Paper Cuts, Final
Paper Cuts
Chanyeol stepped out of the dark, cool night and into the quiet diner. The little bell above the door let out a ring with his entry. He wiped his shoes on the mat and headed to the counter.
The diner is quiet, its after midnight. Chanyeol’s never tried this one before. Another customer sits at the bar and Chanyeol picks a spot two seats down.
The waitress comes by and Chanyeol orders his favorite slice of pie. It’s quiet while he waits. He glances two seats over at the blonde leaning over his own piece of pie. The stranger seems more interested in picking at the food than actually eating it.
“Pie is usually more fun to eat, you know,” Chanyeol offers casually. The blonde looks up through hair that has grown a little too long in front.
“Yeah, guess I wasn’t as hungry as I thought,” the blonde said quietly after a moment. He picks at the pie again as Chanyeol’s piece is brought to him by the waitress. Chanyeol thanks her and takes a bite. He glances back at the quiet blonde. He was quite attractive – red lips, button nose. But there was something about his expression; Chanyeol couldn’t quite place it.
Chanyeol talks a bit more, mostly just getting nods from the other. When the blonde starts paying and grabbing his coat, Chanyeol does the same and walks out after the blonde. Life is about taking chances.
“Which way are you headed,” Chanyeol asks. The blonde stops and turns around before pointing down the street. Chanyeol’s place is in another direction but he tells the other he’s going the same way. They begin walking.
“What’s your name, by the way?,” Chanyeol asks in the silence.
“Baekhyun. What’s yours?,” the blonde answers.
“Chanyeol. Nice to meet you,” Chanyeol cheerily replies. The blonde, Baekhyun, simply nods without looking over. Chanyeol cleared his throat. Either this guy wasn’t very talkative or wasn’t interested in his company.
“Sorry I disturbed your pie eating, but you did look kinda lonely,” Chanyeol tries again.
“You were alone too,” Baekhyun shrugs.
Ok. This was going to be harder than he thought.
Chanyeol decides to chat about this and that, something he’s pretty good at. As they walk, he continues blabbering on about nothing and Baekhyun mostly nods or says ‘uh huh’. Chanyeol notices him staring at the ground or the sky over and over again. Chanyeol frowns; he seemed lost somehow. But Chanyeol doesn’t even know him so who is he to mention it?
“This is my apartment building,” Baekhyun stops. Chanyeol turns to his new acquaintance.
“Well, it was nice to meet you,” Chanyeol flashed a sincere smile. “Take it easy, huh?”
“Yeah,” Baekhyun blinks at the shiny smile.
Chanyeol watches as the blonde starts up the barely lit stairs towards his apartment before turning around and heading back the way they came.
Baekhyun notices.
…
Baekhyun closes his apartment door behind him and locks it like normal. He looks around the messy place, thinking about how little energy he’s had to do any cleaning. It stresses him out to think about it.
He sits on the couch and leans his head back, staring at the ceiling. A small lamp is the only light.
He had a plan for tonight. One last time out to his favorite place for his favorite piece of pie. One last moment on this planet to exist in.
He leans forward and picks up the bottle of pills on the coffee table and rolls it between his fingers, thinking, before setting it back down and staring at it for a moment. He picks up a notebook and a pen, reads what is already written and brings the pen up to continue. He stares at the page but isn’t seeing it.
He thinks of Chanyeol, the stranger from the diner tonight. He was chatty. He had a nice smile. He walked Baekhyun home by lying about where he lived. Baekhyun’s lip pulled up the slightest bit into a half smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes.
Baekhyun put the notebook down and pushed it away with the pen before setting it down. Maybe tonight isn’t the night.
…
Baekhyun isn’t sure what compels him. It’s like being lost in a fog and for some reason wanting to repeat the steps before. Like somehow the outcome might be different, like he could be outside himself and see himself doing something repetitively. He decides to go out for pie the following night.
The bell above the door dings as Baekhyun walks in. He’s so focused on his own world that he stops in shock when he sees that smile coming from the counter. That’s how he finds himself ordering a full dinner, sitting across from Chanyeol in a booth.
Baekhyun mostly watches while Chanyeol eats happily. Its quiet between them. Chanyeol doesn’t seem to feel the need to be as chatty tonight. Baekhyun knows it would be polite to try to keep a conversation going but he doesn’t really have anything to say, he thinks. Instead he watches with removed amusement. There’s something about this guy that he can’t figure out; he doesn’t fit into Baekhyun’s world right now.
And so he finds himself walking together with Chanyeol again in the dark cold night. The quiet between them continues as they walk, the night turning colder as the wind picks up.
Suddenly Chanyeol stops and grabs Baekhyun’s sleeve to stop him.
“Hold up. There’s something I want to go see. Come with me. It will only take a minute,” Chanyeol says as he heads down a different street.
Baekhyun follows Chanyeol, a little curious and a lot tired, that kind of tired that comes with the internal fog. He slowly raises his head as Chanyeol stops ahead of him. Has he never seen this viewpoint before? He stands in awe.
The sidewalk gives way to a very small park with just a single bench. It overlooks the river and a bridge. The city sprawls out across the other side of the river and the sounds seem far away.
Chanyeol leans his forearms on the fence and looks out. He notices Baekhyun standing a ways back and sighs in feigned annoyance. He grabs Baekhyun’s sleeve and drags him over to lean on the fence with him.
They stand, leaning forward, watching the city, looking at the moon. It’s cold. Baekhyun realizes that Chanyeol has leant over so that their arms are touching. Baekhyun shifts the tiniest bit away to add some space.
“It’s the anniversary of my mom’s death. Cancer,” Chanyeol states rather matter-of-fact. “When I come here I think of her and somehow I just feel better.”
Baekhyun watches his face in the moonlight while he talks. Slowly he feels himself float back into his own body. He finally feels like he’s in the moment again. Chanyeol catches him staring and they both quickly look back out over the water.
“Thank you for sharing. I’m sorry about your mom,” Baekhyun offers. A silence lingers before Baekhyun speaks again, somehow spurred on, even though he doesn’t know why.
“You asked me what I was going to do with the rest of my night yesterday,” Baekhyun continues, looking over the
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