Remains.

 

I woke up. I stared blankly at the ceiling. I'm still here? i sat up and found an empty room. It's just me and a single bed that i sat on. i stood up and opened the door and found and empty house. Nothing there. Even just a little table, or maybe mirror. i walked out toward kitchen. And found none. I walked to living room, and a photo frame of me and.. Klang! I turn over and found him.

 

"You're still here?" He said. I put the photo frame and rubbed the back of my neck.

"I'm sorry for bothering you. Is Sungmin hyung arrived there?" I asked.

"It almost 2 hours. They waited for you, they suspect something bad happened to you. It's better for you to go there now. The rest, leave it to me. I will bring it there." He said while packed the things that accidentally fell.

With no last words he left me. I need to move off.

I opened the door and found it's snowing. I tightened my sweater and walked out. For the first time, i hope that the snow would turns to water, because i need something to hide my tears.

 

*

 

A few years ago.

That kind of thing wouldn't change anything, and just him that can change me that time. I'm tough enough to not love anyone, to not care anyone. I don't need them by the way and they don't need me. I'm 17 and i'm young enough to do what i want to do. I can change the world with my own hands. That's me, Lee Hyukjae. I'm handsome, and rich, many girls came to me. I just played with them and then threw them. I just need to gave them my money and they would came to me, flirt with me, even having with me, they would do.

 

But one day, there's a disaster came to me. That i need to live in a dorm with someone that i don't know. I have complained to my father, but he objectsall my reason. He said, he needs to change me to be a better guy, because he needs to me to run his company. I smirked, so he just needsme as his workers? What the hell he thinks? He just came when he needs to0, never know that i need him since my mother passed out. The thing i said before i go abroad to my dorm "I hate you father". He just stared at me with his expressionless face.

 

When arrived there, i don't know that my roommate would be so annoying. He talks too much, always try to know what kind of person i am. Okay, he's handsome and kind of weird. Even when the first time i know him, he smiled so wide, and i felt even a cockroach can enter his mouth.

 

"Hello, are you hyukjae? I'm...." I don't remember his name and i don't care. I hate people who always try to know me better. I just need, who is he and who is me and enough.

 

I don't know that there's a time that all the dorm people must gathered at the hall, hate something like that, i just went myself to rooftop. No one would care anyway, there's me or not. I took my cigarette since no one would forbid me to smoke. I sighed the smoke and the grayed gas start to fill the air. I looked down and found myself crying. I wiped my tears and tried to laugh when suddenly i heard someone calling my name.

 

"Hyukjae-ssi!! Hyukjae-ssi, where are you?" I gasped when i recognized who's voice is. He searched me? I stood up and in a blink i found him runs toward me and hug me. I widened my eyes, still lost of what the hell is happening now.

 

"Where are you? I'm searching for you. I'm afraid you lost in anywhere because this a new place for you." He panted, looks like he ran when he search me. Silent. I can't say anything. He released the hug and pulled my hand. But i'm stay still on my spot.

"Where will you bring me? If it's hall, i don't want." I said, it sounds childish.

"I know." He said calmly.

I stared at him, he smiled gently, i neared cry because his smile, no one ever smiled to me like that. He moved closer to me and caressed my hair, since he was taller than me. (Well, just imagine that)

 

"You know, i know you don't know my name, i know you dislike people like me, i know you don't like crowd places, and i know you don't like seafood, and you like milk, and i know your birth date, 4th april 1986, and where you borned...." And he keeps talking. I stared with disbelief. How he knew that?

 

"Ho-How do you know?" I asked.

"Well,, i know everything about you. "He chuckled. I looked down, this time my heart felt so weak, if he still here and talk to me, i'm sure i'm gonna cry.

 

"You should go. You don't need to care about me. I'm okay" My voice cracked, i knew it sounds obviousthat i'm going to cry, but i don't want him to see. i heard him sighed.

 

"Until when you're going to hide ?" He asked. I sobbed silently. i close my eyes tightly and bit my lip hard. I can't take this. He hugsme, again, and buried my head in his chest.

 

"Even you're new, but it still hurts to see you cry. But know, cry as much you want. I'm going to be here." He said softly. The last thing that i know, i hug him back and cried all night.

 

After that time, me and him become closer. And i remember his name, it's Lee Donghae. We have same family's name, and for somewhat, it feels nice. He really a nice guy. I'm happy with it. And lately, i just realized, that i love him. And maybe because of my full confidence, i thought that he loves me too. And one day, i confessed to him. And for the first time, i know how stupid i am in love. He just lovesme as his brother, not more. I smiled, tried to not crying, but i felt i just got a message, maybe this is a karma for me, that i never appreciate  other's feeling.

 

i dropped, God is so fair.

Since that, i never talk to him, he tried to greet me, but i ignored him. I don't want to see him, it's not like i hate him, it just because i'm afraid i will cry in front of him, i just can bear his kindness. But for sure, this feeling never left my heart. It remains in my heart.

 

Remains in my heart. Everything.

 

End of Flashback

I woke up, and found myself sitting on a branch. I looked around, and realized that i was at Bus stop. Gazed at my watch, i sighed, i should be at Sungmin's place half an hour ago, now? i miss the bus. i must wait. suddenly i heard someone's calling my name.

 

"Hyukjae-ssi! You're still here? Sungmin called me a few minutes ago, and told me that you haven't arrived yet. What are you doing here? You miss the bus? But impossible, when you went out from house, the bus will come not long after it. i've delivered the things, they thought..." He keeps like that. I laughed and made him stopped talking. He looked at me confusedly. "Something is funny Hyukjae-ssi?" He asked.

 

I shook my head, "No. I'm sleeping here. I'm sorry." I answered.

"What? sleep? In this kind of weather? Oh, Gosh.. Here? How come?" He asked in disbelief.

i smiled, "Nothing happened, donghae-ssi. I'm just felt like to sleep, so i sleep." I paused and stared at his eyes, "And i've got a nice dream" He stared back at my eyes. I don't cry. For now.

 

"Are you really going to leave me now?" He asked, he knows what i mean. I smiled.

"Yes. How long i need to wait again?"

"2-3 minutes " He said without removing his eyes from me.

"Donghae-ssi, this is our farewell, maybe we can't see each other again, but i want you to know this.. It remains. Still remains. Everything Donghae-ssi" I said and the bus came. He looked surprised. I'm about toenter the bus when he suddenly call my name.

 

"If it still, so can i make it remains too? i felt it too, hyukjae-ssi." he said. i widened my eyes. "You should go in Hyukjae-ssi, they bus will departure soon." i nodded. i stepped in and sat on the corner of the silent bus and looked out to gave him last goodbye.

 

He mouthed something "wait me"

And the bus went off. I stared at the white snow, and tears fall from my eyes, "I'll wait"

 

*

 

Donghae breathed heavily, maybe because the cold weather, or maybe because the bus went off. He took something from his pocket and smiled, "I'm sorry Hyukjae-ssi, but i took this from you" he chukled and put back the photo of him and Hyukjae inside his pocked and walk away, left the bus stop.

 

The wind blows softly, like an angel touch. The white snow glowed because the sun. If it's not because of you, it wouldn't seem like that.

 

Not me, even you. Just us.

 

THE END.

 

A/N : Ummhh.. well, since i love angst, so, 80% from my story is always angst. I can't make a fluffy things. Sorry. But, comments still very very appreciated :D