It wasn’t easy, nothing was.

            But Jung Eunbi didn’t dwell on that anymore—she was too old to be angry at the world now, that teenage fire gone shortly after she got into college. It made her feel dumb most of the time, because, really, Eunbi was never that rebel teen that got into stupid fights with their parents, no, but she still had that spark of hope and will to change the world. Eunbi felt dumb, to not say pathetic, that this had once been inside her—or maybe what she felt was anger at her current self, disappointment even, that it had gone away.

            Eunbi didn’t have the time to be wondering about that, though, not when she was an international art student with loans starting to grow big and terrifying, rent long overdue and an absent roommate who she figured was stoning behind a building by that time. Eunbi didn’t even remember the girl’s name.

            Heaving a sigh, Eunbi rested the pen on top of her desk, looking forward through the window in front of her. There wasn’t a view, not a pretty one, although she figured that the run-down, brick building wasn’t that bad. Eunbi visited a place that faced a dump when she first got to the city, that was bad. It was cheap, definitely, but not worth it, besides, she was sure no one would agree to bunk with her there. Instead, she signed the lease with a gloomy dude from her college—his father owned a bunch of apartments and made a nice price for students. It was the best she could get, especially considering that she was in a whole other country and her English wasn’t that good.

            Eunbi let her head fall over her sketchbook, page completely blank.

            She missed her family a lot.

            When Eunbi received the news that she had earned a scholarship in the freaking United States, she assumed that it was the best opportunity in her life. It was MICA, one of the best as they had told her, and it sounded like everything she had asked for.

            Eunbi wasn’t aware that if she didn’t achieve certain grades and fell a little short on credits, she wouldn’t have the perks of that scholarship. Eunbi worked hard, she really did, but it was hard to keep up with everything and a couple of part-time jobs, living almost an hour away from the university. She had always been an average student—good enough to stand out with her art, but not enough to get top grades. For a long time, though, that didn’t matter, not much at least, and when she first got there, this wasn’t her main concern.

            Baltimore, Maryland. This is where she was. It was a big city. A lot smaller than Seoul, but still big. Eunbi liked that, because it didn’t feel completely foreign. She felt like big cities had enough resemblances to make it easier to understand how they work. Baltimore was a heaven for art, too, and she loved it. Museums, expositions, plays, music, everything. Perhaps it was because of MICA, but so many genres met there, it was simply stunning.

            Eunbi liked it a lot. She was impressed and wanted nothing but to explore and enjoy that first year. Caught up on that, she really didn’t foresee her inevitable future as her first summer break approached.

            Eunbi didn’t tell her family about it. Losing her scholarship didn’t mean losing her spot there, so Eunbi thought that she could keep working on it—she would make it do and maybe contract a couple of debts here and there, but it’d be fine when she graduated. General Fine Arts was one hell of a course and she enjoyed it. Everything would be fine.

            It wasn’t, obviously, and Eunbi couldn’t bring herself to talk to her parents about it. Rationally, Eunbi knew they loved her, and they would do anything for her, but she couldn’t make herself call them and tell that everything was burning down to ashes. If disappointing herself hurt that much, Eunbi wasn’t sure she could handle doing that to her family. So, she started getting jobs everywhere and the loans only seemed to grow bigger.

            It was only her second year there and Eunbi already felt like she was done for.

            Eunbi probably was.

            Her cellphone rang, startling her a little. Eunbi raised her head and peaked at the flaring screen to feel the anxiety creeping on her neck. It was her landlord, of course it was, and she had no idea what she’d tell him. Rent needed to be paid. Eunbi would have to use her food money to pay the rent, stall a little bit, and her fridge knew that it couldn’t get any emptier. Maybe the convenience store lady would give her crackers to go through the day? Eunbi could plead if she had to. Her situation didn’t exactly allow pride to be first on her priorities list.

            Grabbing her mobile, Eunbi accepted the call and told the man that she’d pay for the two previous months in a week, she promised. The man wasn’t a bad guy, but he was probably growing tired of that—working with students must’ve been exhausting and he probably heard that same speech a couple dozen times—he still grunted and barked out a “fine” and it was enough for now, Eunbi thought, that was good enough.

            Looking at the screen, she sighed at the battery symbol. Her phone was gradually holding up less and less. It was probably due to the fact it was three years old and it had been having technical problems since year one, but Eunbi couldn’t just get another one. The girl just hoped it wouldn’t die on her anytime soon; not having a laptop was troublesome enough, since her college was kind of strict with the computer lab usage for non-academic activities and losing her phone would be simply nightmarish.

            “I seriously need to get my life together, don’t I?” Eunbi stood up from her wooden chair, wincing when a loose part of the seat caught on the warm cloth of her pajamas, pulling a nib of her skin together with it.

            Eunbi glared at the chair and wanted to kick it, but that was pretty much the only chair in the apartment (beside her roommate’s) and she couldn’t afford to pay that to the landlord.

            “Stupid chair,” she’d settled for cursing it then.

            Eunbi cursed a lot of things, in her own sweet way as her friend liked to say, but she still did it. She knew that it had no effective result, but it released a little of tension, so, who cares? It wasn’t like her mother was there to do anything about it.

            I wanted her to, Eunbi sighed, running a hand over her tired face, mom would probably eat my liver if she saw the state of my room.

            Her room was small. It fit a single bed, a double-door wardrobe and her tiny desk just by the bed, under the squared window. Eunbi didn’t usually mind small places, but sometimes it felt a little claustrophobic. When her mind wasn’t in the best place, Eunbi thought the walls to be closing in, taking the little space she had for herself—or kind of. But, then again, Eunbi couldn’t do anything about it. Juggling studies, work and lying to her family kept her busy enough to forget about her room’s size.

            Eunbi’s eyes fell on the backpack lying on her bed. There was an open cookie package inside one of the pockets. Kim Yewon, her friend and the only other South-Korean student in her university, gave it to her, selfless as the younger girl was. The animation student had money problems herself, but she was in a better situation as her parents lived a couple of hours from Baltimore and helped her out sometimes. Eunbi felt guilty to take Yewon’s snacks, nonetheless, and she did her best to keep her friend ignorant about most of her troubles.

            Eunbi thought about eating that for dinner but decided to keep it for breakfast. She had the morning shift at the convenience store the next day and she knew that eating nothing before going was a bad idea. Passing out was definitely out of her to-do list.

            Slumping on the bed, not even caring to take the backpack out of it, she closed her eyes feeling her stomach rumble.

            God, what she would do to get a burger.

            It was downright annoying, everything was.

            Kim Sojung just couldn’t take that country anymore. She had gone there to get her work done and it seemed like every single one of the employees just couldn’t do things right while thinking they were the absolute best at it. Granted, they weren’t used to her work rhythm—maybe she was a little bit of a workaholic, but that was what got her there. If that company wanted her to do her best, they needed to work with her. Properly.

            Sojung looked down at the reports on the hotel’s table and asked herself why she was doing that again. Because I’m good at it, she thought, almost as a mantra. Yeah, this was her job, that’s why she kept doing it, regardless of how utterly exhausting it was sometimes. And people seem to be awfully lost whenever I’m not around. That was also true. Honestly, it amazed her, not to be conceited, how good she was at managing and taking control of situations. Her name wasn’t widely known for nothing, after all.

            General Kim—that’s what her secretary and close friend, Jung Yerin, liked to call her. Sojung found it fitting albeit harsh. She wasn’t that stern; she just got annoyed whenever things didn’t go the way she planned. “A control freak, that’s what you are,” Yerin had said this time they were out drinking, “you’re lucky that you’re good at getting things done.”

            Sojung took it as a compliment, really.

            Of course, her job satisfied her. She got things done one way or the other, got paid well, lived as a queen and managed to travel around the biggest cities on the planet. Sojung didn’t have much to complain about her life. She was recognized by her skills and she was definitely well-paid for them. Wasn’t that what everyone wanted? She had everything.

            At least, that’s what she kept telling herself whenever her stupid heart dared to feel that usual ounce of loneliness.

            Sojung dropped the pile of paper on the table and rested her back on the comfortable sofa, closing her eyes. Her room was, obviously, the best. Well-illuminated, set on a perfect temperature and stunningly decorated—though she considered it more expensive than stunning. With a queen-sized bed and a huge bathroom, it was all designed to give its guest a wonderful stay. Sojung appreciated that, after all, it was all on the company’s expenses, but she didn’t really understand the appeal of it.

            She’d exchange that stuffy hotel room for her penthouse any day, honestly.

            “Now, what do I need to do here,” Sojung mumbled to herself, numbers swimming inside her eyelids. “They aren’t that deep in trouble, but they definitely aren’t going to hold it much longer… damn, I wanted to be home early.”

            Her home, the main one, in South Korea, was a penthouse with a gorgeous view. True, Sojung didn’t spend that much time there, constantly travelling and visiting companies for work, but she liked the idea of having a place of her own. Sojung was also the owner of a couple of other luxury homes in Europe and Asia, in the countries she went to the most. She wasn’t much of a hotel fan, but they weren’t bad, so she didn’t go out of her way to buy an apartment in the US, not yet anyway.

            Sojung had visited New York and Washington a couple of times before, quick visits, but this was her first time in Maryland. She had thought it’d be like any other big city, but for the four days she had been there, she was pleasantly surprised with its atmosphere.

            Yerin liked it quite a lot as well, rambling about going to the Baltimore Museum of Art before returning to South Korea all the time. There was something different about that city; Sojung couldn’t point it out, but she knew there was. It was almost as if it breathed art and exhaled happiness.

            Alright, maybe that wasn’t a really good analogy, but hey, Sojung tried her best. Bottom line was: she liked the city.

            Whenever she had visited the States, she didn’t have much of a desire to play the tourist and get to know the town. New York was noisy and shiny, and she found it nice, but not nice enough to get into a bus and go around. Washington was… well, Washington. Sojung didn’t go to much places there, sticking to the hotel and the meeting rooms.

            It hadn’t even crossed her mind to buy a place in the USA, not until Maryland.

            It was her fourth time in the country, after all, she reasoned, and, yes, it was huge, but it was probably the time to get a place of her own there. Sojung was sure this would be a wise move.

            So, there she was, contemplating the idea of buying herself a home in the USA, especially since she was sure that those jobs opportunities were going to keep coming. Sojung made a mental note about asking Yerin the most profitable and strategic locations, but she’d probably settle for a place there, in Baltimore. Her secretary usually stayed in hotels, even if Sojung had an apartment, always talking about privacy and getting Sojung out of her face for a few seconds, but perhaps she’d be tempted to a buy or rent something there too.

            “Should I send Yerin a message now?” Sojung wondered, but quickly dismissed the idea. Yerin had told her she’d be MIA until morning and that meant she’d be exploring the night life and other stuff there.

            Grimacing, Sojung thought that Yerin’s drive was something admirable. She had no idea how the younger had the energy to work all day long and still go flirt with whatever pretty girl she encountered. Sojung definitely didn’t have it. “I’m tired, but I don’t let that stop me. That’s kind of your problem,” Yerin snorted when Sojung had once mentioned her admiration, “going to work and then home doesn’t do squat. The pretty girls won’t come to you, eonni.”

            Sojung told her she didn’t want any pretty girls and Yerin had a laughing fit.

            Frowning, Sojung reiterated that in the silence of her room. “I’m doing good like this. Resting is definitely more important than going around for tail.”

            Maybe there was jealousy in her voice, but nobody was there to call her out on it.

            Standing up from the sofa, Sojung glanced at the scattered sheets of paper. This was one hell of a complicated case and she was getting irritated that most of what made it complicated were stupid work antics.

            However, that could be solved with an early meeting she’d be sure to arrange as soon as she stepped into the company the next day. Those employees, regardless of rank, would not keep on doing that, not under her watch.

            Looking at her cell phone and the dozen unread email notifications, Sojung thought that she could call it a day after answering them. She got her tablet from her purse and walked to the bed.

            Leaning on the fine pillows, Sojung unblocked the screen.

            Just a few answers and then she could sleep.

            A messy inbox made her uneasy.