Gulf is supposed to be preparing now for the event later. It's their reunion for all the casts of TharnType the Series and everyone's excited for the event. Fans are spazzing on twitter for the said event and making trend no.1 worldwide. It's an exciting event, after 7 years it was released, they will now see each other again. 

What are you doing, Gulf?

He was laying on his bed. He's been working nonstop since last week. A lot of promotions, pictorials and fan events. He wanted to make sure that he's doing his best to fulfill his reponsibilities so after the hectic week, it's time for his rest time. Today is supposed to be day one of his rest day. His manager talked to him that the reunion for TTTS is not on his schedule and he has the freedom to attend or not to but knowing himself, he will do it anyway. He missed the team. He missed his first family. He missed everything about that very series. His first and the most memorable series he had for his whole career. That series made him what he is now. 

*Ring* 

Gulf answered his phone without seeing the caller because he knew that it will be Mild. 

"GULF!"

Mild it is. 

"Yes phi?" 

"What yes phi? where are you? I'm preparing now. I'll fetch you later. Be sure that you'll be done once I'm there. Bye." 

Not given a chance to answer, Gulf knew that he needs to prepare. Get up and do it, Gulf. 

He is alone and wants to play his music. He wants music in the background to distract him. He is not really ready for this reunion. He missed his first fam but he knew in his heart that the his first love is also there. The thought made him cry. He knew that deep in his heart that there are regrets. There are longing. After 5 years and the pain is still there. He's tiring himself all the time so that once he will go back to his condo, he will just sleep and forget it the next day and the cycle continues. 

I'm jealous of the rain
That falls upon your skin
It's closer than my hands have been

"Love, come on. It's raining."

"I want to dance under the rain, Mew. I'm serious." 

"But Love, we might get sick. I don't want you go to work feeling heavy and sick." 

"But Mew.. please..." 

Mew looked at Gulf and just smiled. He will always let him win. It's his magic. Gulf's magic to him. 

"Okay, let's dance.." 

Gulf softly giggle and hug mew and slowly, they sway in the song that only them can hear. Gulf put his face on Mew's and smiles.

"This is my number two, Love. Dancing in the rain." 

"So what's your number one?" Mew asked him while giving soft kisses on Gulf's face. 

"Wait, stop kissing me first." Gulf giggles softly. 

"I won't stop. Tell me your number one.." Mew said while continue kissing Gulf. 

Gulf holds Mew and looked at him straight in the eyes. He smiled. 

And he kissed him which Mew responded happily. 

I'm jealous of the wind
That ripples through your clothes
It's closer than your shadow

Gulf didn't know that he was stucked on his position. Standing near his music player and holding his phone while the first music is playing. He wants to cry now. He wants to just stay. He doen't want to go anywhere.

He must do it anyway. He will faced him after 3 years. He will do it with his first family. How tragic it is, that the magical love started with the whole cast too and now, the will to let go, will be with his first family also. 

He really wants to cry now but he stops himself. Turn off the player and start preparing. Mild will get mad for sure and if he wanted to finish on time, he should start it now. 

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"Gulf, we're late. What are you doing?" Mild said while looking at Gulf fixing his clothes in front of the mirror. 

"Phi, stop nagging me. We're not late and I don't want to be early too. Let's spend few minutes more."

"What's wrong with you? Really? You're not like that. Gulf, it's been three years!" 

"Phi..." Gulf stops fixing his dress and bow down. He promised to himself not to think about it. But his anxiousness is winning today. He's been like this since morning and eveything is so chaotic inside of him. What will he do when he sees him in the event? What will he say? How will he react? All these questions. He just want to stay home and rest. 

"Gulf, I know what you're thinking. I'm here. I'm just here. I know that it's hard. You have to forgive yourself. It's been 3 years, I know it's not enough but let your self rest. You decided to do it because it will make you happy. I know. You will make him happy too. Don't beat yourself up too much. You will be okay. Soon. For now, think that it will happen. You both are in the same industry. Sooner or later, you will see him. So let's do it today. No media or anything. You will do okay. Trust me?" Mild said as he hug Gulf. This little brother of him who he considered as his real baby bro is not being himself and he will not let it happen. He needs to do it now or else, it will be chaotic the next chance they will get to see each other again. 

"Okay Phi. I'll be fine. I will be fine. I promise. First and last tonight. I will be fine." As Mild heard that reply, his heart is breaking but he will not let Gulf know about this. He wanted the man to be strong and he wanted it now. He can do it. 

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The place of the event is so light. Everyone's hugging, laughing, crying and talking to each other. Gulf entered the place and the whole cast cheer and hug him. Everyone missed this man and Gulf is so happy seeing them again. When he saw P'Mame, he hugs her tightly. 

"P, thank you. I love you." P'Mame just hug him and congratulate him. 

"You've grown so much, Gulf. Look at you now, so successful. I heard from your directors and teams from the movie you made that you did so well. Everyone's so proud of you. I am so proud of you and I missed you." P'Mame said as he looks at Gulf. They both have a teary eyes and hug one last time before P'Mame said that he needs to see the other cast which he did. 

Gulf saw Mild talking to the other cast and he went to talk to them also. He forget all the tension around him and just talk to others without worrying. If he will face him which he knows that it will come, he will worry about it later. For now, let him enjoy. 

After several talks, the staffs cheering again. Mild looks at Gulf while they're sitting and eating their food, Gulf just nodded and he knew at that moment that Mew is there already. 

"How's everyone? Ohmy, I miss you P'mame! I miss all of you guys. It's good to be back." Gulf can hear Mew's voice nearing their place and he ready himself. 

Gulf looks up and saw Mew right there, standing and smiling at him. His heart stops. His breathing stops and as if Mew can sense it, he touches Gulf's forehead playfully and laughs softly. 

"Hi, Gulf! How are you?" Mew asks him while smiling.

Gulf cannot answer back not because he lost all the words to say but because the moment Mew looks at him with that eyes and touch his forehead like it's the most natural thing to do, he lost the battle. How can I let go of this person? 

"Hi mew! I miss you!" Mild interrupted their interaction because he knew that Gulf cannot answer. He saw it in his eyes, the longing in Gulf's eyes and the sadness that immediately fade away once he interrupted them. Gulf bow down and looks up again to Mew but this time, he just listens to their conversation. 

"Miss you too Mild. What's up now? How's your new series going?" Mew said while smiling at Mild. 

"It's fine. Everyone's doing their best. Hopefully it will be a hit once it's released. You? How's your movie? I heard that you guys are almost done filming it?" 

"Yeah, I'm so excited for it. It's my first time doing an action movie and I hope you guys can support it once it's released. I'm very--" 

"Mew! sorry! I need to check my things before leaving the car. Hello everyone!" 

"Oh! Guys! I want you to meet my fiance, Tin. I want to introduce to you guys first before we go publicly soon to announce our wedding." Mew excitedly introduce her to the whole fam as he holds her waist. 

"Hello everyone! Mew is so excited to see you guys. He even left me while checking my things because he cannot wait anymore. But I'm glad that I finally met you guys, his favorite family." Tin said while smiling to everyone. She's a very simple girl from a simple family. They heard about her before from Mew and she is one of the daughter of their family's friend. They grew up together and once Tin was back in thailand, they went to see each other and finally decided to be together after a year. Now they decided to get married after talking to their family and settling it once and for all. 

At first, Mew's family talked to him about it. Mew said that he is not getting any younger. It's time for him to settle down and knowing Tin, he knew that he made the right choice. He assured his family that he is happy and loved and he cannot ask for more when he's with Tin. He's so happy to finally see his own family in the future and that convinced his family that he'll be fine and he's happy. Because that's what matters the most, Mew being happy. His happiness. 

Gulf stood up from his seat and offer a handshake to Tin. 

"Hello Tin, nice meeting you! and congrats!" Gulf said while smiling at Mew and Tin.

"Yah, Nong Gulf greeted my finace but not me. What's wrong huh?" Mew jokingly said to Gulf and smiling at him. 

Nong.

"Because you did not let me talk and Mild was talking with you so I did not have any chance." 

"It's my fault now huh Gulf?" Mild said

and the whole fam laughed, same with Mew and Gulf. The party continues and everyone enjoy it as well. 

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"I'm sorry I need to go first. Please take care of Mew for me." Tin said and hugs everyone. Now she knows why Mew is so fond of this family. His family. They are very approachable and lovely. 

"Hey, I'm not a kid!" Mew said defensively. "Let's go! I'll take her to the car first then I'll go back."

"Bye Tin! Take care! Thank you!" One of the crew said and waves at her. She bows and left with Mew. 

"Mild, have you seen Gulf?" P'Mame asked Mild. 

"He told me that he needs to go out first. Get some air. I let him. You know, Gulf is like that."

P'Mame looked at Mild worriedly and told him to just look for Gulf andf Mild said that she don't need to be worried. Gulf will be fine. 

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Gulf is outside and sitting at the little garden that the event place had. He feels like he needs to get some air. He can't figure out what he should feel while they are in the party. He's mind is blank but he knew once he review what happened inside, it will get messy. 

Come on, Gulf. Don't be like this. He's okay now. He's fine. Now it's time for you too. Be fine, please. Not now later, just wait a little more. Gulf keeps repeating this to himself. Until he saw a figure coming to his place. 

From afar, he can figure out who it is. It's Mew. Calm down, just few more. Wait a little more, self.

As he saw Mew walking near to him another flashback came.. 

"If you can choose a place to get married, where is it?" 

"I want an intimate wedding. I don't want a lot of people in our venue. Only those people who witnessed our love can be invited." Gulf answered while laughing so hard while looking at Mew's reaction. "What? why? you asked me and I answered!" Gulf said and continue laughing at Mew.

"baby, you're weird. We're artists and of course, our fans, I want them to witness it too!" Mew said while hugging Gulf from behind. Today is their rest day and they want to spent it while lazying at home, watch movies. 

"I want it intimate for the first time."

"So there is-"

"Yes there is, Mew. There is a second time for the public. I want the first to be intimate." 

"Is that your number one?" 

"No." Gulf looks at Mew lovingly. 

"What is your first?" Mew said as he touches Gulf's nose.  

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"Gulf! you're here!" 

Gulf looks at Mew and smiles. "Yes I'm here. Get some air." 

"Are you drunk?" Mew sits beside him and join him in the garden. 

"No I'm not. You?" 

"Nope. Your eyes looks sleepy I remember-" Mew stops and smiles. "Sorry." 

"It's okay. I'm not drunk. So how are you?" 

"I'm fine. I actually wanted to ask you that first." Gulf giggles at him and look at the garden. 

"I'm glad you're finally settling down. I can't wait to see you in Tux!" 

"Gulf, I always wear Tux, are you kidding me?"

"No. It's different when you know that it's your special day." Gulf looks at him lovingly. But being with Gulf for years, you will know what's real. It's in his eyes. 

"Gulf.." 

"What?" 

Mew wanted to ask him something but stops himself and just look around. 

"Congratulations Mew. I'm happy that you're happy." Gulf looks at him with those eyes again and Mew cannot hold back anymore. 

"Why?" 

"Why did I leave you?" 

"Yes. Why? I deserve to know it, Gulf, Why?" 

"Because it's for the best. We're depending on each other too much. We're too focus about us that we forgot we need to have to our own also." 

"Gulf.. you know that what makes me happy is you." 

"that's the very reason why, Mew." 

Mew looks at him with his teary eyes. He is happy for sure but seeing Gulf now, he just let go of that thought. He knows that this man in front of him will always have that special part in him. Gulf is that someone you cannot forget easily. He is that special. He knew deep inside of him that no one will replace this man. Gulf was once his life. 

"I'm sorry." Gulf said while looking at Mew. His teary eyes. He slowly lifts his hand and touch Mew's face. "I'm sorry Mew. I just have to do that to think things thoroughly. Our five years was a lifetime for me.  It's magical. I will never forget that." 

"Gulf.." Mew is crying now. Holding Gulf's hands tightly. 

"I want you to be happy. It's enough for me. Our love, Mew it is special but what you have with Tin is more special. The way she looks at you Mew, you are her whole world. I can see that because I had the same look with you before." 

"You still have that look, Gulf." Mew continues to cry and looks at Gulf. They are both crying. Gulf nodded at him as he agree with what Mew said that made Mew cry even more. 

"Why did you let me go?" 

"I'm sorry Mew... I'm so sorry." Gulf said and hugs Mew tightly while repeating his apologies. 

It was that moment he knew the longing. They both longed for each other for so long. Gulf is crying in his arms. His arms which Gulf considered as his home. He felt home but he knew in his heart that it will never be the same again. They can't do it. They missed their chance and maybe that's enough reason to let go. But Mew is hugging him tightly. 

"How can I let go now, Gulf?" 

"I don't want you to, but you have to." 

They're still hugging each other. They wanted time to stop but it will never happen. 

"Mew, make her happy. I told you, you are her world. Her life. Now I want to ask you one more question." 

"Gulf..." 

"Are you happy? If you are, promise me to be happy, after this. Be happy." 

"Gulf you know-" 

"Answer me."

"Yes. I'm happy with Tin. I will not lie to you. She had seen me at my worst and love me for my whole being. I promise to be happy. I promise, Gulf." Mew said while looking at Gulf and smiling sadly at him as they let go of the hug. 

Gulf hugs him again. He needs to tell something to Mew and he cannot bare to look at his face while saying it to him. 

"Good. Thank you, Mew. I remember you always asked me what's my number one. Sorry I did not take the chance to tell it to you but I will tell you now." 

Gulf let go of the hug and hold Mew's face. He looks at him while smiling sadly. 

"You being happy. That's my number one." 

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Thanks for reading!