Author's Note: This story has been on my laptop for a long time. I was searching for something else when I stumbled across this. I don't remember when I started it. But it already had 5000+ words and I decided to give it an ending. I don't think I like it much because it became too complicated. But I don't hate it either. 

If there was one person Lee Hyukjae hated more than anything else in this world then it was Lee Donghae. That guy, his former childhood friend, had everything and rubbed it on Hyukjae’s not-so-pretty face. It was the biggest disadvantage Hyukjae had. He was a seemingly perfect guy but, in Donghae’s words, God decided to become fair and messed up his face. For equality, Donghae had said.

When it came to looks, all the handsomeness was poured into Lee-freaking-Donghae. That proud little jerk – is what Hyukjae would like to call him. Although his girlfriend, Seonhee, assured him that he was handsome, not as handsome as Donghae, but still handsome, Hyukjae wasn’t convinced. Not when his every friend pointed out just how ugly he was. Within their group, that’s the basketball team, he was at the bottom in looks. Even Kyuhyun and Ryeowook, the two juniors were placed above him.

“Hey ugly,” Hyukjae’s head tilted forward with the impact of hit delivered to the back of his head. There was no need to turn around and catch the culprit. Obviously Mr. Rude was Lee Donghae.

“Why are you here?” He was annoyed. No matter what, Donghae always found a way to open his filthy mouth and insult him.

They were inside the lecture hall and Hyukjae was, as usual, on his seat. Donghae sat next to him.

“Its party at Siwon’s tonight. Are you coming?”

“No, I’m not,” Hyukjae replied. “Stop talking to me. I think I’ve already established that we aren’t friends. As long as you call me ugly, we can’t be friends.”

“It’s not my fault,” Donghae spoke innocently. “The moment you stop being ugly, I’ll stop calling you one.”

“Shut up!” Hyukjae hit Donghae’s arm. The boy laughed merrily.

“So... are you coming?”

“No, I’m not. I’m tutoring Seonhee today.” He shook his head.

“What? She wants to see your ugly face even after college. That’s blasphemy.” Donghae made a gagging sound. “What else can I expect anyway? She agreed to go out with you. That’s blasphemous enough.”

Hyukjae closed his eyes. He didn’t want to hear a single word coming out of Donghae’s mouth. That boy was a bully with an innocent face.

The professor came and Donghae left him in peace. The class started and he concentrated. He needed to maintain his top position in the class. He needed to prove he was smart or people would walk over him because of his face.

He wished he was handsome. Even more than Lee Donghae. Begrudgingly, he had to admit that Donghae was handsome. He turned his head to look at the boy, next to him, sleeping on the desk.

With a scoff, Hyukjae faced forward.

Although Donghae was dumb and stupid, everyone still loved him. Appearance meant everything at first glance, that’s what Hyukjae had learned. Donghae always made the perfect first impression even though he was far from that.

People only cared about beauty on the surface. Even though they preached about ‘what lies inside’, outer appearance mattered the most. That’s why, ugly people, like him, had to work harder than someone like Lee Donghae.

** **

“Oppa,” Seonhee came running to her boyfriend who had just exited the class after the final siren. Donghae was behind him. She stopped and then indiscreetly glared at the shorter boy who glared back at her. She didn’t like this boy who often made fun of her boyfriend.

“Seonhee,” Hyukjae showed his adorable gummy grin and she swooned.

“How was your day, Oppa?”

“It was good. Yours?” He started walking by her side as she linked their hands.

“Nice. But I missed you.” She looked at him and pouted. He smiled and leaned down to softly kiss her. She giggled after he pulled back.

“Better?” he asked in a soft but y voice.

She nodded. Her boyfriend was the best - mature and smart and handsome. No matter what anyone said, Hyukjae was undoubtedly handsome. She was aware that being called ugly made Hyukjae upset. She wanted to punch everyone who called him that.

 Then she remembered that she had to tell him something important. “Oppa, I have to go for shopping with mom so you can’t tutor me today.”

“Is that so? I won’t be able to see you then. I will miss you.” He pretended to be sad and she smiled. Pausing, she stood on his toes and pressed their lips together again.

** **

“Hey ugly,” Donghae said after Seonhee sauntered away.

“You’re still here. I thought you’d leave. Don’t have anything else to do?” Hyukjae gave him a bored look.

“You aren’t going to tutor her tonight, right? Then just come to the party with me.”

“No,”

“Why not? Are you abandoning your best friend?” Donghae had the audacity to sound baffled. Hyukjae wondered if Donghae just pretended to be stupid or was actually stupid.

Hyukjae scoffed. “You are not my best friend.”

“So you’re coming, right?” Donghae spoke as soon as Hyukjae finished.

“Are you deaf?” Hyukjae gave him an exasperated look. “I’m not going.”

“But you should come. Come with me tonight and I’ll stop calling you ugly.”

Hyukjae became quiet. He just wanted to get Donghae off his back. If he agreed, Donghae would stop pestering him about the party, because he knew the stubborn boy won’t stop otherwise. Also, he won’t have to hear the word ‘ugly’ every single day. His friends were bad but Donghae was the worst with the insults. His voice was like a constant irritating buzz, noise pollution. If that stopped, it would be a blessing for him.

“Fine,” Hyukjae sighed. “Don’t forget what you just promised.”

“I won’t.” Donghae smiled like a child.

Hyukjae had to shake his head on how childish Donghae actually was. A college student yet his mentality leveled with a five-year-old kid.

** **

Hyukjae put dark blue jeans, a white shirt and a blue jacket thrown over it. He put blue and white vans.  The doorbell rang. He ran his hand through his bangs, they were casually falling on his eyes and opened the door.

Donghae stood there, dressed in a white shirt and blue jeans. Apart from a nice face, Donghae had a nice body too. He was muscular, unlike Hyukjae who was more on a leaner side.

“You look... ugly.”

Hyukjae huffed. He had almost expected Donghae to call him handsome when he momentarily paused but no, he had to be the jerk he was.

“You said you won’t call me ugly ever again. I’m not going with you.” Hyukjae had started to take off his shoes. Donghae was on his knees in a flash, preventing him from taking them off.

“You can’t do that.” Donghae almost pleaded. “The deal will come in act after we reach the party. I swear I won’t call you ugly again.”

“Fine,” Hyukjae muttered and Donghae relaxed.

They went to a party together. It was just another college party with music, girls, and booze. Hyukjae didn’t like to come to these parties, especially not after he got a girlfriend in the first year of college. It’s not like he would get swayed at the very sight of s, he just didn’t want to. Their relationship is going strong even after three years of relationship. The secret behind it was Seonhee’s caring nature, Hyukjae’s maturity and their love and loyalty towards each other.

Kyuhyun was the first person he met from the basketball team at the party. The boy was chugging down drinks after drinks. Hyukjae sat with him. It was better than grinding on girls and boys like Heechul, Leeteuk, and Kangin. Yesung was also there, dancing awkwardly but still enjoying it.

Donghae also made his way to the dance floor and pleaded Hyukjae to join only to be refused vehemently.

He watched as Heechul, after dancing with a girl, found Hangeng and the two started making out. Their complicated relationship was something Hyukjae could never understand. Leeteuk and Kangin had been dancing together and no one dared to come near Yesung.

A girl had approached Donghae and he danced with her. He maintained a respectable distance. When she came too near, he stepped back. At times like this, Hyukjae was reminded why Donghae was ever his friend.

The girl lost interest in Donghae and a boy approached him. He was tall and handsome – Choi Minho. Donghae laughed and let the boy hold his waist.

Hyukjae smirked. They made a nice couple. It would be great if the two dated. Hyukjae would get Donghae off his back for some time.

After gulping a glass of beer, Hyukjae became daring and went to the dance floor. His limbs moved in a hypnotizing way with the beats of music.

It was a beautiful sight. Several boys and girls approached him but he preferred to be alone. He won’t dance with anyone unless it was his girlfriend.

Two hours passed and it was time to go home. Hyukjae started searching for Donghae who was passed out on the couch with a very drunk Kyuhyun. He lifted the boy and carried him to his car. Donghae would have to stay at his apartment for the night.

With much difficulty, he was able to drag Donghae to the car and to his place.

He shoved the barely conscious boy on the bed and huffed.

Donghae was so damn heavy.

He sat on the bed. His body demanded rest and the bed was inviting. But there was no way he was going to sleep with Donghae on the same bed. The boy was like a snake. He had a good experience from their high school when they used to have sleepovers at each other’s house. Donghae’s limbs were wound around him in an inhumane way.

He was about to get up when he was suddenly pulled back.

Donghae’s face hovered above his and he stared wide-eyed at the boy.

“D-Donghae?” He looked into Donghae’s bloodshot eyes.

“Yourrrr handsome,” the drunk boy slurred. Hyukjae smelled alcohol from his breath and tried shoving Donghae off of him. The shorter boy fell on Hyukjae, resting his head on the taller boy’s chest, listening to his steady heartbeat.

Hyukjae chuckled. “I knew you were going to stop calling me ugly but I didn’t think you’d actually call me handsome.”

“But youuuuu are han’some,” he hiccupped. “Always,”

“I’ve been hearing you call me ugly for years now. I was fine in high school but I suddenly turned ugly for you in college.” Hyukjae spoke. He wondered if Donghae was telling truth or just teasing. He only knew Donghae had a habit of passing out after drinking. He never stuck long enough to know that the boy would wake up and spew every secret about him. If that was true than it was going to be fun.

“You are ugly.” Donghae raised his head once again. “When you are with her, you a verrrry ugly. She isss. Too.” He put his head back. “Why her? Why not me?”

Those words were spoken in a whisper but Hyukjae was able to hear them. He wondered if he imagined it or not. Confusedly, he looked down at the brown hair.

“What do you mean?”

“I love you.” Donghae mumbled. “Always have. Even before she came. But you chose her.”

Hyukjae remained silent, not knowing what to say. He had no reply to that.

Before he could come up with a word, Donghae had already drifted off to a dreamland.

** **

Donghae drummed his fingers on the table as he waited for Hyukjae. They always ate lunch in the cafeteria together but Hyukjae had been avoiding that for a week now. After that party, he woke up in Hyukjae’s house with a killer hangover. Hyukjae reminded him of his promise and Donghae stopped calling him ugly after that.

Hyukjae was never ugly. He was the most handsome man in Donghae’s eyes. It was Seonhee who made him ugly. It was her who took his handsome Hyukjae away from him. He hated her so much. And he absolutely hated it when the two were together.

Hyukjae was his. That’s how it had always been until she came into the picture and took his best friend away. They used to be always glued to each other, always had each other’s backs. Hyukjae was Donghae’s world and that girl just came and destroyed his peaceful world.

He wanted to loathe Hyukjae for forgetting him and spending more of his time with that Seonhee. She always glared at him, as much as he glared at her. When Hyukjae was with her, he didn’t even notice Donghae was around.

“Hey ug-,” Donghae almost said the not-to-be-spoken word. Hyukjae flashed him a look. “Hyuk-Hyukjae.” He corrected himself. It was the first time Hyukjae had looked at him since that morning. The boy smiled unknowingly. He had no idea why he was so elated. Hyukjae only looked at him, something he hadn’t done properly and in last few days.

“I have some problems with integration. Can you tutor me?” Donghae asked.

“No,”

“Why?” Donghae was shocked. He didn’t expect the denial. Hyukjae was a nice, kind man who liked helping others. Moreover, Donghae had never been denied before, at least not because for anything study-related. It was the first time.

“I’m not free.”

“It’s just one question.” Donghae pleaded.

Hyukjae sighed. “Then ask now.”

Donghae sat back. “I-I don’t have my notebook.” He hadn’t thought Hyukjae would reject him. He had lied so that Hyukjae would tutor him later and they would spend more time together.

“Then come with your question tomorrow.” He replied.

“Why can’t come at my place today?”

“I’m not free.” Hyukjae insisted and Donghae pouted.

He won’t ever talk to Hyukjae ever again. He never had any time for Donghae recently.

** **

They didn’t talk for a whole week. It bothered Donghae how Hyukjae was so unaffected by all this. By the end of the week, he wanted to cry. And he did.

“Donghae, are you okay?” Kyuhyun inquired.

They were sitting on the benches, gazing at the baseball players running on the field. Kangin was one of them and they had gone to show him support. Hyukjae was also with them, talking happily with Sungmin. He hadn’t spared a single glance at Donghae. It was Donghae who was supposed to ignore him. He was ignoring Hyukjae. But Hyukjae was ignoring him even more. Donghae’s eyes would land on Hyukjae often, even though he refused to talk to the boy. But Hyukjae didn’t even spare him a glance.

“Yeah,” Donghae let out a shuddered breath. He hadn’t noticed that his eyes were clouded with unshed tears which he hurriedly blinked away. It was of no use though. More tears kept coming and Donghae knew they would come out in no time.

Donghae didn’t want to cry there. Not when Hyukjae was also in the same vicinity. He refused to show that boy his weakness.

“I need to piss.” Donghae added and left. Kyuhyun gave him a confused look but nodded anyway.

** **

Hyukjae stood outside one cubicle inside the washroom