Conformation is something you have been taught since you were a mere child, therefore as an adult you are expected not to diverge from societal norms. The foundation for a perfect life has always been set by the Elders of the town and they expect nothing less from its citizens. Straying the path means disappointing those around you; not only that but you risk being judged and possibly be under some sort of punishment by the Elders. There are many types of punishment that you can’t even begin to imagine—and you know you would rather not experience them—but despite their severity, they always involve a trip to the town’s hospital for what they call recalibration of the daily serum injected to everyone before they leave their dwelling.

Therefore, it is rare to find someone bend the rules. Why would one do so in the first place, when each one is to be assigned their own task in The Community and everyone has a job to perform? So, a few weeks after the Ceremony of Eighteen—where you and all the eighteen-year-olds finally received your career for the rest of your lives—you did not expect to come face-to-face with a worn-out Jimin, heaving as he got off his bike. A white cloth encircles around his torso tightly and he wraps his hands protectively around its content.

“Jimin, why in heavens—in the middle of the night—what are you carrying?” you scowl at him, trying hard to keep your voice as quiet as possible. Your mind alarms you of the strict curfew as the grass blades tickle your bare feet, so you pull Jimin underneath the roof of your backyard’s porch. It’s an attempt at precaution, in case one of the people in your family unit peaks out of their bedroom window. You finally catch a glimpse of what he’s holding, and you gasp, eyes widening.

“What happened? Why do you have an infant with you?” you search Jimin’s eyes and he sighs.

“I couldn’t just leave Jungkook when I know what happens to children who are not “fit” enough to get assigned to a family unit. You’ve got to help me escape,” he explains with urgency, eyes scanning the surrounding with caution. You notice the infant stir and you fear that it would wake up and cause a commotion. Jimin notices this as well because he starts swaying gently in hopes that it will keep him or her in a deep sleep.

“Escape where, Jimin? We’re surrounded by a wall!” Your mind reels at the word escape, you’ve never felt something so foreign roll out of your own tongue before. The consequences immediately pile up in your head and fear starts to overwhelm your nerves, sweat forming on your palms which feels strange and unnatural. Jimin is at lost for words, mouth agape before closing again like a fish out of water. The infant in his arms begin to cry so you immediately take him from Jimin’s sturdy arms.

“Here, give him to me,” you scoop him up carefully and gently place your index finger through his forehead. You hum a familiar tune you use to put your own siblings to sleep and soon enough, Jungkook was fast asleep in your arms once more. Your worry vanishes in an instant as you watch the infant in your arms relax.

“The Chief of Elder chose right when he assigned you as a Nurturer,” Jimin glances at you with adoration in his eyes and you lower your gaze, a faint blush forming on your cheeks. You hate the feeling of having yourself wrapped around Jimin’s finger as if you are under is will and command, willing to do his bidding for him. As you continue to hold the child in your arms, you are overcome with a sense of conflict—a strong feeling to follow the set rules rather than to follow what your heart is telling you.

“What about your apprenticeship to be the Receiver of Memories?” you wrap the fabric tighter around Jungkook as the winds pick up a little bit more. You yourself are shaking due to the cold but you think it’s more so due to the dread of possibly seeing what lies beyond the walls you’ve grown accustomed to.

“The Giver was the one who taught me to be able to think for myself and know what I believe in, so I don’t think he’ll be too disappointed about me leaving. I’ve got to know what’s out there. And I have to get Jungkook out of here otherwise…he’s going to get killed.”

You blink at Jimin’s words; no one dies in the community, at least that’s what you have always been told. The K-word was rarely thrown around, those older usually are released to elsewhere and are free to enjoy life outside the community. But Jimin apparently found that to not be the case. He learned that the Elders have been deceiving the whole town and of course no one dares to question them, especially because no one experiences pain, conflict and suffering anymore. The people are satisfied and live good lives; why would anyone dare ruin that?

“Jimin, do you hear what you’re saying?” you admonish, feeling uneasy about the conversation. You did listen to what he told you the previous night and did not take the daily serum you were assigned to every morning; it has left you in a state of haziness the whole day. You noted that it had been harder to focus, and you felt distracted by every little thing that occurs around you: Like Jimin.

His hair flops over his eyes, occasionally ruffled by the constant flow of the wind. You swear by the moon that you see a flicker of change in Jimin’s hair and you could not find it within yourself to describe what the occurrence is or was. It came as the breeze picked up, and was gone as soon as the winds left, too. You search Jimin’s eyes for answers; wanting to know what that change particularly was and exactly why he had instructed you not to take the serum.

Jimin is quick to notice the slight tint of rose on your cheeks; he’s been able to discern more colour (was the word the Giver used to describe the phenomenon) from each other every day that he doesn’t take the serum. He so badly wanted to tell you the memories of the past—of the fun memories of olden times the Giver had passed on to him such as singing, dancing and performing in front of such large crowds that would make even those with the toughest heart cry in awe. He wants to tell you about sadness, too, the pain of losing someone you care about so deeply you’d be willing to follow them in the afterlife. But Jimin could not wrap his mind on where to begin. He wishes for you to know the beauty of being able to see colours instead of just the monochromatic surrounding that everyone else—including you—sees.

“Come with me, please,” Jimin begs more urgently this time around, clutching both your arms. You are conflicted; never once in your eighteen years of life did you imagine yourself breaking the law, even for Jimin. In your plight you did not notice the lights in one of the rooms of your house turn on—your mother had awoken from the infant’s cry and she’d seen both you and Jimin. She had quickly called Department of Justice who told her that correctional officers would be arriving soon.

Not long after, you and Jimin notice the warning sirens wailing from afar, signalling that you both don’t have time to wait for each other’s decision. Jimin is set on what he wants to do and the rest is up to you. You suddenly feel the weight of a thousand burning suns the more you continue to hold Jungkook in your arms, so you pass him to Jimin. His pleading eyes become too much to bear so you look to the ground, suddenly aware that he is leaving for good, and that you might not see him ever, even if he does make it past the walls. The thought of it breaks your heart, a lump lodging in between your throat uncomfortably.

“Weren’t you always curious of what lies outside these pristine walls? What the world is like beyond those gates?” he questions hurriedly as he searches your eyes for answers he knows he will not hear come out from your lips. You hesitate but nod wordlessly. “Then come with me.”

“Jimin, you know I can’t. The uncertainty of it all—what about my younger siblings? I can’t just abandon them,” tears well up in your eyes at the thought. The twins had barely turned nine and you could not bear the thought of seeing them cry because you had abandoned them. And for what, but your own selfish desires? “I’m sorry, truly. You must go if you want to escape; I promise not to tell them anything.”

Your emotions are going haywire and it certainly shows as your heart constricts in an indescribable manner, tears falling from the corner of your eyes. You watch Jimin turn and place the still-sleeping Jungkook on the spacious cradle in front of the bike. He too was experiencing all sorts of emotions, but one he can place a finger on since he learned it from the Giver—the pain of departing, of good-byes.

He closes his eyes as he remembers the memory that the Giver shared him during their lesson hours prior. His heart hammers wildly against his chest at the mere thought of doing that particular action, but he’s made his mind up and so he can’t simply back down. He opens his eyes and turns to you with a serious look on his face. He reaches out and brings his right hand against your cheek and you welcome the warmth his fingers emanate.

Jimin leans closer until your lips touch and you choose not to flinch away; instead you hold your breath in anticipation. His lips are a bit cooler than his hands had been, but you did not mind because they feel like cotton against your own lips. He pulls away and warmth has risen up your cheeks; you are unsure of the feeling but what Jimin has done left you with hollowness in your own chest, making you want to claw your heart out in desperation. You are too shy to make eye contact, so you choose to focus your gaze on the ground instead.

“I’ll be back for you once I know Jungkook is safe. I promise.”

He’s gone in an instant, and you are left with nothing to cling onto but his vow of return.