Among the crowd of people walking back and forth on the street, my eyes got locked on the two people who linked their arms while talking and laughing together. If you asked me doesn’t that hurt you? As silly as the question had asked, yes it’s hurt like thousands of needles were stabbed on the left side of my chest. I brought my right hand slowly before clutching my left chest as my eyes still following the two figures. My lip slowly curved up to form a pity smile for myself. I kept hurting my feeling too far to feel numb. But still, I thought I deserved it. For a coward like me, I never stood a chance.

I dragged my feet and started to walk away from the scene that made my eyes got burnt as my vision started to get blurry. My head got hung down, my sigh kept getting louder. Was there anything to stop this hurtful feeling?

With the slow pace of my walking, I opened the door of our room. I glanced around the dull atmosphere in the room before making my way to my room and laid down my exhausted body on the bed. How many months had passed since her friend dated that person? I thought.

It was almost 8 months. I had endured the pain during that time while they were happy seeing each other. Thinking about that, my tears started to escape from my eyes. I was too numbed to wipe the tear away.

Until a soft click from the main door got opened, I raised from my bed. Wiping my face to dry the tear, I thought it’s time to put the show.

“Saku-chan”

I heard my name got called from my best friend. I took a look of myself from the mirror; the melancholy smile was formed on it before replacing by a usual smile. This was a mask I wore in front of her.

“Jjaeyeon, You’re home?" I asked casually when making my way out of the room. Her cheerful face greeted me when I made eye contact with her. Her lip began to curve up when she saw me.

Too beautiful, it’s hurt

“How was your date?” I asked. Even before she answered me I already knew it was so stupid to question it. My brain cursed at me the same as my heart screamed out the pain.

“Just like usual, it’s fun” She answered as her back faced me. I hummed back.

“Are you hungry?” She asked me out of the blue when she opened the refrigerator. I observed her side profile while my brain tried to capture the picture in front of me.

“Saku-chan?” Chaeyeon’s voiced made me snapped back from my daydreaming. She looked at me with worrying displayed on her face.

Please don’t look at me like you care Chae-ah.

“Uh.. no, I just ate it a while ago” I lied. A slight frown formed on her angelic face before it’s disappeared as she nodded her head.

I can’t stay here anymore. I need fresh air. The melancholy feeling almost made me choked on my breath. The more I stood near her, the more my legs became wobbly. It’s extremely indignant.

“Chaeyeon, I’m going out for a few hours. Kwangbae just told me to meet up with her”. I made up another lie to her as I walked back to my room but her responded made me stopped my track.

“Are you two dating?”

I shifted my neck immediately without worrying that I might break it. What?

“What? Where did you hear that?” I asked in disbelieved. How on earth she spoke with such a ridiculous statement.

“Saku-chan, everyone basically could see that” She spoke in teasing voice, but I didn’t find it amusing.

So you could see how others show affection on me but not mine?

“We don’t. I just like to go to the pc room with her” I replied in defense speech. She could only hum while showing a stupid toothy grin of her whenever she felt satisfied with her teasing.

“Uh whatever” I stomped my foot as I slammed my door hard as I closed it. She might get shocked because of my action but I couldn’t bother about it anymore. It was offended enough that she was so dense yet she had the nerve to be a leg-puller. But whom to blame, I was the one who fell on her in the first place.

Chaeyeon may sense my sensitive as she kept knocking on my door but I wasn’t open it. After finishing changing my clothes, I yanked the door hardly. Due to my abrupt action, Chaeyeon instantaneously sto