Chapter 13: On Fire

“You can’t keep getting angry, your injury will never heal,” Joy said, wrapping a fresh new bandage around Wendy’s leg.

“You know it’s not something I can control, Joy,” Wendy said bluntly.

“I know. But if you want to hide your other…if you want to hide this from Irene, you need to distance yourself from her. It’s the only way, and you know it,” Joy finished and stood back up.

Wendy remained silent as Joy cleaned her hands to avoid suspicion.

“You can’t avoid seeing her at school, but any other time, you’re just-“

“I know! Okay? I know…” Wendy’s voice shook as she clenched her fists.

Joy’s eyes narrowed as she looked at the weakened Wendy in front of her. She had never seen her like this before, and she knew it was a lot more than just the pain in her leg.

Wendy stood back up and opened the door, finding an empty living room in front of her.

“Where is she?” Wendy worriedly looked around the house.

“I don’t know…” Joy replied.

Wendy looked down at the ripped up note on the floor and grabbed her coat and umbrella.

“Wendy! What are you doing!?” Joy said, watching Wendy run to the door.

“I have to find her,” Wendy said, putting her coat on.

“No! You’re crazy! Your leg will never be able to handle it!” Joy grabbed Wendy’s arm.

“I can’t let her go out there alone!!” Wendy shouted, releasing Joy’s grip and running out into the rain.

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Irene stumbled on the wet floor, unable to walk straight as she clutched her chest. Her tears were still falling, and she was wandering around, trying to get home. She was devastated that Wendy was once again hiding something from her, even after all they’ve been through. But what hurt her most of all, was that Wendy couldn’t understand how she felt.

She ran into the wall next to her several times. Her legs lost strength, and she was slowly about to collapse from the pain inside of her.

 She hated it. She hated this feeling that made her feel lost and weak. She hated that she was alone again; dealing with it herself, with no one else that could help her. She hated that she could do nothing to stop this feeling.

A car drove by, splashing water up into her face as she went on, ignoring her surroundings. There was only one thing in her mind.

Wendy…why…?

She managed to get to her front door, her eyes blank, and unlocked it, slowly dragging herself inside. She fell to her knees, leaning her head against the wall, staring into her dark home. She was no longer crying, only lost, and in pain. Her arms hung lifelessly on her sides, and her mind was no longer able to process anything else.

She was there for a long time, her heart hurting more than it ever had before. Her breath was sharp and thin, forcing her to hit her chest over and over again to keep herself conscious.

I…can’t…

Eventually she pulled herself back up, and walked towards the stairs, her eyes stuck on her feet. She made it halfway up before she stopped, and fell back down again, sitting on the steps and crying. She didn’t know what to do about this pain. It was excruciating, and it felt like the worst thing she’d ever experienced.

What’s happening to me…?

She was scared now, unable to control her emotions. Her hands shaking as she bit her lips, wishing it could go away. 

A loud banging came from the door, shocking Irene awake from her disorientation.

“Irene!! Irene are you there!? Open the door!!” Wendy’s voice called out to her.

Irene stared at the door, afraid of what might happen if she let her in.

“Irene please…open the door! I need to talk to you!” Wendy continued to pound against the wooden barrier that was stopping her.

Go away…please…

“Irene I’m sorry…I’m sorry that I left you alone…”

Just leave…

“I need to make sure you’re okay, so please…open the door…”

I don’t want to see you…

Wendy couldn’t take it anymore. She looked up, rain pouring into her eyes, and found the window leading into Irene’s bedroom on the second floor. She jumped up and grabbed onto the slippery rooftop, and pulled herself on top. She forced herself up against the window, pushing it open and falling onto Irene’s desk. Her leg was burning, and blood was now flowing down to her feet, but she didn’t care.

She opened the door.

Irene turned around, frozen at the sight of Wendy in front of her.

“H-how…”

Wendy walked over to the stairs, staring intensely down at Irene, who was shivering. With each step down, Irene’s gaze slowly turned away, and she instantly ran down the stairs towards the door. 

However, Wendy was faster.

“Let me go!” Irene shouted, as her arms were being held onto.

“No! Listen to me Irene, please!” Wendy forced Irene away from the door, and pushed her against the wall.

“I don’t want to! I don’t want to see you!!” Irene cried out as she tried to free herself.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry for everything!” Wendy said, tightening her grip.

Irene shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut.

“I didn’t mean…I didn’t mean to hurt you…” Wendy had tears in her eyes.

Irene continued to shake her head, and finally gave up, sliding against the wall down to the floor, Wendy following her. They knelt on the floor together, Wendy releasing her grip, and Irene crying as she stared at the ground.

“You don’t understand…you can’t help me…” Irene whispered.

“Let me try…please…” Wendy held her hands.

Irene lifted her head up and stared at Wendy. Her eyes were red and swollen.

“There’s nothing you can do! You did this to me! Every day! Every time I see you…!” Irene couldn’t speak anymore as her hands hit against Wendy’s arm weakly.

“Irene…” Wendy sat there, letting Irene take her anger out on her.

“Why did you do this to me…? Why do I feel this way-”

Wendy lips crashed into Irene’s within a split second. She acted upon impulse, and held Irene’s face in her hands as she kissed her. Irene’s finally woke up and stayed still, staring straight ahead as she felt her pain being lifted away. Irene’s face flushed, and the cold clothes that wrapped around her now felt warm and comforting.

Wendy let go, breathing heavily, her breath almost foggy as she looked into Irene’s wide eyes.

“I…I’m sorry…” Wendy said, breathlessly, feeling guilty for what she’d just done.

Irene’s hand grabbed onto Wendy’s coat and she pulled her towards her, kissing her deeply as she slowly closed her eyes.

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The rain finally stopped.

Irene had changed and was sitting on her bed, hugging her pillow tightly, pressing her face into it. Her lips still felt warm, and she couldn’t help blushing when Wendy walked in after taking a shower.

They hadn’t said anything to each since their kiss downstairs. Wendy sat on the bed next to Irene, who was having trouble looking at her.

“It stopped raining,” Wendy said, nervously looking out the window.

“Yeah…” Irene hugged her pillow tighter.

A strange silence hovered in the room as they could both feel exactly what they wanted to say to each other. The small movements, tiny glances, and short breaths were more than enough to show their embarrassment towards each other.  “Are you hungry?” Irene asked into her pillow.

“A little bit.” Wendy answered.

“Do you…” Irene blushed.

“Hmm?” Wendy looked at Irene.

“Do you…want to go out to eat?” Irene’s face was now hidden.

Wendy was excited, but remembered the torn up note on the floor of her home. Seeing Irene earlier, and also the fact that her leg was still slightly numb from treating it in the shower on her own, she shook her head.

Irene’s eyes turned sad as she saw Wendy’s rejection.

“No, I don’t want to go out to eat.”

Irene looked back down at her pillow.

“I want to eat here, with you.” Wendy smiled at Irene.

Irene felt her heart skip a bit after hearing Wendy’s words. She looked up from her pillow and nodded.

“But,” Wendy added, “I’m cooking this time.”

Irene couldn’t contain her smile and nodded again, following Wendy down the stairs.

Irene’s eyes followed Wendy’s every movement, and she couldn’t understand why she was looking at Wendy so much differently than before. Wendy looked brighter, and more beautiful as she walked around. She noticed more about her eyes, and how they sometimes looked gentle, but other times, looked like they were on fire. In fact, she never realized just how good Wendy looked, from her toned muscles to her little smile that would appear when she was embarrassed. It was like looking at a completely different person.

As Irene fell into a trance, Wendy did what she could, and finished the lunch she was working on. She walked over to the dining table and set their dishes down.

“It’s ready!” Wendy said, excitedly.

Irene blinked and responded with what sounded like a dolphin’s chirp and sat down, ready to dig in.

Wendy’s eyes focused onto Irene’s mouth as she took her first bite.

“It’s…” Irene started, making Wendy nervous.

Irene chewed some more, and then smiled, “It’s delicious!”

Wendy breathed a sigh of relief and smiled back, happy that she finally made a meal that Irene could accept. She learned a lot from Irene, but she’d been secretly practicing at home and letting Joy test her dishes.

Irene ate happily while looking at Wendy, still unable to peel her eyes away from her. Wendy noticed this and tried to ignore it.

“Are you finished?” Wendy asked, standing up and walking over to Irene, who was lightly tapping her plate with her fork, unaware she’d already finished everything. Once again, she woke up from staring at Wendy for too long and nodded as Wendy brought her plate back to the sink.

Irene stood up and went next to Wendy as she was scrubbing the dishes and grabbed a towel.

“What are you doing?” Wendy asked, secretly happy about it.

“I’m helping you wash the dishes,” Irene giggled.

“It’s only a couple of plates and pans, I think I can manage,” Wendy said, smiling.

“Say that to me after you fix whatever happened to your leg,” Irene teased.

“It was a small accident. But it’s going to get better, I promise,” Wendy confessed.

“I’ll make sure of it,” Irene placed the last dish on the rack and quickly pecked Wendy on the cheek.

Wendy’s knees went weak as she saw Irene slightly skip back upstairs.

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“So…” 

Wendy muttered as the awkward air returned in Irene’s room.

“Are we…” she started, too embarrassed to finish.

Irene slid her hand under Wendy’s and linked her fingers with her. “I hope so,” Irene smiled shyly as she held Wendy’s hand.

Wendy’s heart went faster as Irene placed her head gently on her shoulder. Irene’s finger slowly lifted up and brushed against the cloth covering her wound.

“You still haven’t told me how you hurt yourself…” Irene mentioned, with a worried look.

Wendy swallowed, “It was an accident. At the hospital when I brought my cousin there...I just…wasn’t paying attention. But it’s better now.”

Irene nodded as she reached her other arm over and put it on Wendy’s leg, “I hope you feel better soon.”

 Wendy smiled, “I already feel better.”

“This is…new for me. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way for someone before…” Irene blushed.

“Me neither…”

“Should we…keep it a secret?” Irene asked, thinking about Seulgi.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea to hide this from Seulgi,” Wendy said, knowingly.

“What about your cousin? I don’t think she likes me very much…”

“She’s just a bit protective of me, since I’m the last of her family. She’ll understand.”

“The last? You mean…”

“My parents passed away a long time ago. When I was just a little girl. I grew up with my…uncle. He took care of me, and I met my cousin when I was with him.”

“Oh…” Irene felt guilty about not knowing about that information sooner.

Wendy reassured her by clenching her hand, “It surprised me too, when you told me you lived on your own.”

Irene remembered the note.

“Do you think…someone knows that I live alone?”

Wendy could feel Irene’s hand shaking. She turned over and faced Irene, placing her hand on her face.

“I promised you. That everything was going to be okay.”

Irene looked deep into Wendy’s eyes.

“It’s on fire again.”

“What?”

“Your eyes…they’re on fire again.”

Irene looked down at her hands.

“Can you…stay with me tonight?”

 Wendy pulled Irene’s head towards her shoulder again.

“You know it’s only 2 in the afternoon…right?”