Color my world

Color my world
Please Subscribe to read the full chapter

“I think he’s waking up. Call the doctor.”

 

Kyungsoo winces at the loudness of the voice, sharp pain shooting through his head at the action. He slowly opens his eyes and stares at the gray ceiling for a few seconds before closing them again. He feels tired and everything hurts like he’s been run over by a truck.

 

“Close but not really.” Another voice comments and he realizes he must have said that out loud.

 

Fingers lift his eye lids one after the other and a brighter grayness is shoved in front of them. He blinks a few times when the fingers disappear and then looks around the room. On the left side of the bed stand a girl and a boy around his age and after some squinting he recognizes them as his girlfriend and their best friend. On the opposite side there are two more people. Judging by the way they are dressed, Kyungsoo assumes they are a doctor and a nurse.

 

“Kyungsoo, you were in an accident. It was raining and your car ran off the road yesterday.” His girlfriend says slowly, squeezing his hand. “We’re in the hospital and this is your doctor.” She explains, pointing towards the older man on his right who nods and gives him a small smile before turning to the nurse and telling her a few things to write down.

 

Kyungsoo stares at them, eyes flicking between the four faces and then his eyes dart around the room frantically. He feels a lump forming at the back of his throat and fear takes over his body, making him sit up abruptly in panic. That proves to be a wrong move and he screams when a wave of searing pain hits him, causing him to slump back down and grit his teeth.

 

“Kyungsoo, calm down. You had quite a serious accident. Fortunately, there’s nothing broken but you’ve been pretty battered. You should be more careful with your movements, or it’s going to hurt a lot, like just now.” The doctor holds him down by the shoulders, trying to prevent him from squirming too much so the pain would subside faster. “Double the painkiller dosage for the next injection.” He says to the nurse and lets go of Kyungsoo to rearrange his bed so he is in a half-sitting position. “There seems to be nothing wrong other than that.”

 

“What about my eyes?” Kyungsoo asks in a shaky voice, lips trembling in worry.

 

“What’s wrong with your eyes?” The doctor frowns, leaning down to check on them again with his flashlight. He raises a questioning brow when he sees nothing wrong and Kyungsoo whimpers.

 

“Everything is gray.”

 

~~~

 

“I’m telling you, there’s nothing wrong with your eyes. We’ve run all the tests we can and found nothing.” The doctor says for the third time since he returned with the results.

 

“And I’m telling you that the only colors I’m seeing are different shades of gray, damn it!” Kyungsoo yells, hissing at the strain the action puts on his throat and neck.

 

“I understand that and I believe you. And as a doctor I’m really ashamed and sorry to say that, but the tests show nothing so there’s nothing we can do about it.”

 

“And what am I supposed to do now? Live the rest of my life without colors?” Kyungsoo grits out, fists clenching in the blanket he’s covered with.

 

“You have a head injury and the wound was pretty deep. I honestly don’t know why the tests wouldn’t show it but maybe this, let’s call it ‘color blindness’, is a result of the severe concussion you suffered. This is my first time seeing such a case and I’ve been here for more than 20 years now.” The doctor says, sounding rather unsure and Kyungsoo just wants to curl in a ball and cry until all the colors return to him. If they return…

 

“But he’ll get better, right? He’ll be able to see colors again, right?” His girlfriend asks the question he’s wanted to ask since the moment the doctor came back to his hospital room.

 

“I hope so. Like I said, the tests reveal nothing so we don’t know the cause of this problem thus there’s nothing we can do other than hope for the best.” Kyungsoo hears the finality in the doctor’s voice and sighs, carefully lying back down and closing his eyes, already sick of looking at those lifeless colors everywhere around him.

 

***

 

“We’re almost ready, honey. You should get dressed.” Kyungsoo’s mom stops by the room to inform him and then disappears again, giving him some privacy.

 

Kyungsoo gets up from the bed and walks over to the window. He sees a lot of patients walking around the small park outside the hospital and some kids playing by the small fountain. But they all look the same, only in different shades. He looks up at the sun but in his eyes it’s just an almost white stain on the otherwise light gray sky. He sighs and starts getting dressed, discarding his hospital pajamas and throwing on whatever his girlfriend has brought him. He has no idea what his clothes actually look like – just a dark gray pair of slacks and a shirt, slightly lighter in color.

 

It’s been two weeks since he woke up after the accident and though he could have left the hospital earlier the doctors insisted on keeping him there a few more days so they could observe his ‘color blindness’ a little longer, hoping they’d get to see him recover from it. Needless to say, they didn’t.

 

Kyungsoo’s gotten a little used to it, as much as you can get used to all the colors in your life being plucked out of it overnight. But there’s nothing he can do about it, so he’s kind of accepted it. He was stubborn at first, throwing random tantrums and refusing to eat, but his mom and girlfriend managed to convince him that the consequences of the car crash could have been worse and he should be grateful.

 

Physically he has already recovered, mostly. The swelling has gone down and the smaller cuts and wounds have healed. The wound on his head is yet to heal completely but at least they have removed the huge bandage that had been wrapped around his head and now he has only a small square piece of gauze over the stitches. The numerous bruises all over his body are still visible but they are on their way to fading and are no longer as frightening as they were the first time he saw himself in the mirror that day he woke up.

 

“Okay, we’re all set.” His mom appears again with a stack of papers in her hands. “You’ve been successfully discharged and we can finally get you home.”

 

“Where’s Sera?” Kyungsoo asks when he notices his mom is alone.

 

The woman walks over to the bed to put the papers away in one of the bags and grabs them before walking back to the door. “She had to go to work. She said she’d see you tonight.” His mom sighs and beckons him to follow her.

 

The frown doesn’t slip off his face during the whole ride to his apartment and he doesn’t want to be petty but he feels really ty that his girlfriend chose to go to work instead of going back home with him.

 

Yes, he’s a 26-years-old grown-up man who can take care of himself.

 

No, he doesn’t need to be babied, and actually dislikes it.

 

But apart from his inexplicable ‘color blindness’, his head injury has also caused another problem. Apparently, he has a partial memory loss, hopefully a temporary one, and can’t recall some events which have happened before the accident. It’s not too serious, he remembers his family and friends, but there’s a certain period of time before the crash that he recalls only in bits and pieces. So it would’ve been nice if his girlfriend accompanied him home and filled him in on the most important things from the last four months.

 

“Are you sure you don’t want to come home with me? Your dad would love to have you over for a few days, especially after such a serious accident.”

 

“I’ll come by, maybe tomorrow. But for now, I just want to get back to my apartment and have some time to myself, to think.” It’s probably the tenth time he says that because his mom is quite persistent and he’s prepared to repeat it a few more times but then he sees his apartment building and sighs, relieved that her time to try and convince him is finally over.

 

“Do you want me to bring those up?” The woman asks, already out of the car and ready to follow him to his apartment.

 

“I’ll manage. Thanks, mom.” He assures her, quickly snatching his bags and motioning for her to leave.

 

“Come here, honey.” She throws her arms around him and he just stands there, unable to return the hug with both his hands occupied with the bags. “You remember what the doctor said, right? You’re basically under house arrest for the next two weeks – no going back to work, no driving. And no ! Your night activities with Sera will have to wait.”

 

“Okay, I got it.” Kyungsoo groans, glancing around to check if anyone has heard that.

 

The doctor’s list of things he shouldn’t do was longer than expected but what shocked Kyungsoo more was the way he reacted to one of the things on that list, and more precisely the fact that he can’t have with his girlfriend because he found himself rather reluctant to sleep with her anyways.

 

He brushes his thoughts away and makes his way up once his mom leaves. He looks at an old concert poster inside the elevator all the way to his floor, trying to remember the colors but even when he does he can’t picture it with the gray shades staring back at him. He closes his eyes and heaves out a frustrated sigh. Although he’s accepted his current state, the grayness is slowly starting to suffocate him and he needs a breather. He needs to get better, back to the way he was before the accident, before he goes insane. At this point, he’d be grateful even for a short glimpse of color.

 

“Home, sweet home.” He mumbles when he opens the door to his apartment with the spare key they keep under the doormat because he has no idea where his own keys are.

 

He steps inside and kicks off his shoes before going further in. He hasn’t seen his apartment in two weeks and though he’s lived there since he started college almost 8 years ago he suddenly has no clue what the place looked like in colors. He’s decided to think of his new vision as a type of contact lenses which he would hopefully remove soon. Even so, however, it is still hard for him and though being outside, surrounded by people and buildings which have been voided of colors was emotionally draining, seeing his once warm apartment now covered in cold grayness is especially depressing for him.

 

He drops his bags in the bedroom and steps out onto the balcony. This used to be his favorite place because he could enjoy a great view – the bright sun surrounded by the blue ocean of the sky connecting with the busy life on the streets with all sorts of buildings decorated in lively colors. But now nothing is the same and he quickly deems the place as his least favorite in the apartment from now on.

 

Kyungsoo takes a shower, carefully keeping the wound on his head dry – doctor’s instructions. Dressed in a pair of sweats and a t-shirt, he walks in the kitchen in search of something to drink, bare feet patting against the floor. He gets a glass bottle of water from the fridge and opens the cupboard over the sink to get himself a glass. A loud gasp leaves his lips as soon as his eyes settle on a particular mug on the lower shelf and the bottle slips from his fingers, hitting the floor and shattering, the whole kitchen filling with broken glass and water.

 

“.” Kyungsoo exclaims, jumping back from the mess in shock. He quickly cleans up, gathering the pieces of glass, wiping the water away and vacuuming the floor in case there is any glass left.

 

After putting everything away he stands in front of the cupboard once again, eyes wide as they stare at the coffee mug. He blinks a few times and even rubs his eyes to make sure he’s not hallucinating because everything around him is still the same dull gray except for that one mug which practically shines. It’s white with small bright red hearts arranged to form a bigger one around the words ‘I love you’ written in black cursive. The colors pulse with life and Kyungsoo reaches for the mug, struggling to believe he’s actually seeing this. The tips of his fingers touch the letters and he’s instantly presented with a fuzzy image he does not recall.

 

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

He sits at his desk and opens a gift bag. There’s a gift box inside it with a small card attached to the lid. He turns it around and reads the words:

 

Happy birthday, Kyungsoo!

It’s a couple set, you can give

the other one to the person you love.

 

There’s no name but he smiles knowing exactly who has left it for him. He removes the lid and sees two white mugs with big red hearts formed by smaller ones, framing the words ‘I love you’ and ‘I love you more’, respectively.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

 

Kyungsoo jerks back in surprise, all the way to the counter, back pressed against it and hands gripping at the edge so hard his knuckles turn white. He stares up at the mug, trying to figure out what he just saw. Blinking several times, he concludes that it’s probably a memory but he has no recollection of such a moment. Then it’s most probably something that has happened in the period of time before his car crash which he has forgotten.

 

He remembers his birthday. It wasn’t as cold as it should be in January and work went smoothly with the pastry shop offering various discounts and free pastries in celebration and everyone congratulating him whenever he stepped out of his office. Then he took the whole staff out to treat them but left early since he had plans with his girlfriend, leaving his credit card with them, of course. And that’s pretty much everything he recalls from that day, only certain parts of the early morning and late evening missing from his memories.

 

He flops down on the floor and hugs his knees. He stays like that, eyes never leaving the mug and its colors, vibrant against the gray background. He’s been mostly angry at his state and hasn’t felt the need to cry until now. It’s at this very moment that the tears roll down his cheeks, the thoughts of never seeing the world in color again crushing him.

 

~~~

 

“Kyungsoo? What are you doing there?”

 

Kyungsoo lifts his head and looks in the direction of the voice. Sera stands several feet away from him, looking at him with worried eyes. His girlfriend drops her bag on the couch and walks to him in quick steps.

 

“Are you okay?” She asks, crouching down in front of him.

 

“I’m okay.” He mutters and pushes off the floor to get up. He looks up at the mug again and Sera follows the movement, standing up as well. “It’s a couple set. Where’s the other one?” He asks and his girlfriend’s head snaps in his direction, eyes slightly widened in shock but only for a split second before she adjusts her facial expression.

 

“I broke it.” She says and her face is a little too neutral when she reaches up and shuts the cupboard.

 

Kyungsoo feels a frown forming but prevents it from showing and only nods, leaving the kitchen right after with the excuse of being tired and going to bed early, his plans for a warm dinner with his girlfriend pushed to the back of his head for another day, when he actually feels like it.

 

***

 

It’s the third day he spends alone in the apartment. Sera has a lot of work to do and can’t stay home with him. There’s nothing interesting on TV and the apartment is completely clean, Sera doing all the housework since he isn’t allowed to overwork himself, which according to everyone around him, happens when you vacuum the carpet and mop the floor. He’s also not allowed to go out alone because of his head injury but he’s getting suffocated inside and has been craving something sweet all morning, so he’s decided to head out to the nearest store.

 

He rummages through his bags for his set of keys but it would have definitely been a lot easier if everything wasn’t the same color. He pulls out a sweatshirt he doesn’t even remember wearing when he was in the hospital and finds another thing he needs when going out – his wallet. He pockets it quickly and continues his search. He sees a small glimpse of color somewhere in the mess but it is swallowed by the rest of the stuff in less than a second.

 

Kyungsoo freezes, heart fluttering in hope inside his chest because if his eyes aren’t lying to him this would be the second time he sees anything colorful. He gets back in action and turns the bag around, spilling all of its remaining contents on the bed. A smile pulls the corners of his lips up when he sees the small brown bear key chain that his keys are attached to and his hand immediately flies out to grab it.

 

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

“This is so cute.” Kyungsoo squeals, picking the bear key chain and dangling it over his head for the other to see. “Oh, god, there’s a penguin key chain, too.” He exclaims and grabs the said key chain, bringing the two together and smiling down at them. “This is perfect. A bear for you because you like sleeping so much and a penguin for me since you say I look like one when I run. Now we switch them so you have me and I have you with me all the time.” He smiles and hands the penguin key chain to the other before attaching his bear chain to his own keys. He pays for them and grabs the hand offered to him, intertwining their fingers as they start walking again, giving his new key chain one last look and carefully pocketing it.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

 

Kyungsoo tightens his grip around the key chain and releases a shaky breath. This marks the second time he gets a flash of memory like this and now he’s sure he’s not losing his mind. He meant to tell Sera about what he saw when he touched the mug but her reaction that night made him think twice and he has decided to keep it to himself, at least for the time being. Somehow she didn’t seem too happy when he asked. Feeling apologetic for breaking the mug he’d given her would be understandable but that cold look in her eyes had him frowning until he fell asleep that night.

 

He studies the key chain closely, enjoying the brightness of the light brown bear lying in the palm of his light gray hand. He smiles at it again and cradles it to his chest as he makes his way to the door. He picks a random pair of sneakers since he can’t differentiate the colors anyways and puts them on, shooting out of the apartment seconds after he’s done tying the shoelaces. He chooses the stairs over the elevator and sprints down, suddenly a lot more energized than he’s felt for the last two and a half weeks. The mere fact of knowing he has something colorful in his pocket has him skipping down the street to the store.

 

From the corner of his eye he catches a strange flash of color in the mirror of a car parked near his apartment building. His head snaps in the direction said color should be to get reflected in the mirror but there’s nothing there, at least nothing in color, so he shrugs and resumes his skipping, deciding he feels like ice cream.

 

***

 

“You went out yesterday?” Sera raises a brow, shrugging her jacket off and moving to sit at the kitchen counter in front of him.

 

“Yes, I did.” Kyungsoo says with a proud smile, though it’s kind of silly since it’s just a five-minute walk to the store. “Today, too.” He adds, pushing a plate of apples, peeled and chopped into smaller pieces, towards his girlfriend.

 

“You seem okay, better even. I’m happy to see that but I don’t think we should tell your mom just yet.” She chuckles, biting onto a piece of apple.

 

“Agreed.” He nods and stands up to wash the knife and cutting board.

 

“I’m going to take a shower.” Sera says and he hears the clink of her keys dropping on the counter just before her steps echo down the hall to the bathroom.

 

He wipes his hands dry and goes back to the counter to get the plate of apples. He starts walking towards the couch in the living room to watch some TV but stops midway, something else catching his attention. He turns around and this time he can’t stop his face from scrunching up in a frown because Sera’s keys lie there on the counter but there is no penguin key chain and no bright colors like in his memory.

 

***

 

Kyungsoo gets out of bed as soon as he hears the front door clicking shut. He walks to the living room window and stares down at his girlfriend’s car until he sees it driving away and disappearing at the corner of the street. He feels kind of weird about what he’s about to do but something just doesn’t feel right to him and he wants to get rid of these thoughts.

 

He starts from the bookshelves in the living room. There’s a small box on each of the 6 shelves and it’s where Sera keeps various things like old jewelry, accessories, perfumes, etc. He goes through each and every one of them and when he doesn’t find what he’s looking for he moves to the second bedroom in the apartment which they turned into an office space for her. It takes him a little longer to check all the drawers in there but he still finds nothing.

 

He doesn’t particularly like what he’s doing, going through his girlfriend’s stuff like that, taking her privacy away from her. But he needs to do that to get rid of that uneasy feeling in his gut. It has been there since his first day back at the apartment. That mug seems very out of place in that cupboard. Who had even given it to him? Sera’s reaction also adds a lot of questions to the ones already in his head.

 

Then there’s the key chain. The memory is perfectly clear – him buying couple key chains and giving the penguin key chain to her. But why is he the only one who has his chain on his keys? But then the whole thing is kind of strange because why the bear? Sera doesn’t like sleeping, she’s actually the type of person who never sleeps more than necessary because she thinks it’s a waste of time and gets up early even on days she has no work. So why would he even say that? She has also never said he looks like a penguin when he runs, as far as he remembers.

 

The main problem, however, is that he doesn’t know what to believe since he doesn’t even know what he doesn’t remember. He clearly remembers the way the two of them met in college but started dating only after they graduated. He recalls their first date, first kiss, all the time they spent together, asking her to move in with him on her birthday six months ago. The gaps and blanks in his memory start around four months ago and the bits and pieces he does remember only make him more confused.

 

He enters their bedroom, the last place he can search for the key chain. First he checks the vanity table drawers but he finds only make-up products and jewelry. There’s also a desk in the room but he’s usually the one to use it. He searches it anyways, opening a drawer after drawer until he reaches the last one and it doesn’t open.

 

Kyungsoo frowns. He doesn’t remember ever locking his drawers at home. He stomps out to the kitchen, grabs his keys, hoping to find the key on the key chain, and returns to the bedroom, plopping on the floor in front of the drawers. He goes through the keys one by one: one for the apartment, one for his car, two for the pastry shop – for the front and back door respectively, one for his office, one for the locked cabinet in his office, and two more keys he does not recognize. He tries the first one and it doesn’t work. So he tries the second and the lock clicks as soon as he turns the key.

 

He looks at the contents of the drawer and finds nothing strange or suspicious enough to make him lock it. There are a few notebooks where he likes writing new recipes, his old phone in its box just like he left it when he got a new one during the Christmas holidays, one of the memories he has managed to keep from that period, a phone charger and a small dark blue velvet box.

 

He makes to close it but then he does a double take, the dark blue color screaming at him from the back of the drawer. He tenses up but not because of the color, he has kind of gotten used to random things popping up in color around him. What makes him hesitate when he reaches for the small box is that it looks much like the ones he’s seen men proposing with and somehow that doesn’t feel right to him. He grabs it nonetheless.

 

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

“See for yourself.” A man says and places the box in Kyungsoo’s palm. He opens it and his eyes are met with two silver bands, similar in size, with a simple and clean design. “Everything is the way you wanted it.” The man assures him and Kyungsoo smiles, running a finger over the two rings.

 

“Perfect.”

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

 

“Couple rings.” Kyungsoo lets out a relieved sigh after the flashback fades out. He opens the box and studies the rings, his brows knitting in confusion because they are not even the type of jewelry Sera likes. He remembers her saying once that if he was going to get them couple rings she’d like to be there because she’s very particular about her jewelry. And this very pair of couple rings is just what Kyungsoo likes, but nothing that Sera would ever wear.

 

~~~

 

“Yes, we made these.” The man nods, giving Kyungsoo a once over and humming. “I remember you. You came by like a month ago.”

 

“I did?” Kyungsoo asks, eyes widening in surprise but then he snorts at his own reaction because of course he came here. “I did, yes.”

 

“So what’s the problem? Don’t tell me you guys broke up and you’re here to return the rings? You were so happy the day you came to pick them up that you practically skipped out of here.”

 

“No, it’s not that. I just looked at them today and wondered why I chose such a design when my girlfriend wouldn’t even like it.” Kyungsoo sighs, wondering if maybe Sera actually came with him and was the one to choose the rings.

 

“But you picked it right away and said it was the perfect design for the two of you.” The man gives him a confused look and Kyungsoo can’t help but mirror it.

 

“I said that?” His frown deepens and he looks at the rings once again.

 

“Yes.” The guy narrows his eyes at Kyungsoo suspiciously and crosses his arms over his chest. “And, just so you know, a full refund won’t be possible because of the engravings.”

 

“Engravings?” Kyungsoo asks, already pulling the rings out of the box and turning them around. It takes him less than a second to spot what he’s looking for. It’s a letter-heart-letter pattern on the inside of both rings - K©J on one and J©K on the other. A loud gasp leaves his lips and he drops the rings on the counter and leaps back in shock.

 

“Hey, man? What’s wrong? You look like you’ve seen a ghost or something.” The man questions warily, rearranging the rings back in their places inside the box.

 

“I-I have to go.” Kyungsoo croaks out, grabbing the small box, and stumbles out of the jewelry shop. He takes a few steps down the street and stops, staring ahead in the gray sea of people. His mind rapidly fills with doubt, doubt in himself and his loyalty, doubt in his relationship.

 

Was he cheating? He probably was. There’s no other explanation. How serious was it for him to prepare couple rings with such care? More serious than his relationship with Sera since the two of them have been dating for almost three years now and they were yet to get couple rings? Were the couple mugs and key chains even for him and Sera? Does she know about this?

 

His brain burns with all the questions boiling inside it, but he’s momentarily distracted by another glimpse of color. Colors – lots of them. He follows the pulsing trace and his eyes fall on a person, crossing the street a few feet away from him. It’s like he’s the only one living in the pool of dead figures. It’s a boy around Kyungsoo’s age, maybe younger, and he’s in color from head to toe – dark brown hair, bronze skin, black and red hoody, light blue jeans and white sneaker with black and blue patterns.

 

Kyungsoo’s feet move before he can even comprehend the situation and he’s running after the boy who is already on the other side of the street and turning a corner. He picks up the pace and gets a few angry honks when he runs across the street after the traffic lights have turned green. He feels slightly dizzy by the time he turns the same corner and he’s so not supposed to be running with that head injury but he can still see a bit of the colors at the end of the street and he follows them desperately.

 

When the dizziness increases and he feels like he might faint he stops running and leans on the wall of a nearby building, closing his eyes for a moment and taking a deep breath. Once he opens them again the colors are gone and he curses as he relaxes against the coldness of the wall and comes to terms with the fact that he has lost the boy.

 

***

 

“No.”

 

“Mom, I’m fine.” Kyungsoo repeats for the umpteenth time since he called the woman.

 

“It’s too early Kyungsoo. The doctor said two weeks.” His mom argues back again and he feels like throwing his phone out of the window because she just wouldn’t listen to him.

 

“And it’s been a long and boring one, mom. I can’t do this anymore. I’m suffocating inside the apartment.” He groans, looking around the empty apartment and tapping his fingers on the kitchen counter in annoyance.

 

“Kyungsoo, honey-”

 

“I need to get back to work, mom. I need to do something, to distract myself. I’m alone with my thoughts all day and I feel like I’m going crazy.” Kyungsoo doesn’t like whining but it’s what works with his mom, usually, so he has no other choice. There’s silence on the other end and he’s almost accepted his defeat when his mom finally agrees.

 

“Fine, if that’s what you want. But no overworking, okay? Just come by, stay a few hours, keep an eye on the staff. No actual work, you hear me?”

 

“I hear you.” He chuckles, satisfied that his secret weapon has worked once again.

 

It may seem strange that a 26-year-old man has to ask his mom for permission to go back to work but that’s what happens when you work at your mom’s luxurious pastry shop. He actually tried to go earlier in the day but his mom has apparently decided to run the place in his absence and was there, watching the place like a hawk from his office on the upper floor so there was absolutely no way for him to sneak inside. And he didn’t feel like getting scolded in public, especially in front of his staff, so he just returned home and decided to get an official permission before going back to the shop.

 

“You’re going back to work?” Sera’s voice comes from the entrance of the kitchen and Kyungsoo stiffens.

 

“Yeah, I guess.” He mumbles, ending the call and putting his phone down.

 

“That’s great. I’m glad your mom has approved.” She gives him a small smile and walks past the counter and into their bedroom.

 

Kyungsoo stares down at the counter the whole time, not daring to lift his head and look at her. Guilt is eating him up, has been since he visited the jewelry shop yesterday. Sera couldn’t come home last night because she had too much work to do and it is their first time together in the same space after he found out he had been cheating on her.

 

It’s only now, when such thoughts have filled his head, that he notices how distant and cold she’s been ever since he woke up after the accident. Does she know about his affair? Does she know who the person is? Does she feel betrayed? Angry? Or is she just as clueless as Kyungsoo and relying only on the signs of them growing apart.

 

“Kyungsoo?”

 

He lifts his head at the sound of his name and their eyes meet for the first time in two, maybe three days. She looks tired but that’s just normal because her work is tiring. She looks confused, probably by his reaction, and it seems so normal like she’s just his girlfriend, waiting patiently for him to respond, knowing nothing of his betrayal.

 

“Yeah?” He says after a while and she starts walking closer but stops abruptly and there’s a change in her expression but he fails to catch the emotions that run over it.

 

“I asked if you’ll be at work the whole day tomorrow.”

 

“I guess so, yeah.” He runs a hand through his hair, thinking that maybe that would be a good idea – burying himself in work despite his mom’s warnings.

 

“Don’t forget to free your evening. It’s Jaehyun’s gallery opening.” She reminds him and disappears inside the bathroom even before he can respond.

 

***

 

“Kyungsoo!” Two voices call out at the same time and Kyungsoo has no time to react before he is stuck in a bone crushing hug, attacked from both sides.

 

“You guys remember I’m a patient, right?” He chuckles and it turns into laughter when the two boys jump away from him, simultaneously looking his body up and down for injuries.

 

“You look a lot better than I expected. I knew we shouldn’t believe your mom too much.” Baekhyun narrows his eyes at him and snorts.

 

“Yeah, well, you could have called to check in on me.” Kyungsoo crosses his arms over his chest and glares at them.

 

“Call where?”

 

“Right, I lost my phone in the car crash. I got a new one but I’ll go ahead and assume that my mom refused to give you my number so you wouldn’t bother me while I recover.” Kyungsoo guesses and the two boys gasp, Baekhyun covering his mouth in shock.

 

“She even used the exact same words!” Chanyeol exclaims and Baekhyun agrees with a series of rapid nods.

 

“So, you’re here early.” Baekhyun comments as he and Chanyeol get back to preparing the first batch of pastries for the day, the former in charge of decorating cookies while the latter does the same with the muffins. That’s how their pastry shop works – whoever has the first shift in the morning prepares the first batches of pastries and when the next shift takes over in the kitchen they go out into the shop and serve customers, keeping that rotation throughout the day.

 

The pastry shop is a two-story building in close proximity to a few high schools and a University campus so the place is rarely empty and the busiest hours of the day are working hours for the whole staff, totaling up to 9 people including Kyungsoo – four in the kitchen, two at the counter and three serving customers. Kyungsoo used to work in the kitchen with the rest of the boys but when his dad opened a new restaurant his mom decided to go there instead and left the pastry shop in Kyungsoo’s hands just a little after his college graduation.

 

“Yeah, I was going crazy doing nothing back home. I couldn’t even sleep much last night because I was too excited to…” Kyungsoo’s words die in his throat when he finally looks around the kitchen, eyes running over the shelves and cupboards.

 

“Oh, yeah. Your mom told us about…you know.” Chanyeol mumbles, awkwardly glancing from him to Baekhyun.

 

“It was Kai’s idea. But we all helped.” Baekhyun smiles proudly and clamps a hand on Kyungsoo’s shoulder, throwing Chanyeol a quick look before asking the question that’s probably been eating the two of them since the moment Kyungsoo walked in the kitchen. “Do you really, like, see no colors?”

 

Kyungsoo ignores the question and continues to stare. In the three weeks he’s been unable to go to the pastry shop he didn’t even for a second think about how his strange color blindness could affect his work. Never did it cross his mind that he might have a hard time finding things around the kitchen like different ingredients or types of plates, bowls, pans, etc. But it looks like he doesn’t really need to worry about that because apparently someone else has thought about it instead of him.

 

“Who’s Kai?” He asks, brows twitching in confusion when he fails to put a face to the name of the person who has come up with the idea of attaching a sticky note to every single thing in the kitchen with either its name or color.

 

“What do you mean ‘who’s Kai’?” Baekhyun asks with wide eyes and Kyungsoo notices Chanyeol giving him the same shocked look. He shrugs his shoulders, making the two boys gasp again. “Maybe you’re not that well after all.”

 

“You know Kai. He’s the newest waiter. You picked him yourself back in December, remember?” Chanyeol says slowly and looks at him expectantly.

 

“I did?” Kyungsoo asks, surprised because he usually lets Suho pick the waiters.

 

“You’ve also been helping him learn how to actually make the pastries.” Baekhyun adds and Kyungsoo frowns, trying to remember anything but it just makes his head hurt.

 

“Your mom did mention you might have a problem recalling certain things but, wow, I never thought you’d forget a whole person.” Chanyeol shakes his head a little and returns to his muffins.

 

“Yeah, me neither.” Kyungsoo bites his lip and busies himself with reading the sticky notes.

 

~~~

 

Kyungsoo leaves his office and greets the customers on the second floor of the pastry shop before walking down the stairs and towards the counter. He catches a glimpse of Suho and Baekhyun preparing a batch of eclairs in the kitchen while bickering about something. Chanyeol is at the counter and Sehun is just returning after taking an order from a group of girls. He drops his notebook in front of Chanyeol and the taller starts piling pastries on the plates.

 

“Are you leaving already?” Sehun asks him while arranging the plates Chanyeol hands him on the tray.

 

“Yeah, I’ll be heading home.” Kyungsoo nods, handing Sehun four sets of napkins and forks.

 

“Why? You’re not feeling well?” Suho emerges from the kitchen with a tray of the sweet eclairs and places it in the showcase.

 

“I thought you wanted to meet Kai. His shift starts in an hour.” Baekhyun’s head pops out from the kitchen.

 

“I do, but I have plans. I guess I’ll meet him tomorrow.” Kyungsoo sighs and pulls his buzzing phone out of his pocket. It’s a call from Sera and he internally curses after realizing he’s kind of late already.

 

~~~

 

The gallery opening is just as boring as Kyungsoo expected, maybe even more. They arrived almost an hour ago and not only that he’s yet to see his friend but his girlfriend’s been missing for the last fifteen minutes. He downs the rest of his champagne and hands his empty glass to one of the waiters.

 

Kyungsoo isn’t really into paintings, unlike his mom who regularly visits various galleries and buys artworks, several of which are displayed in the pastry shop. He doesn’t remember Sera being particularly into arts either, but she’s been very excited about this gallery opening. The owner is their best friend from college and one of the artists whose works are part of the exhibition is also Sera’s high school classmate.

 

He walks around the gallery and notices that it’s divided into sections with each one displaying a different artist’s works. Another 15 minutes later he’s gone through four of the sections and has so far concluded that he likes the paintings of people and landscapes best. His girlfriend finds him at the entrance of the fifth section and silently walks beside him for a few more minutes before another person joins them.

 

“I’ve been looking all over for you, guys.” Jaehyun’s voice reaches Kyungsoo’s ears and he peels his eyes away from a painting of a couple sitting at a beach and looking up at the sky which has caught his attention though the grayness doesn’t really tell him if it’s daytime or nighttime.

 

By the time he turns around Sera and Jaehyun are hugging and the boy barks out a loud lough before pulling away from the hug. Kyungsoo freezes. His eyes are immediately drawn to the black and silver striped tie falling over his best friend’s chest. It stands out against the boy’s otherwise devoid of colors outfit and Kyungsoo gets an uneasy feeling in his gut.

 

“Kyungsoo, I’m glad you made it. I’m sorry I haven’t been able to come visit you. How are you feeling?” Jaehyun says and throws his arms around him. Kyungsoo takes the opportunity and sneaks his hand in between them to wrap his fingers around the smooth fabric of the tie.

 

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

Happy One Month Anniversary!!!

Wear me to the Valentine’s Day party tomorrow, please~

 

Kyungsoo laughs at the note and picks up the black rectangular box from his desk. He unties the silver ribbon and removes the lid to see a striped tie in the same colors.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

 

The image blurs for a second and he in a breath when it morphs into a new one.

Please Subscribe to read the full chapter

Like this story? Give it an Upvote!
Thank you!

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
BehnazYB
#1
Chapter 1: Can't believe the nerve of sera for trying to break them apart -_- good thing they got back together :) thanks for sharing this amazing story with us and good job author nim
PrithyD
#2
Chapter 1: Wow... This is so beautiful and well written
nounoukaisoo #3
Chapter 1: AAAASCVHJJMKK I'M IN LOVE!!!!!!❤❤❤ i really really enjoyed reading, from the unique plot of ksoo only seeing colors related to ji, to all the suspense to know what happened before the accident, the beautiful way you wrote how ksoo figured out everything, to kaisoo's sweet love story!!! I read it all in one go without blinking? Thank you for the beautiful story i really enjoyed every second
sookai-
#4
Chapter 1: wow this is an amazing story! very kyungsoo-centric but i like the different aspects about the plot i.e. kyungsoo has a girlfriend and usually fics always go with boyfriend which gets quickly overused. and the pregnancy and the problems in relationship, everything was plausible, too c: and yay kaisoo <3 thanks for writing this amazing story ~
Aysan6188 #5
Chapter 1: Well written and incredibly lovely.thank you so much
Rikasan #6
Chapter 1: Ahhhhhhhh sooooo goooood!! I love how you describe things so detailed. And Kaisoo <3
LeaderLiCiXD
#7
Chapter 1: Thanks for this. So beautiful
Stay well ?