Minjoo’s phone fell flat on her face. She has been scrolling on her social media accounts for the past hour, and she already tried watching ASMR videos to try and make her fall asleep, but none of them was effective. She has been awake for twenty hours now, and it always take a lot of time before she falls asleep, only to wake up early the next day. It’s hard to normally function when a person is sleep deprived but Minjoo got accustomed to that kind of lifestyle now. But even though she lacks rest and slumber, she’s still clumsy either way.

Minjoo put her phone away and closed her eyes. She tried for the nth time to fall asleep; her routine every night, although she knows very well that won’t be take effect on her. Still, for her, they’re worth a try even when she knows that it’s pointless.

Unable to cradle into Hypnos’s arms, Minjoo sat down on her bed and wondered what to do next. She heaved a heavy sigh, for there’s literally nothing else for her to do but to wait for the sun to rise up again. She somehow feels thankful that she got through the week and that it’s almost weekend, because that’s the only time when she can stay in and possibly take naps in the afternoon. But she needs to get through Friday first.

While she was thinking, her phone received a notification and vibrated. Minjoo immediately got back from her trance and checked who messaged her on this ungodly hour. She wasn’t expecting anyone to do so because it’s a given that almost everyone she knows is already asleep, taking their respective rests from a tiring day at school, and some, from their part time job. But there are times when she hopes that maybe, just maybe, someone out there is also awake, like her.

Minjoo looked at the message and it was a simple, “Are you still up?” Nonetheless, Minjoo highly appreciated the thought of her friend, Chaewon.

Minjoo smiled to herself as she sent a message saying that she is completely awake. Minjoo doesn’t mind having company while she’s unable to fall asleep and besides, it has been awhile since Chaewon had learned about her state of living. It began when Chaewon noticed the younger who looked tired and not to mention, sleepless at school. Minjoo guesses that it couldn’t be helped since the two of them are seatmates; also, Chaewon asked the necessary questions and properly extracted information from the younger. Since then, there are random times when Chaewon suddenly pops up out of nowhere in the middle of the night and try to accompany her until the older, almost always, accidentally falls asleep. And sometimes, Minjoo would see her classmate being online at such ungodly hour and she takes it as her chance to strike a conversation with her. They’re both fine with talking to each other anyway.

As they continued to message each other tonight, Minjoo learned that Chaewon had another marathon of a recent hit drama series and also, she’s already halfway through when Chaewon looked up from her laptop to check the time. 

The longer they talk, the more Minjoo feels guilty that the older is still not sleeping right now. It has always been like this. The older would say in her replies that she’s not yet sleepy but her replies are having more typos than normal ones, and that’s when Minjoo knows that Chaewon is already being lullabied by Hypnos.

“May I call?” Chaewon felt like all of her drowsiness went away in an instant. She blinked and stared at Minjoo’s message for a while, her mind short circuiting and unable to think of a reply. She’s fine with them conversing like this, through texts and messages. However, she also realizes that her typos are getting worse by the second. She wanted to say no since she doesn’t really like talking on the phone but, she also doesn’t want to reject Minjoo’s offer. “Or maybe not.” Minjoo’s follow-up message read.

Well, it’s not like it’s the first time you had a phone call with Minjoo. Chaewon thinks as she took a deep breath, sat up and leaned against the wall. It’s just Minjoo. She repeated the mantra a few more times before taking another deep breathe as she tries to calm her frantically beating heart, but it doesn’t help that her hands are cold. She closed her eyes, tight shut, her thumb just a few millimeters away from the phone’s screen and from clicking the voice call sign. Damn it. If I’m gonna think of this, might as well just really do it.

“Hi?” Minjoo awkwardly greeted. Great greeting you have there, Minjoo. The conversation didn’t even start yet but it’s already going downhill. “I thought that you already fell asleep.” Minjoo said, high fiving herself inside her mind for being able to come up with a possible conversation starter, but at the same time face palming for realizing that it was a stupid thing to say, because if Chaewon did fell asleep, she wouldn’t be talking with her on the phone right now.

“I haven’t yet.” Chaewon croaked. “It’s just that,” Chaewon looked around her dimly lit room to find a plausible excuse she could use, just on time, a furry animal got on her bed. “My sister’s cat went up on me and invaded the entire bed.” Chaewon lied and exaggerated; it’s on her lap right now. She’s using her left hand to put her phone against her ear and the other to the cat’s back. She thinks that a little white lie wouldn’t hurt.

Thank heavens for this cat. Chaewon thought. On normal days, she’d get shock in the morning to see it sleeping next to her even when it’s not even her pet, and she’d blame herself too for not fully closing the door and letting the cat pass through, but this day not like any other.

“I never knew that you have a cat at your home.” Minjoo said with amusement evident in her voice. 

Chaewon lazily looked at the seemingly sleeping animal on her lap. “There’s still a lot for you to know about me.” Chaewon caressed its soft fur. For some unknown reason, they both fell silent with Chaewon remark. 

Chaewon coughed, “Anyway, are you still not going to sleep?”

Chaewon glanced at the digital clock on her nightstand. It read that it’s already three o’clock in the morning. She also realizes that they both have classes at 8, and it would be horrible for them if they continue to talk as if it’s already weekend.

Minjoo, by this time, already had the comfort of her soft mattress against her back. “Not until you sing me to sleep.” Minjoo dared as she plugged in wired earphones onto her phone.

Chaewon’s brows involuntarily furrowed. “Me? Sing?” Her voice a little loud that made the cat purr. To calm herself down, she touched the cat’s back.

“Yeah.” Minjoo’s fingers were crossed, hoping that the girl will really sing. She has heard her seatmate sing countless of times before and she bet that it’ll also be amazing through the phone.

“What if I won’t?” Chaewon asks, trying to push her luck. She has never really sung for anyone before. This is her first time to do it and she’s nervous.

“Then I won’t sleep.”

Chaewon doesn’t know what’s gotten into the younger but she doesn’t want her to go through the day without sleeping, even if it’ll be just a few hours of rest, she knows that it will deem itself to be useful in some way.

After a few moments of silence between them, Chaewon finally gave in, “Fine, I’ll sing you a song. But you have to promise me that you’ll try to fall asleep now, if possible.”

Minjoo whispered, “Yes, I promise.” Her voice was low and hoarse. 

Chaewon bit her lip and closed her eyes as she tries to remember a familiar tune. She knows tons of songs and has lots of it on her phone but, why did her knowledge of it suddenly went out the window now that she’s going to sing for Minjoo?

When a melody suddenly popped into her mind, she became worried that it wouldn’t fit the younger’s taste but hell, she doesn’t have time to change lyrics now.

You, you look like an angel

You look like an angel tonight

But I know I know that they lie

Saying the world spins on its side

‘Cause I am only aligned with your eyes.

Chaewon tried to keep her voice soft and mellow until the end of the song to make the younger possibly feel sleepy. By the time she finished, she called out for her friend, trying to find feedbacks however, what greeted her were sounds of a rather faint steady breathing.

Chaewon smiled to herself. She didn’t think that she’d be able to make her really cradle into Hypnos’s arms but she’s glad that she did. She kept it like that for a few more minutes, making her feel the silence of the wee hours of the morning but also fully aware that someone is on the other line, who just fell asleep. Chaewon snickered at her thought.

“Good night, Minjoo. Sleep well.” Chaewon softly whispered before deciding to end the call.

As much as she hated disturbing the sleeping cat on her lap, she needed to lay down on her bed now by moving. The cat left her alone now, and Chaewon, she had a smile on her face as she closed her eyes to spend the rest of the night on her dreamland.

---

“Have you told her yet?” Yujin said while casually snooping at her sister’s phone.

Chaewon immediately turned her phone off and glared at the person who just took the seat next to her. “No,” Chaewon’s voice was low and sounded down. “Not yet.”

Yujin turned the television on which is in front of them as she glanced at her sister. “When will you tell her?” Yujin’s voice was laced with both curiosity and judgment. “Or do you even have plans to tell her that?” 

Chaewon felt hurt that her not so little sister is making her see the truth, which she has long seen but still decides to turn a blind eye every time reality hits her that soon they’ll go to different universities and also probably, their separate ways.

“It’s been more than a year, Unnie.” Yujin narrowed her eyes. “And there’s still no progress between the two of you?”

Chaewon kept silent. She wanted to say her rebuttals but none came out. She knows very well that what her sister said is the truth and she’s very aware of the adage, ‘Truth hurts’ but she didn’t expect it to be like this.

A year of singing her to sleep, a year of Minjoo greeting her good morning with a lovely angelic smile on her face, a year of going home together, a year of spending lots of time with each other, and a year of hiding feelings from her.

Chaewon is highly conscious of the fact that the more they talk and spend time together, the more she likes and thinks of the younger. There are times when she would catch herself looking at her instead of the teacher in front and would lead to her being called to answer a question, which she fortunately knows. 

They’ve been close for so long that Chaewon wants to actually hold hands with her, not as a close friend but as a lover. They’ve already done so many things together, even got into each other’s rooms just to watch movies but none of them were brave enough to ask of what they are exactly. 

No one wanted to clarify their label; they just kept on going with the flow.

Chaewon is also afraid to admit to the younger what she feels. This all love thing is foreign to her, it’s her first time to feel the emotion and of all people, it’s towards Minjoo. And she just doesn’t want whatever it is that they have to shatter.

Chaewon heaved a heavy sigh. “What about you with her cousin? Any progress yet?” Chaewon asked with an eyebrow raised. She can’t possibly just sit there and get roasted by her sister.

Yujin averted her gaze. “Well,” Yujin scratched the back of her neck. “We’re friends,” Yujin was able to realize what her sister is currently doing. “But this is not about me, Unnie. This is about you. Let’s not get swayed here.”

The older suddenly regrets opening up to Yujin about this matter. But at the same time, she didn’t really opened up to her; she just woke up one day with her sister teasing her by nighttime, saying that she knows something about her and that Chaewon should tell her how did it start. Chaewon complied because she was held on blackmail; Yujin said that she’ll give Chaewon’s embarrassing childhood pictures to “her friend” if she won’t tell her. Chaewon was left with no other choice.

 “And you’re doing this because?” Chaewon queried.

Yujin glanced at her. “Because you’re almost done with high school and you still haven’t confessed yet.”

Chaewon rolled her eyes at the statement. “Do you have any suggestions? Do you have something that could help up on your sleeves?”

 Chaewon disliked the way she watched her sister look at her with narrow eyes partnered with a smile that feels like it’s up to no good. “Now that you’ve asked, I do have something to say.”

---

Minjoo can still feel the blood rush through her veins, her heartbeat pounding loudly in her ear. She can’t believe that she had actually sneaked out right after her curfew at home. Usually, she wouldn’t dare break rules but this is probably just the one time she’d choose to break it. She waited for everyone at their household to fall asleep before going to where Chaewon instructed her to go, to that park bench.

Minjoo put her hands inside the comfort of her black cocoon coat. She doesn’t know why Chaewon suddenly told her, while they were texting moments ago, to meet her by one o’clock in the morning at the bench they usually sit at after school, and it’s already fall for goodness sake. It’s rather cold out. She wanted to say no but all that she knows is that she needs to go, no matter what.

In all honesty, nervous is an understatement to what she’s feeling tonight. She even brought pepper spray just in case. From sneaking out to walking the streets alone late at night, the thought of suddenly disappearing without a fight scares her, but she kind of trusts the security given by the cops, but most of all, she trusts Chaewon for making her go out with this given time.

In no time, she safely arrived by the park bench and saw that Chaewon is already there. The nearby lamppost is working well and that’s why she was able to see Chaewon’s silhouette even from afar. Minjoo took her steps closer to her and made her presence known to the other.

“Hey.” Minjoo greeted.

Minjoo saw how Chaewon slowly glanced at her and smiled. She also saw how the older lightly tapped the space next to her, and Minjoo was more than glad to oblige to sit beside her.

The younger couldn’t read the older’s emotion right now. Spending time with her for more than a year made her get used to being teased by her seatmate more often than not, made her learn Chaewon’s preferences, especially to food. She got accustomed to the older so much that she’s bothered now with being clueless.

Minjoo looked up at the stars because apparently, her company is looking at everything but her. Minjoo saw the autumn night sky above them. She wanted to see the stars but she can’t due to light pollution.

She felt that someone is someone is staring and she tilted her head towards Chaewon. She immediately came face-to-face with Chaewon’s intense stare, only for the older to quickly avert her gaze. Minjoo watched her swing her leg to kick a pebble away from her.

“Minjoo~” Chaewon sweetly called, letting the name prettily roll off her tongue. “Have you ever been in love?” 

If Minjoo was eating the moment Chaewon asked, she’d probably choke. The question caught her off guard. They have never tackled this topic all this time; they kept it as is, which made her taken aback now that they’re actually going to talk about it.

“I-I don’t know.” Minjoo said, trying to test the treading waters. They immediately fell silent, “How about you, Chaewon-unnie? Have you ever been in love?” Although she already has an idea on the older’s answer.

“I guess,” Minjoo heard the older whisper. Spending a year with her made her learn that her ‘I guess’ is an equivalent to yes and hearing that made Minjoo’s heart sink. “I think it has always been right under my nose.” Her voice was low.

Minjoo got confused and didn’t realize she was staring until; Chaewon looked at Minjoo with that intense stare again. They held each other’s gazes for a while before started to lean towards her. Minjoo kept leaning back and it was then that Chaewon remarked, “Wait. Don’t move. There’s an eyelash on your face.”

Minjoo involuntarily closed her eyes as she waited for the other to remove the eyelash. She felt soft hands made contact against her skin. And soon, she felt that it’s safe for her to open her eyes again.

“Make a wish.” Chaewon said while holding the eyelash between her fingers. Chaewon watched as the girl clasped her hands and closed her eyes again. She wondered as to what she could be wishing for at that moment. Shortly, she felt the younger blow the eyelash away, completing the necessary steps. “What did you wish for?”

For the first time, she disliked the way she felt the cold autumn air hit against her tonight. She disliked the way the wee hours of the morning always make her feel more sober, more honest, and more into her feelings. And for the first time, she wanted to lie against the older but she blamed this hour of day for making her get into her emotions first rather than her mind. “You.”

Minjoo saw how Chaewon’s eyes finally register an emotion, but it was of shock, probably from the sudden confession. “I’ve always liked you all this time, you know. You have always been so sure of everything that you do and it’s one of the things I admire about you.” Minjoo averted her gaze.

“I’m sorry for being sudden and for this long overdue confession but, I just want you to know that I appreciate your existence a lot.” And sometimes I love to think that we’re more than just friends but I guess I’m already too late. Minjoo thought as her eyes were getting blurry, “Even though you already have someone in your heart.”

Minjoo turned away and looked up to prevent the tears from falling. She disliked the way she’s about to cry right now. She’ll probably never forget this cold autumn day, the day she experienced her first rejection. But at least, she was able to say her feelings towards her now.

“I like you too.” Chaewon said, almost a whisper.

Minjoo didn’t hear the words properly. What she heard was just some grumbles. “What?” She glanced at her friend once again.

Minjoo searched Chaewon’s eyes for emotions like, playfulness, mischievousness, cheekiness, and such but she found none. Instead, what she found was sincerity and saw most genuine brown orbs she’d ever seen in her entire life.  “I like you too.”

As if on cue, the tears started to fall.

Chaewon frantically moved to wipe the younger’s tears. “H-hey, why are you crying?” Chaewon panicked.

Minjoo didn’t speak a word but continued to cry. The moment the older said, she’s in love a while ago, Minjoo automatically thought that it’s towards someone else. She just couldn’t help but think of that especially when her seatmate had hinted that she likes somebody before. 

Unable to think of any other possible way to comfort the crying girl, Chaewon enveloped her inside her arms. “There, there,” Chaewon whispered as she caressed Minjoo’s hair. By the time Minjoo calmed down from crying, Chaewon lightly kissed her forehead. “I like you.” She proudly said making the other feel all warm, a contrast against tonight’s temperature.

Minjoo leaned away, breaking the hug, “Really?” Her brow slightly arched.

“Really.”

They spent some time just staring at each other’s orbs, casually listening to the symphonies of the crickets and other insects, to some engines of the cars that are going to who knows where, as they get lost inside their own universe.

“You have me, Minjoo.” Chaewon muttered. “You have me.”

They spent the rest of the night talking and enjoying each other’s presence. And just before the city and anyone in their respective households wake up, they both went home.

Minjoo was lying against the comfort of her bed. Scrolling down on her twitter just before she go to sleep and she saw Chaewon’s tweet that is captioned ‘With her’ and attached below is a picture of their shadows. As she closed her eyes to try and fall asleep, she thinks that this day is really unforgettable and that if this is love, she certainly doesn’t mind loving Chaewon.

---

Meanwhile…

“Do you think they’re together now?” Yujin quietly whispered. It’s almost dawn and she woke up even before her alarm went off, all because someone called her, disturbing her sleep.

“Maybe,” The person on the other line said in a shushed tone. “Wait, I just heard footsteps right now.”

“Can you go and check their SNS account? Preferably, Chaewon-unnie’s account because I know my cousin wouldn’t tweet stuff.” The person pleaded.

Yujin grabbed her glasses that was on top of her nightstand and moved to turn her laptop on. “On it.”

She kept on refreshing the twitter profile of her sister, waiting for any possible new tweet. Both on her public and private account, and almost immediately, there she saw it, her most recent tweet.

“Chaewon-unnie posted.” Yujin said as she heard the other person sigh.

“So now, Wonyoung, let’s go on a date?”