They departed Roof And just a few minutes before closing time. Andy took the wheel and bid goodbye to Eric, who was holding a camera. Shinhwa’s maknae flashed a shy smile at Eric’s GoPro before starting the engine and wheeling away, a waving Eric on his side mirror. Andy chuckled before turning a left turn on the gate leading out of the vicinity. “Hyung never changes.”

Minwoo has been looking at Andy the whole time. While he fastened his seatbelt, while the younger man bid Shinhwa’s leader with twinkling eyes. These scenes before Minwoo, who looked at the car airconditioner and sought comfort in the coolness that seem to be a feathery caress on the hairs of his forearms. He has rolled his sweater. He found it warm inside his own café.

“You might be tired, Andy. You don’t need to drop hyung in his home.” Minwoo casually remarked, and eyed Andy, who flashed him his innocent, solemn pair of eyes. There were deep grooves under his eyes, caused by stress at work, and it has been a running joke in television shows how Andy looked the oldest. But in Minwoo’s eyes, Andy will always be, always be their youngest that makes his heart flutter.

He sincerely means it in one of his fanmeetings what he said before, about what it feels like hugging the members. Jinnie feels like being enveloped in hot packs, their second youngest is as warm as getting a fever under a blanket on a summer’s day. Jinnie sweats a lot too, probably because his metabolism is fast and high.

Dongwan feels like a rock due to his corded muscles under his smooth skin. Bronzed, and tanned, Dongwan shares his sentiments when it comes to intimacy, and is close near an exhibitionist as he is.

Getting near Hyesung is almost as close to seeing a rare blood moon. Minwoo rather not risk getting his back or knees kicked with Hyesung’s capacity for taekwondo.

Eric’s feel like a fake one, and they have laughed about it both. But it certainly feels exactly like that. Minwoo doesn’t know if it is his subconscious at work, but it is the first term that crossed his mind.

Andy, now Andy is an entirely different story. Minwoo has never felt something as remotely close to the others what he feels for Andy. Whenever he wraps his arms on the slim waist of the younger boy, and Andy flashes him a shy smile as he turns to look at him, breathless from a concert, or through playing, Minwoo could not help but think, shy type and cool type are a deadly combination.

“Now worries, Minwoo hyung.” Andy commented under his breath. “I promised Eric hyung to take you home.”

“I insist, Andy ya.”

“I am good, thank you for your concern, hyung.”

Minwoo slumped back on his seat and looked at Andy, feeling a bit small. He has noticed that Andy could never say no to Eric, however much annoying Eric could get. He remembers clearly in that one episode in Shinhwa Broadcast wherein Jinnie needs to be admitted to the hospital to recuperate and they have to make the show funny on their own. Dongwan tried his hardest being a funny partner to Eric, but Eric in the end chose to re-enact a kissing scene with Andy. Dongwan gave an apologetic look in his direction, his eyes saying, he tried. Minwoo has no choice but to be a casual onlooker despite the whole thing happening.

He remembered clearly how Eric did his lines profoundly, and how Andy softly retaliated but gave in nonetheless. Andy can never say no to Eric, can never say no to his hyung. Minwoo watched as Eric gave a light peck on Andy’s soft cheeks, while all Minwoo sees in his mind’s eye then was how much Andy hated his kisses during the Olympic episode, and how his denial hurt him so.

Many years have passed, but Minwoo still nurse a bruise in his heart that no one could ever heal. He can dance in front of many people, strip, and his jacket, make the girls go crazy, wild, the crowd dancing to his music in his every concert. But he knows however much he try, the only person he wants to look at him, to share his joy, to give him even one bit of affection, will never look his way, the same way Andy’s eyes is fixated on the road, going nearer and closer to both their homes.

Andy will need to drop Minwoo first in his parent’s house, and then he will proceed to go back in his own apartment.

“Andy…”

“Yes, hyung?”

Andy took his eyes off the road for a second, and looked at Minwoo. Minwoo’s eyes has grown solemn, and Andy stopped the car for a moment. They parked a street away to Minwoo’s parents’ house. Night has come upon them, and Andy has the light inside the car. He does not know what’s going on, and can only surmise that Minwoo has been tired entertaining them the whole day in his café, most especially Eric hyung who has brought his GoPro toy and filmed them nonstop in all possible angles that he can.

“What’s wrong, hyung?”

Minwoo looked at Andy. Andy who has grown to possess broad shoulders, Minwoo has spanned them as they grew up together, as he enveloped him in his arms, wanting to protect him from the world. Andy, who he cried for during the Guerilla Concert and won’t accept that he will be left out and pried away from Shinhwa. Andy, who almost debuted with High-five of Teenagers (H.O.T.), and should it not only for divine intervention have they been forever separated, and never debut together.

Andy, Andy, Andy.

Andy, who has grown in America, and met Eric there, them with a past that he will never, ever know. It is a time in their youth that no twenty and more so years can gap, bridge, and put asunder, erased, or even forgotten. A figment of time that he will never be a part of.

“Nothing. Just, I love you.”

Andy flashed a good boy smile. “Me too.”

That’s what’s wrong, and Minwoo’s eyes crinkled at the corners, as he gave his signature angel smile, and Andy started the car again for the last stretch of the trip. The moon is bright and round overhead as the darkness surrounded them. Even from millions of miles away, the moonlight continues to cast shadow over everything tall over the good earth, and it has lost count how many sad hearts have whispered their fervent, and sincere wishes under the pretense of sleep.