Dark eyes stare into nothingness as smoke fills her lungs. The flimsy stick in between her long slender fingers almost burnt through it's bud. Smoke rings forming each time she breathes, a tear falls as she felt every fabric of her being pulled through her thoughts and the decissions she made. "I need coffee" she wispered to herself. Throwing the cigarette stick at the ground she stared at it for a while before leaving. Walking through the empty street she saw a coffee shop but decided to look for another, she failed knowing it was the holidays and people have families to go to, without a choice she came back to the particular coffee shop she avoided. As she walks through the door an all too familiar smell of brewed coffee with the hint of vanilla caught her to remember,

*flashback*

I walked in expecting to be late but you got there early, you stood there and waved I walked towards you, with your smile you wear so well I can't help to think what did I do to deserve a person such as you. I'd never ask for more. 

Your hug enguffed me, your scent quickly held on to my clothes and you said, "I miss you can we just hug forever." You left a pout in your mouth and I quickly kissed you. "You know we can't do that right?" I smiled as we both settled in.

You ordered your  favorite  with the  strawberries,  you always loved strawberries. I remembered how you surprised me, traveling so far just to see me on Valentine's day I had no idea what to give you I bought every kind of chocolate I could find at the nearest store. I laughed through the thought, you looked at need raised your eyebrows and said, " Is there something in my face?" I replied, "No, I just remembered something." I held her hand and gave her a reassuring smile.

*end of flash back*

Walking to the counter she decided to get the hardest coffee she can get, she sat at the nearest table knowing she couldn't stand being in there. Unexpectedly her phone rang, it was almost 2 am why would someone call her? It was an unknown number.

"Hello? who's this?" she confusingly asked

"..." silence was all she heard

"Who ever you are tell me now or I'll block you." she's pissed

"I-Im sorry." she froze, she recognized it all too well the voice of the caller was 'her' the girl that broke her heart.

She stood silent listening carefully, but she couldn't take it anymore she hung up.

She was so lost, so confused. Her order had came in, she took a quick sip of the bittersweet taste of black coffee and she headed out. Without a destination she walked until it lead her out of nowhere. With her coffee in her hand and a cigarette on the other she knew it wasn't going to do her good. It only took her to reminisce on her past and with her all over again. She liked the feeling, getting hurt. It was enough for her, it made her happy. Remembering the girl she loved so much, it hurts but for her the pain is enough. 

*flashback*

Sana's

I still remember the look on your face, it lit through the darkness at 1:58. Those words that you whispered for just us to know.

"I love you."  were the words you said.

*end of flashback*

"You told me you loved me, so why did you go away?" She bitterly said as tears streams through her face. 

She sips her coffee with the tears she had cried. 

She decided to head home, it was enough for her. She was exhausted. 

With no cab to be found, she walked like a dead man without a care of what's around her. She heard snickers from people, but she doesn't care. She's too tired to care. 

*flashback*

Sana's

I can recall the smell of the rain, it was fresh off the pavement. I ran off the plane, it was July 9th with the beat of your heart. It jumped through your shirt with your arms wrapped around me. 

*end of flashback*

Putting her keys at the table she slumped in the couch. She was so tired she couldn't walk upstairs to her bed.

She was tired but she couldn't sleep.

"I miss the swing in your steps, how you walk with your hands in your pocket." She needed to let it out.

"How you kissed me when I was in the middle of saying something." She cried.

"There's not a day I don't miss those rude interruptions." She confessed to herself.

She needed to let it out, it was too much for her.

She decided to call her. She needed to say the words she needed say.

It rang and someone answered.

She didn't give her a chance to say anything she just went and poured her heart out.

" I hope the sun shines and it's a beautiful day. I hope that something reminds you that you should've stayed. You can plan for a change in weather and time, but I never planned on you changing your mind." She sobbed.

She didn't expect a reply, " I love you, I still do. I don't want to be selfish you deserve someone better, better then how I treated you. I love you so much it hurts remembering all the I put you through. When everything is better love, I'll come back to you."