She was beautiful. 

She was so beautiful, both inside and out. 

She was near perfection, and Sooyoung was glad to even just have her in her life. 

Of course, over the years of their friendship, Sooyoung inevitably developed, what she would describe, a crush, on the girl, but everyone does, how could you not? Jiwoo radiated such a powerful, bright vibe and just seeing her smile made everyone feel warm inside. It was as if she was sent down to bring joy to everyone who knew her. And she did just that to Sooyoung. 

But Sooyoung would never admit it. She wouldn’t admit that her heart would beat rapidly whenever Jiwoo called her name. She would never admit that Jiwoo made her feel things all through her body when she looked in her eyes. She’d never admit that she feels the same way Jiwoo felt about her. 

It is her biggest regret. When Jiwoo gained the courage to tell Sooyoung how she loved her, Sooyoung panicked. She was scared. Scared of commitment, scared of being hurt. Scared of hurting Jiwoo. She never felt so strongly for one person before and it terrified her. So she rejected, but a bit too harshly, for Jiwoo broke down in tears, apologizing for making Sooyoung uncomfortable. 

It made Sooyoung feel like the scum of the earth, being the one who caused Jiwoo so much pain. After that night, although they remained friends, per Sooyoung’s request, it wasn’t quite like before. Sooyoung felt selfish for keeping Jiwoo close but not as close as they both wanted to be. It wasn’t fair to her. But Sooyoung couldn’t help it. She needed Jiwoo by her side even if she wouldn’t be with her. And now, she couldn’t. 

Jiwoo moved on. She found the love she’s been yearning for, the love she deserves, in a girl named Heejin. Heejin was sweet to her. She took care of her, made Jiwoo feel loved. And Sooyoung hated that. 

She hated how Heejin came into their lives with no flaws. She hated that she gave Jiwoo her whole attention. She hated that she also had the courage Jiwoo possessed. She hated that the only reason why she was in so much pain was due to her own fault. 

All she could do was watch Jiwoo with regretful eyes, longing for the love she will never receive.