-fin.
Why?
Sooyoung, a stressed university student sighed as she saw her younger sister sprawled, sleeping on their living room’s floor again. She undoubtedly loved Hyejoo, but sometimes she questioned herself what kind of heinous acts have she committed in her past life to be punished by having a weird sister. She would say that weird would be an understatement, but her girlfriend Jiwoo who adored Hyejoo so much would definitely hate that. For Jiwoo, Hyejoo was just a cute kid having her emo-phase. She believed it would eventually pass, it was nothing worrisome. Sooyoung was about to wake up the sleeping girl when Jiwoo grabbed her shirt causing her to stop on her tracks.
“Let our baby rest. School must have tired her out.” Jiwoo carefully approached the sleeping girl, trying not to create any noise.
Jiwoo sat at the floor, softly humming as she caressed Hyejoo’s hair. Sooyoung found it adorable how her girlfriend cared a lot about her beloved younger sister. She started thinking that perhaps her girlfriend was right, Hyejoo was just a cute kid. A kind, innocent, pure-
“Can you cry underwater?” Jiwoo almost yelped when Hyejoo suddenly started talking out of nowhere.
“Uhm, hi baby wolf?” Confused and not knowing what to answer, Jiwoo resorted to greeting the younger girl.
“If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?” Hyejoo continued asking weird questions without changing her position, she was still sprawled on the floor.
“Why is “Yves” pronounced as “Eve”? Hyejoo stood up and seriously asked, adorning a blank face.
“Is Jinsol-unnie a natural blonde? Wouldn’t she go bald soon if she keeps on dyeing her hair?” Hyejoo squinted her eyes as she imagined what could happen to the said girl’s hair.
“Well, that’s a valid question.” Jiwoo nodded in agreement, thinking about the well-being of their friend’s hair.
“Right, Poor Jinsol- No, I mean, Jiwooming don’t tolerate her!” Sooyoung was about to lose her patience. She has seen her sister grew up throughout the years, yet she could never completely fathom what’s going on inside her head.
Hyejoo is not your usual noisy kid who was full of energy and enthusiasm. Maybe at some point she used to be like that, but it would be a story for another time.
Nowadays, she resembled a grumpy old woman; completely done with her life and was most likely to grow old with cats that were as hateful as her. She was undeniably an odd kid, but lately she has been asking too much weird questions.
“I know how much of an emo you are, but have you finally lost it? I’m not getting paid enough for this.” Sooyoung just facepalmed upon realizing the predicament she was currently facing. She was getting frustrated with Hyejoo’s onslaught of random questions.
“But unnie, don’t you wonder-”
“NO, I DON’T WONDER AT ALL. IN FACT, I DON’T EVEN WANT TO THINK ANYMORE SO NOPE. NOT HAPPENING HYEJOO, JUST NO.” Sooyoung relentlessly uttered without hitching her breath. Jiwoo thought it was impressive; she thought the older girl was already perfect enough with her considerate personality, stunning looks and talent in dancing. She has never imagined that her girlfriend has a hidden talent in rapping. Not the best time to be impressed, but Jiwoo is Jiwoo. Completely whipped and totally gay for Sooyoung. (a/n: tbh same lol)
“Okay cool rap, but unnie–”
“SON HYEJOO! DON’T MAKE ME THROW YOU AWAY!” Sooyoung shouted before her younger sister could finish what she was saying.
“Sooyoungie, chill out. Don’t be so harsh with our baby wolf. Try to be more understanding.” Jiwoo clinged on to Sooyoung’s arm, trying to calm down her fuming girlfriend.
“Remember when you were also on that teenage phase and you were about to fight everyone, because you insisted your unrealistic dream of marrying Sunmi?” After hearing what Jiwoo said, a blush crept upon Sooyoung’s face.
“It’s not my fault that Sunmi is such a great idol.” Embarassed, Sooyoung tried defending herself as she awkwardly looked down on the floor.
“Are you saying that Sunmi is better than Jiwooming? :( ” Knowing that she got the older girl wrapped around her finger, Jiwoo pulled off a convincingly-cute sad face.
Sooyoung visibly panicked, not knowing what to do. Hyejoo would refer to her as “whipped”, but that was already an established unspoken fact. Of course, she was whipped for her girlfriend who seemed to rob the sun off its job. Her beloved Jiwoo was a literal ball of sunshine, and there was no way Sooyoung could ever last another second seeing a frown on the usually cheerful girl’s face.
“Noooo. I’ll choose you over Sunmi anytime. For me, you’re incomparable to anyone. You’re the best, you’ve always been.” At this point, Sooyoung’s eyes were already beaming with love and adoration for Jiwoo. Hyejoo simply squinted her eyes in disapproval of the cheesy love declaration that her older sister just did.
"Uhm, I appreciate the chuuves content, but I thought this story is about me?"
"Baby wolf, what-
Anyway, as I've been saying earlier; I think Hyejoo needs to interact with more people."
"I appreciate the concern, thank you very much. I have friends though."
"...."
".....? :D"
"Okay. Lil sis, let's have a reality check. Asides from my gorgeous girlfriend Jiwooming and my questionable group of friends, who else are you friends with?"
"Yer-"
"No, Yerim doesn't count either. She's our cousin, dealing with you is more of an unwanted responsibility for her. Trust me, I've been there and unfortunately still there. Of course, she doesn't complain about it because she's a nice girl. "
"Babe, did you just call your sister an unwanted responsibility?" Jiwoo raised her eyebrows visibly showing her dislike of Sooyoung's choice of words.
"I mean, I'm technically correct-"
"HA SOOYOUNG!"
"...."
"Okay, okay. I get it, I'm sorry. So, what do you suggest?" Sooyoung defeatedly sighed as she laid down on Jiwoo's lap. Jiwoo pondered for a while, using her remaining brain cells to formulate possible ideas.
"How about having her spend time with Jinsol's sister?" Jiwoo suddenly stood up, believing that she had just uttered the most brilliant idea ever.
"That sassy blonde? Chaewon? Well, Hyejoo said before that she finds her pretty c-" Hyejoo abruptly covered Sooyoung's mouth.
"She means, uhm pretty clumsy." Hyejoo awkwardly said, not removing her hand covering her older sister's mouth. Sooyoung struggled from Hyejoo's grip, but Jiwoo found the supposedly emo-kid's reaction too amusing to even bother asking if Sooyoung was still breathing.
The idea of Hyejoo and Chaewon together would be interesting. Perhaps, she has discovered the perfect cure for their baby wolf's lack of interest with humans. She definitely liked where this was going.
Hyejoo was nervous.
She was waiting for Jinsol's sister at a coffee shop as instructed by Sooyoung and Jiwoo. A week passed since Jiwoo brought up Jinsol's younger sister. It has been a week of constant bickering between Hyejoo and Sooyoung. Hyejoo kept on insisting that she was fine on her own.
"But I've always been a solo player, a lone wolf! I'm a strong independent woman who needs no man-"
"Ya! Son Hyejoo! Chaewon is a woman, and no more buts! Unless you want me to smash the wifi router. Bye bye to League of Legends, perhaps?"
"...."
"Stop being dramatic and meet her at least once!"
"But duos are for noobs!"
The siblings kept on bantering for a whole week. Sooyoung had to bring up all the threats she could muster just to convince her younger sister to give it a shot. Jiwoo, being the lovely girl she was, opted to bribing Hyejoo rather than using violent threats.
"I don't know anything about games or that League of Gays or something-"
"IT'S LEAGUE OF LEGENDS."
"Close enough. Anyway, if you hang out with Chaewon at least once; I'd buy you any video game you want."
Hyejoo would never trust her own sister; but since it was Jiwoo who was offering, she finally yielded. The things she does for her love of games, being a gamer certainly knows no boundaries.
And that has brought her into this awkward situation. Stuck at a random coffee shop, jittery looking around the place. Sooyoung and Jiwoo seated across the table, talking about penguins as if this whole hanging-out-with-Jinsol's-sister was not their idea.
Why are they even here? Heck, why am I even here?
Sooyoung and Jiwoo were still busy discussing the possibility of flying penguins when Hyejoo noticed a figure standing outside the cafe; bearing the familiar shade of blonde hair she had clowned a lot of times in the past. Except, this time the figure looked considerably shorter?
"Hey, did Jinsol-unnie suddenly shrink??"
"What-"
Hyejoo's statement made Sooyoung and Jiwoo direct their gaze outside. There they saw their friend Jinsol, sporting a new hair color; accompanied by a blonde, notably shorter than her. For a moment, they questioned whether their eyes were playing tricks on them. Their very own Jinsol, who had been dying her hair blonde for two consecutive years has finally dyed it back to black.
"BLACK-HAIRED JINSOL??"
"I'VE NEVER THOUGHT I'D LIVE UP TO THIS DAY. HA SOOYOUNG, I LOVE YOU BUT I COULD PEACEFULLY DIE NOW."
Sooyoung and Jiwoo exclaimed. Being the dramatic gay she has always been, Jiwoo even stood up from her seat and acted like she was about to pass out. Hyejoo, suffering from second-hand embarrassment just desperately wanted to escape and forever forget that she was related to these shameful women. She could not exactly blame them for crumbling under black-haired Jinsol's power though, because honestly who wouldn't?
"Such a warm welcome, guys."
"Maybe "gays" would be a more fitting word for your friends, unnie." Chaewon raised her eyebrows in amusement.
"Remind me, why do I have to be associated with these humans?"
"Hey there baby wolf! Uhm, because Sooyoung is your biological sister?"
"Yeah, unfortunately. Ow, great hair Jinsol-unnie."
Jinsol and Chaewon joined their table, Hyejoo just sipped her coffee quietly and observed the other girls. Sooyoung and Jiwoo were still on a daze, disbelief etched all over their face as they stared at Jinsol.
"What has brought up the idea of finally dying your hair back to black?"
"Because her crush told her that it would definitely suit her." Chaewon smirked, exposing her older sister has always been fun for her.
Jinsol became a stuttering mess, trying to deny her younger sister's accusation. Sooyoung and Jiwoo further , eventually making her spill the beans about her aforementioned crush.
Hyejoo remained silent, not intending to join the noisy conversation. The situation is too overwhelming for her. It would have been fine if it was just her usual unnies, but today they were with Chaewon.
Hyejoo has always been a shy kid, she was not particularly good with meeting new people. Asides from her cousin Yerim, the few people she occasionally talked to are Sooyoung’s friends. Hyejoo did not have the audacity to call them her friends, she firmly believed that those kind unnies were just willing to talk to her because of Sooyoung.
What am I supposed to do? It’s not like I could suddenly act chummy with a gorg- uhm I mean, stranger. Heck, why would she even agree to this ridiculous hang out idea??
"Going back to our original purpose here, let me introduce my younger sister. This is Son Hyejoo, you could adopt her if you want-"
"HA SOOYOUNG!" Jiwoo glared at Sooyoung. She would not let anyone slander Hyejoo's name on her watch, not even her own girlfriend.
“Aw, how cute. They are like an old married couple as usual. Now I feel like we’re on a marriage meeting for our daughters, and I’m that single parent who had to raise her daughter alone through the years and now I’m about to give her away.” Supposedly wiping her tears, Jinsol tapped her younger sister’s shoulder. Chaewon just rolled her eyes. Nonetheless, she giggled with her older sister’s shenanigans.
Hyejoo mindlessly smiled, she was not sure if it was due to Jinsol’s antics or due to Chaewon’s cute laugh. She knew that it was most likely the latter, but she would never admit that.
"Hello. I'm Park Chaewon, Jinsol-unnie's pure, innocent and amazing younger sister. The world is mine, and y'all are just living in it." Chaewon smugly said.
"Awwy. My sister is really cute, right?" Jinsol being the supportive older sister she has always been, clapped at Chaewon's introduction. Sooyoung and Jiwoo briefly glanced at each other, questioning whether they have made the right call on introducing Chaewon to Hyejoo. They wanted Hyejoo to have a new friend in order to be more normal. No one expected that the said new friend would be, to put it generously-unique.
Hyejoo discreetly stood up from her seat, intending to get a refill of her coffee. Unbeknownst to her, Chaewon was aware and has been noting Hyejoo's actions for some time now. Her staring was not as blatant as Hyejoo's, but she could not deny that she was kind of baffled by the girl's reserved attitude.
Her eyes held so much power in them, as if she was staring through a person's soul. Intimidating would be a perfect word to describe her, yet she was wielding a child-like voice. Her smile, showcasing how attractive she was, could make anyone squeal. Hyejoo was alluring, and Chaewon was immensely captured by it. For Chaewon, Hyejoo exuded so much mystery; leaving her wanting to know more about the girl.
"Hey." Hyejoo looked back upon hearing a small voice behind her. She did not expect Chaewon to follow her to the counter. She thought Chaewon must have come to place her order, her weird instincts made Hyejoo suddenly moved out of the way.
You haven’t changed at all.
Chaewon just raised her eyebrows in amusement, stifling a giggle as she saw how quickly Hyejoo moved more than a meter away from her. Hyejoo spaced out, tilted her head in confusion; then blushed profusely as she realized what she has done.
"I'm sorry-"
"Wanna go elsewhere?" Chaewon asked. Before Hyejoo could even think of a reply, the blonde girl grabbed her hand and led them outside the café.
Hyejoo should be worrying about being scolded for leaving without notice, but all she could ever think about was the warm hand grasping hers.
What happened to hating human interaction??
Chaewon let go of Hyejoo's hand, the other girl frowned at the sudden loss of the comforting warmth. The frown was soon replaced by excitement as she saw where Chaewon brought her. Varying games scattered and the familiar view of people huddled over games, the arcade has always been her favorite place.
Chaewon found it endearing how Hyejoo's reserved attitude seemingly collapsed as they played different games. Chaewon learned four things about Hyejoo. (1) She was shy around strangers, but she would not hesitate to play against anyone. Yes, even against little kids. (2) She was good at all games; it was almost impossible to beat her. She surpassed all the existing high-scores by a large difference. (3) She has a unique and beautiful voice. Chaewon suggested that they should sing at the small karaoke booth located at the less populated part of the arcade. Hyejoo rejected the idea, but soon gave in after Chaewon's mocking.
"You can't sing? Maybe you're just afraid that you will lose to me. It's okay, I understand."
Chaewon realized afterwards that she should not have said that. Hyejoo could definitely sing, and Chaewon wished she could forever listen to Hyejoo's singing.
(4) Lastly, Hyejoo was competitive; and so was Chaewon.
That was what brought them into their last game. Chaewon proudly boasted about how she was about to beat Hyejoo. She confidently declared that racing games are her forte.
"You're on my turf now, there's no way I'd lose!"
To further pumped them up, they agreed that the loser would have to treat the winner ice cream from the nearby ice cream parlor. Surprisingly, Chaewon was not joking when she said that she was good at racing games. Unfortunately for her, the second fact she discovered about Hyejoo was indisputable. It was almost impossible to beat her. Almost.
Hyejoo would have won, but she decided to purposely fail her drift at the last turn towards the goal, then said "Tsk, I messed up". Chaewon happily jumped and hugged Hyejoo. Hyejoo was shocked with the sudden hug, but it was not like she was complaining about it. The lighting in the arcade made it less obvious that Hyejoo was blushing furiously. Again, she disliked human interaction, but maybe she liked that hug a little. Yeah, a little.
"I want vanilla!" Chaewon cheerfully said. They have only known each other for a few hours, yet Hyejoo felt so much happiness with the other's company. It could even surpass the happiness she felt when Sooyoung slipped on ice last winter. That was probably not much to compare, but yeah. She was happy, and that was good.
Hyejoo walked over the counter and placed their order. She found herself staring at Chaewon while waiting for her change. She could not help, but admire the blonde's side profile. The girl working at the counter called her attention for the second time. Seeing that the customer seemed to be too distracted, the girl followed Hyejoo's stare.
"How long have you been together?"
"Wait, what?" Hyejoo's eyes widen. She was shocked with the girl's question.
"No, we're not together. We're just, uhm friends." Hyejoo hastily denied, but her voice lowered down at the last word as if she disliked it.
"Hm. Then I hope that changes soon. Goodluck!" The girl gave Hyejoo her change, and she gestured "Fighting!" as Hyejoo went back to their table.
"What flavor did you choose?"
"You've said you like vanilla." Hyejoo answered.
"I'm asking about yours, captain obvious." Chaewon playfully snickered.
"Strawberry. May I ask something?"
"Sure, I've heard from Jinsol-unnie that you always have a lot of queries. Ask all you want; I was looking forward to them." Chaewon put down her phone, giving Hyejoo her full attention. Someone was looking forward to Hyejoo's onslaught of random questions? That was a first.
"Who are you?"
"I've told you before, I'm Park Chaewon?" Chaewon blinked, disbelief etched all over her face. She thought they were having a good time, how come Hyejoo forgot her name?
"I wasn't asking for your name. I said 'Who are you?'. Of course, I know that you're Chaewon. Everyone at school knows you." Hyejoo shifted her gaze to the cars passing outside the ice cream parlor.
"Ow, at least you do know that we’re from the same school? I didn't expect you to bring that up. I thought you've already forgotten that you ran away from me during your freshman year." Chaewon chuckled as she recalled the first time she has met Hyejoo.
It has been months since Hyejoo entered Orbit High. She was not really looking forward to being a high school student. Although she was evidently good at school, she disliked studying. It was boring for her; she has always thought that she would rather peacefully sleep at home or play video games. Her sister Sooyoung would never let her do that, so here she was, waiting for her cousin Yerim. Yerim was the only thing great about Orbit High for Hyejoo. She was grateful that her beloved cousin Yerim was also a student there. At least, that stopped her from being a total loner. Despite being on different sections, they would always go to school together and eat lunch together at the cafeteria while talking about random stuff. They mostly talked about video games and Hyejoo’s random questions, where Yerim would always just say:
“I don’t know? :D”
It was not like Hyejoo was being outcasted by her classmates. In fact, it was the opposite. They wanted to befriend her, but she seemed to be faithful with her constant dislike for human interaction and respectfully rejected their offer every time. Although few people were still willing to try, namely Ryujin and Chaeryeong. They were enthusiastic and determined to persuade Hyejoo into joining their school’s dance crew. They have never seen Hyejoo dance, but they insisted that there was no way Sooyoung’s younger sister could not dance. They were right about that. Hyejoo actually used to go on the same dance academy with her older sister Sooyoung, but she has already dropped dancing due to some reasons.
Hyejoo was always with her cousin Yerim at school, except after classes. Yerim being the bright kid she has always been, joined various extra-curricular activities; therefore, Hyejoo had to go home on her own.
It was just another mundane afternoon. Hyejoo was about to leave the room when Ryujin and Chaeryeong stopped her. She did not know how it happened, but they were able to drag her into their school’s dance studio. They have told her to at least watch and give it a chance if she ever finds any interest on it. She recognized several people; Yerim was also there, she squealed as she saw Hyejoo and frantically waved at her.
The dance crew was practicing a dance cover for a song called “Cherry Bomb”. Although Hyejoo already lost interest with dancing, she thought the choreography was cool. She noticed another familiar face; recreating the flip, the center guy did at a certain part of the song. Park Chaewon.
Orbit High’s Princess Chaewon, that nickname stuck with Hyejoo when she heard her classmates talking about the girl before. The students were mostly kind; but if there was an unspoken pyramid of social hierarchy in Orbit High, Park Chaewon was on top. She was Park Jinsol’s younger sister, she was intelligent, stunning, kind and sociable. Everyone wanted to be her friend, and Hyejoo has also seen how many boys and girls were attracted to Park Chaewon. She was indeed Orbit High’s Princess. Hyejoo and Chaewon’s eyes met and before the latter could even react, Hyejoo left.
After they were dismissed from their last class which was Physical Education; Hyejoo picked up her bag and left the room. Instead of changing back to her uniform, she just decided to go before Ryujin and Chaeryeong stop her again. She thought that the aforementioned girls might have been waiting to stop her by the school gate, so she decided to hide at the rooftop for a while.
It was forbidden to go to their school’s rooftop; but Hyejoo has never been that keen on following rules, so she went anyway. As she peacefully stared at the sky, she could hear the loud music coming from their school’s dance studio, situated below.
“They must be practicing that dance cover again.” Hyejoo said to no one in particular. She was just listlessly thinking out loud.
“People dance either to impress, express or form social connections. I’m no longer interested with any of those.” Hyejoo bitterly smiled as she remembered how passionate she used to be about dancing. Unbeknownst to her, someone was listening to her ramblings.
Hyejoo felt like dancing; she would never admit it to Ryujin and Chaeryeong, but she enjoyed her visit to their school’s dance studio yesterday. She stood up, and danced the choreography as she remembered it from yesterday’s observation. Feeling upbeat for dancing after such a long time, she went ahead and performed the flip. She was also surprised that she was able to perfectly pull it off on her first try. She smiled contentedly, and was about to leave when she heard someone else’s hurried footsteps walking away from the rooftop’s door. She had no idea who was that, but someone definitely saw her.
The next morning, she was walking to school with Yerim when Park Chaewon called her name. Hyejoo just gave her a blank look, as Chaewon approached them.
“Hello, I’m Chaewon. That yesterday’s flip was dope!”
Shocked would be an understatement, Hyejoo was absolutely petrified. Her mind was silently panicking, Chaewon’s words activated Hyejoo’s fight-or-flight response. Leaving Yerim and Chaewon confused behind, she ran away.
From then on, Hyejoo made sure that she was always outside Chaewon’s five-meter radius.
“I panicked alright. Let me live. Stop laughing!” Hyejoo pouted, as Chaewon continued teasing her about it.
“Ya, you’ve been running away from me for a year already! Am I some sort of a ghost?” Chaewon rolled her eyes and tapped her fingers on the table, waiting for Hyejoo’s explanation.
“You’re a really great dancer though. You should audition for the dance crew!” Chaewon gave her a genuine compliment, noticing that Hyejoo was not planning to further explain her apparent act of evading Chaewon for the past year like some sort of plague.
“Why do you like vanilla ice cream?” Hyejoo randomly asked. Chaewon was not taken aback by the question, she has started getting used with Hyejoo’s randomness.
“I like it’s sweetness and smell.” Chaewon simply replied. She stared at Hyejoo’s eye, noticing the slight shift on their atmosphere. She waited for the other girl’s next words.
“Then why do people like dancing?” Hyejoo asked.
“People dance either to impress, express or form social connections. I like the expressing part.” Chaewon answered, referring to Hyejoo’s words a year ago. Hyejoo was not that bothered about the fact that Chaewon heard her words from before. Again, she shifted her gaze, avoiding the other girl’s eyes.
“Then if you take those things away, would you still dance?” Hyejoo smiled, as if proving that she was indifferent towards the words she uttered; but her eyes showed the opposite.
“What do you mean?” Chaewon was unsure how to answer the other girl, Hyejoo could have possibly meant a lot of things. She did not want to assume things either, she was hoping that Hyejoo would clarify her question.
“I love strawberries.” Intentionally avoiding Chaewon’s question, Hyejoo attempted to divert the topic. Right after her reply, the girl on the counter served their orders.
"Thank you Jungeun-unnie!" Hyejoo was dumbfounded to know that Chaewon was acquainted with the girl.
"Sure. Have fun!" Jungeun grinned at Chaewon, then winked at Hyejoo before she left.
“You know her?” Hyejoo wiped the spoon, using the tissue paper wrapped around it then gave it to Chaewon. The other girl briefly thanked her then started eating her vanilla ice cream.
“I love vanilla.” Chaewon mockingly said, copying Hyejoo's reply a while ago. Hyejoo squinted her eyes, Chaewon chuckled then decided to enlighten her.
“She’s Jinsol-unnie’s fRiEnD.” Chaewon playfully stressed the last word.
“Ow, her crush who said that Jinsol-unnie suits black hair?” Hyejoo asked, then started enjoying her strawberry ice cream.
“Yep. It isn’t just a crush, but don’t tell Jinsol-unnie that I’ve told you that. She clearly loves her.” Hearing the word “love” almost made Hyejoo scoff. She was clearly not fond of that word.
“Do you love Jiwoo-unnie?” Hyejoo asked her older sister Sooyoung, who has recently started dating Jiwoo.
“Yeah, I love her.” Sooyoung admitted, while holding back a bashful smile.
“Why?” Darkness clouding her eyes, Hyejoo asked.
“What do you mean?” Sooyoung perplexedly replied, but Hyejoo remained silent.
“One day, you would understand.” Sooyoung ruffled her younger sister’s hair and ended their conversation vaguely.
But I don’t want to ever understand.
“Why do people fall in love?” Hyejoo asked Chaewon. Just like anyone, Chaewon was unsure how to answer Hyejoo.
“What do you mean?” Chaewon replied, and Hyejoo found it quite funny how she has given the same reaction Sooyoung gave Hyejoo when she asked her before.
“I mean, love surely seems fascinating and fun at movies and books, but it’s not.” Hyejoo further explaining her thoughts made Chaewon ponder along those words.
“In reality, life is a lot cruel. Annually, thousands of couples end their marriage with divorce. Those who are already married tends to fall apart at some point, what more those who aren’t?” Hyejoo continued.
“What about those old couples then? There are also couples who sincerely love their partners until they are grey and wrinkly.” By this time, Chaewon has finished her vanilla ice cream and she was just as engrossed as Hyejoo with their conversation.
“Yeah, there are couples like that; but I doubt they have lasted that long without suffering. And even if they did, it might sound morbid, but everything’s bound to end eventually.” Hyejoo firmly stated her insights about the matter, Chaewon honestly wanted to think positively; but Hyejoo did have a point.
“And this is the worst part, just because people love each other, doesn’t mean it’s bound to last a lifetime. Even if it somehow lasted a lifetime, it would still eventually end. So, tell me, why do people foolishly fall in love? Would it be worth the hassle? Thank you for coming to my tedtalks.” Chaewon laughed at the way Hyejoo concluded her statement.
Hyejoo was aware that she must have shown off too much of her bizarre personality to Chaewon by talking about such morbid stuff. They were just high school students not a bunch of philosophers looking for the meaning of their existence. Honestly, Hyejoo would not be surprised if the other girl got turned off and decided to stay away from Hyejoo’s five-meter radius. Heck, she might even stay away from Hyejoo’s ten-meter radius; and it would still be very valid.
Despite Hyejoo’s negative expectation though, reality is slightly better. Instead of being turned off, Chaewon was impressed with how mature Hyejoo’s way of thinking was. Yes, it was a bit bizarre and pessimistic, yet logical and realistic. She could not help but wonder if Hyejoo was speaking out of personal experience.
“You’re not obligated to answer to this. I’m sorry if I’m being too nosy, but is this related as to why you and Sooyoung are using different surnames?” Chaewon carefully asked. Hyejoo was astounded that Chaewon has noticed that through their short conversation at the café when they were with their unnies.
“It’s getting late. A story for another day, perhaps?” Hyejoo calmly responded. Chaewon took it as a hint that the other girl was not comfortable talking about it for now. She understood and she was willing to wait until Hyejoo is comfortable enough to tell her.
They left the ice cream parlor after bidding Jungeun goodbye. Hyejoo and Chaewon exchanged their contact numbers with the intent of hanging out again. Chaewon did not let the other girl go without having her made a promise that she would stop running away every time she sees Chaewon at school. They have also taken each other’s in game name in PUBG and League of Legends. Hyejoo was joyful upon finding a new friend who understood her hobby and loved League of Legends as much as she did.
Things were still the same as always. Hyejoo was still Hyejoo, asking random questions. But now, Sooyoung and Jiwoo were relieved that Hyejoo was willing to ask those random questions to at least another person, namely Chaewon. They took it as sign that Hyejoo was gradually starting to put down her walls. They were grateful that Hyejoo now have Chaewon, Jinsol’s sister who would not hesitate to forcefully tear down Hyejoo’s walls if Hyejoo was not willing to do it herself.
Chaewon is a year older than Hyejoo, thus putting them on different year levels. They did not have the same schedule, but continued further knowing each other nonetheless. Sometimes Chaewon would join Yerim and Hyejoo at lunch. At other times, Hyejoo would visit the dance studio, watch their practice then hang out with Chaewon afterwards. Ryujin and Chaeryeong were delighted that Hyejoo was not as closed-off and as unsociable as before. They still have not given up their agenda of recruiting Hyejoo to the dance crew, especially now that Yerim and Chaewon were on board with recruiting her. Maybe not now, but eventually. Someday.
Hyejoo and Chaewon regularly hanged out during their free time and constantly communicated through phone. Although most of the times Hyejoo’s greetings were like,
“If you have a choice, then why?”
“If there was a typographical error in a dictionary, will we ever find out?”
“What’s the meaning of life?”
“If life is a bicycle and we have to keep balance, does that mean those circus clowns who perform balancing in a uni-cycle greatly excel at life?”
“Would Pennywise excel at life then?”
“Are we all clowns???”
Chaewon sometimes found herself laughing during ungodly hours of the night, because of Hyejoo’s questions. She was definitely enjoying them. At the back of her mind, she was still hoping that Hyejoo would be comfortable enough to open up with her. She knew that the other girl had so much unspoken words waiting to be heard.
Months passed. Countless arcade hangouts which Sooyoung and Jiwoo would fondly refer as “nerdy dates”. Countless ice creams bought from the ice cream parlor where Jungeun worked. Countless hours spent at internet cafés, playing League of Legends. Countless days spent sitting down at the park, staring at the sky while they talk about random things.
A lot of things happened. Life happened. They would sometimes quarrel over silly things which were easily resolved through sincere apologies and tubs of vanilla and strawberry ice cream. There were also times where Chaewon cried about her personal problems, her pain-stricken cries broke Hyejoo’s heart just as much. She was not good at comforting; she did not know what to do. Nonetheless, she stayed, listened and watched a marathon of the animated series Kirby; which Chaewon seemed to love. If that was everything she could offer to make the other girl feel slightly better, then she would not mind doing it a hundred times. Thousands even.
Chaewon knew she could count on Hyejoo, and Hyejoo knew that the same goes for her. Chaewon would always be there for her. She was there when Hyejoo has finally found the courage to pick up dancing again. She was there when Hyejoo admitted that she dropped dancing, because she found it insignificant to impress, express and form social connections. She acknowledged that her negative views towards the idea of love, stemmed from her parents’ separation years ago. When Hyejoo and Sooyoung’s father cheated, leading to the destruction of their family; then their parents ended up getting a divorce. Sooyoung had to go with their father, thus continuing her life as “Ha Sooyoung”. Meanwhile, Hyejoo stayed with her mother, changing her name to “Son Hyejoo”. Chaewon learned that Sooyoung and Hyejoo just started living together again when Sooyoung entered university, got her own apartment and convinced their mother to let Hyejoo live with her.
Although not literally, Hyejoo lost her parents whom she has always wanted to impress. The passion of wanting to express her innermost emotions was extinguished when she lived alone in an empty house, barely seeing her mother who immersed herself with work to forget her own pain. Social connections became unnecessary for her, thinking that there was no point in sharing. She was not brave enough to let someone in, not when even her own parents failed in preserving the sacred connection they had.
Things remained the same for Chaewon and Hyejoo, but this time, they were with each other.
During Chaewon’s high school graduation, she cried because she was leaving for university. She would miss Hyejoo a lot, the same goes for the other girl. They had an unspoken promise of keeping in touch with each other. Hyejoo assured Chaewon that it would only take a year, then Hyejoo would follow her.
After everything that they have went through together, they were aware that they have something special between the two of them. Or in Hyejoo’s own words,
“Something way more complex than a simple friendship, and something way deeper and more special than the overrated term ‘love’.”
“Then what do you call it?” Chaewon chimed.
“I call it, you. You’re the complication and hassle that I’d gratefully commit to be a part of.” Hyejoo grinned as she interlaced their fingers, and softly kissed Chaewon’s hand.
“Hyejoo, why do people foolishly fall in love?” Chaewon’s eyes b with love and adoration for the other girl asked her; purposely using Hyejoo’s exact words.
“Well, why not?”
Hyejoo smiled, knowing that she was capable of listing hundred reasons why she should not fall in love; but Chaewon’s existence is more than enough to negate those logical reasons.
Hyejoo was no longer having her existential crisis. She also has a decent amount of human interaction now. She was still asking everyone weird questions, but she has acknowledged that perhaps some questions are meant to be left unanswered for now. She has a whole lifetime ahead of her to figure out the answers, and she was definitely looking forward to a lifetime of satisfying her queries. Especially knowing that it would be a lifetime spent with Chaewon.
Hyejoo remembered her older sister, Sooyoung’s words.
“One day, you would understand.”
Her Sooyoung-unnie was right. Even if Hyejoo was reluctant to find out at first, she has eventually understood. If Sooyoung would ever ask Hyejoo why she loved Chaewon, she could give infinite reasons, but her favorite one would always be,
“Why?”
“Just because.”
-fin.
:)
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