All the girls in school, especially the pretty and popular ones, had tried in vain to attract the gorgeous hunk’s attention were appalled when the 2 boys started going around as a couple. Beauty and the Beast, they were labelled. No points for guessing correctly who is the Beauty and who is the Beast. Junho didn’t really mind. With his mop of unruly curls and the pair of big black rimmed glasses he was wearing, he knew he is nowhere near the category of attractiveness.

Which is why he could not understand what the gentle giant he calls his boyfriend saw in him.

“Because you are so breathtakingly beautiful.” Taecyeon will reply him in a gentle voice, his eyes sparkling with love.   

One day, at the age of 21, Junho woke up and found a stunning youth looking back at him in the mirror. He couldn’t believe his transformation into someone who actually look like he belongs next to the picture of gorgeousness that is Taecyeon.

“Told you, you are beautiful, have I not?” The tall man whispers sultrily against his lips before sealing his words with a deep kiss.

The boys graduated and stepped into the world of adulthood. Taecyeon joined a MNC as a junior floor manager where he hopes to learn the ropes of the business world while Junho worked hard on his career path to becoming a full-fledged librarian. In the midst of all the uncertainties in their future, they moved in together into a tiny one room apartment and live as a couple because that is the only concrete certainty they both knew and shared.

“One day in the near future we will live in the biggest house in Gangnam!” Taecyeon declares drunkenly, raising his half emptied beer can to the ceiling as if to propose a toast to the promise he just made. “Believe me?” He turns suddenly to the smaller man next to him, beseeching him for his trust.

Junho nodded with one of his signature warm sunshine smile. There is no reason not to, he had been at his side supporting Taecyeon through all 3 of his promotions that brought him to his current position as team manager for the Asia Pacific region. This recent elevation in position means Taecyeon will be travelling extensively for work. Truth to be, Junho is feeling the loneliness of being left alone for weeks on end. And when the taller man is finally home, he will be sleeping off the exhaustion of his constant flying or clearing his work correspondences.  

“Aren’t you going to confront him about it?” Wooyoung plodded him once out of frustration when his best friend realized that they had not been intimate for over 3 months.

“About what?” Junho is confused.

“He is always working! When was the last time the both of you sat down and have a proper conversation?” Wooyoung asks feeling unjust for his friend.

“Uhm….” Junho couldn’t recall really. “B-but he’s busy….hyung.” He argues weakly.

“No one is THAT busy!” Wooyoung contends hotly. “When was the last time he touched you?!”

Junho could feel his eyes moistening. Wooyoung’s words stirred up the pain he had kept suppressed with so much effort. He doesn’t want to sound like a needy boyfriend and be an obstacle in Taecyeon’s climb up the corporate ladder even though he misses his soulmate so much.

He recalls how his beau used to be a cuddle monster, never a day went by without them snuggling at least once. To outsiders, the giant’s excessive need for intimacy were sometimes too much but to Junho, it is proof of Taecyeon’s love and affection for him.

Suddenly unable to breathe, he tries to expel the stale air in his lungs as hard as he could and it came out as a deep sigh. Wooyoung frowned when he hears sadness behind the sigh. Turning, he saw color rushed off the younger’s face as Junho’s body teeters towards him. Reaching out, he caught his friend and props him up to prevent him falling over again. “Are you feeling okay?” he asks anxiously.

“I-I I’m okay.” Junho mutters tiredly. “Just dizzy.”

“Are you coming down with something?”

“N-no, I haven’t been sleeping well for the past week. Just lack of rest. Don’t worry.” He explains hurriedly then flash Wooyoung a pale smile to assure the worried man.

Junho opens the door to their apartment and enters, immediately catching sight of the pair of bespoke leather shoes lying haphazardly by the door. It’s no longer their first home, that tiny apartment. Taecyeon has bought this luxurious penthouse in Gangnam after been made a junior director of his unit 6 months ago. Toeing off his shoes in the vestibule, he straightens the abandoned leather shoes before stepping into the narrow corridor leading into the house.

The large high-ceiling and tastefully furnished living space is empty save for 2 large black Samsonite suitcases sitting next to one of the leather couches closest to the kitchen. Instinctively he heads for their bedroom. Opening the door, his heart burst into uncontrolled joy at the sight of his man standing before the full length mirror buttoning up the white shirt he has on. Hurrying to his side, he tiptoes forward to drape his arms over the tall man’s shoulders in an attempt to hug the person he misses so much his heart is starting to hurt.

“Welcome home, Taecyeonnie.” He greets excitedly and kisses the man on the neck under his ear. Taecyeon smells fresh out of the shower but did not show any signs of reciprocating the greeting. Junho frowns at his taciturnity but chose to push the feeling of dread away because it has reaches a point whereby he is desperate enough to just have the man home.

“Did you have a good trip?” He tries to banter to distract himself from thinking negative thoughts but all Taecyeon did was grunt in reply while he continues to dress. “Are you going out a-again?”

The taller man grunt again as he finishes dressing and grabs the sports jacket laid out on the bed. “I’m meeting clients for dinner tonight. Don’t wait up.” He finally said before leaving the room. Junho’s jaw drops open in mild shock.

What was that?

“Arggh –“ Junho cried out at the sudden pain in his chest. His right hand presses the area where it hurts the most, fingers crawling at his shirt hoping to ease the sharp ache somewhat. But the pain only amplifies till his sight blackens momentarily and he collapses blindly onto the floor. The intensity continues to grow, spreading down the whole of his left arm till he is forced to lie down flat onto the marble floor, gasping heavily from the agony.

Then as suddenly, the pain is gone. Junho sits up tentatively feeling the soreness where the ache was earlier. His left arm muscles feel too weak to clench so he pushes himself off the floor clumsily using only his right arm.

Taecyeon continues to be busy with work, travel and late night engagements while Junho endures in complete silence. He had stopped even confiding in his best friend to avoid listening to Wooyoung nagging him to take action to salvage his relationship. Taecyeon has managed to spend a few nights at home eating dinner with him and that somewhat made everything bearable again. But during the moments he misses his giant lover, his heart will start to ache, although not as badly as that time 3 months ago when he had collapsed in the bedroom.

When the pain strikes, Junho will squat down and lean against a wall for support. Internalizing the pain by hugging himself into a ball as he waits for the episode to be over. Sometimes it will be over in minutes, sometimes as long as half an hour. These sudden spurts of pain leave him exhausted but he would not tell anyone about it simply because verbalizing it would make him feel weak and needy.

What happened last night is still vivid in his mind. Taecyeon had come home drunk and irate at 2am in the morning. He ranted loudly while Junho was helping him into the bedroom but then soon the verbal abuse began. Junho’s tears threaten to fall as he recalls how his boyfriend had accused him of being the one and only obstacle in his final surmount to the role of CFO because his boss could not accept that he is gay and has a boyfriend instead of a picture perfect family with a wife and kids.

Junho had stood frozen as the man he loves threw homophobic slurs at him till the drunken man quiets down did he awake from his trance and moves closer to undress him so he can sleep more comfortably. He did not see the kick coming at him, Taecyeon’s foot caught him in the gut and he reeled back from the impact till he hit the opposite wall.

“Don’t touch me! G-get away from….from me….you USELESS piece of gay !” Taecyeon bellowed loudly before falling back onto the bed in a stupor. The small man picked himself off the floor wincing at the pain in his stomach and on his back, staggering out of the room because he feared more physical confrontations which he might not survive.

Chansung frowned when the shelf he is stocking shook a little as if something or someone banged into it really hard. Next he hears a loud thud as if a very thick book was dropped onto the floor from a high elevation point. Surprised, he ran to the next aisle and saw his colleague lying unconscious on the floor.

“Junho!” He did not bother to keep his voice low as he ran towards the inert figure to check for signs of life. “Aish! Junho! Wake up! Junho!”

Taecyeon’s face is a frozen mask of nothing but his eyes stayed on the sleeping figure in bed. The face seems somewhat unfamiliar. Pale as the sheets pulled under his chin, eye bags darkish blue, lips cracked and cheeks sunken.

Who is this person?

He was in the middle of a very important meeting when his phone started ringing. His assistant took the call and ran back into the room to relay the urgent message in a whisper only meant for his ears. He remembered running out of the room without a second word, his assistant’s words still ringing in his ears.

“The hospital called. Junho is dying. It’s best you can go now if you want to say your final goodbyes.”

The door to the room crashed open and a slight figure dashed in. “Nuneo! Nuneo! Speak to me! Wake up!” Taecyeon watches stoically at the newcomer pleading tearfully.

“YOU SOB! YOU KILLED MY NUNEO!”

What is he saying?

“YOU F---KING SOB!” The lithe man charged at him, livid beyond reason. Two thin hands flew at him wrapping weak fingers around his thick neck trying to strangle him. The attempt is ludicrous but Taecyeon did not laugh. He still could not understand why Wooyoung is accusing him of killing Junho.

“H-hyung –“ A very faint voice interrupted their fight and Wooyoung’s arms drop weakly away from Taecyeon’s neck as both of them turned their attention to the figure on the bed. “Hyung..please….” Junho pled feebly.

“Nuneo!” Wooyoung sprints forward to hold the dying boy’s icy cold hand. When he saw that Junho’s eyes stay fixedly on the giant standing behind him but Taecyeon still isn’t responding, his anger surged again. Forcing himself to concentrate on his ailing friend, he wills himself to suppress his anger and tears.

There is so much sorrow in Junho’s eyes as he stares unwaveringly at the one and only man he ever loved in his entire life. His heart is crying out for him to hold him one last time but his mouth refuses to betray the last threads of his dignity. Not in the face of death.

“Is there anything you want to say to us?” Wooyoung sensed that his best friend is holding back and may not have another chance to speak again but Junho simply refuses to say another word, his eyes never leaving Taecyeon.

Unable to contain his frustrations any longer, he turned to glare at the “statue” behind him. “Aren’t you going to comfort your boyfriend?!” He hisses angrily but the “statue” still remain rooted to the floor he is standing on. With a soft sigh, Junho closes his eyes and turned away.