raina POV

I had a dream, a goal to become the best lawyer in the country my object was to be successful and happy however I wasn't planing on falling in love with him it wasn't supposed to be this way I wasn't this kind of girl however it did happen this way he made me lose sight of the most important goal in my life he made me forget who I was and I lost control of my life it was like I was under his spell a spell that I couldn't break...

It all started 3 months ago I was studying for my exam this was my last year in high school, and I was top of my class I had plenty of friends, and I was on track, the happiest and the best version of myself I was so proud of what I accomplished and how far I've come I picked my books, and I was heading for my classroom where I was supposed to passe my exam when I bumped into someone 
 

“ I'm so sorry I wasn't paying attention are you okay ?” i apologized while the guy i bumped into was kindly picking up my books

“don't worry about it's okay I wasn't paying attention too” he said ” you seem in a hurry though” he added while handing me my books

“yes in fact I have an exam right now and I don't want to be late “ I said while taking my books

“here you go and good luck on your exam “he said while I thanked him and headed to passe my exam

finally, I'm one step closer to my goal I thought to myself another exam I'm pretty sure I aced so now I can relax for a minute maybe catch a movie with some friends I was reaching for my phone to call my friend when I saw the guy I bumped into

“hey it's you again” I said to him

“oh hi how was the exam “

“ I think I did good actually and you ?”

“I think I got it, hey by the way I didn't catch your name “ he said

“Oh I'm raina and you ?”

“I'm kai “ he said while we shook hands.

At last, I'm home I took a shower changed my clothes and got ready to go out to dinner with my friends they picked me up at my home and went to dinner and to my surprise I saw kai there turns out we had the same friends but since i never got out that much i never met him, we had dinner then went to this bonfire party that we got invited to

“ so raina what are your plans for college “

“oh I'm planing on becoming a lawyer so hopeful I get accepted into Harvard “

“ A lawyer then ? Interesting “

“Yeah and you ?”

“ I'm thinking of creating my own business ".

“ Interesting “

We had a long conversation about the future and our plans we talked for hours and it felt like we knew each other for a long time I felt comfortable talking to him, and he was nice and smart I couldn't sleep that night I had never felt this way I've never talked with someone that long especially a boy I've always had one goal and I've always focused on reaching it, after that night we became friends me and kai, and we started hanging out more and more. Came the last day of school, and we were invited to this party on the beach I went with kai we danced and talked all night and came that feeling again the butterflies in my stomach this is new to me I've never felt this way toward a boy I was confused.

“ So I have something to tell you” kai said

“I've decided that I want to take a gap year and do some traveling”

“ What ? “ Those word stabbed me right through my heart what about me I thought was I imagining all this time was i the only one that has these feeling toward him all these questions that I had yet no answers.

“ I want to explore the world and get to know new culture I don't want to waste my time anymore I want to start living”

“ I'm happy for you then whatever you do as long as you are happy”I said on the verge of crying

This was the most painful thing to go through having feelings for someone and not being loved back it hurts like hell and I wish I was brave enough to tell him the way I felt about him i wish I could.

It's been a few days since kai told me about his plans, he wants to explore the world he said that means I won’t be able to see him I couldn't get out of my bed I was a prisoner in my own body I've never been in this situation I feel like i always distant myself from boys so that I won't be in this situation where I lose focus, see I've always had a plan for everything but not this kind of thing summer is almost over and I've been accepted by Harvard but I wasn't exited as I was before knowing that kai will be leaving plus it's been a month now since we last talked, so I decided to call him and invite him to do something 

I called but no one answered so I decided to drop by his house, I rang the doorbell and his mom answered

“ hi I'm looking for kai”

“ he's in his room come in “ she welcomed me and showed me kai's room I knocked

“ come in “ kai said so I entered

“ hey you where did you disappear it's been few weeks now “ he said while giving me a warm hug

I could see he was packing, so I said “ you're leaving soon I see ?”

“Tomorrow actually I'm going to Korea first “ he said.

He was exited he kept talking about which country he was visiting first what he was planing on doing there he was talking with passion and I didn't realize it but tears streamed down my face,

“ hey are you crying” he said

“ no it's just I won't be seeing you for a while and I'm going to miss you “ I said

“We can Skype and you can call me anytime “ he said while hugging me and I felt so safe in his arms and I wished that time would stop At that moment.

kai POV

it's been a few weeks now since I told raina that I wasn't staying here and that I was planing on traveling and I haven't seen here since I was packing for my trip since I will be leaving tomorrow when I heard a knock on my door room and it was her I was so happy to see her I didn't realize that I missed her this much we talked for a bit about my plans, and then she started crying she seemed troubled as mush as me actually because I will be lying if I said that I wasn't going to miss her the most and I wanted to kiss her so much, yet I didn't I wasn't ready and I didn't want to ruin our friendship I was afraid of rushing we spent some time together we talked for a while then I drove her home and on my way back I kept thinking what if rushing wasn't a bad idea after all what if there is no right thing to do in this situation but to tell her how i really feel about her I turned the car around that's it I've decided I'm going to confess to here I'm finally telling here how I feel about here how I couldn't stop thinking about her since the minute I bumped into here, since the first night we talked at the bonfire party she was perfect in my eyes and everything i ever wanted at this point I'm ready to stay here for her I want to see it till the end I was ready and I made my choice

raina POV

I was in my room I felt embarrassed, crying like a baby in front of kai was indeed embarrassing, but I was more in pain i wish I had told him how I feel about him i wish I was brave enough it was later that night my phone rang it was kai I picked up

“ hello raina it's beakhyun kai's brother you should come to the hospital kai has been in an accident “ beakhyun said with a shaking voice

I couldn't believe my ears kai was in an accident I didn't even reply I hang up the phone got dressed and got to the hospital as fast as I could the minute I arrived I saw beakhyun kai's brother in front of the hospital crying I looked at him I knew something bad had happened I felt it

“ please don't say it “ I said

“ he's gone raina kai is gone “

Those word stabbed me right in my heart he was gone, kai was gone, and I was too late, too late to say it... I'm lost without him he was my anchor and now he's left me alone... lost.