I keep running until I reach his home. I was pleasantly surprised to come to an empty apartment. 
"Where are you Jinki?" I asked myself as I don't have the strength to speak or call his name. I' m having a cold feeling. I take out my phone and dial your number, but I can't reach you. I silently pray that you will answer your phone. I slowly sit to an empty chair in the dining area, looking around your empty apartment as my tears starting to appear in my eyes. In my mind, I pray that it's still not too late for me. 

"Hello, Kibum," I voice out trembling. "I'm here at Jinki's apartment but I can't find him. Do you even know where he is?" silently praying that he knows where you are. 
"Oh, I'm sorry Taemin but I don't where he is. We are all shocked when we come to work and learned that he resigned. He didn't come to work today either." Kibum simply responded to me. 

And after hearing that, I started crying. Where are you Jinki? Even though I felt like I can't move but I tried to stand up and look around your place. 
My heart is shattered in a million pieces and I don't know how to fix it. And then I saw the letter folded neatly on your side table together with our picture together. I slowly open it. 
and...

Dear Taemin,
How to start this, I honestly don't know how to start this. Yes, I am a coward, as I don't have the courage to face you and to talk things out. I can clearly remember how everything started between us, and I want to remember it without bitterness ad pain. 
Yes, I know that you've been seeing someone. I didn't talk about it, confront you, or even ask you about it because part of me wanted to fight and win you over silently. Part of me wants you to come forward and admit it. At first, I thought that I could keep it and just show you how much I Love You so that you'll never gonna come to look for him or crave for his touch. I was angry, but then I realize maybe I was not really the boyfriend you deserve. There is no point in arguing or even questioning why you did this to me because I acknowledge that I'm also guilty of not being a good boyfriend to you. I'm sorry for not being a good provider or for taking you for granted that you look for someone else. I thought I could accept it. I thought it would be okay to share you with someone else, silently fighting for you, but I can't. There is this point when I can't even look into your eyes, asking myself if you treat him like you are treating me. If the smile that you are giving to me is the same smile, you are giving to him. Looking at you, I can't help but wonder if you really enjoy my embrace, and I can't even erase the picture of you holding and kissing him fondly. And every time we make love, I slowly question myself if I really make you feel good or if you are also like that with him, and I realize I can't accept it. I just can't, I want you for myself, but I'm tired Tae. I'm tired of fighting for your affection and love. 
I'm letting you go because I know this will be best for both of us while I still have some respect for myself and to you. I don't want to come to a point where I will hurt you physically. I'm letting you go so that you don't have to choose, to feel guilty, for you to be free and have the free will to do everything you want. I don't want you to feel that I'm caging you. God knows how much I love you, and I will do everything for your happiness. I hope that you'll be happy with him. In time maybe I will have the courage to face you, and I hope that when that time happens all was healed. I will pray for your happiness and will silently cheer for you.

Always love you,
Jinki

In the deafening silence, I found myself in my fatal position holding to your letter like my life depends on it. It's true, you will never know the importance of the person after he is gone. I want to beg for your forgiveness because it's unbelievable as it may sound but you are the one I love Jinki. You are the one I chose and will always choose but now you are gone and I don't even know where to start. I cried and cried like there is no tomorrow. The love of my life is gone and I'm the one who pushes him away.
 

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well well, another story, at first I want this to be chaptered but I just settle in making it one shot since I don't know if I can keep up with the story.
I hope you will like it and you will still love me even if the story hurts you.
I know I still have an ongoing story and I will try to update it more often
Please leave your comments for me to know how is it just don't curse me. LOL