Walking with my bestfriend, Zico, has been awkward for me ever since he had a girlfriend. I don't talk with him that much since he's always by his girfriend's side, I won't ever argue with that since I don't have the rights to. 

Right now, I'm walking as fast as I can just so I can get away from him before I would tear up just by thinking about it but, before I could run away even more further, He grabed my wrist and made me face him, "What's wrong with you these days?" He asked, worriedly. "Nothing" I answered, bluntly, looking down. "Then why are you being so distant?" He asked, lifting my chin. "I'am not, I'm just tired and not in the mood right now." I replied, taking his hands away from my chin and started walking away. Zico ran to me and blocked my way, holding on my shoulders, "Tell me, what is it? What is the thing that is bothering you?" He asked. "I said NOTHING! I'm just not feeling well! So stop bothering!" I lied.

Actually, I'm hurting inside, the fact that you have a girlfriend kills me, emotionally, I thought.
I just ran away, crying and went to my house, locking the door behind me and slide down on the floor, still crying.
minutes after, Zico came, banging on the door. "YAH! SOOLIM-AH! OPEN THIS DOOR!" Zico Shouted.
"NO!" I shouted, crying. minutes after, Zico might have gotten really angry and pissed that he had unlocked the door, I don't really know why, but I guess he used the key I gave him before.. Shouldn't have given that to him.. -_-
"Soolim-ah, why are you crying?" Zico asked while bending down on my height. "Nothing." I replied, standing up, pushing him to the door. "Don't push me away, Soolim.." Zico said. "What's happening to you?" He asked, Holding my hands.

I can't take it anymore, I cried on his shoulders.
Zico was surprised but he just pats my back. "Soolim, Why are you crying?" Zico asked me again. "You.." I mumbled, crying. "What about me?" He asked, curiously. I looked at him, "Oppa.." I paused.

I should tell him right now, It's now or never. I can't hide my feelings anymore, It's really killing me inside. "Oppa, I...I love you..." I said, quietly. He was at dazed for a while, like he is doubtiong what I just said. "You love me... as... a brother.. right?" He asked.
"No... I love you...as a man, a man I've always wanted to be with..: I replied looking down.
Zico looked at me, shocked. " What do you mean?" He asked. "Oppa, I've always loved you ever since, I have been planning to tell you this before, but I didn't have the guts to. When I was about to tell you last time, I saw you and Sunye unnie, kissing, and that hurts me a lot.. But, I just stayed strong, I wanted you to be happy, So I didn't go against it and just be happy just for you,but everytime I see you two, It hurts me a lot. But, I really need to stay strong just for you..: I said, crying.
Zico was just staring at me then suddenly hugged me. "I'm sorry, but I only see you as a friend, a sister, a family.. Nothing more. You should find a person that will love you back, You should not fall inlove with me even more, since I've already hurted you enough." He said, caressing my back. "I DON'T CARE! I LOVE YOU! PLEASE, LET ME LOVE YOU! I WOULD DO ANYTHING, even if it's meant to take..MY ONLY HAPPINESS." I said, crying loudly. "I'm sorry but, I'm just not the right one for you." He replied.
"Is that so? Then GO! STAY AWAY FROM ME! AND NEVER EVER TALK TO ME! DON'T YOU EVER COMEBACK!" I shouted, crying my heart out and slammed the door infront of him, hard..
Zico didn't do anything and might have just left, I sat on the floor still crying..

Oppa, why can't you love me, like how you love Her?
What did you see in her, that you can't ever see in me?
What's so good about her, that isn't as good as I have?, I thought.

But, what can I do?...Nothing..
I just need to accept the fact that we won't ever be together.

I just nneed to accept the fact that she's the one who he really loves.
I should just let him be happy.
I should just support him since he's my bestfriend.
If that's what makes him happy? then, Fine~
I would give up anything for him...
I would give up...even....
 

My Only Happiness.