It is the New Year’s Eve and my sister Sowon wanted me to accompany her to her girlfriend’s party. I refused it so many times earlier but she kept on insisting that I should go and Eunha unnie wanted me to be there since she haven’t seen me for months. Their house became Sowon unnie’s second home and was my home too.

                I ended up coming with her since my friends will also be there, Umji and Yuju unnie. Of course, I’ve foreseen that I would be third wheeling again, welcoming new year while watching couples eating and each other’s mouth. So, I’m right here at Eunha unnies backyard with a bottle of beer in hand as I’ve lost count of the bottle of beers I’ve emptied but the alcohol hasn’t strike to my system, yet.

“Come on, Sinb, it’s going to be new year and here you are being loner and all. Have fun!” I rolled my eyes before turning to my dearest friend who tries to ruin my peaceful night.

“As you can see, Umji, I’M HAVING FUN, A-L-O-N-E.” Trying to emphasize each word to send her a message that she’s ruining my alone time.

“Yeah, so much having fun your . Come inside, you’re missing the party!” She exclaimed as she tries to tug me up out of my chair. I wanted to pull my wrist of her hold but she’s way stronger and successfully drag me inside of the house.

                People becoming wild, dancing to the beat of the music with the loud pounding of the bases causing my chest to throb. The sound of the music is already deafening and these people can even manage to scream out of excitement. I tried my best not to bump with anyone of them and tighten my hold to Umji not to get lost in the crowd. You see, Eunha unnie’s house is really big. Since their parents are always out for work even for special days like this, Eunha unnie became fond of hosting parties just to fill their usual peaceful house with chaotic noises from friends and strangers who comes here even though they are not invited.

“There you are! We’ve been looking for you all over the house. I even thought of checking her room if you were in there.” Eunha said trying to tease me but I just manage to give her a soft smile. I miss her little voice and all the teasing from her.

“She’s at the backyard, imbibing all the beers she sneaked out from the table earlier.”

“Yah! I only slip 1 beer! Yuju unnie gave me the case of beers without asking her.” I rebutted to avoid being scolded by my sister.

“Okay, okay, whatever. But enough drinking Eunbi.” Sowon unnie said using her tone with authority and I have no choice but to obey. I can be stubborn, but when she says stop, STOP.

                As the night becomes deeper and new year was about to come. Everyone, including me became more hyped. We started playing games, dancing and screaming and Sowon unnie completely forgotten monitoring my drinking and by now I knew I was drunk, but I wasn’t worried at all to just pass out because I’m with my friends and could stay here for tonight.

“Umji- yah, I need to pee.” As I try to excuse myself.

“I’ll go with you then.”

“No, I can manage myself.”

“You sure? The bathroom here is so dirty as hell. You’ll puke instead of peeing.” She said with her face full of disgust. “So, better use the bathroom upstairs.” And I responded with a nod and a reassuring smile.

                I grunt as I finally reach the second floor. Imagine being drunk and all and you needed to climb 35 steps. If Eunha unnie isn’t my friend I would probably just pee on the stairs instead of going to the bathroom.

                 It’s been so long since I’ve been here again and I forgot to ask Umji which door is the bathroom. All I know is I need to release this liquid inside me before my bladder explodes. I hastily opened one of the doors and I’ve lost control of my balance. With a loud thud and my groan, I fell on the floor. I tried to get up but my vision starts to get blurry because of the alcohol. I shut my eyes close trying to shake off and recover from the dizziness. I remember one of my friends told me that if the alcohol consumed you already, avoid moving too much because you’ll feel heavier and dizzy and I guess he wasn’t wrong. When I opened my eyes, I saw someone approaching me. I was trying to look who was it but the room was so dark and my blurry vision didn’t help. She slid her arms under my shoulders as she lifts me up and leans me to the wall.

“Are you okay?” She asked coldly

                I wanted to mental slap myself. I know that voice. It is my favorite voice to hear; the voice that was so sweet for my ears before it became cold because of me.

“I- I am okay.” Stuttering and I didn’t know what to do. “I-I was looking for the bathroom but I opened the wrong door, I’m sorry.” Turning back slowly as I to anything that can avert me from falling again. My knees seem to turn into jelly after seeing her unexpectedly. But before I could walk out of her room completely, she went closer to me, held my arms and guided me back to her room.

“Just use my bathroom instead.” She said softly, and guided me inside of her room. “Be careful.” She mumbles before closing the door of her bathroom.

                I may be taking too long inside but I’m scared to go out and face her again. If I didn’t decline Umji’s offer I wouldn’t end up being here at all and I started to think of different ways to go out here but of course, there’s no other way out, aside from opening this goddamn door.

                Yerin unnie and I were exe’s and I broke up with her 5 months ago. I let her go because I didn’t deserve her. She was so pure, sweet and caring but I was too hard on her. She knew that I am bad at expressing what I feel and to reciprocate the intimate actions she effectuates, but she managed to stay in our relationship for a year. I love her but I am not deserving for the love she has for me. I let her go even though she didn’t want to. She did everything she can to save our relationship but I was the one who kept on running away until she gave up. When she stopped pursuing me, I started to miss her. Her absence made me realized that I needed her. I needed her warmth and love to make me feel whole. But after what I did to her, I didn’t have the courage to face her and tell her that I want her back. I know, I’m stupid and unreasonable but the saying was true. You only realized what you have, when it’s already gone.

                Maybe this was the reason why I ended up here in the first place. Maybe it’s the chance to talk to her and confess the love I have for her and maybe a chance to ask her to start all over again.

                Taking a deep breathe, I unlocked the door. She was on her bed reading a book. With the noise’s downstairs, I was amazed that she’s not bothered at all. If I were her, I would probably be yelling at my sister telling her to end the party at once, but here she is, being calm like she always does. I froze in my place when she diverted her gaze on me and sit up from bed. I wanted to speak, but I don’t know how to start. The silence engulfs the two of us and I think she felt the awkwardness and decided to break the silence.

“I didn’t know that you’re into partying already.” As she positioned herself on her bed more comfortably.

“U-uuh, no. Sowon unnie kept on bugging me and I had no choice but to agree to come.” I said and I started to walk slowly. Still feeling dizzy, she noticed that I couldn’t walk straight.

“I think you should shake off the alcohol in your body and wait ‘til you’re just tipsy. I don’t want to see anyone falling from the stairs, worse, end you up in the hospital bed with fractured bones during new year.” She said as she continues to read her book. I guess she really loves The Little Prince, if I can remember it clearly, she already read the book 7 times and still reading it all over again and I can’t help but to smile as I try to sit on the couch that was situated on the side of the room.

“Y-yerin.”

“Hmm?”

                Hearing her hum was all does it take for me to be brave enough and completely throw out the cowardness in me. “Are you mad at me?” I said as I look at her and slightly expecting to shut me out of her room.

                My heart skips a beat when she put down her book ready to set aside and looked at me with so much care as if I was her most precious thing. “You think you’ll be here sitting in my room if I was mad at you?”

“N-no. But after what I’ve done to y-you.” I tried not to crack my voice but the emotion inside me was too overwhelming to control and I know I could burst out to tears any minute. “I-I’m—”

“It’s all in the past Sinb-yah and I don’t have the heart to hate you. It’s the last thing I would do.” The last sentence was almost a murmur but it was enough for me to hear and understand.

                I got up from where I sited and tried my best to walk closer to her but with my last step, I trip myself with my own foot as I shut my eyes close waiting for another thud. Yerin quickly runs toward me and helped me to get up again. I never thought that I could be this clumsy when I’m drunk and that I needed to be embarrassed over and over again in front of her.

                She was so close to me and I just let my drunk self to took over what I should have to do. With her arms still enveloping me, I hug her with all might. I was ready for her to push me away, but she hugs me back.

“Yerin- ah. I know this is selfish, but I want you back.” I said, letting out the words that I kept for months. “I miss you so much. Please, give us a chance.” I didn’t know if she was able to understand every word that I said because I was sobbing on her chest. “I t-take back everything I said before. I will do everything to be deserving of your love. I-I love you.”

“Please, don’t cry, Sinb-yah. In 5 minutes, it’s finally new year. A new year for us---- to start again. I love you too.” She hushed me. I slightly pulled away and looked at her.

“We broke up but that doesn’t mean I stopped loving you, Sinb-yah.” She continues, as she wipes the tears on my face. “I was still waiting for you, watching you from afar.” As she pulled me back to the hug and kissed the crown of my head.

                It felt like I was dreaming. For months, I’ve been thinking that she was angry at me and will never want to see me again, but here I am, being with her in her room; in her arms.

“Yerin-ah” I completely pulled from the hug and cupped her face using both of my hands. I know the alcohol is still in my system but I am more than sure that I needed to do this. I kissed her. I kissed her with so much passion for her to feel the love I failed to make her feel before. For being with her in a year, this is our first kiss. Yerin reciprocated the kiss and pulled away when the fireworks, firecrackers and loud cheers begin to resounded in the house.

“Happy new year, Sinb-yah.”

And we kiss again.

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This was originally story but after taking a cold shower I decided to change it LOL. It was harder to write  than I thought. Pls, give me tips so I can improve my writing kekekkee

This will be really my last update for awhile coz i need to start reviewing and accomplishing my reqs.

Acads just won't let me live in peace huhu

Happy new year again! 

Thank you for reading! Keep safe y'all! <3