Devastated – that's how Donghae felt for the last six months.

Everyone kept saying time will heal his broken heart, but to be honest? It was only getting worse. Donghae could barely sleep. Every time he closed his tired eyes, the only thing he saw was his daughter, taking her one last breath. The lack of sleep wasn't helping him either, it only caused more problems. The young author was getting weaker and weaker everyday – he lost so much weight, he could barely recognize himself in the mirror lately. Also the book he was supposed to finish months ago, got deleted out of frustration. Nothing made sense to him anymore, and there was literally nothing that could bring a smile on his face.

Donghae was broken and the only person that could fix it and put him back together didn't even acknowledge his presence anymore.

It all started a little more than a six months ago. Lee Haru – their beloved daughter they adopted three years ago, right after she was born – started to feel unwell. The symptoms didn’t seem like something more serious than a flu, but after a week of struggling they decided to get more professional help. But life is so unfair, right? Unfair to the point, when innocent kids have to suffer because of their parents mistakes. That’s exactly what happened with Haru. Her biological mother wasn’t a saint and did not took a proper care of herself, while being pregnant. Drinking? Smoking? She did all of that and more. The doctors reacted immediately, saying it’s a miracle that their baby girl lived happily for the past three years, without any complications and they placed her in a hospital.

A month – that’s how long she fought, but lose the battle for her own life.

Haru was a strong girl, but still too fragile to win with such an awful sickness. Her lungs lost all the oxygen and it was hard for her to breathe even with a help of a machine. Donghae remembers the exact moment the doctors stopped all the machines and she took her last breath, while looking him in the eyes. He remember holding her tiny body and crying so hard he couldn’t even catch a breathe of his own. He was crying so hard, his whole body was shaking. Donghae didn’t wanted to say goodbye, he wasn’t ready. Haru was his happiness, she was everything to him and she was gone just like that. It took an hour to calm him down and get him off the cold hospital’s room floor. It was awful, he felt broken, he felt like his life has no meaning anymore. Until he felt his husband's embrace on his weak body.

Donghae didn’t remember anything about the funeral. All he knew is that Hyukjae – said husband – took care of everything. He didn’t remember anything about the whole month after Haru’s death. All he was aware of is that somehow he ended up in a cemetery everyday and Hyuk was always there to bring his freezing self back home. They didn’t talk too much. The older one only made sure Donghae was okay and wished him goodnight, while being in bed after warming him up. The young author doesn’t even remember how his husband bared with that awful tragedy – he just realized they started to fall apart right after Haru fell sick.

Hyukjae changed, he changed a lot and Donghae couldn’t recognize his own husband in him anymore. At first he thought maybe it’s his own fault? Maybe he was just giving him space, that it seemed Donghae needed? But after a month the situation was still the same, if not worse. While Haru was in hospital he was distant, but Donghae understood that, what he couldn’t understand was how they stopped talking to each other right after she was gone to a better place. Hyukjae was never home, all he did was work and work. After coming back home he ate the dinner Hae prepared for him and went to sleep, only to get up early in the morning and leave for work again. Sometimes he asked about something he was looking for or wished his husband a good day, but that was it. They ate together in the weekends, but spent time in different rooms in their huge house.

It took only six months for them to become complete strangers and that terrified Donghae.

The young author tried to get better, he really did. He even started looking for professional help for himself, cause maybe he was the problem? He needed, no – he wanted to get better, to heal and save his marriage. He even found a perfect therapist for both of them and for the last week built a courage to talk about it with Hyukjae while having dinner on Sunday. But the day has come and the businessman left their home in the morning, without any explanation only to text his worried husband he won't be back for dinner today. Of course Donghae asked him if something happened, but he didn't get a single reply.

After that day their situation was even worse. Hyuk was coming back home later that usual and never touched the food Hae prepared for him. After showering he would close himself in his home office and spend the rest of the evening there. He even stopped sleeping in the bedroom they shared for ten years, choosing the small sofa he had in his office. The first night Donghae got really worried and went downstairs to check on him. Hyukjae liked to overwork himself sometimes and he just had to make sure his husband is okay. He knocked on the door, but entered without waiting for a permission. Surprisingly the lights were off, only the small lamp on his desk was on, but no sign of his husband. He looked to his right and found him laying there and shivering under a oversize hoodie, that was used as a blanket. Donghae's heart clenched at the sight and he quickly went to the living room and brought a real one, covering Hyukjae's body. But exactly the same situation happened on the next day, a day after and on the third night, when Hae came downstairs, he found his husband sleeping peacefully on his office sofa with a pillow and a duvet he must have stole from the guest room.

That's when Donghae realized - Hyukjae was simply avoiding him.

Now, what can you assume in such a situation? Poor man did not sleep all night, trying to hold back tears and make all the bad thoughts go away. Hyukjae wouldn't cheat on him, right? He would never do that, but why was he coming back home later lately? Why he always went straight to take a shower and stopped eating the food his husband prepared for him? Why would he stop sleeping in the same bed with him? Why, just why? Donghae had so many questions, yet there was no one who could answer them for him. The young author got insecure, for the first time in his life he doubted his husband love and loyalty for him. But he didn't say anything, he just kept watching him.

Next Sunday came and Hyuk - once again - left for a whole day. Donghae tried his best not to panic, yet he ended up crying himself to sleep that night, not feeling anyone's presence next to him. Maybe he was naive, maybe his heart was too pure, maybe he believed in his husband so much, but for the next week he kept trying to get his attention. He would wake up earlier only to make Hyukjae breakfast, that he could eat on the way to work. He would buy lunch, that was delivered to his office in the exact moment his break was starting. He even tried to have a small talk, once he was back home but the older one wasn't having it at all. Donghae knew it wasn't working at all and finally - all that fear and sadness he had in him turned into anger.

It was another Sunday. Surprisingly Hyuk was still at home once Donghae woke up, which made his heart beat a little bit faster. He quickly got himself ready and went downstairs, where his husband was watching the TV in the living room. "Good morning" the young author greeted him, but only heard a acknowledging hum in the response. "What do you wanna eat for breakfast? Maybe something sweet? I didn't have.."

"Already ate" Hyukjae cut him off harshly.

"No you didn't" he said in a small voice. "I can see there's nothing gone from th