"Hey Jiwoo..."

 

Sooyoung found herself unable to formulate the next words. Why was this so hard? Why was she so scared? Well, the last one it's obvious: what if she said no. It would break her in a thousand pieces but most importantly it would ruin their whole relationship, and it would be Sooyoung's fault.

 

It had been over than ten years ago, but she could still remember crystal clear the day she met her.

 

Senior year was proving to be harsher than the previous ones. Not just by the amount of assignments she was given, the overly strict teachers, her parent's pressure to do well, the college entrance exams coming, but also the fact she was a loner.

 

Sooyoung had no friends, ㅡher mom would say it was because she didn't try hard enough which was not completely falseㅡ, she was your typical nerd with giant glasses, hair always tied up and that had nothing in particular that would make her stand out. She had learned how to endure the loneliness with the years so she thought it wouldn't affect her much. However, the last year of high school was proving to be a complete nightmare that she had to face all alone. Because she was a loser, because she wasn't as pretty as the other girls, because she wasn't as outspoken as her parents, because she wasn't interesting enough for people to care. It hurt but that was her reality.

 

She found solace in the only thing she was good at: dancing. That year she had finally pushed herself and decided to try for the dance team at her school. All her fears and anxiety were making her question why she was doing it on the first place, it was pointless she wouldn't gain anything from it.

 

She didn't listen tho and soon enough, she was standing on the gym ready for the try-outs, maybe not exactly ready.

 

"HaSooyoung." She heard her name being called after the third girl's audition.

 

She bowed deeply in front of the people who would be her judges; she knew them, of course she did, everyone did: they were barely freshmen and sophomores but they had gained an insane amount of popularity in the moment they had put their feet in high school.

 

"A senior?" One of them scoffed in disbelief. She was right tho, normally seniors didn't apply for any clubs or extra-curricular activities because they were probably already part of them or they had enough with school itself. Another weird thing she was doing.

 

She felt the hard stares on her making her gaze even more interested in the floor. She wanted to dig a hole under her feet and disappear.

 

"Shh Hyejoo-yah..." Another girl shushed the raven haired with a bored face. "Please, feel free to choose any song you want, sunbaenim." Kim Jungeun, aka the dance team captain, said pointing towards the iPod connected to the speakers.

 

She nodded and hurried to grab the device. Her hands were already sweaty and she felt the urge to sprint out of the place. She luckily didn't tho. Sooyoung settled for a song by TheWeekend, took her glasses off, and as it started she sighed trying to calm down and let herself be guided by the rhythm.

 

She had choreographed the song prior to the audition since she didn't really like to improvise. Therefore, it wasn't a surprise that she nailed every single movement. She swung from sharp movements to slow ones following the beat and vibe of the song. She was also looking at the girls in the jury quite more confidently, she wasn't afraid of them anymore, this was her territory. The song ended and so did her courage. She bowed and fixed her gaze on the floor once again.

 

"Give us a second, sunbaenim." Kim Jungeun uttered as she went back to discuss with the other three girls who accompanied her.

 

Five minutes passed. The people in queue for the auditions were boring holes in Sooyoung's skull. None of the previous girls had taken so long to get rejected. Meanwhile, she just shuffled her feet in awkwardness.

 

"It was almost unanimous. HaSooyoung sunbaenim, welcome to dance team!" The brunette in front of her said making Sooyoung snap her head back up and widen her eyes seeing the latter flashing a smile to her just like the rest of the girls except for SonHyejoo who just rolled her eyes and huffed. She knew what ‘almost unanimous’ stood for now.

 

She did it. Finally, she could say it she had accomplished something in high school more than good grades. Her mom surely wouldn't be too pleased tho.

 

She bowed a last time and thank them before making her way out and heading in a flash and heading to the lockers to change.

 

As she slipped her shirt on, she got the worst scare of her life, almost tripping over a bench.

 

"You are amazing!" She heard and flinched at the voice tone.

 

Sooyoung took deep breaths with a hand on her chest. There was no one there when she had gotten in. Was it a ghost?

 

"Oopsy, didn't mean to scare you." Sooyoung looked up to see a redhead with an apologetic smile on her face, her breath hitched. It couldn't be happening. "I just saw your audition and was wowed away!" The girl said clapping her hands as her grin grew wider. Sooyoung had never seen a brighter smile.

 

"Th-thanks." She stammered and looked down not wanting to stare too much. Perfect, she'll think you are an idiot.

 

"Oh and you forgot these!" She was handled back her glasses. That explained why she was seeing everything a bit blurry. What a , she thought bowing her head in gratitude. She put them back on and made the mistake of looking up. She is so beautiful.

 

"I'm KimJiwoo by the way!" The redhead voiced bowing down fleetingly. "I'm also on the dance team, but Jungeun-ah won't let me be a judge because she said I'm too nice and would let everybody pass, which it's not true, entirely and..." She went on a ramble but Sooyoung was just dumbfounded listening to muffled sounds.

 

Of course she knew who KimJiwoo was. She was a social butterfly, every single person at school loved Jiwoo, they wanted to either be like her or be with her, because besides being a total sweetheart with no a pinch of evil and as bright as the sun itself, she was stunningly gorgeous and dreadfully cute. She was also extremely talented since she was the leader of the school chorus, ㅡSooyoung had heard the latter sang a few times at school events she was forced to go to, amazed it's not even a description of what she felt after seeing her performedㅡ, and was also in the dance team, the debate team; she even was class president for goodness sake.

 

But most importantly, she was sparing more than a word to a nobody like Sooyoung. Why? Was it kindness? Was it pity? Until now she still wonders. She couldn't be more grateful she did it tho.

 

Jiwoo spoke to her every time she saw the taller girl around and step by step she managed to climb Sooyoung's walls becoming not just her one and only friend but also her best friend. The person she would tell all the things that troubled her mind, that she would share her insecurities and allow herself to be vulnerable with.

 

The year ended quickly and Sooyoung began to get busier with college so she couldn't hang with the redhead as much as she would have like to, however, their connection just grew stronger then. Sooyoung would wait impatiently for every Sunday to see the latter; they would just do simple things like watch a movie or go out to a picnic, but it never failed to let Sooyoung with a big grin on her face. She didn’t know it back then, but she was falling head over heels for Jiwoo.

 

It was her second year at university, when it happened. Sooyoung wasn't still that much of a nerd, she had had an amazing glow-up, ㅡfinally her mother would be a bit prouderㅡ, for once in her life, she dressed more fashionable, she had also decided to let her thick glasses behind and replaced them with contact lenses, and the fact she continued practicing dance in her free-time had maintained her fairly fit. Personality wise, things had changed too, she wasn't around her parents anymore which meant she didn't have to be reminded of every little thing she did was wrong or that she was always lacking, and even if she wasn't aware of it, Jiwoo had helped her a lot with her insecurities; the girl was a flirt and she continually repeated how special and beautiful she was, and maybe Sooyoung occasionally believed her.

 

There was a party being thrown on Saturday after the first week of classes, in order to receive the new students but pretty much everyone assisted, a party is a party. Obviously, last year Sooyoung had refused to go, she wasn't keen on parties, even tho, she had never been to one before and her knowledge was purely based on movies. On her second year, she couldn't denied tho since her new friends,ㅡa pair of foreigner girls that had come to study to Koreaㅡ, had literally pushed her to go.

 

She never thought it would happen.

 

She had dressed casually but still looked nice or hot as her roommate and one of the friends named above would say. "Done." The latter uttered as she finished applying her own makeup.

 

"We'll be late, Lalisa..." Sooyoung huffed looking at her watch. She had been ready for twenty minutes now.

 

"Yah HaSooyoung, you can never be late to a party! Besides as they say in England: The Queen is never late, the rest is just early." The slightly taller girl said sparing one last look to herself in the mirror before turning around with a smudge smile on her face.

 

They hurried to wherever the event was taking place at. Or more like, Sooyoung half-walked half-ran while dragging her friend behind her, not caring to hear the girl's protests because she was wearing high heels.

 

When they arrived the crowd of people was giant; there were people in and outside the salon, and the music blasted through the windows. Yep, she was right about parties, it looked exactly just like she imagined, or dreaded.

 

"Come on, Chaeyoung-ah is waiting for us in the back, her stupid boyfriend dumped her... As expected." Now it was Sooyoung the one being dragged, her fingers were being crashed by the strong grip. Lisa always got mad at the mention of her other friend's boyfriend, Sooyoung knew why but didn't dare to say anything, instead she just smirked mischievously as she followed her.

 

Chaeyoung was emptying her third cup of whatever booze she had found when she saw her friends approaching and waved at them to call their attention.

 

"Hi!" She said and giggled like a little kid.

 

"Already Chaeyoung-ah? How many of these did you drink?" Lalisa was frowning while taking the cup from her whining best friend.

 

"A few, dunno." The girl with pink-ish hair mumbled shyly, she didn't want to get scold.

 

Sooyoung watched them interact amusingly. Those two were such a pair, one never knew what to expect.

 

"You know who is needing some alcohol to stop being such a prude and get the stick out of her ." Lalisa spun on her heels and signaled a bored looking Sooyoung who turned her head and shot her a glare clearly offended. "I was kidding... Or not." She whispered the last part but Sooyoung heard and rolled her eyes taking the cup out of the girl's hand.

 

She was going to do what she had been doing for the past two years. Try, even if she was scared, before deciding what was good and what wasn't. She was done with being the shy girl who never experienced anything and lived inside a bubble. And under that mantra, she emptied the cup filled with soju in one go, slightly disgusted by the taste of it and the fact seemed on fire for a couple seconds.

 

Half an hour later she was playing beer pong with some guys and literally dancing on top of some tables with Lisa. She was having more fun that she had ever had in her whole 21 years. The fun didn't last too long tho.

 

She decided to take a break and head to the bathroom to meet her needs. But as she was about to pushed the door opened, an imaginary light bulb . She turned her head towards the path where she had come from. A few steps away, she saw it. Her.

 

"Jiwoo? KimJiwoo?" She called fully turning around. For some reason her blood was boiling, she felt the strange need to punch the wall next to her.

 

The redhead heard her name being called and opened her eyes snapping her head towards the familiar voice. Her face grew pale at her best friend scowling. Oh oh. She pushed the guy who kept kissing her collarbone nonchalantly off her, and giggled nervously.

 

"H-hi unnie!" Jiwoo said awkwardly. The tension could have been cut with a cold knife.

 

"We were in the middle of something here, prissy, get going." A boy who looked like every stereotype of boy uttered quite annoyed at the interruption. He thought he was about to score tonight.

 

"Namisa, nom.ㅡ it's none of your business, ㅡ Get lost." Sooyoung answered trough gritted teeth and clenched fists.

 

"What did you just said ?" He had fire in his eyes as he stepped closer to a short haired who he would surely have hit on if she wasn't such a pain in the .

 

However, Sooyoung had the same fire on her eyes and now she didn't want to punch the wall anymore, instead she would be pleased to connect her fist with the guy's jaw. If it wasn't because Jiwoo took a hold of her wrist, excused both of them and dragged her inside the bathroom. The boy just cursed and walked away. "She wasn't that pretty anyways."

 

The redhead locked the door after them and turned around slowly. She knew there was a minimal chance to encounter Sooyoung between the crowd because she didn't go to parties and because the place was huge and filled with people. But there she was, inside a stinky bathroom with the latter digging holes in her head after she had interrupted whatever Jiwoo was doing. The redhead had to admit she was also getting pissed.

 

"What are you doing, Sooyoung?" She muttered with her arms folded.  Sooyoung was taken back by her low tone and the fact she was being called out so informally. She had never seen Jiwoo this way before. She wouldn't back off tho.

 

"What are you doing, Jiwoo? What are you even doing here to begin with?" Sooyoung questioned taking a step forward trying to look threatening. Jiwoo wasn't threatened at all tho, but grew angrier instead.

 

"I could ask the same thing about you. You never go to parties." She stated tapping the latter's chest in reproach.

 

"And you do? You're not old enough to drink either." Sooyoung didn't know why she was being so pushy or what was the reason behind her anger, she just felt like she was about to explode.

 

"So what? It's my business." Jiwoo shrugged unbothered and stared back at the taller's eyes. What was going on?

 

"I see, so you go around drinking and kissing whatever gets in your sight. How nice!" The short haired rolled her eyes and huffed in frustration. She didn't know this Jiwoo at all. It's true she hadn't seen the girl for a few months now, since she had spent summer break at Busan with her grandparents, but still this was a 180° turn in her persona.

 

"Yeah, you are right." Sooyoung did not expect it at all, she didn't expect being pulled by the collar of her pink shirt and her lips suddenly being smashed against soft ones. The tension banished, her anger faded, her heart pounded hard in her chest and her hands trembled at her sides. It didn't last tho because Jiwoo backed away and flashed her a glare as she spoke to a dumbfounded Sooyoung. "I do go around kissing s. ." The redhead finished as she her heels to leave.

 

She could not make one step forward when she found herself being spun around by a pair of hands on her waist and then trapped against the door. Sooyoung had her face a few inches from her, Jiwoo's breath hitched in anticipation, eyes glued on her plump lips.

 

"So I'm an , huh?" Sooyoung didn't recognize her own voice in that sultry tone. She wasn't thinking, but there was something telling her it didn't matter. Jiwoo just hummed being unable to speak without stammering. "But I bet I’m better than him..." Sooyoung stated in cockiness before her next move.

 

She captured Jiwoo's lips in hunger, it wasn't a peck like the previous one. This was a much needed kiss, a kiss that screamed loudly hundreds of unspoken words.

 

Jiwoo closed her eyes, the taller was right she was better than him, ten thousand times better because her stomach hadn't twitched in excitement like that before, neither her heart had felt like it was going to burst out, or his lips had seemed magnetic as Sooyoung's. She wanted that feeling to never end as she felt the latter's hands on her lower back and her own buried in brunette locks trying to eliminate any space between their bodies.

 

Yes, their first kiss was in a bathroom, with both of them partly drunk, in the heat of the moment, and with lots of jealousy involved. But none of them would ever forget it. It was the inflection point in their relationship.

 

Instead of breaking their friendship, it showed them they were beyond that. And suddenly, their Sunday's get-togethers became Sunday's dates. Suddenly, Sooyoung found her head wondering every two minutes about a certain redhead: was is Jiwoo doing? Was she sleeping well? Had she already eaten? Suddenly their texts had gotten more and more cheesy, however, it didn't make Sooyoung cringed as it probably would have before. Suddenly, Sooyoung was happy.

 

And Jiwoo was happier too,ㅡto the point Hyejoo had asked her if she wasn't on some drug, Jungeun had scolded the latter but also made the same questionㅡ. She would walk around school with a smile from ear to ear and sighing dreamingly every single Monday morning. Their friends were growing preoccupied until she told them there was something going on with Sooyoung; since then, they didn't stop teasing her, but also supporting and rooting for both of them.

 

The time passed until Jiwoo first day at the same university Sooyoung attended to, arrived. The short haired had found out which was going to be Jiwoo's room and bribed her roommate to let her in and leave them alone, wanting to surprise the redhead.

 

Jiwoo got out of the car waving her dad goodbye and headed to the students’ admissions office where she was assigned her dormitory.  She headed straight there, a bit bummed Sooyoung hadn't showed up to receive her or at least guide her through the immense campus. Also a little nervous to know whoever her roommate was going to be. She dialed the password at the door and opened it just to drop her luggage from her hands right after.

 

"Surprise!" Sooyoung exclaimed shyly with a bouquet of roses in her hands. "I wanted to surprise you but I should have just waited for you at the entrance. Sorry, I..." She started to babble but was cut off by a body crushing against her. Soft pecks were placed all over her face even on her lips, and the blush quickly crept onto her cheeks.

 

"You're amazing." Jiwoo whispered snuggling into the taller's neck. She could feel Sooyoung's quick heartbeats against her chest. She loved it. She loved her. "Unnie... Be my girlfriend." She mumbled with her voice muffled.

 

"Wh-what?" Sooyoung asked, she thought she was hearing things.

 

Jiwoo, on the other hand, assumed she had made a mistake and broke their embrace looking down at the floor embarrassingly.

 

"Nothing." She whispered not knowing what else to do.

 

"No Jiwoo, what did you just say?" Sooyoung pushed further. She wanted to hear it.

 

"Forget it, unnie, please~" The redhead pleaded on the edge of tears. Why did she have to ruin it?

 

Sooyoung got closer but Jiwoo just kept trying to escape so the latter couldn't see the tears pooling in her eyes. She was such an idiot for thinking Sooyoung would agree to such a thing. Maybe she was wrong tho.

 

"No, I won't Chuu." The taller said grabbing her chin and lifting it, in order to get the redhead to look into her eyes. Sooyoung heart sank at the sight: Jiwoo's eyes were glossy, tears dripped from them, and was pouting like a baby penguin. She was quick to kiss away her tears and place a longer kiss on the younger's forehead as she enveloped her in a loving hug.

 

"I won't forget it because I want to and I am your girlfriend." Sooyoung stated firmly and felt the girl in her arms sobbing. She left a chaste peck on the top of her hair and sensed her eyes watering too. It was all too much. Too many emotions.

 

"I love you, Sooyoung..." Jiwoo said bringing her eyes up to the short haired's and sniffling. She must have look so pathetic. Although, she didn't in Sooyoung's orbs, whose heart melted at the words.

 

"I love you Chuu..." She answered in English making a pun with her alias. They both giggled between tears and stared at each other for a while, until the door opened and someone barged in.

 

"Uh, s-sorry! I forgot my airpods hehe." A girl said as she hurried to grab the earphones from under her pillow nervously. She should have knocked, she scolded herself mentally.

 

"I want half of my money back KimYerim-ssi." Sooyoung yelled as the girl closed the door.

 

"You wish!" She heard her voice getting further. The short haired rolled her eyes and gazed down to Jiwoo who had a thoughtful expression.

 

"A hundred wons for your thoughts?" She asked caressing her cheek delicately to bring the girl down to earth again.

 

"Do you mean it?" Jiwoo questioned in hesitation daring to get lost in the brownish orbs, she knew the answer by the meaningful look in them. She could see it. "Do you love me?"

 

Sooyoung didn't answer tho. Not verbally at least. She gently placed her lips on Jiwoo's not moving for a second until the redhead did. This time, the kiss wasn't a hungry, but a loving one.  They didn't need to rush, they didn't need the aggression, it wasn't a need. But a display of pure affection. So, it was slow and they took their time with it.

 

Jiwoo opened granting permission for Sooyoung's tongue to intertwine with hers. Moments afterwards, she was taking her shirt off.

 

"Are you sure?" Sooyoung asked stopping her motions to stare into the redhead's eyes and reassure her she was okay with whatever the latter decided. Nevertheless, Jiwoo nodded, she had no doubts, she loved Sooyoung and Sooyoung loved her, it was right. It was the first time for both of them but none of them cared about that, because it felt right.

 

Sooyoung ended up graduating with a business major to please her parents' wishes, which proved to be pointless as they gave an ultimatum as soon as they found about their daughter's 'deviousness'. Either she broke up with Jiwoo and married one of her father's company investors' sons, or else she would be disowned. Her heart shattered in pieces, nevertheless, she didn't hesitate in saying her last goodbyes to her parents. She had left her hopes and dreams of being a dancer aside to become what they wanted her to be, but she wasn't about to abandon the only sparkle in her life. Jiwoo had always told her she should forgive them, that they were just laid back and ignorant, but Sooyoung never did, she wasn’t going to accept being shamed by who she was or who she loved ever again. And at the end of the day, she was finally free.

 

Jiwoo, in the opposite, pursued the career of her dream and became a Music and Arts teacher. Her parents were quite accepting about both girls’ relationship and treated Soyoung like their own daughter.

 

And so the years passed until this moment.

 

"Unnie you're scaring me..." Jiwoo voiced as she saw the older’s eyes looking right through her, lost in space. The woman had kept quiet for the last five minutes and the redhead was getting concerned. She didn't want to assume the worst because she was an optimistic person but Sooyoung was making her iffy.

 

The now long haired brunette blinked a couple times and smiled again. She opened trying to find the right words. Come on, Sooyoung! You've been planning this for ages.

 

It was true. She had been organizing this night for over a month.

 

A few weeks ago, she had called Jungeun and asked her to meet up. They had grown to be quite close friends actually. Since they were in the same dance team during high school and were friends of the overly cheery redhead it was a matter of time before they warmed up with each other. However, the day Jungeun showed up at her dorm’s door after Jiwoo told her about their ‘relationship’ or whatever was developing at the time,  ㅡshe might or might not have warned Sooyoung not-so-nicely she would snap every bone in her slender figure if the latter dared to break her best friend's heart, Sooyoung had heavily agreed and promised not to do it, at least in purpose or with that intentionㅡ, that was the day she gained a newfound respect for the girl. She could see Jungeun was genuine and loyal, she wouldn’t want nothing less for Jiwoo.

 

“Remind me again why I’m meeting you at this café at 6 in the morning?” Th