Hoseok’s whole body was tucked inside of a warm downy dark green blanket, it was his favorite one, a perfect match for his all alone end of the year night. He missed the others, being all alone at a dorm can be not just boring, but sad, empty. All of them went to their houses, but not Hoseok. He couldn’t go this time so he tried to just pretend everything was fine. It was at least warm. Who am I trying to fool? Warm but he didn’t feel safe.

Sliding the blanket off his own body, he got up, eyes half shut carrying a sleepy Hoseok around. He could swear gravity was pulling him back to the couch where the warmth was left. Tea. It was a cold night, he had a dark red beanie contrasting his black and soft locks. Hoseok liked to wear beanies even when he was inside.

Walking towards the kitchen was almost terrifying, Hoseok hated being alone, and the socks he was wearing - causing no noise to be heard - made him think - even more - that he was really alone. In fact, some stuffs were helping him to deal with the all alone moment: the family calls, his favorite blanket and a small plushie he carried with him. A small white bear. Marsh. Short for marshmallow.

The mug fitted perfectly on Hoseok’s hand, it was mint tea, his favorite. The fresh flavor made him smile a little when he took a sip of it, a sigh escaping his slightly cold lips as he just walked back to the couch, staring at it with a pitiful face - if he could say how he looked. Honestly, he didn’t want to know. Well, it’s just you and me. While mumbling, he just set his body - again - on that tiny spot, cuddling the blanket and the plushie close to him, mug now in both hands.

Hoseok didn’t want to watch TV or anything, he just wanted to be able to fall asleep and forget this ty reality he was living. Much dramatic, yes. Sensitive, he would say. Minutes passed and his decision was to listen to some music, giving it a try to just calm himself enough to drift away to dreamland. That’s the place where he wanted to be now. Or. Probably with him, and that place would be somewhere in his dreams too.

The grip tightened around the dark mug, Hoseok’s fingers were trembling, only noticing his own state when he snuffled too loud. I hate this. The thought on his head just confirmed the whole situation, crying was something he was actually used to. Not a good statement. He looked down into the mug, following the tiny drops colliding softly with his tea, the tip of his sharp and delicate nose going right into it, inhaling the calm scent. While the music was playing, Hoseok felt his mind getting dizzy. Like if he was actually day dreaming, piano soft notes dancing through his head, a soft song. It paused itself. Hoseok's eyes slowly opened enough to see someone was calling, index finger touching right into the green spot on the touch screen.

Hoseok? — the husky voice on the other side of the line made Hoseok almost drop the mug. He placed it on top of the center desk before that could actually happen. — Oh! Yoongi Hyung! — he fought back the tears, it was unexpected, he surely didn’t expect Yoongi to call, even tho Yoongi cared about everyone, on his own way, Yoongi hated phone calls and he was busy. As much as Hoseok know. Busy with the New Year’s night just like the other members. — Hoseok, you’re okay? How are you feeling? — the question was made in a calm tone.

Yoongi was mostly always quiet and calm when he talked, his voice was deep and clear even tho Namjoon and Jimin joked around saying he sounded drunk or sleepy sometimes. But for Hoseok. Hoseok couldn’t put on words, it was, Yoongi’s voice. He liked it. It made him feel safe. — Everything’s fine, Hyung! Just a bit boring? I guess. — Yoongi hummed and Hoseok tried to stead his breathing. — Is that so? — Yoongi insisted and with a smile as if the older could see, Hoseok nodded. — Yeah! I’m watching something, honestly I’m almost sleeping. Don’t worry too much, Hyung! Trust me! — he gathered all of his strength to answer in a steady tone, sighing after a short silence of Yoongi’s. — I’ll trust you then. — again, Hoseok hummed and pressed the red spot as fast as he could, just placing the phone on the desk, together with the mug.

Pulling the blanket to cover half of his face, he decided to enjoy the silence even tho he was terrible at that. Something was helping him. Yoongi’s voice. A last glance at the clock and he closed his eyes shut, the sound of his own breathing echoing.

Hoseok? — it sounded like a whisper, far, he could hear it but not exactly like if he was fully awake. He thought it was a dream, so he smiled a bit. Finally. Dreamland. Hoseok’s arms wrapped the plushie, harder, while the name kept repeating till he felt something touching his arms. — Hoseok is not even midnight yet, what are you doing? You can’t sleep like this, I know, I hate all of this but you love, why are you- Hoseok-? — Yoongi was awful at talking when he was worried, he was good at showing things, on a cocky way but he tried. Seeing Hoseok like that wasn’t the right time to play the tsundere he used to play. It wasn’t all acting but he could understand - not admit - it was Hoseok.

Hoseok murmured while opening his eyes, so Yoongi just walked slowly with a plastic bag on his right hand. A knowing smell now spreading through the room where both of them were. — Hyung? — he felt gravity again working, hair a mess and one side of his cheeks were slightly red, puffy. — You’re not dreaming so get up. — Yoongi was closer now, a grin on his face, a sweet one. — What are you- — Hoseok started only to have the older interrupting him.

Hoseok. I trust you. But I know when you’re lying only to make me not worry. Which never works, so. Get up. — Yoongi’s cold hand was now touching the warm blanket, unfolding it and sliding it off the taller. It was echoing inside his head, how 

Yoongi was charming and attractive on his unique way, it was cute, and sometimes Hoseok wished he could say it out loud without messing things up.

Hoseok had both of his hands covering his eyes, pressing the tips of his warm fingertips on the place to help him waking up totally. — Fried Chicken! — Yoongi tried. He was always like that, he tried. It was hard, but still, he tried. So when Hoseok saw the sweet gummy smile and the plate with fried chicken he swore his heart skipped a beat or two. He felt warm. So warm that he believed it was burning, suffocating with a lump on his throat.

 Spicy. Isn’t it your favorite? — The smaller asked as he watched  Hoseok’s expression; eyes glued on the other's as if he was analyzing them, maybe searching for an opening door to his thoughts. Obviously. Yoongi failed. — Mhm. It is, Hyung. And you remembered that. — with a tiny smile, he reached his own hand - he didn’t care about the oily feeling on the tip of this fingers - he just found the way to the other’s hand, intertwining their fingers in an intimate way that got the pale to widen his eyes, almost chocking on a piece of chicken. That. That moment got Hoseok laughing; slightly pink cheeks appearing within the seconds.

What are you doing? — Yoongi’s fingers felt cold, they were trembling a bit and if it was out of nervousness or the cold winter night. Well. The answer on his mind and out loud would for sure change. — Holding hands. — Hoseok replied, simple tone and still holding the hand tight. — Want me to let go? — He didn’t want to hear the answer. Now it was different. Definitely. Hoseok was clingy and usually - more than usually - he loved cuddling moments and they were normal to him. But not this time. It was more. More than that. And it was all inside of him, silent but still screaming. — No. — Yoongi looked away as he replied, he had a tiny smile, just a bit of his side lips curving. It was sweet. Hoseok wanted to kiss that spot. Not later. But now. And that’s what he did.

Hoseok- — their eyes met again, now not only their eyes, but the air coming out of their mouths were dancing. Yoongi searched for an answer since Hoseok didn’t say anything. That was weird. Hoseok silent. Funny, their fingers were still intertwined. — Hyung, is it okay? If I..— he couldn’t complete the sentence, his black hair was a mess and it was covering a bit of his eyes, and called Yoongi’s attention, but not more than the heart shaped lips. — Don’t let me think.

The touch was smooth, Hoseok never imagined that Yoongi’s lips would be like this, melting soft on his. The air was dense around them, Hoseok felt like his heart was about to burst out from his chest. Yoongi’s fingers were sliding right into the black soft locks as he smiled into the kiss. How could it be? How could Yoongi let that happen? He wasn’t stepping back. He didn’t want to. The only thought on his head, loud, so loud he actually spoke. — Don’t stop. — the husky voice sent shivers down the taller’s spine, Hoseok deepened the kiss. Kinda messy, kinda sloppy, but it was Yoongi. It was sweet. That included the soft moans and they were long and in low 

tone. Hoseok swallowed them as if it was the last thing he was going to do that night, as if he needed Yoongi’s air to survive. It sounded desperate, but maybe that’s exactly what both of them were. Desperate for each other, longing for touch, for words. Unspoken words.

The dark green blanket now was not necessary, splattered on the floor while both bodies were close. Hoseok’s arms holding the small feature close to him, the tip of his nose inhaling Yoongi’s hair fragrance, all tension on Hoseok’s body vanished away. He needed to open his eyes. That was all he needed to do. And he did. — Yoongi Hyung, I'm happy you’re here. — Yoongi looked up, his eyes were capture everything and for a moment he wished he has lenses instead of eyes, that he could take pictures of every detail he loved on Hoseok’s face. — I’m glad I passed by. — he whispered as he rested his forehead on the other’s. — I know I’m not good at being alone, and I know I should grow up, I know. It’s just that, tonight, it felt like I was truly alone. It was scaring and lonely, and cold but then you appeared and-   — Yoongi sighed, turning to face him again, he wanted to say it out loud, crystal clear. He was terrible at that. Both of them were. It was new. Everything was new. But for a brief moment, Yoongi managed to whisper, inaudible. 

Then I shall never leave, Hoseok.