Mark sat in a chair beside the bed where his wife lay down, sleeping peacefully. He put his hand on his head and rubbed his temples while closing his eyes. He couldn't believe that this was it.

The moment he doesn't want to remember. The moment he wishes that everything is going to be okay. The moment he wishes that his wife shouldn't be in a hospital bed instead running around with their kids and baking cookies and watching movies or drama, going on dates while the kids stay on either their parents or friends. He sighed and stared at his wife.

His thinning black hair, his once pink lips were turning slight blue with each second pass. His brown eyes that were under lids were becoming grey.

"Don't leave me and Jisung and Chenle alone, love" Mark held his cold hand in his and whispered.

He laid motionless. The heart monitor was telling him that he is still alive. He closes his eyes. Soon he felt a squeeze on his hand as he lifted his head that we're resting on the railing of the bed. He was met by the brown eyes that he fell for. It was his eyes that have him captivated and in awe. He smiles weakly at him and he smiles back. His eyes twinkles as he saw Mark's face. He gave a little cough and Mark was quick to give him water as he gulp down half of the cup. He smiled at Mark thankfully and he smile back before lifting his hand and giving it a kiss. He watches him then suddenly, two black hairs popped up on the door with their bright brown and black eyes.

He smiled at the sight of his identical twins and motioned for them to come forward weakly. His mother trailing behind the children as Jisung and Chenle walked towards him and sat on either side of him on the bed with the help of Mark and his mother.

The children chatted away, telling him how their day went and how they went and bought a present for him when Taeyong brought them to the mall to get them away from the hospital a bit. He smiled as he saw what the children bought him. It was a bracelet with their birthstone of each of the family. He smiled and hugged the children as a way of saying thank you. Jisung and Chenle beamed at him and kiss his cheek.

The doctor came in with a sad look on her face and the family knew what was going to happen next.

Taeyong quickly asked the kids if they wanted ice cream and the 5 year olds nodded their heads oblivious of the fact that their mother is about to die and gave him and Mark a kiss on their cheeks before following their grandmother out of the room with the doctor following behind them. Leaving him and Mark alone.

Mark quickly avert his eyes back to him as he in a breathe.

"Minhyungie..." His wife croaked, Mark looked at him and shook his head

"Don't talk. You're to weak" Mark told him.

He smiled at his husband and shook his head.

"Tell everyone I love them..." he stopped and Mark closed his eyes.

Mark will definitely miss him. He will definitely miss his smile, his voice, his laugh and everything about him. Mostly him.

"Don't leave me..."

"Shh..." he shushes him raising a finger to his lips. His finger barely touching Mark's lips.

"Promise me you will move on and find someone" Mark's eyes went wide as tears started to stream down his face. He shakes his head vigorously.

"No. Your my wife. I can't just find someone who would replace you. I love you and only you" Mark cries and his wife smiles.

'How can he smile like that when he's about to die?' Mark's thought but then again his wife is the strongest and bravest person he has ever known in his life.

'I love him and he knows that. He knows that but why did he tell me to move on and forget about him? It will not happen! He will be forever in my heart and soul' Mark's thought and looked at his wife.

"Take care of Jisung and Chenle" said his wife and Mark nodded and cling onto his hand. He breathes out and looks at Mark.

"I love you, Minhyungie. Don't forget that" His voice was becoming more quieter as he spoke.

"Don't leave us alone" Mark whimpered, he caress his cheek and stares into his eyes.

"I won't. I will watch you from above. I will always be by your side all the time" he says and motions for Mark to move closer. He obeyed and he leans in and kisses him. Using all his strength to the kiss. Mark kisses him back and hold his face in his shaking hands as his hand still on Mark's cheek. The kiss was sweet and passionate and soon it was becoming slower as he breathe out the last words that left his mouth before he left...

"I love you..." and his hand falls slowly down his chest and his body went limp.

Mark stared at him and tears were streaming down his face. He held onto his hand as his eyes came lifeless. He was staring at the ceiling. Mark sob and raised his shaky hand over his eyes and closes his eyes and sighed.

"I love you too" Mark choked and cried until the doctor came and told him to go outside.

~~~

Mark was meets by his parents, Jaehyun, Taeyong with their children and also Jaemin (his wife's twin brother) sitting on the bench.

Their children were sitting on Mark's mother and Taeyong's lap and as soon as they saw their father walk out of the room they cling themselves onto him.

Mark hugged them both with each arm and cried in silence.

"Where's eomma?" Chenle asked, pulling away from the hug.

Jisung looked at him and smiled weakly, his brown eyes that reminded Mark of his wife, looked at him sad and lonely.

Mark's heart broke to see their sons like this. Chenle wiped his father's tears with his tiny hand and looked at Mark, waiting patiently.

"He's watching us from above now" Mark said and give a small smile.

Chenle and Jisung nodded.

Mark swears they are like their mother.

Strong and brave.

They tried to hold back their tears and tried to look strong for everyone.

Mark smiles at the children he calls 'ours'.

~~~

As soon as they go home, even though Mark refuses to leave but his twin brother, Lucas insists that he must go home.

Mark hasn't slept for days, bags under his eyes. And his eyes were red from crying.

Mark's mother drove them back home.

He didn't want to go in because he would be engulf by the sight of him everywhere around the house. Looking at the twins was enough to make Mark cry. One look at them and he saw him in them.

~~~

Chenle quickly ran up the stairs with Jisung following behind when they entered the house.

The house seemed cold without him. It felt quiet without his cheery voice booming in the place.

Suddenly, two cats emerged out of the kitchen and Mark crouched down, both heads with both hands before sighing. Bongsik his hand as he played with Nal's ears.

"Do you think he's fine up there?" He asked the cats. As if understanding it, Nal gave a soft 'meow' before running of to who-knows-where. Bongsik looked at him with big eyes and nodded slightly before leaving.

Suddenly, he heard a crash from upstairs in the twins' room which he believed was where the sound came and he quickly dashed off with Ten trailing behind.

~~~~

"Eomma!"

He hear Chenle's voice followed by Jisung's.

Mark opened the door and saw his two children whimpering and hugging each other. A lamp was laying on the floor broken. He frowned and run up to his children on the floor and hugged them both closer to him.

Chenle and Jisung cling onto him tight as they sobbed on his shoulders. Ten, was watching them with tears in his eyes. Mark closes his eyes and showered kisses on their heads before pulling away slightly.

"Listen to Appa" Mark demand, when he know they were listening, he started.

"Eomma will be disappointed to see you crying—" he paused, Chenle looked at him and he continued.

"He wants you to be brave and strong. He doesn't want to see you cry because he's not here anymore—" Mark stopped again, because Jisung looked at  him and shot him a look.

"He's still here, Jisung-ah. Appa knows you and Chenle love Eomma and Appa also loves him. Eomma wants, Appa to tells you that he loves you and he wants you to know that he will never leave you alone. Understand? " Mark said, Chenle nodded while Jisung stared at him with his brown eyes. Tears were streaming down his face and crossed his arms around his chest like his mommy used to.

"But appa, eomma is not here anymore" Jisung says quietly.

Mark shook his head and pulled him on his lap. Chenle watches them and hold Jisung's hand.

"Eomma is not here, yes that's true. But eomma is in here-" Mark pointed to his chest where his heart was beating.

Jisung looked at his father and nodded before leaning his head on his shoulder.

"Eomma will never leave us alone. He loves us so much. Don't forget that he's always here. Even if we can't see him" Mark sighed.

Chenle 's eyes lit up as he stood up and grabbed something under their bed.

"Whats that?" Mark pointed to the blue book he was holding.

Jisung looked at the book and stretched his hand for the book. Chenle gave him the book and sat beside Mark.

"Its a book eomma gave us when we were still in the hospital" Chenle opened the book and looked at the photos when Jeno and Mark were babies until they dated, when Jeno and Mark were in high school graduates.

'Our graduation day. Where do we start a new way of our life'

Mark smiled, that his wife wrote a letter on each page. Then Chenle flip another page there's is a picture of Mark and Jeno on their first day at college. Then another photos that also had letters on its page.

 

'You're my happiness

 

'I'm so lucky to have you'

 

'Your laugh is the most beautiful thing in this world'

 

'Even though sometimes you are annoying, but you always succeed in making me laugh because of the ridiculous behavior you always do'

 

'There is no perfect love. But there is eternal love'

 

Then the picture of him kneeling on one knee in front of the crowd. Jeno's hand was in his mouth while Mark held the velvet box with a nervous expression on his face.

Mark is the happiest man when he says the three letters.

Jisung flip another page and their wedding photos were came into view. Mark's arm wrapped around Jeno's waist as he smiled towards the camera.

One more with their close friends at the reception.

Another photo is a group photo. Their friends and family surround the new bride with a big smile on their faces.

Then another flip from Mark, came when Jeno announced that they were expecting to the twins being born, they had the same birthday as Jeno. April 23. To the twins first crawl, first walk, first word, till they reached one and their first day of kindergarten to being honored as the top students.

Mark smiled and came a few more pictures of Jeno and the twins with a few pictures of them both. Some were from their friends and family with Chenle and Jisung.

And then a photo of Mark and Jeno, when they get the news that hurts and destroys their world. Where at that time his wife was diagnosed to suffer from advanced stage leukemia.

Under the photo is an envelope. Mark took the envelope and opened it and then read the letter which turned out to contain the sentence Jeno told Mark, when they returned from the hospital.

'Dear Mark hyung...

I thank God for bringing you to my life.

I know I have many flaws and imperfections. But I am grateful you are present in my life and accept all my shortcomings and imperfections.

I thank you for giving color to my life. And you have also given me a true meaning of love.

Mark hyung...

Do you believe in God's destiny?

God's destiny is what brings us together.

God's destiny also unites us.

And only God's destiny will separate us.

Maybe we cannot unite in this life. But, maybe in the next life we ​​will be able to reunite.

Hyung remember that I love you so much. Forever.

And hyung, please stop crying. I don't want you to cry because of my departure. Because I can be finally happy hyung. I am happy because I no longer feel the pain of chemo. I don't have to hold my pain anymore in front of the children. I am happy because all the pain is now gone.

Hyung, I beg you... Stop crying. I want you to be brave and strong. For me, Chenle and Jisung.

I love you Mark hyung. Thanks for everything.

Your beloved wife

Jeno'

~~~

Mark cried reading the letter. He cried because now his wife was no longer by his side. But he believes his wife is now happy. Because it's true that his wife no longer feels pain. And he also believed that in the next life they would reunite.

Then Mark opens the next page but the page is empty. Likewise with the following pages which are also empty.

Until finally on the last page there is a blue envelope.

Mark knew the envelope must contain a letter from his wife. Because blue is his wife's favorite color and also himself.

Mark began to read the letter aloud.

'Dear Jisung and Chenle.

Eomma hopes you like the photos displayed by Eomma on this album. It took a while for me to finish it.

I guessed you must be wondering why the rest of the page is blank, right?

Well, eomma wants you to fill it with more memories and experiences  I wants you to fill it in and then tells me about what happened behind the photos.

Eomma may not be here anymore, but Eomma will always be in your heart and memory.

Eomma will look after you from above.

There's a cd in one of the drawers in eomma and appa's room. I want you to find it and when you find it. I want you to play it and watched it with appa. You will see what I had stored for you.

I love you so much Chenle and Jisung. Tell appa I love him too.

Eomma is so proud to have you both in this world. You made me the happiest man alive.

I love you. And will be forever in your heart and mind.

 

Yours truly Jeno'

 ~~~

When Mark finished reading the letter, Jisung and Chenle fell asleep in their father's arms.

Tears were silently streaming down Mark's face as he heaved a sight to stop himself from crying.

Ten stood beside his son and grabbed a hold of Chenle while Mark took Jisung and laid them both on their beds. Then give them a kiss.

Mark the light and left the room with the door slightly craked open.

Ten instantly engulf Mark in a hug and he hugged back sobbing in his arms. While he caress his hair.

 

~~~~

 

"I will forever love you, Jeno" Mark finished reading and looking atthe album Jeno gave 10 years ago.

10 years have past since he died from blood cancer. Since the last time he saw him. Marj was standing in front of his gravestones as he looked at the carving engrave.

Lee Je No

Born in April 23, 1990.

Died in August 2 2022.

A loving friend, mother and wife.

 

Mark looked at it for a few minutes before he felt a hand on his shoulder.

Looking behind his shoulder, he saw their son with a sad smile on his face.

Mark smiled at the black-eyed boy and nodded before glancing and arranging the flowers neatly in front of the gravestone. His hand lingered for a bit before letting it slide and taking his son's hand in his, clutching the album with the other as he led his father to the car where Jisung was patiently waiting and soon they drove away. As Mark whispered the words he had said 10 years ago...

 

"Don't leave me..."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'm so sorry if my english so :(