It’s a misty Sunday night.

 

It has been raining the whole day and Mina might cry for real if the rain still continued that night, no matter how she loves the sound of it and how it comforts her most of the times. Well, that particular day, the rain does not, in any way, comforted Mina.

 

The rain just reminded her how miserable she is, how lonely and alone she is starting that week, how hurt and empty she is ever since the love of her life said those freaking painful words to her without having any second thoughts.

 

The last time she checked, they were still happy with each other. She is holding her waist using her hand and holding her hand using her other free hand and the other girl is doing the same thing to her.

 

She surely cannot breathe with what just happened. In just a snap, her whole life feels like just a lie. She totally did not expect things to turn out that way, but she doesn’t have any choice, but to just accept because it’s already done and she cannot turn back time.

 

Right after that moment happened, she immediately deleted all the photos in her phone that will be reminded her of her—everything about her. She walked away in her life as if it’s just okay for her to feel that way when it’s totally the opposite, which she just pushed herself to walk away and delete those photos even if she’s already hurting inside.

 

It was a long day and Mina was so tired. She is emotionally tired and she feels like she will become numb any moment now.

 

Ever since she was a kid, she thought of love as similar to happiness and comfort and warmth and nice and soft things, but she didn’t know that it can also turn into regrets and broken promises and some kind of pain she cannot even explain, that she just want to jump off a cliff kind of pain.

 

Mina took a deep breath.

 

Whenever she comes back to that particular moment the first time they hold each other firmly when their friends wanted to take a photo of them, she just keeps on thinking that there’s something in the way they hold one another’s hand and waist, as if they are figuratively saying that they never have plans on letting each other go. And Mina, bless her soul, just keep on holding onto that unsaid promise.

 

“So is there already a label between the two of us after all those sweet and lovely moments we had that is definitely and literally far away from the way we treat our friends?”

 

Mina bravely asked Chaeyoung, her special and favorite person, that night when they decided to stay at the same hotel room while they are having a vacation with their friends at the beach.

 

The younger was too shy to look at her directly in the eyes and Mina personally thinks it’s cute because there’s obviously a sweet smile hiding in the girl’s lips and her cheeks are blushing too hard.

 

“Chae, I’m serious. Ever since our friends introduced me to you, I immediately thought that there’s something different and special I felt the moment our eyes met and the way you softly introduced yourself and shook hands with me. Goddamn, I just knew that—“

 

“You’re the one”

 

They said at the same time as Chaeyoung close the gap between the both of them and gently put her right hand on Mina’s left cheek and her other hand on Mina’s own.

 

“Mina, it would be nice if I could kiss you at the moment, now that I’m already sure that my feelings are reciprocated, that I never knew will happen be—“

 

Just like all those cliché moments during confession between two persons who are having mixed emotions, Mina didn’t let Chaeyoung finish her sentence because she just straightforwardly put her lips on Chaeyoung’s own and oh, how sweet, nice, warm, delicate, enchanting that moment was because they feel like their hearts can jump in joy and explode already because of the love they have for each other and the emotion they were currently feeling back then.

 

It was followed by another peck with a smile on their faces and they lay down on their bed as Mina immediately found her own home and comfort in Chaeyoung’s arms.

 

And that’s when their lovely and happy moments as a couple started.

 

At most times, they just keep on throwing each other some cheesy lines whenever they like to because they like to see the other one cringe and the other high over the moon because of that certain line.

 

It started with Mina and her overflowing love for Chaeyoung that she just wants to stay by her side if it’s possible because she doesn’t want to part ways with her.

 

“Do you want some surprise?”

 

“Eh? Surprise, but you’re already saying it to me?”

 

“Yes or no?”

 

“Yes, of course.”

 

“Chaeyoung”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“I’d give you my heart, but I can’t give you something you already have.”

 

The older casually said with sparks in her eyes and giving Chaeyoung some finger hearts and the latter surely cringed with what the other has said, but she had to admit that it made her heart flutter.

 

“Please, it’s too early for some pickup lines, Mina.”

 

“I saw you just smiled widely. Don’t deny it, Chaeng”

 

“Fine. I have your heart as you have mine.”

 

And of course, it was followed by Chaeyoung, even if she thinks she just want to puke right after she said that kind of line to Mina that surely made the latter giggle.

 

“Mina, I think you dropped something”

 

“No? I’m holding my phone and wallet, firmly”

 

They were walking on the streets to buy some ice cream from the convenience store and Chaeyoung tried so hard not to flinch at her own pickup line.

 

“I’m certain about it. You just dropped love into my heart and that’s all I needed”

 

“Oh. Son Chaeyoung finally saying some pickup lines? I like it. 1000 out of 100. Love you!”

 

That’s how casual and straightforward Mina is, that is so unusual about her, that is why Chaeyoung is still adjusting to that side of Mina because she surely feel like she cannot breathe whenever Mina say those kind of things without any warning.

 

When night comes, random and deep conversations are open to them whenever they decide to sleep to either of their respective apartments.

 

“Chaeyoung, I want you to know that I love you more than anything in this world”

 

She said with such serious tone that is evident with the way her eyes sparkle with the twinkling stars in the night sky and the way she hold Chaeyoung’s hand as if it’s the missing puzzle piece she need in her life.

 

It’s cliché and already boring for others, but at moments like that, their hands just immediately find their way to each other like how they literally found one another in this life.

 

“I’m so lucky to have you, Mina. I don’t even know how I deserve all the love you have for me, but I will always love you the way you love me. My love is certainly bigger than the whole universe, is that okay for you?”

 

They both chuckle and Chaeyoung squeezed Mina’s hand as they continue to admire the shining stars above them. It’s so beautiful and that moment is one of the moments they want to cherish and keep because it’s simple yet enchanting.

 

“Mina, do you know that I’m really grateful to have you in this life?”

 

The older just hums, enjoying the midnight breeze as she enjoys the way she leans her head on Chaeyoung’s shoulder and their hands still intertwined.

 

“It’s like you see something in me that no one else can. It’s always you who have always been there when the world turned its back to me. You’re the one who always believed in me, who always support and appreciated me in any way you can. Sometimes I ask myself if I really deserve that kind of person who loves all of me, even if I have flaws and imperfections, and I will just go back to that certain moment when our hands immediately went into each other’s waist and the other to make a hand heart. It was truly magical to meet you in this life, Mina”

 

Cold night breeze made Mina went back to reality and saw her whole bedroom so dark that she doesn’t have any plans on turning on the lights nor eat dinner and lower down the temperature of the air conditioner. She tried to gather all her memories back, but it just gives her a tug at her heart.

 

Too bad, it was just all in Mina’s memory because it will never happen again as Chaeyoung just asked Mina some space, saying she is too tired and exhausted from their relationship, saying she doesn’t want the girl to be hurt any further and that’s why she’s letting her go.

 

Right. She’s letting her go.

 

After all those 7 wonderful years they shared with each other, Chaeyoung decided to let Mina go, even if she declared that she still love her.

 

Mina’s too afraid for this to happen and her tears just knew their way out of her eyes, falling from it like a waterfall and it’s so hard like the rain that day. She cannot help but let it all fall and let herself finally given up from the emotions she has been holding for a week already.

 

“I ing hate this. I ing hate you.”

 

It’s just an indication that Mina is indeed angry—she’s not sure yet if she’s angry with herself, with Chaeyoung, with their relationship, or with the universe who let that freaking break up happen between the two of them.

 

For the record, Chaeyoung did not technically said that they are already breaking up because she just said that she wants space and she’s letting her go for a while first to find herself and clear her thoughts, but for Mina, it’s already a ‘breakup’ and that excuse, you just want to sugarcoat it when it still hurts.

 

The younger said there’s no sparks already in their relationship, that she suddenly can’t feel all the excitement she had back then whenever they hold hands, make eye contact, share sweet kisses, and such things. She said that she’s overwhelmed and full, thinking she suddenly doesn’t want any skinship nor relationship because she wants to be alone at the moment.

 

Of course, Mina would understand. They always talk to each other 24/7, see each other almost every day, even if they live in different apartment buildings, but the thing she doesn’t understand is that there is no specific reason why Chaeyoung was suddenly exhausted with their setup when she is trying her best to make the girl feel that she’s the only one for her and that she meant every word when she said that she love her more than anything in this world.

 

Chaeyoung put her headphone and listen to all the sad and depressing songs she has in her phone, but no tears are falling in her eyes, no matter how her heart aches for the nth time that time.

 

“I love you, but I’m letting go”

 

Her own voice still echo in her mind and she knows in herself that she immediately regrets saying those words to Mina, even if she partly mean to hurt the girl so it will not further sting strongly for her. But she thinks that no matter what she say, at the end, she will still hurt Mina.

 

Nevertheless, Chaeyoung believes that if one loves somebody, they got to set them free and that’s exactly what she did.

 

Even if she wants to continue their relationship badly because they love each other so much, she personally think it’s better for her to have some space first and clear her thoughts with the sudden confusion because she believes Mina doesn’t deserve confusion, she doesn’t deserve half or just one-fourth of love because she totally deserves a whole grand type of love.

 

So, even if it hurts for the both of them, Chaeyoung needed to let go, even if she loves Mina. That’s just how their relationship ended: bittersweet.

 

Mina and Chaeyoung’s relationship is the definition of ‘right love at the wrong time’ and they hate every bit of it.