Ahn Yujin has always been a smart kid, always. Outstanding, popular and unique.

Special.

She knows that, fully aware of herself.

She just didn't know how much cruel fate can be.

See, the thing is, whoever she is, she will end up falling in love one day, after all love is something people cannot avoid even if they want to. Sure, they can refuse to confess to the other, but that doesn't mean their heart will stop longing for one and only figure during that time.

And that person has to be Kim Minjoo.

Ahn Yujin rubs her forhead in helplessness.

What can she do? She is falling, deeper and deeper, and at the end of the day they can't be together to catch the person they are yearning for.

Another sigh escapes her lips. This world is cruel. Fate is cruel.

Yujn heard something sounds like her tear drop onto the book she is reading.

Minjoo, she mutters her name, Minjoo, oh god, (no not ohmygadnish she's not like her dumb unnies) oh Minjoo.

She admits she has read Jinjoo fanfics - don't blame her! She had nothing to do that day and she caught Minjoo watching their FMV, she never knew she is that whipped for the older girl but well, it made her curious. AFF is everyone's first choice when it comes to fanfics, she got it, she used to be a fan girl too. Maybe still is, but whatever.

And damn what's wrong with their shippers? They have M blood running in their veins or what? Swear to god Ahn Yujin had never cried that much since that fateful day.

Always so tragic. Always so painful.

She recalls some heartbroken endings and finds her tears running silently down on her face. Why she has to look up in some fanfics to get her heart shattered into million pieces? She has already got it, right here, right now, their sad ending.

In real life.

You had a lover.

Yujin stares at the sky outside, she just wishs she could stop crying.

I don't think it was a good relationship. For example, you had to meet in secret.

They cut it. Yujin sniggers quietly. The next part which she was trying to gather the informations and explain them to see if she got it right wasn't shown. Whatever, she would burn OTR one day as payback.

Maybe Mnet too. Gotta ask Eunbi unnie later, considering it as her apologize for everytime she wreaked havoc their dorm. Hope Eunbi unnie could get something healthier in her bucket list after they set those places on fire.

I think you will meet again in this life.

Yujin smiles despite an unbearable pain in her heart. If it's true, oh come on, scratch that, she has been pinning over Jinjoo fanfics since forever, she believes it is true, and she's met her lover.

Her lover. Her Minjoo.

Yujin puts down the book, she's afraid she would rip it off if she continues holding it while thinking about what they could have.

What they could have. Can she still call Minjoo hers? They - they are, they - done, they are done now. It's over.

There's no chance left for them, no, Yujin cluchted her shirt where her heart is squeezing tightly, bending upward while suppressing the pain. Too overwhelming, Yujin doesn't want to think about how Minjoo always buried her face against Yujin's shoulder, it is too hurtful, no, please - stop.

You all had unfulfilled love.

Even now, even now - Yujin feels like dying, they can't be together. She can't have that happy ending with Minjoo, there isn't a day she wakes up without tearing up remembering they have came to a parting of the ways. It feels like being thrown back into the reality, sometimes she begs herself to stay asleep forever, maybe it will be a better chance for she not to endure this, not anymore.

What do you like about Minjoo?

Minjoo? Everything about her!

Yujin doesn't know since when, no she totally has no idea, not to mention digging up the memories now is not an option at all... But really, since when did she fall for Minjoo? Maybe during a tired day from Produce48, or around the time they started living in the same dorm?

Minjoo until the end.

She doesn't care, alright? She doesn't give a crap. No matter how long she has chosen Minjoo, she would always choose the older girl again, over and over, given the chance.

Just, maybe, not in this life.

Let her repeat once again, both world and fate are so merciless.

Not this life. Not idol life. Stupid industry, Ahn Yujin grits her teeth, she should have known it'd break her heart sooner or later. She knows how it works, she understands where she's going in when she sat in front of the trainees under the Produce48's roof, however, life always spins something out of control, and Ahn Yujin can only hopelessly seeing her heart slowly slipping away.

Kim Minjoo had tried to catch it, she did, after all Minjoo doesn't care much, unlike Yujin. And guess what, Ahn Yujin of course didn't allow it, their careers just start. They still have a whole future in front of them...

wonyo: unnie, boss wants us to meet the new trainees. seem like we r gonna debut with them.

Yujin looks down, Minjoo's smile on her wallpaper pushs her straight to an agonizing pain. We don't stand a chance, Minjoo ah, we really don't stand a chance against this world. History is repeating itself, and I don't know what to do. I just hope, maybe in a parallel universe, we could stay together forever with the girls, and I would hold your hand through up and down. I don't care if people still labelled our relationship as a not good one, or i had to meet you in secret just like our past life, not that secret since our members keep teasing us but you know what i mean right? Hide everything from the public eye. Dangerous but i really-don't-care. At least we had another bite of the cherry. At least i had you, next to me, beside me.

I love you, Minjoo.

You heard that?

I love you. I love you, so much.

Until the end.