Nothing. Chan felt nothing. He shut his eyes tight and tried to clear his mind but no matter how hard he tried all he thought of was how relieved he was that he didn't feel anything. Na Ri stood wide eyed, unsure of how to react. This was by no means her first kiss but the feeling felt foreign to her. It was indescribable, neither a positive nor negative feeling, almost as though she felt nothing at all. 

She pushed him away from her and folded her arms across her chest. "What the heck was that for?" She raised an eyebrow whilst waiting for his response. "Do I need a reason to kiss someone?" Chan retaliated with a roll of his eyes. "Well, I mean..I guess not but-" She began but he cut her off. "Why are you overreacting? It's not like that's your first kiss! In fact, I bet you've done much more than that." He interrupted and she scowled. "What are you trying to say?" Na Ri raised her voice, feeling slightly offended by his remark. 

Chan paused for a moment. What was he trying to say? "I uh- I just mean that you're like...not ugly so I figured...y'know!" He explained but his attempt only caused the pair to blush. Na Ri smiled and let out a small laugh. "Is this how you call girls pretty? 'Not ugly'?" She and he sighed before walking off. "Lets go home." He said without looking back to see if she was following him.

She jogged to catch up with him but neither of the two looked at one another. The silence was comfortable despite their minds being loud and crowded with thoughts. 

"Chan?" She asked once the two reached the bus stop. "Mhm?" He muttered whilst watching a group of younger boys across the street all laughing and joking around. She followed his gaze to meet the view and sighed, knowing exactly what he must be thinking about right now.  

"It's okay to feel alone. I mean I'm not much but I am here for you. You're not totally alone." She tried to cheer him up but she could tell by the cold stare in his eyes that he wasn't really comforted by her words. "Y'know, there's a difference between being alone and being lonely." He began, making eye contact with her for the first time. She remained silent, urging for him to continue on. She always found moments like this where he would open up to be so insightful. His words always seemed to carry weight and were laced with emotion and that was something she's grown to admire about him.

"The difference between being alone and being lonely is simple. You can be in a crowd full of people and feel as though you're invisible, like you don't matter at all! You wanna know what the worst part about that feeling is? It follows you around wherever you go. That's being lonely." Chan watched Na Ri as she took in what he said, hanging on his every word. She'd never been so mesmerised by anybody's words before. 

"And being alone. Being alone's not so bad. People seem to always class being alone as something bad but it's not. You can be alone but be the happiest person alive. It's all about perception. We all have a different perception of things and that's why people get labels like 'popular' or 'loser'." Chan concluded. 

"What are you then? Alone or lonely?" Na Ri asked but Chan smiled while shaking his head, dismissing her question. "You were gonna ask me something before, right? Or is the whole lonely conversation what it was about?" He dodged her question by shooting one back, knowing how easily she seems to get distracted. 

She sighed as she fought the nerves arising in her. She knew asking him was probably pointless since the chances of him answering honestly were slim but curiosity was eating her alive. "Why did you really kiss me?" 

She couldn't help but feel as though he had a reason for the seemingly spontaneous moment but hearing the answer was something she figured would be difficult. "Hey, the bus is coming." Chan clapped his hands together, completely ignoring her question. She sighed but decided letting it go for now would be best as they got on the bus to begin their journey home.

Chan let out a sigh as they sat together. His plan had worked and now he knew he really didn't have feelings for Na Ri. He stole a glance at her as she typed a text to someone, a look of concentration plastered on her face. She looked up from her phone and shot him a smile. "Today was nice." She commented and he shrugged. "I guess." Chan deadpanned causing her smile to be replaced with a pout. 

"Do you pride yourself on ting on others or something?" She grunted as she took in his satisfied smirk. Chan wasn't going to lie, he enjoyed putting others down and right now, putting Na Ri down was his way of ensuring he really didn't care for her, at least that was the impression it gave. Chan chose not to reply which annoyed her further. She couldn't help but find his mixed signals frustrating. 

The bus pulled over and Na Ri hurriedly stood up, surprising Chan. "This isn't your stop." Chan informed her but she waved him off. "I know, I know. Dad wants to go out for dinner at the chicken place nearby." She replied as she stood by the door, preparing to step off the bus. 

"Bye Chan!" She waved goodbye to him as he watched from his seat. His chest began to feel tight as he thought over the second part of his plan. "Goodbye Na Ri." He muttered as she stepped onto the footpath. He knew avoiding her from now on was for the best but he couldn't ignore the sudden emptiness that hung over him since her departure from the bus. His life would soon be exactly how it was before she came to know him. 

Her words from before were all that consumed his mind ever since she said them. 'What are you then? Alone or lonely?'  In that moment he hadn't replied to her which she expected but now that he was left in his own presence, it was all he could think about. Before he met her, he wouldn't have hesitated to say lonely but lately he hadn't felt  that way. 

He stared at where she once sat before whispering his reply. 

"Faded."

Monday morning rolled around fast, much too fast for Na Ri's liking. She tied her hair up in a pony tail before leaving the school bathroom and heading to her locker to prepare her books for upcoming classes. 

She was surrounded by the usual stares and whispering but something seemed different. People's looks of curiosity seemed to be replaced by glares holding harsh unsaid words. She thought this was weird but shrugged it off as she opened locker 376 and exchanged her books but the odd looks continued. She felt vulnerable and scared, almost as though she was in a crowd of laughing people. She hurriedly stuffed items into her bag before slamming her locker door and rushing to room 43 for attendance, desperate to escape the unkind gaze of other students. 

She was surprised to see not only Chan but Bo Ra too. Bo Ra never came to classes before the bell since she was very chatty and popular, often spending as much of her time as possible roaming the hallways while talking to others. What surprised her the most was the two of them together at the back of the class. Chan was sitting in his usual spot but Bo Ra was standing in front of him, her back to Na Ri. She could tell by Chan's annoyed expression their conversation wasn't pleasant. 

She stood by the doorway, hesitant on whether to enter the classroom or not. She didn't want to interrupt their conversation but the looks being thrown her way were making her uncomfortable. She was about the leave the class when she saw Bo Ra slapping Chan across the face. He remained in his seat, not even flinching at the sudden contact. 

A gasp left Na Ri's lips, earning the attention of Bo Ra and Chan. Bo Ra whipped around to face Na Ri while Chan quickly looked away. He watched the clouds pass outside the window as the two girls stared at each other, wishing he could just disappear to avoid the thick tension.

"I hope you're happy!" Bo Ra spat at her.  "W-what did I do?" Na Ri stammered. Bo Ra approached the confused Na Ri with a dark expression. Na Ri had never seen this side to her before and honestly she felt scared of her. 

She turned her attention to the oblivious Chan, desperate for him to hear her silent cry for help. Before she knew what was happening Bo Ra pushed her against the wall causing a sharp pain to course up her back. "What are yo-?" She began when Bo Ra clenched her fists at her sides. 

"I can't believe I thought you were my friend! You stupid ! Who do you even think you are?" Bo Ra yelled at her. Na Ri's heart pounded wildly as Bo Ra raised her hand, waiting to feel the impact on her face. The sound of footsteps echoed through the classroom. Na Ri grew hopeful. Perhaps Chan was here to help her but her hope soon turned to disappointment when he walked past the scene, his head facing down hiding his features as he walked out of the classroom, taking all her hope with him.

Bo Ra laughed maliciously before Na Ri felt a sting in her cheek. "You're so sad. Why would someone like him help you? Huh?" She mocked with a roll of her eyes. Tears welled in Na Ri's eyes, not believing what was happening."Why would you tell people I was pregnant! Why the would you do that?" She screamed as tears dribbled down her cheeks. Na Ri felt the air leave her lungs at the sudden accusation. "Do you really think I'd spread false rumours about you? Is that how you think of me?" Na Ri muttered as she cupped her cheek.

  "False rumours, eh?" She scoffed. Na Ri  stood in shock at what Bo Ra was implying. "It's true?" She hesitantly questioned. 

"Oh Na Ri, there's so much you don't know. Just wait and see. You'll soon realise what you've gotten yourself into."