Louis looked dashing in his white suit and he was adjusting his tie. He was getting ready for his wedding photo shoot with Anne at the photo studio.

Anne walked out from the changing room and smiled sweetly at him. She looked like a princess with her strapless, princess-cut wedding gown and glittering tiara.

They were taking their third photo when his phone rang. She gave him a frown and he shrugged his shoulders at her. He thought it was from the station again. He knew the case had not been closed but this appointment was made months ago.

“Hello, is this Louis? This is Auntie Mary.”

“Yes, I’m Louis. Did something happen to Jess?” he asked worriedly.

“She had been sent to the hospital. You may want to go and see her.”

“What has happened? Why is she in hospital?” he asked anxiously and took off his tie. He started walking toward the doors of the studio.

“She was bleeding. So, we had quickly called the ambulance and they took her to the hospital.”

“Louis,” Anne called out to him.

“I’ve to rush off to the hospital. Something had happened to Jess. Let’s take the photos another day. I’m sorry.” he explained to Anne, without even turning his head to face her, and hastily left the studio.

“What didn’t you call me earlier? I could have rushed her there.” he asked sternly. That was the last statement she heard from him.

Jessica was sleeping in a hospital bed and Louis was sitting next to her.

The doctor told him that she was fortunate to have been sent to hospital in time, otherwise she would have suffered a miscarriage. Her emotional distress had taken toil on her, and she was physically exhausted after her visit to Julian’s grave the day before. She needed to calm down her emotions and have a lot of rest.

“Jules” she called out in her sleep and she tried reaching out to him. Louis caught her hands and placed them close to his heart. He gave them a light kiss and placed them close to his heart again.

Anne was standing at the door and she saw his gestures. She left silently, in tears.

Louis had returned home. He was half-expecting to have another row with Anne. But, the house was empty. He thought she may have gone back to her mum’s place again. Then, he spotted a white envelope at the coffee table. He removed the letter from the envelope and read.

"Dearest Louis

I love you. You used to love me wholeheartedly too. You may not realise it but someone else is occupying your heart now. I’m too selfish to share you with anyone.

I wanted very much to marry you. We have worked hard on this relationship and I have no regrets in it. I am glad that we are not married yet, otherwise I don’t know if I am able to walk out of this relationship.

Jessica is a wonderful person. Go for it. I wish both of you the best.

By the way, don’t look for me. I may not have the determination to stay away from you.

Take care of yourself.

Love,
Anne"

He was stunned. He stared at the letter. He stared at her words.

She had left him. All her things are gone.

After Jessica’s discharge, Louis had fetched her to and from work every day whenever his work allowed it. He would also have dinner with her every night. He couldn’t care less about the gossips. After the near miscarriage, she had also become fearful and was glad to have his company, in case something went wrong again. This was just like any other night for them. She had made him a cup of coffee, while he continued with the jigsaw puzzle on the floor. He and Julian used to solve jigsaw puzzles whenever they had a difficult case on hand. Doing jigsaw puzzles gave them time for their own thoughts such that they could go over the clues again and again in their heads and try to put them together.

She placed the cup on the coffee table next to him and went to sleep. He would lock the door when he was ready to go, as usual.

He looked up and watched her walked away. She was getting really heavy in the final trimester of her pregnancy. She was tilting to her left and right as she took each step, just like a penguin. But to him, she looked nothing like a penguin and even if she did she would be the most beautiful penguin to him. The glow on her face and her maternally appearance made he wished that she would be the woman to have his children. He wanted to embrace her and kiss her rosy lips. Then, he caught his thoughts. "Bastard! You are a bastard, Louis. How can you think of Jess this way? She is Jules’ wife for goodness sake.” he scolded himself. “She WAS his wife, not IS.” His little devil said in his mind.

Louis had come to his buddy’s grave. He opened a can of beer and placed it on ground. He then opened another can for himself. “Cheers!” he raised his can to his buddy.

“I have a lot of things to tell you today. We finally caught that bastard who kidnapped and murdered the five-years old boy. I almost wanted to strangle him but somehow I was reminded of you and that you would stop me so I had let him go. I must really control myself now that you are gone.” He raised his can to the grave again and took a long sip.

He gave a sigh before continuing. “We went for a scan on Monday and the doctor has confirmed that your son is growing well. If nothing goes wrong, he will be here in two weeks. Jess is getting so big and her legs are swollen. She has already stopped work at the bakery and is waiting at home for his arrival.” He hesitated and pondered if he should continue. It was as if Julian was still alive and he would beat him up if he had continued. At last, he decided to confess.

“Jules, I know that you would want me to take care of your wife and your son. I promise you I will do that and do it well. I know you like me to love your son as mine. I’ll also do just that. I’m very anxious about his arrival. I can’t wait to see if he looks more like you or Jess. I want to be his dad. But would you be angry with me if I also love your wife as mine?” Louis was amazed that he could actually spoke out the last line. He looked at his buddy’s photo as if waiting for his reply.

“Sorry, I know I shouldn’t. Jess is still very much in love with you. She has not done anything to lead me on. I’m just a fool, that’s all. Don’t worry. I’ll look after them for you.” He finally said, knowing that his friend would never answer him. When he finished his can of beer, he stood up, gave the top of the tombstone a pat, and left the cemetery.

(17.04.2007)