Finals were a curse for everyone but me. I kept busy, studying with Sohee and Bom in my room and at the library. I only saw Jiyong in passing when the schedules changed for tests. I went home with Bom for winter break, thankful that Top had stayed with Jiyong so I wouldn’t suffer their constant displays of affection.

The last four days of break I caught a cold, giving me a good reason to stay in bed. Jiyong said he wanted to be friends, but he hadn’t called. It was a relief to have a few days to wallow in self-pity. I wanted to get it out of my system before returning to school.

The return trip to Seoul seemed to take years. I was eager to start the spring semester, but I was far more eager to see Jiyong again.

The first day of classes, a fresh energy had swept over the campus along with a blanket of snow. New courses meant new friends and a new beginning. I didn’t have a single class with Jiyong, Donghae, Top or Bom, but Kwanghee was in all but one of mine.

I anxiously waited for Jiyong at lunch, but when he came in he simply winked at me and then sat at the end of the table with the rest of his frat brothers. I tried to concentrate on Bom and Kwanghee’s conversation about the last football game of the season, but Jiyong’s voice kept catching my attention. He was regaling tales of his adventures and brushes with the law he’d had over break, and news of Jo’s new girlfriend they’d met one night while they were at the Red Door. I braced myself for mention of any girl he’d brought home or met, but if he had, he wasn’t sharing it with his friends.

Red and gold metallic balls still hung from the ceiling of the cafeteria, blowing with the current of the heaters. I pulled my cardigan around me, and Kwanghee noticed, hugging me to him and rubbing my arm. I knew that I was paying far too much attention to Jiyong’s general direction, waiting for him to look up at me, but he seemed to have forgotten that I was sitting at the table.

He seemed impervious to the hordes of girls that approached him after news of our breakup, but he was also content with our relationship returning to its platonic state, however strained. We had spent almost a month apart, leaving me nervous and unsure about how to act around him.

Once he finished his lunch, my heart fluttered when he walked up behind me and rested his hands on my shoulders.

“How’s your classes, Top?” he asked.

Top’s face pinched. “First day . Hours of syllabi and class rules. I don’t even know why I show up the first week. How about you?”

“Eh … it’s all part of the game. How ’bout you, Butterfly?” he asked.

“The same,” I said, trying to keep my voice casual.

“Did you have a good break?” he asked, playfully swaying me from side to side.

“Pretty good,” I said. I tried my best to sound convincing.

“Sweet. I’ve got another class. Later.”

I watched him make a beeline for the doors, shoving them both open, and then lighting a cigarette as he walked.

“Huh,” Bom said in a high-pitched tone. She watched Jiyong cut across the greens through the snow and then shook her head.

“What?” Top asked.

Bom rested her chin on the heel of her hand, seeming vexed. “That was kind of weird, wasn’t it?”

“How so?” Top asked, flicking Bom’s red braid back to brush his lips across her neck.

Bom smiled and leaned into his kiss. “He’s almost normal … as normal as Ji can be. What’s up with him?”

Top shook his head and shrugged. “I don’t know. He’s been that way for a while.”

“How backward is that, Dara? He’s fine and you’re miserable,” Bom said, unconcerned with listening ears.

“You’re miserable?” Top asked with a surprised expression.

My mouth fell open and my face flamed with instant embarrassment. “I am not!”

She pushed her salad around in the bowl. “Well, he’s damn near ecstatic.”

“Drop it, Bommie,” I warned.

She shrugged and took another bite. “I think he’s faking it.”

Top nudged her. “Bom? You goin’ to the Valentine’s Day date party with me or what?”

“Can’t you ask me like a normal boyfriend? Nicely?”

“I have asked you … repeatedly. You keep telling me to ask you later.”

She slumped in her chair, pouting. “I don’t wanna go without Dara.”

Top’s face screwed with frustration. “She was with Jiyong the whole time last time. You barely saw her.”

“Quit being a baby, Bom,” I said, throwing a stick of celery at her.

Kwanghee elbowed me. “I’d take you, Cupcake, but I’m not into the fratboy thing, sorry.”

“That’s actually a damn good idea,” Top said, his eyes bright.

Kwanghee grimaced at the thought. “I’m not Big Bang, Top. I’m not anything. Fraternities are against my religion.”

“Please, Kwanghee?” Bom asked.

“Déjà vu,” I grumbled.

Kwanghee looked at me from the corner of his eye and then sighed. “It’s nothing personal, Dara. I can’t say I’ve ever been on a date … with a girl.”

“I know.” I shook my head dismissively, waving away my deep embarrassment. “It’s fine. Really.”

“I need you there,” Bom said. “We made a pact, remember? No parties alone.”

“You’ll hardly be alone, Bommie. Quit being so dramatic,” I said, already annoyed with the conversation.

“You want dramatic? I pulled a trash can beside your bed, held a box of Kleenex for you all night, and got up to get you cough medicine twice when you were sick over break! You owe me!”

I wrinkled my nose. “I have kept your hair vomit free so many times, Park Bom!”

“You sneezed in my face!” she said, pointing to her nose.

I blew my bangs from my eyes. I could never argue with Bom when she was determined to get her way. “Fine,” I said through my teeth.

“Kwanghee?” I asked him with my best fake smile. “Will you go to the stupid Big Bang Valentine’s date party with me?”

Kwanghee hugged me to his side. “Yes. But only because you called it stupid.”

I walked with Kwanghee to class after lunch, discussing the date party and how much we were both dreading it. We picked out a pair of desks in our Physiology class, and I shook my head when the professor began my fourth syllabus of the day. The snow began to fall again, drifting against the windows, politely begging entrance and then falling with disappointment to the ground.

After class was dismissed, a boy I’d met only once at the Big Bang house knocked on my desk as he walked by, winking. I offered a polite smile and then glanced over to Kwanghee. He shot me a wry grin, and I gathered my book and laptop, shoving them into my backpack with little effort.

I lugged my bag over my shoulders and trudged to Morgan along the salted sidewalk. A small group of students had started a snowball fight on the greens, and Kwanghee shuddered at the sight of them, covered in colorless powder.

I wobbled my knee, keeping Kwanghee company as he finished his cigarette. Bom scurried beside us, rubbing her bright green mittens together.

“Where’s Top?” I asked.

“He went home. Jiyong needed help with something, I guess.”

“You didn’t go with him?”

“I don’t live there, Dara.”

“Only in theory,” Kwanghee winked at her.

Bom rolled her eyes. “I enjoy spending time with my boyfriend, so sue me.”

Kwnghee flicked his cigarette into the snow. “I’m heading out, ladies. I’ll see you at dinner?”

Bom and I nodded, smiling when Kwanghee first kissed my cheek and then Bom’s. He stayed on the wet sidewalk, careful to stay in the middle so that he wouldn’t miss and step into the snow.

Bom  shook her head at his efforts. “He is ridiculous.”

“He’s not used to the snow.”

She giggled and pulled me toward the door.

“Dara!”

I turned to see Donghae jogging past Kwanghee. He stopped, catching his breath a moment before he spoke. His puffy grey coat heaved with each breath,and I chuckled at Bom’s curious stare as she watched him.

“I was … whew! I was going to ask you if you wanted to grab a bite to eat tonight.”

“Oh. I uh … I already told Kwanghee I’d eat with him.”

“All right, it’s no big deal. I was just going to try that new burger place downtown. Everyone’s saying it’s really good.”

“Maybe next time,” I said, realizing my mistake. I hoped that he wouldn’t take my flippant reply as a postponement. He nodded and shoved his hands in his pockets, quickly walking back the way he came.

Sohee was reading ahead in her brand-new books, grimacing at Bom and I when we walked in. Her demeanor hadn’t improved since we’d returned from break.

Before, I had spent so much time at Jiyong’s that Sohee’s insufferable comments and attitude were tolerable. Spending every evening and night with her during the two weeks before the semester ended made my decision not to room with Bom more than just regrettable.

“Oh, Sohee. How I’ve missed you,” Bom said.

“The feeling is mutual,” Sohee grumbled, keeping her eyes on her book.

Bom chatted about her day and plans with Top for the weekend. We scoured the internet for funny videos, laughing so hard we were wiping away tears. Sohee huffed a few times at our disruption, but we ignored her.

I was grateful for Bom’s visit. The hours passed so quickly that I didn’t spend a moment wondering if Jiyong had called until she decided to call it a night.

Bom yawned and looked at her watch. “I’m going to bed, Da … aw, !” she said, snapping her fingers. “I left my makeup bag at Top’s.”

“That’s not a tragedy, Bommie,” I said, still giggling from the latest video we’d watched.

“It wouldn’t be if I didn’t have my birth control in there. C’mon. I have to go get it.”

“Can’t you just get Top to bring them?”

“Jiyong has his car. He’s at the Red with Jo.”

I felt sick. “Again? Why is he hanging out with Jo so much, anyway?”

Bom shrugged. “Does it matter? C’mon!”

“I don’t want to run into Jiyong. It’ll be weird.”

“Do you ever listen to me? He’s not there, he’s at the Red. Come on!” she whined, tugging on my arm.

I stood up with mild resistance as she pulled me from the room.

“Finally,” Sohee said.

We pulled up to Jiyong’s apartment, and I noted that the Harley was parked under the stairs, and that Top’s Charger was missing. I breathed a sigh of relief and followed Bom up the icy steps.

“Careful,” she warned.

If I’d known how unsettlin