Another year passes. Hyukjae learns to stop reacting when people make assumptions about him and Donghae, and Donghae does his best not to retaliate to underhand comments. Hyukjae gets his first girlfriend too, and although it only lasts a week (six days to be exact – Donghae is counting) it does a lot to dispel the rumours. They have their school work and soccer and their friends, and they have tacos and video games and each other, and it’s a joy to be alive until-

Until Donghae finds just how painful life can be. For a long while he doesn’t think about school, or tacos, or video games, or even Hyukjae.

Life goes on, as it always does, but Hyukjae knows that Donghae’s first Christmas without his dad is going to be tough. Donghae starts to get quieter and more despondent as Christmas gets nearer, until about a week before he says he’s busy and stops replying to Hyukjae’s messages. Hyukjae knows he’s not busy. He knows he’s sitting in his room holding that framed picture of himself and his father. But this time there’s nothing Hyukjae can do to fix things so he tells himself Donghae just wants some space and will be back to normal soon enough.

It’s Hyukjae’s mother who suggests they visit on Christmas Eve. She ignores Hyukjae’s weak protests and hands him a covered casserole dish which he holds nervously on his lap in the car. They stop at the shops on the way, squeezing through the happy throngs of shoppers. Hyukjae’s mom tells him to find something for Donghae but Hyukjae’s mind is as empty as his shopping basket. He wanders through the festive displays of trees and lights and fake snow (as if there wasn’t enough real snow outside) and it feels wrong that carols are still playing, that children are shrieking in delight and gifts are being given when Donghae is at home and Hyukjae hasn’t tried to call since Tuesday.

There are no decorations up at Donghae’s house.

His mother answers the door, smiling brightly and welcoming them in despite the weariness around her eyes. The two moms sit together in the living room drinking tea and talking quietly while Hyukjae stands in the hallway clutching a plastic bag of snacks and feeling useless.

Donghae is still in his room and he is refusing to see or speak to anyone, and Hyukjae is afraid. After the funeral, Donghae’s gr