studio ?”

“We all do,” Hyunjin said, slowly nodding.

“And I’m grateful, so so grateful for everything you do for me,” He continued, gaze locking with each one of them, “I don’t need words to know, I just need you all.”

“You’re so cheesy that’s infuriating,” Seungmin mumbled with a frown, the others laughing while Chan just smiled exasperatedly.

“Well, you signed up for this, you better bear it now,” Chan teased back, taking a hold of his arms to hug him with Felix and Seungmin sighed in defeat.

“Well, good because you’ll have to bear us too,” Minho spoke with a smirk, Chan looking up to him in confusion.

“What do you mean ?”

“You’ve been too dangerous these days, we need to strike back.”

Chan could already feel himself pale, trying to leave only to be wrestled down by Seungmin and Felix, clutching at him tightly with a devious puppy smile, “It’s too late for you hyung, accept your faith,” he had clearly been spending too much time with Minho.

The older squealed as he could see the others slowly surrounding him and he screeched when Jeongin slumped on top of him, “No ! Let me go !”

“There’s no point in fighting back hyung,” Changbin spoke with a smirk, hugging the older from behind and trying to stop him from moving too much.

“Wait wait wait, this isn’t fair—” he instinctively moved his face to one side when he saw Hyunjin leaning closer and he regretted when he felt his lips pressed in the crook of his neck, biting down a groan when his lips trailed kisses to his cheek.

 

“Okay everyone ! It’s cheesy time !” Changbin spoke loudly and Chan wanted to disappear.

 

And Hyunjin cupped his face, Chan opening one eye shyly, “I think you’re someone who’s really reliable, you’ve always helped me when I struggled and cheered me up. I’m glad for a lot of things but I’ll just say one thing,” he trailed, Chan’s ears were already red, and Hyunjin smirked, “I love you,” before leaning and kissing the older delicately.

Ignoring the cheers and coos from the others, Chan knew how it would finish for him, completely dead from compliments, since he couldn’t take any. But right now he could only think of Hyunjin’s lips, soft and his mind completely turned off.

Hyunjin pulled away slowly, his lips and realizing, “Hyung tastes like sweets,” the others seemed to be even more hyped up after hearing this and Chan hid his face in his hands but Changbin quickly stopped him from doing it earning a whine from him.

“I can’t take more, please stop the torture,” he cried fakely earning a few snorts.

Changbin grinned, “And that’s only the beginning hyung !”

Jeongin came next, sitting on the older’s lap with an innocent smile, “There’s a lot of things I’m thankful about,” he trailed softly, “you’ve been someone I looked up to and when I see how hard you’re trying to be a good leader, it made me think how I wanted to be like you,” he stared at the older who looked a bit uncomfortable at his words but not in a bad way, and the others made noises of agreements making Jeongin laugh shyly, “I just— you know I’m not good at saying this kind of thing but I’ll do it just this time,” they screamed happily and Chan blushed even more if possible, “I love you hyung,” he leaned, gently kissing him.

Chan’s heart would not be able to take five other comments, his mind starting to panic at the sudden overwhelming love they decided to torture him with.

They parted away, a bit breathless and Jeongin looked satisfied when Chan couldn’t even speak a word, too flustered. He moved away, leaving his place to Jisung.

Jisung grinned at him not so innocently and Chan got worried. Jisung could be unpredictable at times. “Hi hyungie,” he said softly and the others snorted while Chan just pressed himself more against Changbin as if trying to escape him, “You know, we joked a lot about how broad your shoulders are with your responsibilities as the leader,” he trailed, smile turning genuine and Chan huffed a laugh, “and I’ve always wanted to help you carry it, you really have a sense of responsibility that makes me wonder how you can do that.” And Chan hadn’t the strength to retort humbly because Jisung looked at him with admiration and affection and his words got stuck in his throat. “And, I know you don’t think you’re a good leader, but for us you’re perfect.”

Jisung made a face, shivering at his words and breaking the warm mood, the others laughing, “I love you,” he blurted out embarrassingly before pecking his lips.

Chan stared at him, eyes starting to burn a bit, pulling away and he gasped when his lips moved to his jaw, he should’ve known— “Sungie,” he whined, shutting his eyes at the sensation. Jisung pulled away with a soft laugh before winking at him and moving away.

The leader just groaned when this time Minho sat on his lap with a devilish smirk, how could he take another hit when he was already down ? But his thoughts got cut when Minho lifted his chin to kiss him. He hummed in surprise, unable to do anything but follow his lead. His movements were a bit rough and Chan almost lost his mind there, groaning aloud when Minho pressed one of his hands on his hip, squeezing a bit.

He pulled away with a completely satisfied smirk, Chan’s lips were starting to get red, “You’re a great leader Chan-ah,” the others laughed at his words but Chan couldn’t with how dazed he was, eyes sending hearts, “but more seriously, I’m thankful that you’re working so hard for us, always making sure that everyone’s comfortable or happy before thinking of you,” he mumbled, “I’m really glad you chose me that day,” his gaze softened and Chan’s eyes turned glassy, he knew the younger meant so much more despite speaking so little, thank you for trusting me, for giving me this family and for always believing in me, “I’m glad to say you’re my leader, none of us would’ve found better.” I’m glad I know you, I’m so proud of you.

Chan’s lower lip wobbled a bit at his words, heart slaughtered by every word in the most gentle way.

He had expected Minho to leave his place but the younger smiled happily, “Love you hyung,” before pecking his lips gently and laughing softly when he pulled away and found Chan just ready to burst out crying, the others cooing.

Minho wasn’t one to speak those words, so Chan ready to cry with all those praises he received could be the cherry on top.

“Don’t cry hyung, it’s not finished yet,” Changbin teased and Chan knew they would kill him. But again he didn’t mind dying in that way.

Minho moved away and Seungmin sat on his lap with a pensive look before he nodded at himself, “We all know you’re insecure about yourself,” he started and Chan started flushing in embarrassment, knowing the topic was kind of sensitive for him, “and we know you’re not good at taking care of yourself too,” he added with a small sympathetic smile, because they all knew the struggles, “but we’re there, and we’ll keep being by your side, we’ll keep showing you how great of a person you are even if you don’t think you deserve it,” Chan looked away to the floor, eyes feeling hot and he blinked quickly to make the tears disappear, “you’re an incredible artist hyung, you’re so talented and I hope one day you’ll let us take care of you the way you take care of us.”

Chan sniffled a bit when Seungmin cupped his face to raise it with the most tender smile he ever saw, “I love you hyung,” he whispered before kissing him and Chan let himself go, just giving up on his fight.

He couldn’t win against their love.

Seungmin pulled away with his puppy smile and Chan melted again, not having even noticed Jisung and Hyunjin taking pictures or Felix and Changbin exchanging a look. He got startled when Changbin detached himself from his back to face him.

Changbin grinned, sitting on top of his lap and Chan’s hands finished on his hips, “During all those years, I think we fought the most,” he started, making Chan grimace playfully the others snorting at the sudden topic, “but you told me the most about your struggles and I’m really happy you trust me and lean on me,” he added, voice softer and Chan’s smile a bit, “and the fact you let me help you is a start, you know ? You’ll get better at taking care of yourself and we’ll gladly help,” Chan looked away shyly, “I already said it before but I’m grateful you always sacrifice everything for our sake, you always try to bear everything, I’m just thankful that you exist.”

Chan knew he would not be able to take more, especially when Changbin caressed his cheek gently, “Love you Chan hyung,” he muttered before leaning to press their lips together, slow and careful.

 

Chan was seriously dying tonight.

 

Changbin pulled away with a satisfied smirk and Felix came soon after, cradling his lap happily, eyes already shining with tears, “Hey Chris,” he couldn’t help but say, the others chuckling and snorting softly.

“Hey Lix,” He replied, after finding a stable tone.

Felix smiled, “You’ve always been someone I looked up to, just the fact you’re working so hard for us, always making sure we’re okay,” he trailed with a bit of struggle, “I just don’t know what I would be doing without you, I really think I would’ve given up on being an idol,” he said softly and Chan bit the inside of his cheek, “you’re guiding us through this journey that is StrayKids and I’m so thankful for that,” they both didn’t notice when he switched to English, “and I know you used to struggle when you were a trainee especially when you were homesick and the fact you helped me so much to make sure I wouldn’t go through that,” he bit his lower lip when the tears started filling his eyes and he smiled shakily, “when you told me you’ll never leave me behind, just know that it works for you too, we’ll never leave you.”

Chan couldn’t fight the tears rolling on his cheeks, looking at Felix wiping his eyes quickly, “I love you Chris,” he finished before kissing him despite the salty tears.

 

Home, they were his home.

 

“Oh gosh,” Chan couldn’t help but utter when Felix pulled away, making them laugh, adoration dripping from their gazes along with tears for some of them. Felix slowly backed off a bit with the biggest sunshine smile, “you’re all mean,” he whined, wiping the constant tears falling.

“And you love us for that,” Jisung added with a wink, the others agreeing and Chan couldn’t even say the opposite, smiling like he was the happiest man in the world surrounded by his family.

 

“Yeah, I love you, I really do.”

 

~~~

Happy New Year !!! :D Hope you all stay healthy and be happier than last year !
Got any resolution ? I don't really have one this year, I just hope to stay healthy and all !

I didn't really proof read the story, so I apologize if there was a lot mistakes ! ><

Love you all ! <3
And thank you for reading this story ! :3