Another evening she spend alone in her room, another evening filled with pain. The hot tears streaming down her face were ripping her apart, something inside her shattered every time she fought with her parents. 

„You have to stop, Rina.“

„You are only hurting yourself, we only want whats best for you.“

„He destroys you.“

Hurtful phrases they repeated over and over again, nagging at her soul, eating her up from the inside. The tears kept welling up, leaving stains on her oversized sweater. Just the thought off leaving Lucas behind was beyond agonizing; it was killing her. He was her happiness, without him she would suffocate, as he was the air she needed to breathe. Why don’t they understand?

Her gaze was empty, just like the feeling inside her heart. She sat on the sill by her open window, her legs curled up in front of her chest, starring at the sky. The air was chilly, giving her goosebumps that she barely noticed because of the numbness of her body. With her face still wet and sticky, she crawled closer to the frame until her legs dangled freely over the edge. The surrounding was so peaceful and jet the voices inside her head were so loud. She couldn’t help it; She hated her parents for their behavior. Over the last weeks it got worse and worse, they talked to Rina over and over again, told her that she needed to let go of him, that he was toxic. They wouldn’t listen. 

„Why are you trying to take the one thing away from me that makes me happy? Do you want to see me suffer so badly?“, she yelled at them before she got up form the couch and ran to her room, leaving her parents behind with worried faces. 

Do they really want to see her suffer? As the question bounced through her head over and over again, she sighed, looking down to the lawn that was approximate ten feet below her. Suddenly she got very aware of the height she was exposed to. It frightened and excited her at the same time, so much, that her body started shaking. What would happen if she just…?

„What are you thinking about, idiot.“, a hushed voice, deep but soothing, whispered from behind her.

She shrugged, turning around and caught his dark, nearly black eyes, swallowing her like an abyss. He was standing right by her door, looking handsome as ever with his messy brown hair and slender figure. His expression was serious though, no hint of a smile.

„Lucas… What are you doing here? How did you get inside?“, Rina wondered, her tone somewhere between confused and relieved. 

A slight smirk flashed over his lips for a second, revealing his gorgeous dimples just for the blink of an eye.

„You know I always find my ways to get to you. Now come back inside, before you hurt yourself.“, his voice was still hushed, but stern. 

She climbed back inside her room, aiming towards her bed and gestured him to do the same. He followed her and sat on the bottom corner, leaning forward with his elbows on his thighs, supporting his flawless face with his hands. She sat on her pillow, crossed her legs and admired his features; She could do so for hour after hour without getting tired of him.

„You were fighting again, weren’t you?“, he said even quieter than before, looking at his feet with guilt written all over him.

She just nodded in silence, still watching him. 

„It was because of me again.“, he sighed and hid his face behind his palms.

She tried to reach out but couldn’t grasp him. Instead he raised his head and gave her an upset look, that she countered with a reassuring one. 

„Don’t blame yourself, they will never understand. What we have is different, it will never end. They can throw tantrums at me as much as they want, they can even try to lock me up, it will change nothing. I love you and I always will.“, she said confident, flashing a bright smile at him.

„I love you too, sweetheart. You have no idea.“, he answered, smiling back, but he couldn’t hide the lingering pain in his words. 

Still, she felt at ease. Her tears were gone; He made them disappear, as usual. The feeling of emptiness was replaced by a welcoming warmth, cozy, like coming home. Lucas presence alone made her whole, forgetting the hardships she had to deal with just minutes ago.

„You should sleep now, Princess, you have school tomorrow.“, he uttered, solicitously. 

She pouted a little, though she knew he was actually right.

„Will you stay? Please.“, she begged, with a tone sweet as honey in her voice.

She knew he couldn’t reject her, she was his most precious treasure after all. So he smiled, nodded and indicated her to lay down. She obeyed gladly, pulling her warm blanket over her chilled body. He crawled behind her slowly, laying down as well. He did not touch her, but she could feel his hot breath on the nape of her neck. It tickled slightly and she shivered, feeling hundreds of butterflies in her stomach. He truly was the best thing to happen to her. 

Her heart ten times lighter than before, she doze of, Lucas smell surrounding her. 

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

When she woke up in the morning he was gone, the right side of her bed untouched, as if he never lay next to her. It was still early, thirty minutes before she had to get up and ready for school. She felt whacked though, her face swollen and her head pounding from crying so much yesterday. Stretching her limbs she crawled out of bed, towards her door to get to the bathroom. As she reached the hallway she heard her parents talking in the basement, rather quiet but loud enough for her to overhear every word they were saying.

„Don’t you think it is still too early? It has just been a month. I mean, you heard her yesterday. The way she talked to us? Like another person, sometimes I don’t even recognize her. She changed so much.“, she heard her mum say in worries.

„Honey, Its her decision after all. As you said, it has been a month. Don’t worry, give her time and she will come back to her senses. Resuming her daily routine will be helping her to carry on.“, her dad tried to assure her.

Rina shivered. There they were again; The tears. Just a single one this time, finding its way down her cheek before she continued to the bathroom, shutting the door loudly to make sure that her parents noticed she was awake.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Her day at school was tiring, everyone of her friends acted weirdly when she entered the classroom, being too friendly and cautious. They tried to handle her with care, too much care for her liking. Even the teachers were odd, leaving her alone most of the time, instead of demanding participation in their classes. She repeated over and over again that she felt good and that she wanted to come back to school weeks ago but her parents wouldn’t let her. The glances she received in response were all saturated with incomprehension and pity, something she hated.

„Don’t give me that look, please, I’m fine. Nothing changed, so don’t worry.“, she told her best friend annoyed when it was time for lunch.

She was tired of the questions, the looks and the smiles, only given to soothe her although she was ok.

„You don’t have to keep that facade up for me, I’m your best friend. If you feel like crying today, you can. I won’t tell anybody.“, Tammy said with a low tone, caressing her right shoulder for reassurance. 

And there it was again, a smiles that wasn’t genuine; A smile towards her to prevent a lonely cold spreading in her heart. What intended to warm her from the inside was only making Rina roll her eyes for the tenth time that morning. It was exhausting to repeat herself over and over again, but she couldn’t help it.

„I told you, I’m feeling fine. The only thing bugging me is you guys talking to me like I’m retarded. I’m still the same, excepted I’m four weeks behind on our assignments. So please stop acting out like this, it feels strange.“, she clarified, earning a shrug from her friend.

„If you say so.“, Tammy gave in eventually. 

The look on her friends face was still suspicious as Rina changed the topic, but in the end, luckily, she got away with it. The only thing she wished for was going back to her normal life, without pathetic looks from the sides. After all there was nothing to feel sorry for, she still had everything she needed to move on. Lucas grinning face popped up in her mind instantly, beautiful and stunning as always. Thinking about his smooth skin and warm eyes gave her a tingling feeling in her tummy and she felt her heart starting to pound quicker. She couldn’t help but blush slightly.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________