Xuanyi stumbles into Fu Jing’s room at three in the morning, her cheeks flushed, eyes bloodshot, hair damp with sweat and clinging to her face. “J-Jing,” she stammers. “I need your help.” She lurches and almost falls, and Fu Jing hurriedly catches her, steadies her, and Xuanyi clings to her like a drowning person clutching at a lifesaver. Xuanyi smells—amazing, like strawberries and vanilla and things Fu Jing can’t put a name to.

“What’s wrong?” Fu Jing asks in alarm. “What happened?”

Xuanyi looks at Fu Jing with wet, pleading eyes. “I need your help,” she repeats. “I need you.”

Fu Jing’s heart thumps so loudly she worries Xuanyi will hear it. “What do you need me to do?”

“I need you to—” Xuanyi’s tongue flits over her lips. “I need you to me.”

Fu Jing’s brain short-circuits. She thinks she must have heard wrong. She must have. There’s no way Xuanyi said that. It’s late, Fu Jing hasn’t slept, she’s either hallucinating or dreaming. That’s all. She pinches herself as hard as she can, but except for her skin reddening nothing has changed. Xuanyi is still looking at her with those wet, pleading eyes, her lashes dark and damp and—have they always been so long? And have her lips always been so pink and inviting?

“I’m sorry to ask you this.” Xuanyi looks like she might cry. “I know it’s unfair to you. The thing is…” She takes a deep breath. “I’m a succubus.”

“A what?” Fu Jing asks faintly.

“A succubus,” Xuanyi repeats. “I need energy from to sustain my life. I’ve been holding it off for too long, I need it.” She shudders, and Fu Jing is hit with an intoxicating wave of her scent. “I’ll die if I don’t get some energy.”

Fu Jing swallows. “And you want me to…to give you that?”

“I’m sorry,” Xuanyi says in a small voice. “I-I can ask someone else, like Meiqi or—”

Blood pounds behind Fu Jing’s eyes, colouring her vision red. “No!” she blurts out, and it’s almost a snarl. Xuanyi looks at her with wide eyes. “I mean. I can help you. You don’t need to-to ask anyone else.”

Fu Jing hopes she isn’t deluding herself when she thinks that Xuanyi looks relieved. Then again, Xuanyi had sought her out, her and not Meiqi or one of the other girls.

“You smell amazing,” Fu Jing murmurs, wanting to bury her face in Xuanyi’s neck and just take her scent in.

“It’s the pheromones, they’re trying to lure you in.”

“They’re succeeding,” Fu Jing says, and before she knows it, she has her arms around Xuanyi and has pulled Xuanyi flush against her. finds Xuanyi’s neck, and she has an urge to bite down, to leave a mark.

“No marks,” Xuanyi says. “We have a performance coming up.”

Something about those words momentarily clears the haze washing over Fu Jing’s mind. She raises her head. “The performance…the group…”

“I know.” Xuanyi lowers her eyes. “You’ll probably hate me for this tomorrow but.” She takes a ragged, unsteady breath, sounding like she’s choking. She doesn’t finish her sentence.

Fu Jing takes her hand. “Xuanyi,” she says seriously. “I could never hate you.”

Xuanyi stares at her, and Fu Jing doesn’t think it’s the lighting that’s giving her eyes a reddish tint. “Jing,” she murmurs, leaning in, and once her lips land on Fu Jing’s, something clicks off (or maybe on) in Fu Jing’s mind and that’s it, she’s gone.

The scent of strawberries and vanilla overwhelms her. She’s pulled under, and she doesn’t resurface.

When Fu Jing wakes up, she feels like her whole body is aching but in a blissful way. She yawns and rubs a hand across her eyes, rolling over and suddenly being hit with pangs all over her body, and that’s when the events of the night return to her.

Xuanyi, coming into her room at three in the morning. Xuanyi, saying “I need you” and looking at her in a way that nobody could possibly resist. Xuanyi, smelling unbearably sweet and tasting even sweeter. Xuanyi, gasping whimpering her name like it’s the only word she knows. Xuanyi, who’s gone.

Fu Jing looks at her empty bed and gives an equally empty smile. You’ll probably hate me for this tomorrow. She doesn’t hate Xuanyi for putting her in this situation; she just wishes Xuanyi didn’t leave her in it alone.

“What happened to you?” Meiqi asks, wrinkling her nose as Fu Jing drags herself into the kitchen. “You look terrible.”

“Coffee,” Fu Jing grunts.

“First Xuanyi, and then you. Did you two stay up all night talking or something?”

Fu Jing stiffens. Talking? Hah. She supposes they did exchange some words, like “please” and “faster” and each other’s names.

“Fu Jing?” Meiqi is giving her a look of concern now. “Are you okay?”

“Where’s Xuanyi?” she asks in lieu of an answer.

“I don’t know, she ate enough to feed all of us and then I think she went to hole up in her room. It’s not like her but she wouldn’t tell me what’s going on. She does look very…refreshed though.” Meiqi doesn’t look too worried. Knowing Xuanyi, she can put up a cheerful front that can fool the world. “Did you two have a fight or something?”

“Or something,” Fu Jing says, barely moving her lips. She doesn’t exactly want to discuss this with anyone, much less Meiqi, who Xuanyi had almost gone to instead. Meiqi, who has known Xuanyi for far longer, who has seen a different side to her, who buys her a ring every year.

“Why are you looking at Meiqi like you want to kill her?” comes another voice as Yamy takes a seat beside them. “What did she do?”

“Laoya,” Meiqi whines. It isn’t until they started sharing a dorm that Fu Jing learned how much aegyo Meiqi has. “Xuanyi and Fu Jing have both been weird today. Do you want to do something as the leader?”

Yamy gives her an assessing look. “Fu Jing, what’s up with you?” Talk about being blunt.

“Xuanyi and I…had a fight, okay? I don’t want to talk about it.” Fu Jing knows she sounds like a petulant child right now, but that’s far better than telling the truth.

Yamy and Meiqi exchange a look that’s part exasperated, part knowing.

“It’s okay,” Meiqi says soothingly, patting Fu Jing’s elbow. “I’m sure Xuanyi will forgive you soon enough. She can’t stay mad at you.”

“Hey, why do you assume it was me who did something wrong?” Fu Jing says indignantly.

“Was it Xuanyi who did something wrong?” Meiqi asks with a raised eyebrow.

Fu Jing locks her jaw. She has no answer for that question.

When three knocks sound at her door, she has a feeling she knows who it is and she ponders not answering for a split second, but her body has already carried her to the door. She’s never been able to say no to Xuanyi.

Xuanyi gives a tentative smile. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Fu Jing returns.

“Can I come in?” Xuanyi asks, politely, hesitantly, like they’re merely acquaintances, like she hadn’t left scratches all over Fu Jing’s back and sides like she wanted to stake her claim. (Fu Jing hadn’t minded.)

Fu Jing wordlessly holds open the door.

Xuanyi keeps her eyes lowered and her hands wrung together. “Thank you, for earlier.”

Fu Jing blinks, taken off guard. “You’re welcome?”

“I don’t know what I would have done if you weren’t there.”

“You said it yourself, right? You could have gone to Meiqi or one of the other girls.”

“I don’t know if I could have.” Xuanyi keeps her eyes down. “The first person I thought of was you.”

“Xuanyi…” Fu Jing doesn’t know what to say to that, or maybe she does but she’s too afraid to say it. “What did you do before?”

Xuanyi gives her a confused look. “Before?”

“You said – you said you need it to live, right?”

“Oh, there’s never been a before. I just…how do you say it? Reached my age of maturity. So this was my first time.”

“Your first time for this purpose or your first time in general?”

Xuanyi’s blush tells her all she needs to know.

Fu Jing is debating how to address the whole first time thing, or if she needs to, when Xuanyi sidles up to her and looks at her through her lashes. “You’re going to be responsible for me, right?”

“W-what?” she stutters.

Xuanyi actually pushes her index fingers together and bites her bottom lip. “I mean, I gave myself to you so you’re going to take responsibility, right?”

“I-I—” Fu Jing opens , and then closes it, feeling like she could probably beat Xuanyi’s goldfish impression right now. And then Xuanyi bursts into laughter, so forceful that she actually crouches down and puts her hands on her knees, bracing herself.

“Y-you—” Fu Jing is speechless for a different reason now. “I can’t believe you.”

“Ugh, I grossed myself out,” Xuanyi says, shuddering. “I don’t know how actresses in those dramas do it. I hope I won’t have to play one of those characters.”

“Are you playing a character now?” Fu Jing asks quietly.

Xuanyi’s expression turns serious. “What do you mean?”

“Are you… If you didn’t…” Fu Jing stumbles over her words, her tongue, her heart. Finally, she bursts out with, “Why did you ask me? Of all the people who you could have asked, why me?”

“Why you?” Xuanyi repeats in a low voice. “You know why you.”

“I mean, I know I’m hot and all that,” Fu Jing says with a weak laugh, “but I doubt that’s it.”

“You’re beautiful,” Xuanyi agrees, and Fu Jing’s heart does a gymnastics routine. “But that’s not why.”

“Xuanyi,” Fu Jing says, and it sounds like a plea.

Xuanyi takes a step closer to her, and then another. “Jingjing,” she says, and just that word – and the affection behind it – is enough to make Fu Jing flush from the tips of her ears to the base of her neck. It’s a totally different kind of flush from what she had last night, and the warmth she feels is of a different variety as well. “I’m not in heat now. And you’re not under the effect of my pheromones. If I asked you now…” She breaks off for a second, her cheeks looking a little pink, and then continues. “If I asked you now, would you agree?”

“Asked me what?” Fu Jing asks with bated breath, not because she’s that dense but because she wants to hear Xuanyi say it.

Xuanyi smiles. “I need you,” she says, the same words she said last night but in a different tone and, if Fu Jing’s not mistaken, a different context. “Not because I’m in heat, not because my life depends on it, but because…because you always peel crawfish for me when we go out to eat, and remind me not to eat latiao on an empty stomach, and glance at me when you’re singing your line in a ballad.”

Somehow, Fu Jing has the frame of mind to say, “I just want to make sure that I’m not off key.”

Xuanyi laughs. “Okay, Ms. Main Vocal. Why don’t you look at Aojuan or Meiyun or Ziting instead then?”

“Well, I guess it’s the same reason you didn’t go to Meiqi or someone else.” And suddenly, Fu Jing knows.

“And what reason is that?” Xuanyi asks, and even though isn’t smiling her eyes are.

“Because I love you.”

Fu Jing opens hurriedly. “And I’m not saying this because we slept together and I want to lure you into bed again or something – but you can lure me if you want. I just want you to know my intentions are genuine, okay, I’m not a zhanan. I am going to be responsible for you.”

Xuanyi looks at her. “Jingjing?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re sweet, but you talk too much sometimes.” Before Fu Jing can refute this, Xuanyi adds almost casually, “Oh, and I love you too” and pulls her into a kiss.

It’s hard to find anything to say against that.

“How is this going to work now?” Fu Jing asks, trailing a hand absently up and down Xuanyi’s arm, her side, establishing contact.

“How’s what going to work? Us? Well, I thought we’d go on a lot like before, except now I can kiss you rather than just thinking about it.”

Fu Jing’s face turns red. “You mean you wanted to kiss me before?”

“Jingjing, I didn’t come into your room randomly.” Xuanyi takes her hand, not the one that’s on Xuanyi, but her other one. “I wanted you long before my heat ever came, and I still want you long after it’s over.”

“You said you could ask Meiqi or someone else,” Fu Jing says, unable to help the way hurt slips into her voice.

“Yeah and you looked like you wanted to kill her afterwards,” Xuanyi laughs, and Fu Jing blushes again as she remembers Yamy saying something similar. Had she really been that obvious?

“I don’t think I could have asked anyone else,” Xuanyi says, expression more serious now. “I don’t know what I would have done if you said no.”

“Xuanyi, haven’t you noticed? I’ve always been terrible at saying no to you.”

“I can’t say that I mind that,” Xuanyi says, with one of her smiles that has always made Fu Jing want to kiss her. Maybe Fu Jing didn’t realize that was what she wanted, maybe she tried to convince herself that she thought of Xuanyi, cared for Xuanyi as a friend and only that, maybe she didn’t know just how much she needed Xuanyi until Xuanyi literally fell into her arms.

Xuanyi tilts her head to the side. “Jingjing. What are you thinking about?”

“You,” Fu Jing says candidly. She doesn’t need to hide that now; she doesn’t need to hide anything in front of Xuanyi. “Do you think… Are you planning to tell the girls?”

“Do you think we should?”

“It’s your decision. What are the succubus laws on this kind of stuff?”

“I don’t think there are any laws on love. Nobody would be able to police that.”

Even though Xuanyi had just told her minutes ago that she loves her, Fu Jing finds her face filling with warmth again at how casually Xuanyi says it, like a simple fact, an established truth.

“Jingjing, you’re so cute,” Xuanyi laughs. “You blush at everything.”

“Not everything,” Fu Jing mutters. “Just—why do you call me that, even?”

Xuanyi blinks. “Do you not like it?”

“No, I just rarely get called that.”

“What would you prefer,” Xuanyi says wryly. “Fu Yingjun? Fu Mingsi?”

“I can be Fu Yingjun and Fu Mingsi,” Fu Jing says with a pout. “I’m multifaceted, you know.”

“Yes, yes,” Xuanyi says, patting her head soothingly. “You’re very handsome and assertive. Do you want to get some food?” She holds up a finger as if anticipating a reply. “And don’t say something like ‘I’d rather eat you.’ My stomach takes priority right now.”

“Meiqi said you ate enough food to feed an army.” Well, she said Rocket Girls, but close enough. “You’re hungry again?”

“I need to eat a lot to replenish my energy.” Xuanyi looks at Fu Jing from underneath her lashes. “This heat takes a lot out of me.”

Fu Jing sighs. “I don’t think there’s anything good in the fridge. Let’s go to the kitchen. I’ll make you something.”

Xuanyi cheers – as in, actually throws her arms in the air and whoops. She can be such a kid sometimes. “You’re the best, Jingjing,” she says, pressing a kiss to Fu Jing’s cheek that leaves her warm and flustered once again. “There’s still milk tea powder left, right?”

“Of course, I don’t think anybody would dare finish that and incur your wrath.”

“I don’t have a wrath,” Xuanyi says, pouting, and Fu Jing kisses the expression off her lips.

“Okay, sure you don’t,” she says, much the same way Xuanyi had said ‘yes, yes, you’re very handsome and assertive.’ “Come on, let’s go eat.”

“Wait,” Xuanyi says, as Fu Jing opens the door and gestures for her to go out first. (She is a gentleman, after all.)

“What is it? You’re not hungry anymore?”

“No, I just want to do this first.”

“Do wh—”

Xuanyi turns her around, presses her against the wall and kisses her soundly on the mouth. This time, there are no pheromones emitting from her, no heat stirring the air between them, but Fu Jing’s head still spins and her stomach swoops and her heart thrums, pounds, beats XuanyiXuanyiXuanyi.

“I feel like I didn’t say it seriously enough last time,” Xuanyi says, her eyes glimmering like there are stars caught in them.

Fu Jing swallows. “You don’t have to say it. I know.”

“I figured you do, but still. I want you to know. I love you. I’ve always loved you. Before any of this happened, before we even debuted, I fell in love with you. I think—somehow I’m still falling, but I know you’ll catch me.”

Fu Jing can feel a helpless smile take over her face, take over her entire body, which no longer feels like it belongs to her but rather to the girl in front of her. Then again, this isn’t a new thing; she’s belonged to Xuanyi for a while now. It’s not the physical act of claiming each other last night that finalized it, but that they finally both put to words the feelings that they’ve had for months.

“I love you too,” she says, and this time she doesn’t even blush as she reels Xuanyi in for another kiss.

“Does it matter to you?” Xuanyi asks suddenly, later. “That it was my first time?”

“I mean, I just hope that it was, you know, special. Special enough.” Fu Jing manages to keep her voice steady, but she can’t help the way her cheeks start to redden again.

“It would have been special whether it was my first or thousandth time,” Xuanyi says, eyes intently on her. “It was with you.”

Colour and warmth flood her face, her chest, her entire body, the effect Xuanyi has always had on her, like she had only ever lived in a cold, monochromatic world and Xuanyi had brought light and hue into it, forever changing the path of her orbit.

“What about you?” Xuanyi asks.

“Does that matter? Would you feel differently if I’ve been with other people?”

“No, why would I?”

“I’ve been with other people before,” Fu Jing says, “but I’ve never been with anyone like you, and I don’t mean because you’re, you know, not totally human.”

“I’m human enough,” Xuanyi tells her. “I feel everything humans feel. And even if I didn’t, I think I would after today.”

“I didn’t even know I was capable of feeling all these things until I met you.”

“Looks like we both learned a lot from each other,” Xuanyi says, taking Fu Jing’s hand.

“Should I call you laoshi?” Fu Jing says teasingly.

“I think I prefer Laoxuan. Laoxuan and Laofu. Let’s call each other that until we really are old.”

“Deal,” Fu Jing says, holding out her pinky like the line from their song, and Xuanyi seals their promise.

“So I see you two made up,” Yamy says as the earthquake-like sound from Xuanyi’s stomach drives them to the kitchen.

“Jingjing and I can’t stay mad at each other,” Xuanyi says, reaching for the snacks cupboard already.

“Of course, she has you wrapped around her little finger, right Jingjing?” Yamy asks, raising her eyebrows at Fu Jing.

“Thanks for the concern, Yingying,” Fu Jing croons back in a saccharine voice, “but we’re good now.”

Yamy makes a face. “Good point, that’s disgusting, let’s never call each other by those names again.”

“Jingjing,” Xuanyi says sweetly. “Weren’t you going to make me something to eat?”

“Oh! Right.” Fu Jing starts rifling in the cupboards. “Do we still have any noodles? I can make you that black bean sauce noodles dish you like.”

“Doesn’t that take a while? I’m really hungry.” Xuanyi gives her a sad face. “I don’t know if I can wait that long.”

“Well, you need to eat something wholesome and nutritious, not just latiao and seaweed.” Fu Jing snatches the bag of the former from Xuanyi’s hands as she speaks. “What did I say about eating this on an empty stomach?!”

“But I’m hungry,” Xuanyi says again, jutting out her lower lip and widening her eyes, and Fu Jing has half a mind to tell her that she’s immune to puppy dog expressions after Gouzi and another half a mind to push her against the counter and—

“Geez, can you two do this somewhere else?” Yamy says. “I want to eat too, but I’m losing my appetite.”

“What do you—” Fu Jing starts to splutter.

Yamy gives her a flat look. “These rooms don’t have the thickest walls.”

Fu Jing closes with an audible click. Xuanyi looks between them for a second, before looking at Yamy and saying, all traces of cuteness gone, “This won’t be a problem, will it?” It’s clear she’s addressing Yamy the leader now.

“As long as it won’t affect group dynamics. But since Fu Jing always acted like a whipped puppy around you, I doubt there’ll be much of a difference.”

“Hey!” Fu Jing protests.

“I’m the one whose leash is in her hands,” Xuanyi says with a wink at Fu Jing, who succumbs to blushing for the umpteenth time.

Yamy makes a face. “I don’t need to know what you two do in the bedroom, thanks. Beyond what I already unfortunately overheard. My poor ears.”

“Then why did you ask what happened between us?” Fu Jing asks.

“Well, I didn’t want to push you to talk about it if you really had fought. But now that I see you’re fine, I figured there’s no point in putting off a talk.” Yamy’s expression turns more serious. “It shouldn’t be something you have to hide. Not from us, anyway. I’m not saying feel free to make out everywhere—”

“We weren’t planning on that,” Fu Jing interjects.

“—and I won’t tell anyone else without your permission, of course, but I hope you know that you can trust us with this. Well, I can’t speak for everyone but I can’t imagine them feeling differently. Your home shouldn’t be somewhere you feel like you have to hide.”

“Thank you, Guo Ying,” Xuanyi says quietly, and Fu Jing knows it’s no coincidence she’s using her real name, not her stage one. They’re not talking to each other as Rocket Girls’ Xuanyi and Yamy, but rather Wu Xuanyi and Guo Ying.

“Yes, thank you,” Fu Jing says, her voice thick with gratitude. “It. It really means a lot.”

“Of course.” Yamy nods, and then breaks into a teasing smile. “So, when Chaoyue said that you two were her parents, I don’t think this is what she had in mind. Are you going to make her another sibling?”

“I don’t know if we’re ready for that,” Xuanyi says solemnly. “Chaoyue is already too much to handle.”

“Isn’t Meiyun our child too?” Fu Jing says. “A son and a daughter. What more could parents ask for?”

“Why are we talking about parents?” Meiqi says, emerging from down the hall. “Are somebody’s parents coming over?”

Fu Jing gives her a scrutinizing look. If Yamy could hear them, odds are that Meiqi did as well. Sure, she hadn’t said anything in the kitchen earlier, but neither had Yamy.

“Meiqi, I need to tell you something,” Xuanyi says with zero build-up. “Fu Jing and I are together.”

Meiqi’s reply is merely the raise of an eyebrow. “Finally. I thought I was going to have to bear you two sneaking mooning glances at each other forever.”

“Okay, why did everyone seem to know we were going to get together except me?” Fu Jing complains.

“You can be a little slow,” Xuanyi says, patting her hand, “but it’s okay, you got there in the end.”

Fu Jing gives her a sulky look, but Xuanyi smiles at her, warm and fond and just a little teasing, and she can’t maintain her brooding in the face of that smile. She can’t believe that she gets to have that smile directed at her all the time, a sight to wake up for in the morning, to fall asleep to at night, a hand to hold and be held by, a shoulder to cry and lean and laugh on, an ear to confide in and sing into, a person whose gravity will draw her in but never let her fall alone, as they finally found that one person to share the universe with.

“Good thing I did,” Fu Jing says and, forgetting about everyone else in the room, leans in to taste that smile.

A/N: I started this in November and got majorly stuck with it for months and then something just unlocked in me today and - BAM. Is it a coincidence that it's Fu Jing's birthday? Probably. I think not! Anyway, happy birthday to my (Xuanyi's) beautiful girl, our favourite badao zongcai, little lion cub, Fu Handsome. May you have a wonderful birthday filled with great food and great peoaple. I love you <3