How I love you.

Here's my story of how I met and fall in love with Yujin.

I'm on my way to a fan meeting mini live of IZONE. It's surreal since it'll be my first time coming to a japanese live and the good thing is that I'll be meeting my fellow IZCORDFAM.

I've been wanting to meet them but i couldn't because my mom wouldn't let me and saying that they probably have intention and i may get into trouble or accident if i do. But anyways. My parents agreed on me meeting Eunbi unnie and other IZCORDFAM and i was really happy.

Once I got into IZMALL, I instantly went on the line and found Yena and the others. It was my first time meeting them and I highly doubt that they will recognize me just by my face so i guess i have to introduce myself.

Once I found them I excitedly waved at Yena and to the others. To my excitement I bumped into someone, stepped on her foot and bumped her body. I didn't know who she was and I've just seen her in a previous photo in every meetup they do.

I apologized to her because I was so giddy and apologetic. Then, we introduced ourselves and that time around she said she was Yujin.

After sometime the IZONE event was about to start and all fans were constantly entering the area. I then found Eunbi unnie in the corner of the event area together with Chaeyeon unnie and Sakura unnie in IZCORDFAM.

The event was fun and enjoyable even though i don't know who these people are except Eunbi unnie. After the event, I went to search for Yena and the others before I went home. Since my brother and I agreed on going home after the event.

I was saddened when I only found Yena and Chaeyeon unnie. I then bid farewell and hoped I would get to see them soon.

#TIMESKIP#

It's the official day of my first meetup in IZCORDFAM! I was so happy when my mom finally agreed on me going out for fanmeets and I got to go anywhere.

'Yes freedom!' that was i thought.

I went to a mall just a train away from my home and got there before the meetup and the japanese something event started.

I found Yujin wearing a cap and Yena talking to each other. Then I joined them in their random conversation. After waiting for the others to finally arrive. Chaeyeon unnie suggested that we go to the other mall and eat there since the mall we are in right now is pretty much expensive and there's no fast food restaurant in it.

After somewhile, we got into the mall and we got to know each other. I vaguely remember everything but it was enjoyable.

--

Time went by, Yujin and I became close to each other and in every meetup we sat together and talked to each other. Even in our chats. We enjoy each other's company. It was in my thoughts but I hoped that she was too.

Months of getting to know each other I got this weird feeling where I found myself getting amused and butterflies over my stomach everytime i saw her and talked to her.

I don't even know about myself but one thing for sure. I'm building feelings for her. I mean I'm liking her to the point that I'm confused.

I got to know her, she got to know me and we  kept on meeting each other in every possible way. Like we got this connection and whenever one wants to see the other and if I'm depressed or whatever, she goes to me and convinces me to think positive and she even tries to cheer me up in every possible way.

I think i came to like her because she's this caring and she's a wonderful person once you get to know her. She may look serious but funny and hyper all the time but she is who she is.

--

#TIMESKIPS#

Until that day when we decided to go to the mall near my school and sing on a Karaoke bar just for our time to pass by.

Then that day.

I sang a song to her how I felt and we dared each other. It's a kiss dare.

It's a quick random but it's also the anchor in which I got the guts to ask her out.

Kim Minjoo, why do you have so much guts in just one peck on her lips?

My mind was exploding that time but I got to really confess to her. It was like a Speedy conversation where i- i asked her to be my girlfriend and I couldn't express more and I feel so anxious about what she's going to say.

I think she was dumbfounded by what I said but to my surprise, Yujin said yes and yes we became a couple in that moment.

Which made every Karaoke time memorable.

--

We became a good couple. We even told Eunbi unnie and Chaeyeon unnie about us and for months in relationship we became good girlfriends even if it's their ups and downs and conflicts between us. We still forgive and say what we feel to each other.

Yes, it was fun.. having Yujin as a girlfriend and i was really thankful that she accepted me.

Not until that time before our monthsary..

She decided to break up with me because of an important reason which I understand deeply. I can't tell you! It's a secret.

I just feel bad and feel like I'm crying and feel my world is crumbling at that time. I tried to stay brave and not look like a dumb chick who got rejected. I did my best, didn't i?

But my love is still there... Yes, we stayed friends. Meet each other, talk to each other like our past relationship never happened.

I promised to her that I will wait for her till she decides to come back. I really did for almost a year. I felt like giving up because i felt like a dumb person who is waiting for no one and just air.. even though i know that she also has feelings to me still. But...i sometimes feel like really giving up.

I cried overtime, everyday and Everytime i remenber how stupid I'm in love with Yujin.

I'm stupidly in love with her that I couldn't feel it for the other people I knew. I just know that I love her so much and that's it.

--

One time I went with my friend(s) to watch Star Wars but sadly the others couldn't come and I and him were the only people who got to watch Star Wars that day.

I lied to her that I'm with my friends which I regretted the whole day. She then found out that i was only with my one friend to watch Star wars which i regretted more than ever.

I feel horrible for lying and my mood was taken aback. My friend, Wonyo, asked me why I had a dry face. I told him about everything and he told me that to face it and make up with her.

What makes him an amazing person is because he is also caring. He knows my secrets too. He is an amazing friend who understands me and how I deal with her. He also knows how I feel about Yujin too. For real though, I always talk about Yujin to him non-stop so he knows how I really feel about Yujin. He is just a friend who is also a broken hearted. I feel bad for you Wonyo.

--

#TIMESKIPS#

Ah... Timeskips but I'm just summarizing how Yujin and I became girlfriends again.

--

The lockdown and the Coronavirus . I have to stay in the house for 2 months now. It's near 25th of June, our supposed to be Monthsary.

I was talking loudly in our IZCORDFAM and talking to my friends there.

On the 24th of near 25th of June at 12:00 it's the day Yujin confessed to me.

She was busy voting for IZONE and I was busy doing stuff and chatting with our IZCORD and she chatted with me that she was voting.

I told her to "Vote well" and she responded with "I'm doing a survey" so I told her to "Answer well."

She then replied.

"Answer me too."

I was dumbfounded by what she was saying so I sent a lot of question marks.

And then she told me that she was waiting for the day for us to meet each other personally again before she asked something.

But Yujin was getting paranoid and feeling anxious. I just feel her anxiousness.

I keep waiting for her to finish typing but it takes minutes before she sends it to me..

She then confessed how she feels, how she gets paranoid and feeling isolated because i wasn't able to talk to her properly. She feels like it's too late and wasn't able to ask the question she has been wanting to ask.

She was planning on saying her confession to me before the lockdown but the Virus happened. She has no other choice.

She said to me these words that melted my heart and made me cry that I couldn't bring myself on replying fast.

"I decided to ask you before the pandemic happened but i wasn't expecting for this to happen. I've been wanting to do this in a romantic way but i don't know how to do this . And lately I'm getting paranoid that I'm thinking that it's probably too late. But..

Minjoo, I want to be with you again. I want you to be mine again."

She chatted with me. It's really not a romantic way. Asking a person in a chat is pretty much the goofiest move but what can I do. I love her.

Also, lame moves like this..

"You will make me the happiest person the world(...)" I'm not gonna continue what she said because it's funny but at the same time my heart fluttered because of it. Yujin really makes my heart flutter even in these kinds of phrases. She even added a pleading face. Awee..

I replied to her about what I felt and I apologized to her if she ever felt paranoid because of me.

Then the conversation went on and yes, I told her a Yes. That was the happiest time of my current life right now.

She wanted to prove herself in hundred percent in how much she loves me and not wanting to leave me again.

She did leave me once and she is the one who broke up with me. But all i did was to wait.

I guess the waiting game is over, huh.

And now my story will end here because this story of mine is weird. But one thing for sure..

I love Ahn Yujin even for random things, conflicts and I don't really know what's happening and nothing makes sense.

I, Kim Minjoo love her very much and will always be.