"Ani, I'm telling youuu- there's no way he's just gonna leave her like that."

"I don't trust him enoughhh.. Clearly, he doesn't know what he wants."

"But that's the point! Soojin is helping him understand himself more, it's a first for him you knowww? He needs some time."

Keeping myself a step behind them, I smiled as the two staff members engaged in an animated conversation about a fairly recent drama series.

"Soonae-yah?" One of them asked, turning to look at me. "What do you think about it? The situation."

"Me?" I gave a thoughtful hum. "Well, I guess the guy could have gone about it another way. The way things are now, the girl is hurting even more because she doesn't know what's going on."

"Right??" The other eonni chimed in. "He just up and left without telling her anything."

"Aniyaaa, I keep telling you- Yah, Soonae, do you think he'll come back to her? He just needs time to sort out his emotions, right?"

As cute as I felt their enthusiasm for this drama was, I tried to think seriously about my answers.

"Well..." I began, feeling a bit empathetic towards the female lead. "For her sake, I hope that's the case, and that he'll come back. It would've been nice if he was thinking straight from the start, but..." I found myself hesitating. "...I guess he's human too, huh?"

"Exactly."

I giggled at the other woman's utterance of exhaustion as she briefly tilted her head to the side. "I still don't trust him though," she said.

I understood how she felt. It really is frustrating knowing that a situation like that could have gone better, had the other person been more careful and honest from the start. It's even more frustrating being able to understand that person's mistakes; being able to forgive them even though you were wronged by them. There's always a part of you that's in constant rebellion, asking, 'What about me? What about my feelings??'

I could relate to all of that very well.

"Aedeul-ahhh~"

Eonni's voice brought me out of my thoughts. When I peeked past her, I saw a group of boys, seemingly in their teens. With shy smiles, they all greeted us as they passed by.

"Are you working hard?" The other woman asked. We had stopped in our tracks and were now turned in their direction.

There was a clumsy, but adorable chorus of Ne's and other positive responses from the boys as they also turned around.

"Great! Keep at it, okayyy?"

They gave a more unified response this time, before formally telling us goodbye.

"Annyeonghigaseyooo," I had said along with the eonnies, my response a bit delayed as I found myself distracted while looking at the group. Once they were on their way again, we continued walking in the opposite direction. "Who were they?" I asked, poking my head between the other two's shoulders.

"Ahh, they're trainees. The company is hoping to debut them."

"Oh? A new idol group?"

"Eoh, Bangtan will finally have a hoobae group from the same company."

"Hehhh. That's nice," I muttered, half to myself. "The trainees look pretty young! They're so cute."

Eonni giggled. "They are, right?"

 

---

 

[Same Day]

It was now August, and I'd started working more freely as of recently.

With PDogg-nim becoming busier with changes in Bangtan's album (particularly the title track that I liked so much), it became difficult for him to give me assignments and review my work. This was beneficial for me, though. As PDogg himself said, 'part of being a producer is working independently...as a producer'. He told me to think of it as my actual job at present and just keep myself busy with making music.

And so, here I was, seated around a table in the mostly empty cafeteria; thoughtfully chewing my radish while listening to a song playing through my earphones.

I leaned forward on an elbow, my cheek rested on that hand, and my chopsticks poised neatly in the other hand by my tray. For a couple seconds, I idly tapped the ends of the chopsticks together; then I put them down and reached for my pencil. I quickly made some barely coherent scribbles next to the lyrics in my book and striked out a few things here and there.

For confirmation, I rewund the song on my phone then quietly sang the revised lyrics along to it. With a satisfied grunt, I nodded to myself and stopped the audio.

From the corner of my eye, I saw someone walking along the hall just outside the cafeteria; I looked in their direction.

Apparently it was two people; Bangtan members.

I'd found that it wasn't very easy to catch a glimpse of the members, even around the company. They would come in for recording, practice, and the occasional meeting; but otherwise, they always seemed to be off on some other behind-the-scenes business.

I mused at the realisation that I usually only saw one pair of members at a time. The only time I'd ever witnessed more than two at once was when I helped with the lunch order, though I'd only spoken to Taehyung back then. For some reason, he also seemed to be the one I was most likely to see around.

This time, he was with one of the members I'd never met personally-- Jimin. I wasn't always with PDogg for recordings, and sometimes the guys would be working with a different producer; so I had yet to actually speak to every one of them.

 

A look of realisation registered on Taehyung's face as he saw me. He didn't say anything, but seemed to greet me with a brief little smile as he paid attention to his friend's words.

I was apparently too dazed to respond in such a short span of time, and felt regretful as he and Jimin walked off towards the other end of the cafeteria. I couldn't help but watch them from that point on, hoping for another chance to properly return the greeting.

To my delight, that chance did come around; a short while later when they'd collected some food and began their search for a good seat. I quickly, but discreetly waved to Taehyung almost as soon as he looked over my side again. He seemed a bit confused, but returned a wave with a amused smile.

Feeling a bit shy now, I returned my focus to my food. I'm being awkward.

All the time I'd spent around Hyejin and the outgoing Big Hit staff and producers had made me forget how clumsy I actually was on my own, when it came to social interaction at least.

"Is it okay to sit here?"

I nearly choked on my noodles. "Ne?" I responded around the food, quickly setting my chopsticks and spoon aside, so I could cover my mouth and catch the drops of broth.

"Is it fine?"

Did he misinterpret my wave just now?

"Ahh, uhm." It was a struggle to finish chewing. I looked up at Taehyung, my expression feeling like it was stuck between confusion and fright.

I glanced past him to see that Jimin was busy dispensing hot water into two cups of ramyeon.

"Ah, if it makes you uncomfortable..." Taehyung turned slightly with his tray.

"Anieyo," I denied, my mouth mostly clear now. I gestured to the seat on his side of the table. "Please."

"Then, I'm sitting~" he said, welcoming himself to the table.

"Neee." Finding it cute, I smiled and watched him settle in. Not knowing what to say from here on, I carefully resumed eating.

"How have you been?" Taehyung asked.

It was a good thing I'd only taken a small bite this time. "Ah...I've been alright. Taehyung-ssi too?"

"Mmmm- Good, I guess."

"You guess? Perhaps...work is difficult?"

"It's not really difficult... Just... These days, there's a lot to do. I'm really tired." He was piling different side dishes onto the rice.

"I guess you would be, huh... Bangtan is always so busy." I pouted. "Take care of your health."

He looked at me as he chewed and gave a thankful smile and nod.

At least he seemed to be doing better than he was the other night. He really did just look a bit tired this time. I glanced around idly now, trying to focus on my food. In these moments, I could feel how much of an introvert I was. Thankfully, the silences didn't seem to be off-putting for Taehyung.

When I looked at him again, I remembered something, and a little giggle escaped me.

"What is it?" Taehyung queried, his eyes round in question.

"Ah... The other night, when I was with my friend."

"Oh, the girl you were with?"

"Mm. She didn't show interest at first, but at some point when we were walking...she suddenly started asking about you. She was saying that we looked like we were in a scene from a drama."

"Jinjjayo?" He chuckled a bit.

"Eoh, she was speaking with this amazed tone, so I found it a bit funny." I started mixing the rest of my anchovies with my rice.

"Is she a bright person? Your friend."

"Bright? Hmm, well, she's confident and funny. It's not like she's always cheerful or anything like that, she's just...hmm...outgoing?"

"Ahhh."

I glanced at him a couple times. "Why'd you ask?" I queried before taking in a spoonful.

"Oh, you two just seemed different from each other, so I was curious. You get along well though, huh."

"Mm..." I felt sentimental. "Hyejin is my best friend. I don't know what I'd do without her."

Taehyung paused his eating to offer a touched expression, causing me to laugh a bit.

"That's good.. That's how I feel too, about Jimin."

So he was close to Jimin. Even more than Jeongguk, it seemed.

I stared at him now, puzzled as he suddenly turned in his seat to look behind him. He turned to look at the other side of the room now, and his features relaxed into an almost blank expression.

I traced his gaze over to Jimin, who was sitting and talking with a couple guys who had been there from before.

"Yahhh," Taehyung breathed in disbelief. "Park Jimin!"

All three of them looked in our direction. Jimin raised his eyebrows in question, one of his cheeks stuffed with food.

Taehyung gave a questioning shrug.

Jimin repeated the action.

Taehyung gestured to our table.

Jimin gestured to his table.

Taehyung gave him the look.

Jimin gave him a look, but couldn't suppress a smile. He turned back around in his seat.

I snickered at the scene.

"Excuse me a moment," Taehyung said to me. As I nodded my reassurance, he got to his feet and made his way over to his friend. I watched in amusement as they playfully wrestled each other.

They were talking now, Taehyung complaining as he sat down, and Jimin cutely feigning ignorance.

 

The little remaining food on my tray was just about finished by the time Taehyung returned to our table, a cup of ramyeon in his hand.

"Is everything okay?" I asked as he sat back down.

"Eoh. He's just being weird."

Despite my curiosity, I didn't question it. I looked at Jimin, who was now apparently watching us. He greeted me wordlessly with a polite nod, and I did the same.

"Oh? You finished eating, huh."

I looked at Taehyung now, a bit alert. "Ah, ne... I'm sorry for finishing first..."

"Anieyo, if you need to go, don't feel pressured to stay here."

My mind was filled with hesitant thoughts. Leaving him by himself is a bit... I mean, he even chose to sit with me instead of the people he knows...

Well, I didn't have anything in particular that I needed to do at the moment. Maybe it would be better to stick around for a bit rather than impose on anyone's studio or office; everyone was pretty busy with recordings and planning schedules and whatnot. Of course there was also the option of heading home, but I would rather avoid that one. Hyejin was probably too busy with her summer classes too, so going to her wouldn't make much sense...

"It's really okay, since I have nowhere else to be right now..." I concluded aloud.

"Ah, geuraeyo?"

"Mm." I suppose I could entertain a conversation or two. "Ah, Taehyung-ssi... I've heard that you're a bit older than me. Please feel free to speak more casually."

"Oh? You were born in ninetyyy...?"

"Six. April."

"Ahhh, not that far," he said, half to himself as he mixed his food again. "Geurae."

I quietly watched him eat for the next few seconds.

His eyelashes are so long. I considered complimenting them, but opted not to. Instead, I looked over at my book and idly began flipping the pages as I thought about what else I could work on in the meantime.

"Do you write songs?" Taehyung asked.

"Hm? Oh, mhm. I usually write a lot of lyrics, but I don't always complete them. Some of these songs are more like little poems right now."

"But that's fine. Sometimes you just need to write down something that sorta.. gives you a feel. Right?"

"Mm," I agreed, noting the subtle satoori that mingled with a couple of his words. "Do you also write songs?"

"Eoh. They're still unreleased though..." He added, a bit shyly. "But well, I made songs for Bangtan's albums. And there was one that we released recently- my collaboration with.. Ah, do you know Namjun-hyung? RM?"

"Ah ne, we've met."

"Well, we released a song together for a special event."

"Oh? The two of you?"

He nodded.

"Wuah. I wonder what kind of song it was."

"I personally really like it. Hyung did a great job too, so I was thankful towards him."

Taehyung regarded the song with a fondness that I couldn't help but find precious. I thought for probably the third time now that he really was a mysterious person; but the more I learned about him, the more interested I became.

"It's called four o'clock," he said. "Listen to it soon, okay?"

"Neee~ I'll find it and listen well."

As he chewed, he gave a thumbs up.

Once he was mostly finished with that mouthful of food, he looked at me again, his eyes suddenly a bit expectant and bright. "Ah, I want to hear your songs too. You should share them sometime."

I felt a bit shy. "Mm, sure. Whenever you're ready."

 

The rest of the lunch period was spent like that too, with Taehyung making conversation with me while eating. I could tell that he was the social butterfly type of person. It was a little overwhelming for someone like me, who was more of a wallflower; but I found some relief in the innocent nature of his curiosity.

He wanted to know the usual things, like how I ended up at Big Hit, and if I was enjoying studying music; which instruments I played, and how I learned to play them... On that note, he had mentioned the brief, but memorable time he'd spent learning to play the saxophone in his younger days.

Those memories also led to him talking about his love for jazz; which then brought up the topic of our favourite types of songs. We were both amused to find that we actually had very similar tastes in music.

 

Some minutes later, while we were in the midst of an enthusiastic discussion on a certain western artiste's recent album release, someone came to our table.

"Ah, joesonghabnidaaa," Jimin said carefully. We both looked up at him in question. "Lunch time is over," he began, switching his gaze between us. "So.. they're hoping to close the cafeteria now.."

"Ahhhh," Taehyung and I said in unison.

We both found it kind of funny.

"Alright. Shall we leave?" He asked. With that, we moved to get to our feet.

"Ah, I'll take it for you," Jimin said, setting down his own tray and reaching for mine.

"Aigo, kamsahabnida~"

"Hohhhhh, Jimin-ssiiiii."

Jimin smiled, but otherwise paid no attention to his friend as he packed the bowls and utensils together on the stacked trays.

While the two of them went towards the buffet area, I adjusted my pencil neatly between the two most recently used pages of my notebook before closing it.

 

[***]

"Oh, I hope it didn't seem rude," Jimin said to Soonae along the walk down the corridor, after having formally introduced themselves to one another. "I was going to sit there, but...It just... Somehow, it seemed like I would be disturbing something."

"Ahh... Anieyo, it would have been fine."

"That's what I was saying," Taehyung complained.

Soonae smiled, clutching her book in front of her chest.

"Soonae-ssi," Jimin said. "What are you planning on doing now?"

"Oh uhmm... Well, I guess I didn't give it much thought. I guess I'll check in with the management eonnies... My bag is in their office too, so I'll go pack this book away."

"The management department? We'll walk with you until there then."

"Gomawoyo."

"Mm."

 

While Jimin queried about Soonae's age, Taehyung tucked his hands into the pockets of his slacks and stared aimlessly ahead of them, losing himself in thought.

He shifted through the library of self-composed and -written songs in his memory, and tried to pick out the ones he was most proud of. He hadn't revealed these songs to the Big Hit producers as yet; in fact, his hyungs were probably the only people apart from himself who had heard them before. Since meeting and properly speaking to Soonae though, he felt a dying need to have her listen to his work. He figured that she would relate well to it.

With much anticipation welling up inside of him, he confirmed his selection of songs, and returned his consciousness to the present.

"You must be close with the staff," Jimin was saying.

"Mm, the eonnies take good care of me. Oppas too, but they're a bit more distant."

"Eoh, I guess it would be that way... The hyungs at the company are really close with each other and the members though. With the ladies, they're nice but I guess they prefer to sit back and watch over them."

"Wuah, that's kinda cool."

"It is, isn't it?" Jimin agreed, a bit proudly, causing Soonae to laugh.

Taehyung smiled at their interaction. He'd found that while Soonae was a shy girl and generally preferred not to initiate things, she was actually pretty sociable once comfortable enough with the other person. It was somewhat of a charm.

 

"Oh? That's an interesting sighting," said the staff member who had just walked out of the office.

"Waeyo?" Jimin asked.

"The three of you look like chingus from high school."

"Jinjjayo?" Soonae raised her brows in mild surprise.

She made an utterance of awe and realisation when Jimin made the point that he and Taehyung were indeed old high school friends.

"Ah, that's right," the staff said as she recalled the fact. "Well, Soonae fits in nicely too." With a look that conveyed that feeling, and a point of the papers in her hand, she continued on her way down the hall.

The three watched after her.

"Well, I can kinda see it," Jimin said, stepping back and studying Soonae.

Taehyung did the same. "She would have fit in with the crew."

"With Seunghee...Ah, Seunghee would have loved her, wouldn't she?"

"Geucho... She'd be the quiet one though."

Soonae flushed a bit from all the attention and shyly tucked her hair behind her ear, still clutching her book to her chest.

Noticing this, Jimin laughed a bit. "We're giving her too much attention."

Taehyung took that opportunity to get closer, and deliberately stared her down some more. He then moved away with a mischievous smile when she cowered in embarrassment.

"Alright, alright, let's stop troubling her now," Jimin said through his smile, though he was thoroughly amused by the situation. "Soonae-ssi. We'll see you next time."

Soonae accepted his handshake as she tried to suppress her own smile. "See you next time~"

She said it as she looked from Jimin to Taehyung, who regarded her with somewhat of a probing gaze. Realising the sudden question in her expression, he blinked himself back to reality. "Ah ne," he said, offering a hand as well, "let's talk again soon."

"Mm." She accepted it, a spark of curiosity in her eyes as she gave a polite smile.

She was probably wondering what was on his mind; but her guess was as good as his own.

All Taehyung knew at the moment was that there was...something. He wasn't sure what it was, or what exactly it applied to. There was just...something, somewhere inside him; accompanied by the hope that he would see her again.