Inkigayo

He has had enough. It’s the third time today but last week was just the same and he is losing it. He stares, viciously, at the innocent sandwich on the table that has “Jinwoo” write with a marker on the film and frowns, distressed.

He opens it and, in between the layers of bread, there is a folded paper with a number that he tosses away with satisfaction.

“Do you want a sandwich, hyung?” he asks, turning around to face the cause of all his problems, the reason why he can’t take another bite of Inkigayo sandwiches. Jinwoo looks up at him from the screen of his phone and shakes his head, smiling.

“You can have it if you want. Or we can bring it home”. But at home they have a lot already storage (from the previous weeks since there is not a day that Jinwoo doesn’t get one of these special grinders with an extra ingredient that Minho always makes sure to remove before offering it to his mate, lying to him about it origin; Jinwoo doesn’t need to know that, out there, there is someone interested in him other than Minho - though he doesn’t know about it, either).

In the end, Song Minho eats the sandwich (it tastes like victory). He is munching it when, through the door, Seunghoon peeks at him.

“And he got another one,” he says to Seungyoon, sitting on the couch of the waiting room. They are done with the recording and now they are waiting for the votes to be closed and the winner of the week revealed.

Normally, in between, they would go home, take a shower and come back to the stage later but today it’s a lazy day, so they have decided to stay in SBS Open Hall instead, meeting with other groups and chatting among themselves. “He is getting some weight,” he points out with a soft smile. “Jinwoo hyung is relieved; he has been worried about how slim Minho was becoming lately, but now he is eating a lot. I wonder why,” and there is some playfulness and teasing on it as if knowing. He walks toward Seungyoon, sitting next to him.

“He doesn’t need to eat them,” Seungyoon replies his chin already on Seunghoon’s shoulder, the oldest kissing the blonde curls of his hair. “We aren’t forcing him”.

“But we should tell him. Or stop it, babe” he answers, stealing a kiss out of his plump lips. It is quick but it eases Seungyoon, who smiles softly at Seunghoon.

“It’s for his own good. Minho needs a boost to confess to Jinwoo. If he thinks there is competition…” he explains but Seunghoon already knows; they have talked about it before, they have been running this business for a while now.

“It’s been three weeks and he hasn’t done the smallest move to approach the objective,” Seunghoon complains, “and I’m running out of cash. The store clerk looks at me as if I’m a weirdo for buying so many sandwiches. They might think I’m selling them outside the station” and this makes Seungyoon laugh (Seunghoon always finds ways to surprise Seungyoon).

“Ok, then, we will stop getting them to Jinwoo,” he promises, sealing it with a kiss on the palm of Seunghoon’s hand, before falling asleep on top of his lap. Seunghoon brushes gently his hair and lets the younger rest (it has been a rough, tire day).

Minho stares at Jinwoo. He is watching his favourite drama and Minho was on his way to the studio, but Jinwoo, relaxed, with no make-up and his hair dropping tears on his face, legs crossed on the couch and his gaze on the screen was just a view too good to miss. But he has been on a corner, fully dressed, for twenty minutes and hasn’t managed to break out of his own enchantment.

“Are you going, Minho?” Jinwoo asks, looking at him with a soft smile. From the TV comes the white noises of the adverts. Minho nods, rushing to the door, cheeks fully red and his heart beating fast and loud, leaving a puzzled Jinwoo.

He is lucky to have someone like Jinwoo around, someone to rely on. Someone that is kind and nice and always there to cheer him, to help. And, honestly, he is dangerously beautiful; Minho isn’t shocked that so many other artists want to date him but this will be his own, personal privilege (because he has fallen in love first, he has been there since the beginning: when Jinwoo had no confidence but rewarded Minho with his best smile anyway, laughing at all the silly things he did just for the sake of hearing it).

Minho looks at the lights hanging on the ceiling of his studio, thinking about Jinwoo, about the way he makes him feel; mayhap it’s time to let it go, to stop being stubborn, waiting for him to notice and sabotaging any change for Jinwoo to be happy with anybody else. Until now everything has been great but he is getting tired of wasting love, of knowing that Jinwoo is indifferent to all his betterments; that he considers him his best friend at most and it breaks Minho’s heart; he can only get crumbs (when someone else can get Jinwoo’s full course).

It’s not true that Jinwoo is indifferent to Minho, or just oblivious. He knows (because Minho is so clear, so blatant only a fool wouldn’t get him - and Jinwoo might seem one, but he is observant and patient). He has been waiting for Minho. He never mentioned anything in fears that Minho would chicken out, frightened, too afraid of his own feelings or Jinwoo’s advancements. He is waiting for Minho to take the lead, to do the first move, to tell him something tangible, real (not dreams and fantasies, parts of songs and lyrics). He doesn’t want to rush what they have despite fully knowing about Minho’s sentiments for him. He has seen them blooming, he has watered them with care and tears, he has kept them safe, nourishing them with more than a friendship that was never mentioned, never said (a secret between them that is unknown to Minho).

And he has told everything to Seunghoon (because he obligated him to spill the beans about his feelings - though for him were more than obvious and clean).

“We need to come up with something better, love,” Seunghoon says, cuddling in bed between Seungyoon, Thor and Haute.

“Minho is just too coward to tell hyung that he loves him. He thought that Jinwoo is listless about him. He told me that he would like him to date, so he might have given up,” he explains, rubbing his nose against Seunghoon’s neck.

“And Jinwoo is way too gentle to ask first, of course. Also, he is kind of waiting for Minho to be ready. But he will never be, it’s a fact,” he replies.

“Perhaps we should talk to them. This situation is so stressing… At some point they’ll have to face reality: that they are in love,” Seungyoon says, remarking the truth that they both are aware of.

“We better tell Minho and see what he does, since Jinwoo knows”, decides Seunghoon and, next to him, Seungyoon agrees, kissing his cheek.

It’s early after the rehearsal. The sun is barely coming in and Jinwoo is, again, focused on his gaming. Minho is taking pictures of him from afar and Seunghoon and Seungyoon are plotting, talking between them secretively.

“It is now or never,” Seunghoon says and they both corner Minho and drag him to an empty hall. Minho looks at them, pissed out (he was about to take the best photo of Jinwoo, with the dawn painting his eye and colouring his hair red).

“You have to confess to him. He will say yes,” Seunghoon, always practical, tells.

“What?” maybe it is because it’s too early, maybe it is because Minho is dumb, but Seungyoon pities him and explains, detailedly, everything.

“But there are so many other artists willing to do just the same… Last week he got three letters that I had to throw away,” he says, belittling himself, “he’ll better be suited with someone else, someone like Jennie…”

“Did you ever try? Beside… There is something you should know,” Seungyoon starts, looking gullible.

“We were the ones sending Jinwoo the sandwiches,” Seunghoon says, worried. “We did it in order to make you feel jealous and confess. But you didn’t do anything but eat them all and gain most needed weight”, he explains and Minho is glimpsing them in awe, eyes about to pop out of his sockets.

“You did it, you bastards!” he yells once reality sinks into his head.

Jinwoo’s suitors were his two friends. All his worries, all the staying up at night, all the thinking and hurting, all was in vain, all was for nothing; Jinwoo has no one else who loves him the way he does. He has been living in a lie, a parallel world; he has been fooled and now he has no time to waist (since he has wasted too much, waiting and wondering and considering himself not a good match, someone unworthy of Jinwoo since he has many others to chose).

This is the first time Jinwoo finds a paper inside an Inkigayo sandwich, but he has heard about it (it was an infamous gossip at first, then it became real and now he has a note on his hand saying to, please, call him).

He knows the number by heart. He doesn’t need to call him, he will tell him all later on, back home.

Never a sandwich has tasted so good (like summer, kisses and Minho).