Nobody in the kingdom was oblivious of the upcoming ball at the Ivory Chateau where the royal family resided. It was an exclusive event to celebrate the day of the young princess’s birth only for those relevant enough to be invited but the general public were exhilarated all the same at the idea of other nobles and royalties gracing their kingdom, thrilled at the fine silks they would don and giddy at the bonny ladies of the ton they might have the honor to witness. There were also the festivities held in the streets that would last for a week, ample time to commemorate their princess’s special day.

 

Needless to say, the ball was the talk of the kingdom.

 

It was the talk within the pristine ivory walls as well, though not quite in a similar light.

 

Servants were busy running around, getting the enormous palace ready for the grand event due only a week away. There were touch ups, checks, double checks, and final checks to ensure that everything would be perfect and every minor possible disturbance would have ready solutions. The queen would want everything to be impeccable for her precious daughter.

 

Most people would find that endearingly sweet. Princess Winter, however, would beg to differ.

 

That affection was a sugar-coated collar heavy around her neck, pulling in all directions that she had no strength, no power to deny.

 

And so when sweet mother announced at the dining table one wonderful morning that she was to hire someone to personally train her in dancing, all she could do was smile and nod along with a muttered, “That would be lovely.”

 

She had already learned how to dance--been learning it ever since she could remember; the grace, the posture, the poise in which to execute each step. She was already familiar with them all, so she deemed an instructor unnecessary. But the queen’s words were law and no one, not even her own daughter, could go against that--save for the king himself.

 

Now as preparation for meeting her instructor, she sat at her vanity table one afternoon as maidservants tended to her hair with various oils and menacing-looking accessories. Facing the reflection made her stomach turn, having seen it way too many times in her entire life that it was starting to distort into something downright hideous, borderline monstrous even.

 

The emptiness in those eyes they call beautiful would haunt her in her dreams.

 

Servants braided her golden locks, holding it up with various ornamental pins and put her in a flowing violet dress that fell freely to the ground. Winter was convinced the corset was designed as a fashionable torture device and honestly thought it would be wise to use it on felons. Surely, the truth would come straight out of their mouths when put under the pressure of the cunning stomach-traps, though she would never voice this aloud.

 

Pinching her cheeks for color as a final touch, the women stepped back and admired their work. “Stunning, your royal highness. Simply stunning.”

 

Winter stared back at the reflection she was starting to grow frightened of. Stunning indeed. Much like an embellished porcelain. Beautiful, but inanimate and cold.

 

She headed to the ballroom, where her new instructor was supposedly waiting for her. Getting it over and done with would be best. The week would pass and a few faux smiles and empty words exchanged later, the ball would soon be history.

 

With a deep breath, she entered the room.

 

The stranger was by the enormous windows, seemingly looking down at the enormous manor grounds. With the sunset pouring in, she could only see the feminine silhouette, her rich blue dress, the manner of utmost grace that she held herself, and the faint yet alluring outline of her profile.

 

The lady turned, hearing the door shut close. She still couldn’t make out her face until she slowly stepped away from the window and closer to Winter. The sun’s glare was out of the way and their eyes met. A wave of nostalgia poured over her with a sharp intake of breath.

 

It’s her.

 

There was no mistaking those slanted red lips, the beauty mark resting just beneath, smoldering dark eyes that held deep secrets and unknown promises, a fire dancing in the midst of those clandestine orbs making flames scorch Winter’s neck, its way up to her cheeks.

 

She had always envied it, how her eyes looked so alive.

 

She watched as the woman dipped into a curtsy, not once breaking eye contact and it was making Winter’s breath hitch. How a mere gaze could spark so much effect, she did not know.

 

“A pleasure to finally meet you, your royal highness.” the woman purred, drawling voice deep and sultry, just the way she remembered. A pleasure to finally meet her, she says, but the glint in her eyes told the unspoken ‘again’.

 

“Likewise.”

 

“May I?”

 

Winter stared at the bare hand, ungloved just to take hers. Reluctantly, she took off her glove and placed her hand on the waiting palm.

 

A soft hand enveloped hers, touch gentle yet firm and it did not seem like she was planning on letting go anytime soon. Winter subtly tilted her head to the side, questioning. The lass merely smiled.

 

“So you’re the woman who’s destined to run this craphole?”

 

Winter frowned, “‘The woman’?” she echoed, outraged, “I am a princess, and I will be addressed as such.”

 

She only grinned, as though she had said nothing that could cost her her head. “That should not have been your biggest issue with that sentence, your royal highness.” without missing a beat, she introduced herself, “I am the daughter of Lord Henry, marquess of the south, and the Thorntones call me Karina.”

 

Karina. Karina. Karina. “I admit I am quite surprised by your youth. My mother is not exactly one to hire amateurs.”

 

The lady--Karina. Karina. Karina--did not seem to take offence and instead graciously held her smile. “But my princess, age does not equate to wisdom.” she finally let go of her hand, fingers lingering. “Her majesty specifically told me she meant to choose younger female instructors for her daughter. She thinks you would prefer the company of a younger soul, closer to your age. And the comfort of being with a woman, of course.”

 

Winter nodded, “The queen knows what’s best for me.” she said, almost robotic.

 

Karina clasped her hands behind her back, “As the queen had instructed, I shall teach you everything I know of the art of dancing. You are the princess, and I am your mere subject. However, in this ballroom, I am the mentor and you are the mentee. I will not be lenient, regardless of your lineage.”

 

“Of course.” Winter answered. “I am not a stranger to this arrangement.”

 

“Very well. Then if you’ll excuse me, I’ll get the turntable ready.”

 

It has not been long since they first met, which was also the last time they saw each other. A ball her family attended one night in summer. The festivities had been in full swing yet Winter had stayed at the corner, preferring to keep to herself and away from all the socialization she secretly called, ‘ruckus’.

 

She had tried her best to stay away from trouble, but it was trouble that found her in the form of a lad who had introduced himself as the duke’s son. He kept the conversation running all by himself, with little to no input from Winter at all and while she found it impressive, it was not any less of a nuisance.

 

“My father says he's going to be to be your father's royal advisor.” the lad went on, blissfully ignorant of the plethora of ways in which Winter had already fantasized about zipping his mouth. She had run through the list of all the sins she had ever committed, as he went yammering on. It was a long list, to be sure but nowhere in the Divine Comedy was there a level of hell where the damned were cornered for an eternity by dullards of unspeakable crassness. It must have been something she’d done in a past life, Winter had concluded, some karmic punishment being meted out over multiple incarnations. Though she was still left puzzling over what exactly anyone could have done to deserve this…“I do not normally care about such politics but my father thinks--”

 

“Corruption charges are currently being filed against the duke as we speak in relation to the allegations of his...ah, rather ill-considered investments.”

 

Winter was able to hold back a gasp, instead calmly turning to the newcomer who had come up behind her, unceremoniously cutting off the endless, one-sided conversation with her drawl of effortless superiority.

 

“I’d suggest trusting his wisdom slightly less than his council did.” her savior had given him a sweet smile before offering an arm to Winter who had been admittedly gaping, “My apologies for making you wait, your royal highness. Shall we go?”

 

Winter knew not who she was but not one second did she hesitate to grab her arm like a life buoy. “Lead the way.”

 

That ball proved to be the most memorable night in Winter’s life; a blur of candlelight, music, a beauty mark beneath slanted red lips, and eyes that drew Winter in like a moth to fire.

 

This week was just about to outstage that.

 

Strings echoed in Ivory Chateau’s vast ballroom, tone strong and perfervid. Winter watched, frozen in awe, as Karina gracefully danced with the music, intense eyes focused and movement smooth and fluid, seemingly effortless. It was a dance she hadn't learned before. Never in her life had she witnessed such poignant performance, she mused as the woman elegantly swept across the floor, steps rehearsed and hips hypnotic. It was pure art, beauty in motion Winter was honored to behold.

 

At that moment she understood why her mother had decided on choosing Karina as her instructor. The lass was easily as skilled, if not more, than most of the mentors that Winter had gone through.

 

Much faster than she liked, the dance ended and Winter did not know if applauding would be enough to express her appreciation.

 

“That was very impressive.” she ended up saying, hands primly clasped.

 

Karina turned off the music and the silence that followed was deafening. “That was just a look at the kind of dance you are going to learn.” she stepped away from the turntable and started to approach her.

 

“In a week’s time? Are you jesting?”

 

“You will only need the basics.”

 

Karina stopped right in front of her. “Tango,” she started, a little breathless, taking a step into Winter’s personal space, making the latter instinctively step away but before she could, a hand cupped her back and pulled her close. She took Winter’s hand, touch featherlight, and gently placed it on her shoulder.“Is a little like a seduction.”

 

Oh, heavens help her. She’s seduced enough already.

 

This week was going to be a particularly exquisite brand of hell.

 

“It is a passionate dance,” Karina’s fingers trailed from her elbow to her palm, clasping her hand and bringing it up in an angle. “Which earned it the sobriquet, ‘Dance of Love’.”

 

Warm breath hit her cheeks, their noses almost touching at the close proximity that drowned Winter in the fragrance of spring. It made her quite uneasy, though not in a bad way like her previous male partners did. Perhaps she did appreciate her mother’s efforts of getting her a younger and female instructor.

 

Karina led the dance. A step with her left foot, followed by her right, gradually curving to the left. “Follow my lead,” the warm hand briefly left her back to tilt her chin up, forcing her to meet dark eyes. “Bend your knees. Not like that. Lower. Now, take a step backward. Relax. Just like walking. Slow...slow...quick, quick, slow… And repeat. Slow...slow...quick, quick, slow… Again.”

 

Winter kept either accidentally stepping on Karina’s foot, or being stepped on, both of which her instructor would reprimand with a stern click of her tongue.

 

“In tango, the simplest thing is the hardest thing. When you are on two feet, you are at rest. When you are on one foot, you are dancing. Wait, don’t bring your feet together. That belongs to the next step. Skate on one foot. Glide.” Karina coached, her deep velvet voice just a level above a whisper, yet firm. “Now, step. Bring your feet together and reach--all in one motion. When the feet pass, they kiss--they touch. Reach the foot, point the toe, go a little farther. Travel...do it again. Gather. Reach. Go. No, don’t close your legs. That belongs to the next step. Let’s do it again, all in one motion: gather-reach-step. Keep going: gather-reach step. Again. Gather-reach-step…”

 

Winter struggled to keep up, closing her eyes to focus on nothing but Karina’s voice--gather-reach-step, gather-reach-step. They kept a slow pace, repeating the pattern over and over again.

 

“Karina,” Winter blurted as they swept hand-in-hand across the room, meaning to quietly taste the name but the lass was too close, without a doubt hearing it if her raised brows were of any indication. “It is a pleasure to finally put a name to your face.” she added.

 

A chuckle. “So you remember.”

 

Winter nodded. “And it seems that you do too.”

 

“Oh, believe me. I would not be here if I did not.”

 

Winter did not understand the connotation of that. “I did not need saving, by the way. During that night, I mean.” she mentally reprimanded herself at her eloquent choice of words.

 

“Ah, yes, I assume you were thoroughly enjoying his political monologue. My apologies for crashing the party.”

 

Winter glared at her, earning a grin that revealed a dimpled cheek. “Thank you, though. If I had to endure five more minutes of his nonsense…”

 

“We would have a body to bury?” Karina guessed.

 

Winter let out an offended gasp, “How could you be so crude?”

 

“Oh, pardon me. What was it you meant to say then?”

 

“If I had to endure five more minutes of his nonsense then I would seriously consider bringing his entire family and their next five generations down clawing for dirt only to come up with nothing.”

 

Karina stared at her before bursting into laughter. “And you call me crude.”

 

“I said I would only consider.”

 

“Same thing.”

 

“It is obscene of you to suggest I would bury only one body.”

 

Winter watched her laugh harder without any ladylike reservation that had always pinned Winter down, admiring how it lit up her entire face and dispelled her intimidating reticence. It was refreshing, to hear the sound of happiness loud and clear from a woman.

 

“You are your father’s daughter.” Karina remarked upon regaining composure, even spinning Winter in her arm spontaneously.

 

“Why, thank you.”

 

They continued the exhilarating tango around the room. Winter was familiar with its pattern now: slow, slow, quick, quick, slow, effortlessly harmonizing with Karina’s movements, each step a dialogue unsaid. Winter’s heart sang to her own song in exhilarated beats and she could only hope to heavens above that Karina could not feel its rib shattering resonance akin to a blowing brass horn.

 

Their gazes held its own conversation, curious and unraveling. Karina’s eyes were one of a kind. They were the most magnificent of browns, glittering like lake water grazed by sunshine.

 

She wondered what Karina saw in hers. Did she get a glimpse of the dark, restless soul she has been trying her hardest to bury deep within? Suddenly unsettled, Winter averted her gaze, blown by insecurity out of nowhere.

 

“It would be lovely to dance to music now,” she said, “Do you not think so?”

 

“If you are prepared then I do not see any harm.”

 

Music filled the enormous space once more and Winter closed her eyes as Karina took her in her embrace again. Opening up a space within herself, she let the violins fill it and become a part of her. She put everything behind her, as temporary as it was. Right now, Karina’s warmth was all that mattered.

 

Together, they tangoed into the night.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Days have passed and gone like a blur of warm breaths, floral notes, and the intense yet melancholic minuet resonating in the wide expanse of the royal ballroom. Time slipped by so fast that even Winter was caught breathless.

 

She was mastering the dance faster than she’d like. A week was fleeting, but with her pace, it might even get shorter. At night she would lay on her bed, wide awake thinking--knowing that she did not want it to end.

 

Accepting so was one thing, figuring out why was another matter altogether. She had tried, dissecting every thought into imaginary maps, writing it out to be visible on paper that she soon ordered to be burnt. The result of her extensive introspection was fruitless, however.

 

The lady had always had such powerful effect on her, though she could figure neither how nor why nor even what. Was it intrigue? Curiosity? Fascination? Sheer interest? None of those words felt quite right. Perhaps it was the mixture of everything at once. If so, then what was the name of such emotion? Admiration? Adoration? Wonder? Winter was at a loss.

 

Coping with solitude has always been a challenge she must go through every single day, and having Karina there made it a little easier, a little more bearable. Her heart had always ached for a friend, and her instructor had turned out to become just that in only three days time. Karina’s fearless jabs at the royal privilege was refreshing and while Winter should be insulted, her crown only felt lighter.

 

Yes, perhaps that was it, the reason why she would hate to see her go.

 

“Do you ever wonder how many years it will take for people to start a rebellion and overthrow you, once you are queen?”

 

There she goes again,saying things that made Winter fear for her life. She was dancing alone today, Karina merely supervising. She did not like it, but alas, her power did not extend to her teacher. Not in this ballroom, at least.

 

“No.” she answered as she executed a molinete around an imaginary partner, “I think about how little effort it would take to have your head cut off and hung on my wall.”

 

Karina laughed, unguarded and frank and Winter found herself smiling. “You think you’re all that, don’t you?”

 

Winter shot her a smirk. “I do not think. I know.”

 

“So modest.” Karina drawled.

 

“I will soon rule the most powerful kingdom that currently exists. I do not believe modesty should be expected of me.”

 

“You sure have a lot to say for someone who has been messing up her eights for the entire hour now.” Karina approached her. Taking her hand and placing her palm firm on her back and Winter was once again in the presence of the flowers that had grown to become her favorite.

 

“I did not think you would notice,” she said, a bit surly. “As you seemed rather taken by the carvings on the wall.”

 

Karina chuckled and they began their dance: right, left, right, left. “Have you been committing mistakes on purpose, is that it? To test whether I am paying attention or not?”

 

Winter avoided her eyes. “You would be a lousy instructor if you focus on anything but your student.” she reasoned.

 

Karina smiled in reply, dark eyes holding a certain knowledge. They traveled across the dance floor, heeled steps echoing as they rode the accented notes. Winter kept dancing off-beat, stepping prematurely ahead of the music.

 

Karina didn’t reprimand her and instead leaned closer. “For a fine dancer,” she murmured into the princess’s ear. “I must say you are doing an equally fine job at pretending to be terrible. I have seen you practicing in your room. You are better than this.”

 

Winter felt warm blood rush to her cheeks, embarrassed to be caught of her blunder. “How can you tell?”

 

“You’re doing it perfectly now, see?” Karina chuckled, “You match my steps without a problem as soon as your concentration is broken. Why you would exert such unnecessary energy to make mistakes is beyond me when you can channel it to do better instead.”

 

Winter chewed on her lip. Karina’s right, of course, but she liked it when she stepped close to correct her, liked how her deep voice sounded when she muttered instructions, liked the excuse of longer practice hours. Once she mastered the dance, would her mother send Karina away?

 

“I get--um--nervous, in front of people.” she lied through her teeth, eyes settled on the beauty mark on Karina’s chin.

 

“The queen is wondering why you are not improving in time for the ball.”

 

Oh no. Winter bit her lip and glanced up to meet Karina’s gaze. “...have I got you into trouble?”

 

The girl just smiled. “Not yet.” she said, voice soft. “But I have a feeling that soon you will.”

 

They continued with their tango, a step taken after another. Winter did not make an effort to go off-beat anymore. She danced her best, like how she would whenever she practiced at sleepless nights, swift and quick to catch on to her partner’s movements.

 

Their feet set off in a game of tag, back and forth, back and forth across the slick marble floor. Dipping forward and looking into her eyes, Karina’s fingers tightened on her ribs as her left foot chased back Winter’s. They stopped, toe to toe, and Karina pulled Winter’s hips close to hers.

 

Labored breaths mingled, gazes charged and lips threatening to brush until Karina pushed her away, as though she were too terrible, yet too wonderful as she held onto Winter’s hand, catching her as their arms pulled taut and spinning her out only to reel her back in, unable to give her up.

 

Karina’s smile was small but radiant, eyes filled with pride as Winter fell into her arms that wrapped her tight. “Very impressive, your royal highness. You are even better than I expected.”

 

“He who has begun has half done,” Winter retorted, breathless partly from the intensity of their dance, mostly from their dangerous proximity.

 

“I should have guessed that you would read Horace.” Karina mused, reflecting on the quote.

 

“And whose literature do you prefer?”

 

“I’m afraid my tastes run more Hellenic than Roman. I have been making my way through the fragments of Sappho as of late.”

 

Winter recognized the lyric poet of Lesbos, knew very well of her life story, and the revelation of Karina reading her works left her with much to think about. “I have not had the pleasure to indulge myself in more literature, as my light readings these days are more focused on political and economical endeavors.” she paused, hesitating, before taking that leap, “Do you mind letting me hear some Sapphic Poetry?”

 

If Karina found the request suspicious, she did not let it show. She hummed in thought. “‘He seems equal to gods that man,’” she recited, voice smooth yet its low timbre brought trembling to Winter’s knees. “‘whoever he is who opposite you sits and listens close to your sweet speaking and lovely laughing--oh it puts the heart in my chest on wings for when I look at you, even a moment, no speaking is left in me.”

 

“Mmm.” Winter hummed, warm blood thrumming beneath hot flesh. Though she herself was well-versed in Sapphic poetry, she enjoyed listening to Karina’s chosen fragments, and enjoyed that tickling feeling that came with deciphering if it had any significant meaning or none at all.

“Tell me more.”

 

“‘You came and I was crazy for you, and you cooled my mind that burned with longing.’”

 

Karina released her, back into her arms, and then dipped low. Winter could count each eyelash, each copper flecks in her eyes of molten bronze. It’s the way Karina looked at her, holding her captive and making everything else melt away--the empty ballroom, the trickling time, the hefty crown on her head.

 

“‘Someone will remember us, I say,’” Karina whispered the sweet words, unprompted, “Even in another time.’”

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Winter settled with adoration at first.

 

Everything about Karina was wonderful, even that tiny beauty mark on her chin oozed of endless charm. Naturally, anybody would be bewitched. It was not until her eyes started to linger not on the lady’s mole but on her plump pink lips, started to wonder how it would feel pressed against hers, started to crave for the hand on her back to wander that she started to question: was it still innocent adoration or has it evolved into something sinful? Like attraction. Or enticement. Or...lust.

 

It was troubling and only resulted in more than just sleepless nights. Yearning had replaced jumping sheep with a dancing woman, graceful and lithe, and all Winter could think of was how it would feel to run her fingers through silky dark hair, how flawless skin would taste on lips that hungered. It was almost animalistic, how she started eyeing that slender neck, wondering if it would be okay to sink her teeth into supple flesh like a vampire of old.

 

The incessant want horrified her, but it was undeniably there. The growing impatience in her gut was only made worse by the fact and constant reminder that the ball was nigh yet Winter held herself back, worries of what the king and queen and the entire kingdom would do if they found out looming at the back of her mind. It was all that it took for her to keep her distance, hands not daring to touch the lady in her fantasies in fear that she might just give in.

 

She pondered about her...indecent urges while her fingers danced across the pianoforte’s keys of black and white, Liebestraum’s notes produced from dainty fingertips reflecting her state of mind.

 

“A fine piece of choice, I must say.” Karina’s voice made her jump, ring finger landing on the wrong key. “But it sounds quite turbulent. What’s on your mind?”

 

Winter’s eyes automatically swept through the lass’s blessed figure clad in a vibrant red dress, the slim waist and peeking collarbones from the plunging neckline. Her lustrous dark hair was freely let down and Winter had never seen tresses so perfect. The desire in the pits of her stomach burned and she tore her eyes away.

 

She would have quite a lot to confess at the chapel tonight.

 

“What are you doing here?” Winter demanded. She stood, looking at everywhere but Karina.

 

“I heard you were not feeling well so I took liberty to bring tea to your boudoir.” the clack of a tray of teacups being placed on a table. “How are you, your royal highness?”

 

Winter chewed on her lip. She had almost forgotten she had made the excuse of being sick just to avoid Karina and settle her...personal matters. She needed to be away from the woman, not have her in her chambers like this.

 

“I’m fine.” she cleared , “Thank you for the tea. You may go now.”

 

Dark eyes were on her, an army of phantom ants crawling up her back. “Actually,” footsteps slowly approached her. “I have something else in mind.”

 

Winter turned and instantly regretted it. Karina had been standing close behind her and now they were face to face. She focused on the beauty mark on her chin, but even that was alluring. She swallowed, throat dry. “What is it?”

 

“What do you say we take a walk?” Karina suggested. “I admit I have not been able to see the entirety of your palace. I will be more than honored if you can show me around, your royal highness.”

 

Winter stared at that lovely smile. How could she say no? Still, she had a royal ego to uphold. “Are you asking me of this as my instructor, or as a lady of the ton?”

 

“Hmm,” pink lips were pressed together in thought, dimple showing on her cheek, “As a friend, perhaps?”

 

“No friend of mine addresses me in such a stiff manner.”

 

“Then is it safe to guess that you do not have any at all? None could survive daring to call the princess by name.”

 

“Not you. No one’s going to hurt you.” Winter blurted out. “Not on my watch.”

 

Karina cocked her head to the side, sporting a slanted smile. “Did you not want my head on your wall?”

 

I want you. On my bed.

 

Winter’s face burned in shame of her own mind Oh, what would her parents say if they discovered her...unladylike thoughts? For the love of God, they’d be petrified.

 

“Winter? Where are you going?”

 

She was already pulling the door open, “You wanted to take a walk, did you not?”

 

Winter led her around the castle grounds in silence, not trusting to speak. There was nothing to see in the Ivory Chateau other than lavish extravagance and unnecessary grandeur and she was quite sure it was nothing Karina hadn't already seen.

 

Karina stopped in her tracks as they reached the gardens, bare and snowy. She spun, facing Winter all of a sudden that her breath got caught in . “Why do you keep staring at me like that?” she asked, tone curious rather than accusatory.

 

Winter swallowed thickly. I am deciding on the best way to pick you apart. How to unravel you, undo you, and put you back together again all blissed and beautiful.

 

She clenched her fists hidden behind her back, nails digging into her skin. “I apologize,” she said instead, averting her gaze, “It was not my intention to make you feel uncom--”

 

“I didn’t say stop.” a gloved hand cupped her chin, gently tilting her head back up and forcing her to meet the smoldering gaze. She found it difficult to look away from Karina’s dark eyes, as if staring at a hypnotizing pool of hot chocolate, tempting her to come and drink in some of its sweetness and warmth. She trembled, and she was quite sure it was not because of the frigid breeze.

 

In a blur, she found herself in graceful arms, surrounded by the fragrance of blooming flowers. She knew not who made the first move, or maybe they came together both at once.

 

“It’s the perfect place to tango, don’t you think?” Karina muttered, her hoarse voice just a bit louder than a whisper

 

“It is snowing, Karina.”

 

A slow, honeyed smile spread on the brunette’s lips, drawing Winter’s eyes. Karina leads the dance, one step after another.

 

“More the need to stand close and stay in the passionate heat of our dance, no?”

 

The deafening beats of her heart drowned her voice of reason. Winter averted her gaze to the barren bush behind Karina and made sure it stayed there, hand barely even touching the woman’s shoulder, playing it safe.

 

“Is something wrong?”

 

Winter briefly met her eyes before instantly looking away, feeling singed. “No,”

 

“You’re not sick.” Karina pointed out. “Your temperature is not that of a fever. Winter, are you avoiding me?”

 

Winter chose to reply with silence.

 

“Your form is terrible.” Karina sternly pointed out. “We are only three days away from the ball. You must take this seriously, your royal highness.”

 

Winter did not respond, stubbornly being distant as they danced. She did not trust herself. No, she could feel it. One mistake and she might just lose control then and there. It was not helping that whenever she was around the fair lady, the king and queen and the crown faded away to nonexistence.

 

“Tango is supposed to be an intimate dance--”

 

Something finally snapped and Winter pressed close without warning, earning a sharp inhale from the brunette. “Like this?” she muttered, heart playing a wild rebellious beat as she let her eyes stray to those supple lips. Her palm developed a mind of its own, running along the expanse of Karina’s shoulder, twitching upon coming in contact with bare skin. “Am I doing it right?” she whispered, breath labored.

 

Karina stayed quiet, though Winter could see her jaw clenching. Her hand travelled up in accordance to her desires, trailing along her neck up to her cheek, fingers lightly caressing the tight muscle. “You brought me out here for what?”

 

“I thought to make you feel better.” Karina whispered back, eyes darting up and down from Winter’s to her lips. “It must be frustrating to be stuck in your room.”

 

“Yet you still end up making me dance.” Winter teased.

 

“I wanted an excuse to be close to you.” Karina admitted.

 

Winter hummed, moving closer and restricting their movements to a mere sway, all caution gone with the wind as she let go of Karina’s hand to loop both arms around her neck.

 

“Call my name.” she made the demand in a whisper, standing on tiptoes to reach Karina’s ear.

 

“Winter.”

 

She smiled, “Again.”

 

“Winter.”

 

“Again.”

 

“Winter.”

 

She leaned back, looking deep into Karina’s eyes--the most beautiful pair of eyes she had ever seen--before leaning in supposedly for a kiss but she stopped, hesitating. Karina’s anticipating breaths coaxed her, fingers tightening on her waist. But the crown flashed in her head for a split-second and she ended up pressing her lips on her favorite beauty mark.

 

“Thank you.” she whispered against flushed skin before untangling herself from the woman and fleeing away from the scene, chanting no over and over again in her head.

 

Karina was a forbidden fruit, and Winter wasn’t about to let herself be tempted like Eve.

 

***

 

There had been countless mistakes Winter had done in her life--lifting the teacup and putting it down the wrong way, stepping on people’s feet during dances, sewing the wrong pattern on that tapestry she was trying to weave--but never had she regretted anything as much as she regretted daring to put her sinful lips against precious skin.

 

It had shifted something between them, making the charged air a little uncomfortable and causing eyes to wander and flinch away upon meeting. Winter did not like it. She did not like the undeniable distance even as bodies press flush against each other on the dance floor, did not like the friendly smiles that replaced Karina’s previous slanted ones, and especially did not like how the woman tried so hard to act normal that it did not seem normal anymore.

 

Now it was their seventh day--the eve of the ball--and the stifling atmosphere was getting unbearable. If it was going to end like this, Winter did not want it.

 

“You must be curious about what happened the other day,” she said out of the blue, startling the other into spilling her drink. They were at the salon for a spot of tea and aimless chat as it was Winter’s rest day from practices.

 

“...what do you mean?” Karina’s feigned ignorance irritated her all the more because of the glint of anticipation apparent in her eyes.

 

“That...kiss,” Winter started, fiddling with the handle of her teacup. Taking a deep breath, she met Karina’s waiting gaze, “Was merely an act of gratitude. I just want to clarify, in case it had brought you discomfort. And if it had, then I apologize. Please do not misunderstand.” she said, tension finally ebbing from her shoulders.

 

She thought it would bring peace to Karina who obviously got unsettled by the incident, but the brunette just sat there, wordlessly staring at her without any outward reaction.

 

“Karina?” she prodded.

 

The girl flinched. “Ah, yes. Sorry. I did not misunderstand anything. You do not have to worry about it.” she gave Winter a tight-lipped smile that did not quite reach her eyes.

 

“That’s good to hear.” Winter nodded, nibbling on her saltine. The closure was supposed to dispel any awkwardness between them, but why did it feel like it had only grown thicker? She glanced at Karina, saw the pensive look on her face, and cleared , “You said you wanted to tell me something. What is it?” she said with forced cheer in her voice, diverting the topic.

 

“Oh, um.” Karina stammered and the queen’s voice vaguely echoed in Winter’s head ‘proper ladies do not stutter’, “I just wanted to ask about your plans for today.”

 

Winter daintily shrugged, “Is it not obvious? I plan to spend it in bed.” she paused before adding in a rush, “Sleeping. Alone. Is that not how rest days should be spent?” her cheeks burnt but at least it made Karina chuckle.

 

“I see.” the brunette put her elbow on the table. Her elbow. On the table. “Enjoy, then.” she smiled and her etiquette, or her apparent negligence of it around Winter, was the last thing that mattered.

 

They separated after a few more detached comments about the weather and Winter retreated back to her boudoir, as promised, regretting that she did not do anything to make Karina stay a little longer. She wondered what the lass was up to as she drew the curtains and peered into the snowy land, wishing she had at least asked.

 

From the height of the tower in which her chamber was situated, she could see past the inner walls surrounding their castle. The people were busy bustling around in seemingly good cheer as their faint yet chipper chatter reached her. She played with the curtain’s velvet material, drinking in the view and feeling each soft blow of the freezing breeze seep into her skin, turning it red, before softly sighing and letting go of the fabric, blocking out the world once more.

 

The hustle and bustle in the streets reminded her of the big event tomorrow, which also meant that it was Karina’s last day in the palace. Unless she planned to attend the ball, another important question Winter forgot to ask.

 

Huffing, she threw herself on the bed and rolled around in her sheets, kicking her feet in frustration. She should have invited Karina to do something more than tea instead of announcing how she planned to stay in her chambers the entire day. Not that there was a lot to do in Ivory Chateau but she could’ve come up with something--anything to make the last day count. Anything to make Karina remember her, even after they part, even if it meant cementing the label of ‘friends’.

 

She slipped into slumber, thinking about the could have beens and dreaming of an alternate universe where things were better, where things could be.

 

She dreamt of laughter under the sun, dreamt of dancing in the meadow with grass prickling bare feet, dreamt of warmth that soft, slender arms provide. Vaguely, she wondered even in her unconscious, if a princess was allowed to long for things she could not have.

 

A gentle shake on her shoulder made everything vanish like smoke and she’s back to staring at behind her close eyelids, dark and cold.

 

“Winter.”

 

She opened her eyes and saw an angel sitting at the edge of her bed, gazing down at her with those dark eyes and a beauty mark that held her furtive kiss under slanted lips; tangible and real.

 

“Karina?” she croaked out, rubbing sleep from her eyes. From the cracks between her curtains, she could make out the dark sky outside. “What are you doing here?”

 

“I hope you don’t mind me sneaking into your quarters.” the girl said, though the mischievous gleam in her eyes did not seem to be apologetic, “I would have went through the servants, but that would be disadvantageous, considering what I’m about to do.”

 

Winter sat up, not quite awake enough for this conversation. “What?”

 

“I’m going to steal you, princess. Just for tonight.”

 

“Wha--” before she could ask, she was suddenly pulled up to her feet. A cloak was hastily thrown around her shoulders, gloves pushed into her hands before fingers intertwined with hers, dragging her out of her chambers. “Where are we going?”

 

Karina glanced back, shooting her a smile, “We’re going to go and have fun.”

 

Just like that, Winter could not do anything but blink and stumble along as they briskly walked through corridors. She wondered how Karina knew the castle so well and voiced out her question, to which the girl just replied with a sheepish smile.

 

“I wandered a lot in my free time. ” she admitted.

 

“Then why did you ask me to show you around?”

 

“Because I wanted an excuse to spend time with you?”

 

Winter scoffed, pretending it did not make her swoon.

 

Alarmed. And maybe thrilled. Those were what she felt when Karina led her to a discreet stairwell even she had never seen before. She tightened her grip on the brunette’s hand, which the latter responded with a reassuring squeeze. Just where on earth was she planning to take her?

 

The freezing breeze of winter greeted them as soon as they stepped out of the barred door, which Karina managed to pick with the pin from her hair. Winter shivered and stepped closer to Karina, hugging her arm. Everything was covered in snow, the moon the only source of light.

 

“Your idea of fun is starting to worry me.” Winter said, looking at the dark looming trees with apprehension.

 

Karina just grinned, “You’ll see.” she tugged on her hand, briskly leading her through the forest while grumbling about how the place spooked her at night, which made Winter laugh, making a mental note to maybe have lamp posts built along the pathway.

 

Finally, they broke through the thicket and Winter found herself stumbling into a spectacular scene. The village was alive and energetic with lights and cheer and music. Sweets and pastries and drinks and trinkets were sold in the streets at a staggeringly cheap price. Winter did not understand what was going on--it was everything all at once and she was astounded by the sheer color of it all.

 

“Come on,” Karina pulled her out of her wonder, “What do you want to do first?”

 

Winter blinked, “I…” she wet her dry lips, “I’m free to do whatever I want?”

 

Karina smiled and reached out, pulling the hood of Winter’s cloak over her head, “Yes. You’re free to do whatever you want. No one would care. You can enjoy it to the fullest. All these festivities are made for you, after all.” she gestured to the flags strewn all over the place, proudly showing off a star--the symbol of their princess.

 

Winter wished the night wouldn’t end. She couldn’t remember the last time she laughed this hard. They went around, watching street performances of dancers, jugglers, acrobats, and jesters, playing games (no one could match Jimin in draughts), and stuffing themselves with meat pies and waffles and gingerbread and rice milk, buying each other pretty accessories which she already had too much of but there’s something about those streets and her companion that made it different, made it even more special than everything she’s ever owned.

 

“Are you enjoying yourself?” the question had been whispered in her ear as they watched and swayed along to a bard singing a ballad. Karina had wrapped her in her cloak, arms pressing their bodies together for warmth.

 

“Mm.” Winter hummed, closing her eyes. “A little too much, I’m afraid.”

 

“Then you should brace yourself because there’s more.”

 

“Kiss me once before thou goest, summertide sorrow. I have loved thee the most, and shall love thee to my barrow,” the bard sang her last verse and the crowd applauded before a horn sounded and excited chatter filled the air, people glancing at the sky. And then the counting started.

 

“10! 9! 8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1!”

 

“Look.” Karina nudged her chin, making her look up. It was pitch black, with a generous drizzle of stars until loud explosions erupted and colors burst in the air, like a splash of vibrant paint on blank canvas.

 

Winter’s jaw hung agape in awe as multicolored sparks filled the night sky, mingling with the stars. It was magical, like nothing she’s ever seen before.

 

Then there’s Karina who instead of watching the spectacle, had her gaze locked on her and her alone. And as the crowd yelled Happy New Year, she muttered into Winter’s ear, “Happy birthday,”

 

Winter saw her reflection from a shop’s glass window and caught someone she hadn't seen for a long time stare back. This girl’s eyes were bright and alive, unlike the hollow orbs that used to bore back on Winter’s, eerie and dead.

 

“Winter, let’s go.”

 

She stared at the hand entwined with hers but instead of following the pull, Winter stood still.

 

Worry laced the deep voice she had grown to adore, “Winter?”

 

Without warning, she pulled Karina down, meeting her halfway with tiptoes, their lips colliding in a wonderful crash.

 

Winter was certain then. It wasn’t mere admiration. It wasn’t just lust.

 

It was love.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

The ball was grand, as expected for an event hosted by the royal family themselves. Nobles from the entire land dared not miss the chance to attend the grandiose celebration. Karina’s own family might’ve been there, somewhere in the crowd if she looked hard enough, but as of the moment, she was quite busy gripping her goblet as though it was the neck of the man dancing with a certain princess.

 

Lifting up the cup to her lips, she took a sip of the wine while still glaring daggers at the dance floor. She had retreated into the shadows of the balcony overlooking the ballroom, cradling her drink and her wounds. She had chosen the perfect outfit to reflect her mood--a muslin empire gown, its décolleté square neckline showcasing the golden necklace resting upon her collarbones, the dress’s fabric as dark as midnight and, well, as dark as her mood.

 

The celebration started with a dance of tango and her eyes never once left the princess. It wasn’t difficult to spot her amidst the crowd. With her bright hair, pale skin, snowy gown, and ethereal beauty, her royal highness effortlessly shone like the star she was.

 

With her exceptional performance, one would not think she had learnt the dance in a short span of a week. Karina felt pride swell in her chest, yet there was also the nasty green monster eating it up for the longer she stared, the more aggravated she became.

 

Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to focus on Winter and Winter only. The princess was unlike any she had ever met. Graceful, a natural, and clever, and so, so beautiful. It made it quite difficult to focus on their lessons, when her student would watch her with such an intent look on her fair face, how she would press close and ask, ‘like this?’ as she trailed a hand along Karina’s arm and shoulder. It made her feel like the whole world was melting away like wax.

 

Downstairs, the dance had ended and she could see Winter in the midst of the dispersing crowd, looking around as though searching for something--or someone, who Karina was afraid might be her. She stepped back further into the shadows.

 

The moment was wonderful while it lasted. Last night was the best one yet in her entire life, without competition. She could still feel the ghost of Winter’s lips on hers, could still see the bright gleam in her eyes. It was everything she could think about, even now, as she slowly retreated to the stairway leading to the small hidden exit, away from the festivities, away from her.

 

Even a fool would be able to tell that the feelings that lay heavily in her chest wasn’t good. Not with who they were, not with the circumstances that stood between them. Karina felt like she’s in a Shakespearean play where love seemed to go hand in hand with death. And so she chose life for love, grabbing the rail and descending the stairwell.

 

“Karina?”

 

Karina stood frozen in her tracks. Taking a deep breath, she turned and faced her princess. There she stood, sporting a smile that lit up the dark hallway.

 

“There you are. I have been looking everywhere for you.” Winter took a step closer, and another, and suddenly she’s filling every inch of Karina’s vision. “Where have you been?”

 

She found it hard to breathe with the princess so near. Gripping the railing tight, she responded, “I was just about to leave.”

 

Confusion replaced Winter’s smile before it contorted into something more heartbreaking. “...you’re leaving?”

 

Karina forced a smile, “My services are no longer needed, your royal highness.”

 

Emotions flit through Winter’s face; from shock, to rage, to fear and panic and hurt. It pained Karina to watch and so she resorted to a respectful bow before turning her back.

 

“I love you!”

 

Karina sharply in a breath, feet stopping, heart stopping as well.

 

Silence followed the bold declaration, broken by an awkward clearing of throat. “I mean--That is--” Winter stammered, barely heard above the music, clearing once more before saying in her most lofty tone of voice, “I am not a child. I decide when your services are no longer needed. I must have a trustworthy companion to practice with. I can hardly spend that much time with any suitor, and it would be improper to get rusty--”

 

“You love me?” Karina softly asked. She had turned to face her, against her proper judgment.

 

There was a smile on her face. “More than anything.”

 

As though on cue, the orchestra switched to playing a crooning, intimate, and passionate tune--a song for falling in love to. Karina watched, wordless and astonished, as Winter descended the steps, stopping right in front of her. Her wrists were grabbed by delicate fingers, arms wrapped around a petite waist. Winter stepped closer, hands on her shoulder, and she was overwhelmed by the scent of vanilla and rosemary.

 

The princess rested her forehead on hers as they subtly sway to the music. “I know you feel the same, is that right?”

 

“I-”

 

“It’s a crime to lie to one’s princess.” Winter threatened and Karina could see the tinge of insecurity and worry behind her confident facade.

 

Karina wanted nothing but to reassure her but, “What of the ramifications? Have you ever thought about that? About the people around us, the people around you--”

 

“I have, more than you’d think and longer than I should.” Winter snapped, eyes ablaze and fingers digging into her shoulder blades. “I am not a naive, moon-eyed child, Karina. I have thought about it, nonstop, night and day.”

 

“Then why? Why take the risk?”

 

Winter sighed, burying her face in the crook of Karina’s neck, “Why ask? You know it’s all worth it if it’s you. Can’t we just freely love as humans?”

 

“Our love isn’t as pretty as it seems. It’s beautiful the way a two-edged sword is beautiful. It’s dangerous. It’s--”

 

“It’s the most wonderful thing I’ve ever felt in my entire life that made me want to keep on living.” Winter pulled back, looking into her eyes. “No one’s going to hurt you. I’ll make sure of that.”

 

Karina’s hand went up on its own accord, cupping the princess’s cheek. “But I cannot do the same for you.”

 

“Yes, you can.” Winter leaned into her touch. “Stay with me.”

 

Her resolve was weak and it had long crumbled down upon seeing the princess’s smile and hearing her call her name. Sighing in defeat, Karina leaned closer, their foreheads touching once more. “Okay.”

 

Winter’s smile was difficult to miss. “Tomorrow at nightfall, meet me at the secret passage we used last night. We’re going to run away.”

 

“I-” Karina thought it was crazy but Winter was looking at her so intently, honey-smile sitting pretty on her lips. “Okay.”

 

Winter broke into giggles and Karina couldn’t help but smile along, whispering her belated response, “I love you too.”

 

The princess pulled her into a hug and spoke into her shoulder, voice muffled, “I guess I won’t be having your head on my wall anytime soon.”

 

Karina chuckled, “That won’t be necessary.” she planted a kiss on her cheek, “You already have my heart in your hands.”