Growing up, Sana does not understand the work of her parents. She only recalls, waking up in the morning seeing her parents leave and sleeping at night without seeing them again. Same routine every day. The only thing she is grateful in life is, for having a loving and understanding grandmother who stayed at her side while her parents are busy taking care of their client's request to go after ghosts who are haunting them. However, the truth is Sana does not care about her parents' job, until she went to the middle school and her classmates started bullying her because they find her parents' occupation absurd.

“Guys, are you aware that one of our classmate’s parents are ghost hunters? hahaha” the short haired girl tries to whisper.

“What the heck are you laughing at? You should be scared because she might bring some awful creatures here at school” the girl next to her whimpered.

“You’re already 13 years old and you still believe in ghosts? That’s so funny, Sayaka” a girl named Ichika, (according to her nametag) teased.

“Whatever!  I just don’t want to be near her” Sayaka shouted without the idea that Sana just entered the room and clearly heard their not so loud conversation talking badly about her parents’ profession.

The girls felt the awkward air and started to fix themselves to get ready on their first class acting as if they did not utter hurtful words towards Sana, who is obviously pretending that she was not bothered with what they thought against her.

Sana wishes that she could go home as much as possible to tell her grandma how terrible her first day school experienced was. As much as possible, she does not want them to talk bad about her parents because just like them, she is really clueless too of what was her parents doing too but that does not give them permission to insult them in front of her. She wants to defend her parents of course, but she promised to her grandma that she will not get into fights anymore because she maybe still a baby to her grandma’s eyes but she is a grown-up girl who needs to understand people for the actions that they are doing. Whether it is good or bad.

“I’m home!” Sana excitedly removed her school shoes at the front porch while peeking at the living room to check if her grandma was there watching dramas or knitting. She placed her school bag at the couch while wondering where her grandma is. She saw that there is a smoke at the kitchen and rushed because she remembered that her grandma promised to cook her something that she will like. She already stepped a foot inside the kitchen but her grandma is still nowhere to be find. She quickly moved her way to the electric stove because it looks like the pot was there for a long time already, when she realized that she almost step on her grandma who is unconscious at the floor. Sana started to panic, she made sure to turn off the stove first and quickly went back to her grandma to check what happened to her.

“Grandma! Wake up!” Sana made a gentle touch to her grandma’s cheeks trying to bring her back on her conscious state.

“HELP!” Sana started crying, she does not have an idea what she should do.

Sana rest her grandma’s head on her lap while still patting her head and checking her breathing. Until Grandma started to cough, and Sana felt relieved. She really thought she is going to lose her. Sana started sobbing hard.

“Sana” her grandma coughs.

“Sweetie, I’m sorry for making you worried.” The old woman apologizes. “I’m here, ssssshh honey. It’s okay” reassuring the younger girl. As Sana wipes her tears, she hears footsteps walking towards their direction. She started feeling weak too, she cannot really stand whatever happenings happen today. First she got bullied at school and now she saw her grandma lying flat on the floor. She really cannot endure it anymore. This day .  

Everything was blurry, Sana is not sure of what happened to her. She thought that it was just her being dizzy, that is why her vision is not okay. However, she realized that her parents are doing ritual that is why there are candles around her room and it was foggy. She is not sure if it is a smoke, all she knows is her parents is making her feel embarrass with all that is happening inside her room right now. She is really clueless. That is why she stands up and starts to ask them what is going on.

“Mom? Dad? What is this?” Sana interrupts her parents who are currently throwing some bean like stones in her room.  

“Please be quiet dear, we’re on a ritual right now. We sense that there is a wandering ghost here in your room, that’s why you and your grandma passed out a while ago.” Mrs. Minatozaki explains, as she lights up another batch of candles to be arranged around Sana’s bed frame.

On the other hand, her dad is trying to suffocated her with tons of incense sticks he lit up inside her room. When she is about to nag her parents to stop them, she remembered her grandma.

“Wait— Where’s grandma? Is she okay?” Sana getting up on her bed, trying to avoid the candles to avoid her skin being burned by it.

“She’s at her room, resting. She’s fine, we already did a ritual on her room before we went here”

“Whatever” Sana rushes out of her bedroom, ditching the ritual to rush to her grandma’s room.

Sana did her best to open the door quietly as possible to prevent interrupting her grandma’s sleep but she failed. Grandma was anticipating on her one and only granddaughter to come to her room to apologize for making her worry and not fulfilling her promise of cooking something delicious for her.

“Sweetie, I’m really so—“

“Nooooo, it was fine. I’m okay and happy knowing that you’re fine already grandma” Sana holds her grandma’s hands. “That’s what only matters.” The older woman melted hearing the words coming from the sweetest and understandable young lady who deserves all the love in this world. Their night ended with Sana’s rants about her first day at school. She told her grandma how it to have judgmental classmates and wishing that school year will end fast so that she can request to be transferred to another section. Her grandma’s cheek was almost rip from smiling too much not because of the awful things her granddaughter experienced at school but she finds this moment priceless being with Sana listening to how her day went. They could stay in that moment like that for forever and both of them will not complain.

The next day, she woke up hearing her alarm on another room, Sana looked around and realized that she fell asleep next to her grandma. She tried to wake up her grandma, but she realized that she is not responding at all so tried again.

“Hey grandma, are you that tired listening to my rants last night that until now you’re still sleeping?”

Sana did not get any respond no matter how many times she tried to shake the shoulders of the older woman. Still no respond. Her eyes are starting to sweat not because of the heat but because of the mixed emotions she is feeling right now.

“Grandma, wake up!” Sana shouts.

“GRANDMAAAAA!”

It feels like déjàvu, she saw her dad started cussing again and her vision started to blur again.

Please let it be a dream.

Sana was not dreaming, since she is the one placing the ashes of her grandma on the altar at their living room next to her picture frame. Unlike her grandma, Sana is not religious but she picked three pieces of incense sticks and prayed for her dead soul hoping it is already in a better place.

“Grandma, it’s been a week. I already miss you, I hope you are not suffering anymore and already resting in peace. I love you.” Sana shed a tear but quickly wipes it before her parents arrived inside their house and quickly went to her room to continue to mourn over her grandma.

Months after the death of Grandma, Sana’s parents noticed that their daughter is not getting along well with them anymore. She never ate dinner together with them, always in her room. She only approaches her parents when there is document that needs their signs, aside from that they never hear Sana talking to them and always avoiding them. They thought that their daughter is still mourning over losing her grandma, but the truth is Sana despises her parents more than ever after her grandma disappeared. For the reason that Sana blames them responsible for her death.

“If only you send her to hospital that night and not proceeding with your bullcrap rituals, she would still be here with us. Alive and still taking care of me.” She always yelps in pain crying almost every night murmuring the same lines in her room blaming her parents. Blaming their bizarre job.

5 years later.

Sana does not celebrate birthdays anymore ever since her grandma died, but turning 20 is something that she is thankful for. She is already legal, that means that she can live independently and have opportunities to work. Sana is not bothered to finish college anymore. All she cares about is leaving her parents and starting new life alone. Sana is confident with this, since she already planned this 5 years ago. She made sure that she will have enough savings for this plan to push through. At first, she has thoughts to run away from them since she loathes her parents but she remembers her grandma’s teachings again and decided to tell them about her plans. She does not care for their approval because she not asking for it in the first place, all she needs to do is let them know as a respect.

Her parents tried to stop her, but she explained that she cannot live her life with them anymore. She also told them about why she was cold towards them for the past years. She clarified that she blames them responsible for her grandma’s death that she would still be alive if they only brought her to the hospital that night.

Sana left her parents speechless, realizing she have a point. They let her leave.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

On the airport, before she put her phone in airplane mode she received a text from her mom,  that made her annoyed. She has no plans opening the message but she already saw the preview of the text and she is already curious what her mom sent her.

[Mom]:

                We were too dumb to realize the reason why you got cold. We’re really sorry, for all the things that we’re lacking of as your parents. We promise to make it up to you, but not now. We’re going to give you the space that you need sweetie and I hope you’re going to give us a chance. Take care, wherever you are going and don’t skip meals. Love you.

At the sight of the text, all Sana did was to sigh.

Boarding to the plane, Sana took a deep breath and cleared up her mind.

“You need to leave all the bad memories behind here to start a new life in a new country. You can do it. You can do it Sana.” Sana encourages herself, eager to live a better life in a strange country.