“I got my driver’s license last week…”

Minjoo drove around the suburbs in her brand new white range rover that her father gave her as a gift for her twentieth birthday. The windows were down and the wind was blowing through her hair like a scene in a music video. The soft humming from the radio was heard, just loud enough to not disturb the peaceful atmosphere.

The now twenty-year-old just got her driver’s license this morning and she was celebrating by driving around town with no particular destination in mind. She never thought she would enjoy driving as much as she does because she always preferred being in the passenger seat. 

Now though, the feeling of being the one behind the wheel was indescribable. It was so peaceful, calming, and oh so addicting that she just wanted to drive forever and never stop. It was like she could breathe again for the first time in a while. Her heart was light and she felt a sense of relief. 

Unfortunately, that relief didn’t last as she unknowingly drove past familiar houses and straight through her ex’s street. Her mood suddenly souring, a frown appeared on her flawless face, further deepening at the sight of the house that she would never forget. 

All of sudden a breath got caught in her chest and she couldn’t breathe. Painful memories she tried so hard to forget resurfaced in her mind and the stabbing in her heart came back.

Kim Chaewon

Her ex-girlfriend, her first love, her first kiss, the girl she is still so madly in love with, and the girl who doesn’t love her anymore, the girl who didn’t really love her in the first place, because as it turned out she has been in love with someone else since the very beginning.

It ing hurts doesn’t it? Chaewon was Minjoo’s whole universe, but Minjoo was just a star inside Chaewon’s galaxy because the older girl sought the sun unknowing that she already had the brightest star in her arms.

The twenty-year-old couldn’t handle the painful memories coming back to her all at once and she had to stop the car on the side of the road. And of ing course she just had to stop somewhere that has a full view of the house where she learned to love, but now hated remembering. 

She could still recall the very first-timeChaewon asked her out on a date. It was so random because they just finished a boring assembly at the school auditorium when the older girl made her move.

“Minjoo, do you want to go out with me?” The said girl was shocked at her school senior’s out-of-the-blue question. “We could have tteokbokki after school?” 

With wide eyes and a blush covering her cheeks, Minjoo agreed. “O-okay…” She could not believe this was happening. “Maybe we could watch a movie together too?”

The younger girl wasn’t expecting it, but it wasn’t like she would refuse. This was Kim Chaewon we’re talking about! One of the best vocalists in the entire school, she would have been a fool not to accept.

Funny how it turned out she was a fool for accepting that date. Funny how it turned out that would be the decision she would think about for the rest of her life. 

Minjoo wants to regret ever saying yes to Chaewon in the first place, but she can’t bring herself to. Her heart may be broken and she might feel hurt in so many ways, but she can never regret doing the things that made her happy.

And Chaewon made her happy.

Even if it was just temporary, even if it didn’t last, even if it wasn’t real because it was. It was real for her, but it wasn’t real for Chaewon and there was nothing Minjoo could do to change that fact.

The truth was harsh, it hurt, it hurt so ing much, but what could she do? She loved Chaewon so much that even if it meant letting her go without a fight she willingly did it just to make the older girl happy.