Taemin boiled in his chair as he watched you smile and laugh with other men during conversation. It made him feel small and some small part of him felt ignored whenever you did that. He didn’t know how to politely ask you to never talk, smile, laugh or touch other men that weren’t him without sounding insane. But with all of his being he wanted nothing more than to blurt those words out to you as you grasped Kai’s shoulder and laughed at his stupid jokes.

You were buckled over as you tried to catch your breath and your face was tinted pink from the laughter and lack of oxygen. Was his joke really that funny?

Taemin shook his head and turned away from the sight of the two of you and decided to move on to something else. As long as you were enjoying the conversation with Kai he was just going to stand there fuming and pouty like a child and he had plenty of other things that he’d rather be doing. He found several other Exo members standing around in a nearby waiting room and took an empty seat.

He knew that your job as a cordi for the company meant that you had to be up close and personal with other groups. And that you were going to make tons of friends with guys and girls with your job, but that didn’t mean that as your boyfriend he couldn’t secretly hate it a little.

He already didn’t want to be here, getting prepared for the comeback stages for his recent album, when he was overworked, exhausted and hungry. But seeing you so close to Kai was really just the icing on the cake for him.

Your relationship just like any other relationship in this business was kept tightly under wraps, and no not even Kai knew that is best friend was dating the woman that he was so adamantly flirting with. But there was nothing that he could do about it. No one could know no matter how many times a day he wished that he could just end it all and “accidentally” post a photo of the two of you together and “accidentally” declare you as his partner.

He looked down at the tiny dot that he had tattooed over his ring finger as a symbol of your relationship and tried to remind himself of why he had to keep quiet. He knew that he couldn’t get away with wearing a couple ring, and that anything that he was seen wearing often would be noted by his sasaengs.  But the tiny dot that was tattooed just a few shades darker than his skin tone easily passed as a freckle. And so far no one had even mentioned it.

Not even you knew about the permanent ink that he recently had etched into his skin, and he was okay with that. The tattoo wasn’t meant for you anyways. It was his own way of having you permanently attached to his body, even if it was something as small and unknown as what it was. It was his own little childish secret and he loved playing the “I know something you don’t know” game with you. In fact it was his greatest secret. It was no small feat that someone like you had walked into his life and made him feel like he deserved every ounce of happiness in the world. It was no ordinary task that someone had managed to make him a complete love struck fool. And yet he was more than happy to be yours.

He sighed and let his head fall back against the chair as he looked up and into the glow of the lights just above him. The fact that something as small as you laughing at one of Kai’s jokes making him jealous made Taemin even angrier at the whole stupid thing.

In that moment he had really hated being an idol.  

He would never be able to have a normal relationship with you. You would always be stuck in his apartment or him in yours. He would always have to cover every inch of his flesh any time that the two of you were out together. He couldn’t hold your hand or protect you from erts who openly flirted with you. He couldn’t kiss you in the first snow, or feed you his packed lunches out by the river. He couldn’t post pictures and share his love for you like others could.

But the biggest issue he had with it all was that you would never know how much he would spoil you and show you off to the world like you deserved to be, if he had the chance.

He had day dreamed countless times of going shopping with you and spending money on anything that you even dared to look at. Taking you on trips abroad and taking cheesy couple photos wherever you went. Or even just simple things like taking you grocery shopping and making sure that the cart was full each time, just so he could say that he was taking care of you and feeding you well, at the very least.

The though alone made him smile like a fool.

“Yah, what are you so happy about?” Xiumin asked from across the room

Taemin lifted his head up slightly to peek at the person responsible for the loud intrusion on his thoughts and smiled at the familiar face

“I’m just thinking about what I want to do after I get done filming today…” he replied as if he were speaking of a faraway dream.

Xiumin just pursed his lips and nodded his head, “Should we go get drinks after this?” he asked Taemin

Taemin shook his head “No, no. I don’t want to do anything other than sleep” he said with a laugh in his voice

“Okay, just let me know if you change your mind” Xiumin offered one last time before he turned back to his conversation with s.

Taemin knew that he probably seemed like a total flake since he wasn’t spending any time with his friends lately. But he really couldn’t help but turn down any offer that he received. If he went to whatever his friends were doing he would only think of you the whole time, and every moment of free time that he had to spend with you was golden. He knew that your relationship was fragile with its current conditions and less than five hours of face to face contact a week. So, there was no way that he was going to push that any farther than it already was.

You had come back into the room with a smiling Kai following closely behind you staring straight at your . Taemin sat up in his seat quickly and raised his hand as if he was going to slap the smug smile straight off of his face but quickly rolled his eyes and willed his arm to drop back to his side. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to get rid of the images of him looking at you like that as close to gone as possible.

When he opened his eyes again he noticed that you were looking at him skeptically as if you wanted to say something to him. He looked back at you for a moment to acknowledge that you were watching him and then quickly looked away.

You quickly approached him and bent towards his face looking over his makeup for any smudges or corrections and then ran your fingers over his hair lightly fluffing it where it had gone flat from him resting his head against the back of the chair. You fixed whatever you could and then you looked at him as a whole with his outfit and jewelry.

He looked so goddamn y…. His tight jeans which displayed his taught muscles and his shirt combined with the jewelry that accented his look made him look dangerous and lethal. But that was the whole point.

“It’s perfect” you said giving him a small smile “Don’t lean your head back, okay?!” you politely commanded.

“Yes, I’m sorry” he apologized for messing up your hard work.

But really he messed up his hair every time just so he could eventually have you close again. His apology was bull and the smile on his face as he spoke rang louder than the words he had said. You slightly squinted an eye at him, catching onto his game and did the polite and less obvious thing and simply nodded your head at him.

You purposefully took a seat in an empty chair that was a few feet away from all of the boys in the room and pulled out your phone. It was moments like these when you weren’t doing anything that you could text Taemin to say the things that you couldn’t mutter out loud. You opened your messages and quickly sent him a flirty text.

You: You look so good today oppa, what will I do if someone steals you away from me?

Taemin quickly received the notification an