I parked in my usual spot when I arrived in school early morning for our first period class. Jongdae, who usually rides with me, got out of the car right after I turned off the engine. I pulled the key from the ignition and gathered my things before I got out. Just when I closed the door and pushed the button to lock it, Jongdae crept behind me and whispered, “Seojeen is sitting in her usual place.”

My head snapped up to the spot where I know she would be. There I saw Seojeen, sitting on a wooden bench under the Kwanzan Cherry Tree reading a book. Every morning whenever she comes early to school, she would read a book as her pastime. I leaned back on the hood of my car as I watched her from afar.

Jongdae leaned on the hood beside me crossing his arms, “What’s going on with you lately? You two were always together, but now-” He noticed our distance so without dropping my gaze at Seojeen, I answered immediately not allowing him to come up with any unnecessary guesses, “Nothing, we're both just busy.”

I didn’t mention a word to Jongdae about the confession thing.

That day, I was dumbstrucked by her sudden confession that I rejected her that instant. It’s not like we made a promise that bestfriend’s shouldn’t fall in love with each other. It's just that it never crossed my mind that either one of us would fall in love with the other. Due to awkwardness, I avoided her everytime I see her coming or avoid her eyes whenever she looks at me. Next thing I knew, she was avoiding me as well.

Right now, she was wearing a deep blue buttoned polo shirt loosely tucked in her jeans. The shade from the sun plus the contrast of the pink Cherry tree and her deep blue polo shirt set her skin off perfectly making it look like fresh cream. The wind blew her long silky black hair covering the left side of her face cutting my view from where I stood. She gathered her hair and tucked it on her right shoulder exposing the arch of her slender neck. The way she held her head, leaned slightly on the right was very graceful. She looked so serene and lovely.

She laughed while reading her book, probably read something funny. Looking at Seojeen, she has the most beautiful smile among the girls here in school.

Once, I saw her with her friends in the cafeteria laughing, like she had already forgotten all that had happened to us. I couldn’t help but miss her company and be bitter to those she was having a good time with.

Jealous?

I was never jealous of her friends before because… I never cared about it… because I know that in the end, all of Seojeen’s time and attention will come back to me.

I have never bothered once about Seojeen's beauty. I mean, of course, my bestfriend is beautiful but that’s just it, no other special feelings.

This time, when I thought she was beautiful, there was this special feeling I felt, same feeling when I’m attracted to a girl.

I am not sure of what it is but all I know is that it came into existence the day we were distant from each other.

Out of nowhere, a tall guy with average looks stood himself in front of Seojeen. He handed her something, a paper, though I couldn’t see it clearly, which Seojeen gladly took and smiled when he left.

That instant, my hands balled into fist and felt an urge to storm my way to Seojeen and ask what that guy just gave her. Usually, I don’t mind guys confessing and declaring their admiration to Seojeen but of course, these guys has to get through to me first before they could even touch Seojeen’s hands.

Protective, aren’t I? Of course, she’s my bestfriend… she’s special.

Special...

Jongdae placed his hand on my shoulder, “Dude, c’mon, we’ll be late,” and dragged me by the arm breaking my view of Seojeen.

My mind was not in class and as a proof, Professor Kang called my name and asked me a question, which of course I didn’t know the answer as I wasn’t listening, instead called another student as to who knows the answer. Jongdae, who is seated beside me, looked at me with what-is-wrong-with-you? eyes. I just shrugged my shoulders and rested my chin in my hands as I stared out the window.

During lunch break, Seojeen and that crap piece of paper have been bothering me until I couldn’t enjoy the food I was eating. Why am I so worked up with just a piece of paper when it could just mean nothing? Right, it could be anything; a note, a homework, a schedule, an address, a name, a contact number, a LOVE CONFESSION! NO! ! What am I thinking?

After lunch, I hid myself inside the car to rest but the image of Seojeen and the paper would always pop up. Unconsciously, I took out my phone and went for the dial keypad. Seojeen’s number is in my speed dial #3, but to make the process longer, I chose to open the phonebook and scanned down through the names until I got to hers. My heart skipped a bit.

So, I’ve been staring at her number like forever, my thumb centimeters away from the dial option on the screen, stiffened in place. My courage plummeted when nervousness got over me. I dropped the phone on the seat, leaned my head at the headrest and took a deep breath and exhaled.

I just realized then that I didn’t have a plan at all. What would I tell her if she picks up? Would I ask her about the guy who just gave her the note? Am I going to talk to her now after all those times avoiding and not talking to her? She must’ve hated me right now and would probably not like to talk to me. So, yeah, I’m a coward. I took my cellphone, placed it back in my pocket and got out of the car to get to my next class.

Ji Ho, Minwoo, Jongdae, and I together with their new friend whose name I don’t remember were walking on the hall on our way to the parking lot. The guys were talking about girls and believe me, the new guy is such a loudmouth which is so annoying. He was prattling about the girls he had dated; the beautiful, the famous, and the y. His nonsense talk was not that interesting to me so I didn’t join in and walked ahead in silence.

“Seojeen is looking good today,” commended by someone whose voice I could not pinpoint. That caught my attention and I quickly raised my head to look for her. There I saw her, walking alone in the field, probably going home. Again, this time, I’m sure of whose voice it is as he propounded, “She doesn’t have a boyfriend, right? She’s my type. How about if I go and introduce myself to her?”

My eyes widened and I immediately turned towards the guy and grabbed him by the collar, knocking him on the pillar behind him. I asked him in a restrained tone, “What did you say? I must have heard mistakenly.”

Ji Ho and Minwoo quickly rooted themselves on my side grabbing both of my arms in the hopes of letting their new friend go, which I didn’t budge. He was appalled by my sudden fit and choked when he asked, “W-What the… S-Something wrong?”

Jongdae who didn’t interfere apprehended him, “Dude, be careful of what you say next time. You see, Seojeen is Joonmyun's bestfriend.”

The guy scrutinized me and scoffed, “Why are you so angry when you are just besties?”

This moron still got guts to answer back, so I tightened my grip on his collar, leaned my face close to his ear and whispered ominously, “I don’t want to see you go near Seojeen. As to what I'm going to do with you, you wouldn’t like it.” I pushed him harder on the wall before I released him and walked out of there.

All mixed emotions are on me now as I increased my pace to catch up to Seojeen. She was walking slowly so when I caught up with her, I grabbed her hand and just dragged her with me.

Surprised at my sudden action, "J-joonmyun? W-what’s wrong?” she asked, stuttering, probably because of my long strides as she kept pace with me. I didn’t answer or even looked back at her, as if I didn’t hear her asking.

As we got to my car, I released her hand to get the keys from my pocket and pressed the unlock button. I opened the passenger’s door and held it open, still not looking at her. From the corner of my eye, she closed the gap between us and stared at me.

From what it felt like years, I once again looked her in the eyes with my most sincerest look. She never bothered to ask and got inside the car. I closed the passenger door and walked around to get into the driver’s seat. I placed the key into the ignition, started the car, and drove out of the lot.

I drove to where my instinct led us and spotted Gwanghwamun Square. It was less crowded so I decided to stop and parked on the designated parking area.

Both of us were silent inside the car as neither of us wanted to talk first. Each of us knew when the other is upset and she probably knew that I was upset right now. The mood inside the car was really awkward so she broke that silence, “So hot in here... Joonmyun, let’s go out.”

She got out of the car closing the door behind and crossed the street towards the plaza. I cleared my head and calmed myself down as I smoothed out the things that I wanted to say to her. This time, I would tell her the truth.

I took a deep breath and got out of the car to join her. She was sitting on a concrete seat and as I got to her, I invited her, “Come walk with me.”

Her face was blank and questioning when she looked up at me, but still, she stood up and walked ahead of me. She never said anything, she just looked straight ahead. This time, I broke that silence. “Sorry about a while ago.”

She stopped and turned around to look at me, half smiling, “It’s been weeks since you’ve talked to me.”
I didn’t know how to respond. I avoided her gaze feeling guilty, “Err, sorry… I was… not myself these past few weeks.”

She chuckled, “I think I know the reason.” She followed right after me, keeping pace until we’re walking side by side. “I can understand how you feel. Sorry for making you feel that way.”

This time, I stopped and turned to face her, “Don’t ever say you’re sorry. You did nothing wrong.”

She dropped her gaze from me, maintaining her smile, “All those times I thought you were mad at me.”

I placed my fingertips on her chin and raised her face to look at me, “It's not that I am mad at you. It's just that when I talk to you, I realize how much I love you, and when I realize how much I love you, I realize I can't have you and that makes me love you even more.”

We stared into each other’s eyes when suddenly water sprouted from the ground, startling us as it sprouted even higher. It was then I realized that we were standing on the 12·23 Fountain. We were both dumbfounded and laughed at the same time as the tension seconds ago were all drained away.

A half-smile turned up the corners of her lips, “You have no idea how long I've waited for the day you’ll look my way.”

I cupped my neck and answered apologetically, “Sorry, I made you wait.” She simpered and rolled her eyes.

I held my smile and told her truthfully, “There are some things in life you simply don’t notice until they’re not there. Oh, by the way, starting from now…” I formed an imaginary telescope with my hands and peered through it as I found her face, “these eyes will be fixed on you.”

She laughed at my gesture. The sound of her carefree laughter that I once longed for filled my heart with warmth. Her laugh faded as she cocked her head on the side and asked, “What if it can’t find me?”

I grabbed her by the waist and held her slowly close to me. I once again placed my fingertips on her chin and raised her face so that our eyes are looking at each other. I stared deep into her eyes as I assured her, “Don’t worry, it will always find you.”

A wide smile broke across her face as she threw her arms around my neck and leaned her forehead against mine. I couldn’t help but smile back at her and tighten my grip around her waist. I never wanted to let this girl go and wanted this time to last, “Let’s stay like this for a while.”

Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you, I had no control over.

POST-CREDIT SCENE

Right, I almost forgot about the guy who just gave her a note this morning. “Seojeen, this morning while you were reading a book under the Cherry tree, a guy approached you and gave you something. What is it?”

She grinned at me. “So you were watching me?”

I rolled my eyes. I couldn’t help but smile at her teasing joke. “Yeah yeah, so what if I am? C’mon just tell me.”

Humor still on her face as she explained, “He was just doing an errand for Professor Kim to give that note to me. Professor Kim wants my help to write him a make-up letter for his wife because he had forgotten their anniversary.”

My lips formed an ‘O’ as it was all cleared now.
“Jealous, huh.” She said smugly.

I rolled my eyes. This girl doesn’t know how it affected me this whole time, but that won’t happen again as everything will all go back to what it is before. The only difference is that she is mine and I am hers.

THE END