She came home again the same way she always does for a couple of weeks now. Even so, I still find her pretty with her face flushed as she stumbles inside our home and tried to keep her balance to keep her from falling.

 

"You're home, Love." I greeted her softly, helping her up to sit over the couch in our living room. She smells different and I swallowed thickly as my mind raced on all the possibilities as to why she doesn't smell like the Irene I love. She still has the feminine smell on her body but years of staying with her, I can distinguish her smell from others.

 

I helped her take her shoes off and loosen her woman suit. I also rushed to get her a glass of water to atleast sober her up. I know something is wrong. Irene has a high tolerance in alcohol. My Irene doesn't even drink alcohol unless there are special occasions like company parties, birthdays, and our anniversaries. The way she is looking at me right now as I help her drink the water feels different.. it is not as fond as she always looks at me. It is a strange feeling.

 

"Why?" she softly uttered, almost faint but I heard her clearly as all my attentions are towards her and her alone. I was about to ask her what she meant when she asked me that but her next following made me mum immediately, confusion and fear creeping on my skin. "Why am I feeling this way, Lisa?"

 

"Why am I like this? Why am I so weak?"

 

"Why is it that suddenly.. things are just not the same anymore?"

 

"Why am I losing that feeling, Lisa?" her voice sounds so fragile, her eyes closed but I know, just by the shakiness of her voice, that she is about to cry. And I also know that her next following words will break me.

 

"Why don't I love you the same anymore?"

 

But who am I kidding? I am already broken.

-

It has been exactly seven days ever since Irene told me about her feelings changing, her love fading and everyday after that night, I have lost my sleep, my appetite, and my happiness. I tried to be happy, to deny all those things she has just revealed. I tried to convince myself that no, that wasn't true. That was all the alcohols doing and not exactly what Irene wanted to tell and say.

 

But everyday, as Irene continues to become distant to me.. reality came crashing. We are not the same as before. Everything has changed.

 

Irene came home early tonight, she doesn't even reek alcohol like the couple of weeks. The sudden 'change' sparked a hope inside me. Maybe this is it. Maybe Irene didn't really mean what she said that night. Maybe now, she finally came to her senses and realized that hey, it's still me.

 

"Love!" I couldn't hide my excitement as I approached her, helping her take her coat off and hanging it over the rack. I enveloped her in a warm hug, holding her close to me as if afraid to lose her. But as she stiffened in my arms, I felt a pinch in my heart.

 

"L-lisa.." I pulled back and stared at her, expecting her to tell me something else, different from what I am dreading to hear. "We need to talk."

 

"About what?"

 

"About us."

 

And here we are now, seating side by side, a couple of inches apart. She is so close and yet it feels as if she is far, out of my reach.

 

"We.. I want to end this, Lisa. Whatever we have.. let's end this. We both know that after what happened, things are just not the same. I'm.. I can't keep lying to you, Lis. I am sorry but I just.."

 

"It's not the same anymore."

 

"Yeah.." We both kept mum after. I fiddled with the loose string of my shorts, desperate for the silence to stop and yet, I also want her to stop talking and to stop telling me whatever it is she is telling me right now.

 

"When did all go wrong?"

 

"We both know when, Lisa."

 

I stopped myself from retorting back, from spitting out things that I know are just denying reality. We stayed silent for a couple more minutes, me pondering and her waiting for my words. I finally made up my mind after awhile. I inhaled sharply and looked at her, almost regretting the decision I have made.

 

"Will it make you happy?"

 

"Y-yes.."

 

"Then okay." she seems suprised when I uttered that as her eyes suddenly opened wide. "But in one condition."

 

"What is it?"

 

"Fourteen Days, Irene. Just give me fourteen days. Let's continue being together for fourteen days. Let's pretend that we are still happy for fourteen days.. pretend you still love me for fourteen days and.." I stopped as a single tear fell from my eye.

 

"And after that, I'll let you be happy without me, Irene."