I'm sitting in the library having a mini freak out because of the book I just found in my bag.

I'm not sure if I'm freaking out because he gave me his notebook without knowing my name or the fact that I' might not actually fail this test.

I can only assume that this notebook belongs to Subway Guy.

Well his name is Park Jimin so now I can put a name to a gorgeous face. Wait what?

I want to sit here and have a very compelling mental debate about how such an attractive man could possibly maybe in the slightest find me endearing at most. But, I only have so long to cram as much as I can so I can at least get a decent grade on this mid term so I can stay a float this semester. I push my thoughts aside the best I can.

I mean can I ever not have weird thoughts? No. No I cannot because I'm always thinking of weird things. Like how people communicate in a series of intricate sounding grunts. But that's not what I'm here to do now is it. No! I must study!

I take the next hour and a half cramming as much information into my brain as it will allow in that small amount of time. I do need to rewrite some of my notes so I grab some loose paper and start scribbling down what I need from Jimin's notes.

When did we learn this?!?!?! Was I sick during this lecture? Wait, is this even part of the class? I should take better notes...My lack of proper note taking in this class is probably why I'm nearly failing. Wait, what is this? Ahh!! I'm going to fail!

By the time I have to head to class I feel like there is smoke coming from my ears. The human brain shouldn't ever go through a whole course of lectures in two hours, it's just not possible.

I feel so burnt out. So much has happened today and usually I don't have a lot going on. This is new, so, so new.

I make it to the classroom and it's mostly empty but sprinkled with a few students who are doing some last minute cramming. I take a seat in the back corner of the room and put on my headphones while I wait for class to begin. I can feel my heart racing and my palms sweating just thinking about the midterm.

All this waiting is making me so anxious. Maybe I should peek at the notes a little more before it starts.

I pull out the book and instead of studying it I become a little more distracted with studying the elegant writing.

How can someone write so neatly? My hand writing is so awful I should be a doctor. I can barely read my handwriting. Jimin's hands are beautiful, so of course he would have beautiful handwriting.

Professor Seong came into the room and he doesn't look all that happy. I freeze as he slaps the stack of midterm papers onto his desk. I nearly tear off my ear pulling out my headphones.

Ouch.

He looks just as tired and done as I am.

“Alright class.” he says taking off his jacket.

Everyone in the room exchange glances nervously. I didn't believe it at first but I heard stories of this class being a harsh one and I could only imagine what he is going to say next. At this point my heart beat is ringing in my ears.

“I lost a bet last night so today's midterm is open notes.” He says grabbing the stack of papers.

The tension released from the room and everyone sighs, there are even some people letting out small cheers. I feel like there is a weight being lifted from my shoulders as well as I grab Jimin's notebook once more.

Finally the silver lining of today. I can at least get a decent grade with the notes Jimin took. I should thank Jimin later, maybe buy him a snack. Wait, what am I thinking? Just because he looks like a snack doesn't mean he deserves one. Psshhh come on.

I feel a little more at ease now that I feel like I am crushing this midterm with Jimin's notes. His notes are really organized.

More organized than my life. Which is saying something because my life is a mess. I'm a mess...a hot mess.

Walking out of class, I'm holding Jimin's notebook to my chest and smiling like an idiot before I realize.

Hey, knowing your luck you're going to run into something and possibly break something this time. So stop it. Stop that. Focus will you?

I got some time to kill before my next class so I go back to the cafeteria and sit down at a table. I spent a little too much in the library and it's too quiet to eat my snacks, so here I am. I'm scribbling down the last bit of notes to catch me up and eating a chocolate cream bun.

I love chocolate. It makes me feel so energized, and in charge. What? You know what, don't ask.

“Hey there, Sesame Teeth.” I hear a voice say as the chair next to me is taken.

I look over to my right and see Jimin smiling at me. I choke on my chocolate bun and I turn away patting my chest a bit.

How the hell is he so light on his feet?

“Are you always eating something?” He looks at me.

I shake my head vigorously in response.

We both know that's a damn lie...I'm always eating, or thinking about eating.

“Ahh here, drink this.” Jimin says holding out a drink to me.

I pat my chest softly before taking the drink. I look down at it and see it's milk.

Really? You're going to make me relive both horrors in one go? So cruel.

“Thank you.” I give him a little awkward head bow.

“You might wanna give my notes back before you drink that.” He chuckles.

“Oh right.” I say awkwardly setting the milk down carefully.

Don't want a repeat of earlier.

I grab the book which is open to the front page with his name on it handing it back to him with an awkward smile. He looks at me and chuckles and looking away from me as he laughs to himself. I blink a few times not knowing what he is laughing at.

“I guess you know how to make yourself memorable at least.” He says looking down at his notebook.

Right there at the bottom of the first page…

Is a big chocolate fingerprint.

“I'm so sorry!” I blurt grabbing a napkin trying to wipe away the chocolate.

I just made it worse, the smear is bigger...you ruined it Mi Sun...you ruined it.

“I just wanted to grab my notes and replace the milk I made you dropped before I head to class.” He says pointing at the little milk.

I let out a forced chuckle trying to seem like it's something funny but really I am mortified.

“I know you like strawberry but banana is my favorite.” He says sticking the little straw into the milk, in one smooth swipe.

Jimin gets up and walks away, notebook in hand. He puts his free hand up and waves to me without once looking back at me.

What a power play...That was smoother than my chocolate cream bun. God that was y. If there's any notes I should be taking from Jimin, it's on how to be so smooth.

Seriously. If someone spit milk on me I wouldn't have let them borrow my notes let alone talk to them so casually.

I drink the banana milk and play around on my phone for the next hour before my next class trying to get my mind off the horrid events of the day.

Damn this milk is delicious. Almost as delicious as…

Nope, too far.

My last class is pretty much a free period for study since the midterm isn't until the end of the week. I finally have some time to relax. I spend the hour listening to music and studying since there isn't anything better to do.

Except waste time on Instagram but that's a slippery slope. One minute you're laughing at a cat video then BAM! It's three hours later and your is sore.

I take a small walk around campus after class for some fresh air and to clear my head. I peek around to see if I can spot Jimin anywhere but find no sign of him. It doesn't bother me all that much considering how the events of the day played out.

Also, I still look like a feral raccoon.

I probably won't see much of him after today anyway. It's midterms and people are all over the place trying to study and get their grades together.

Part of me wants to be glad that I won't be seeing him around much after this week. The other part of me however, the lonely...oh so lonely...part of my wants to see him again.

I want to clear out all the horrors of today and so I stop by a convenience store on my way back to Jin's place.

“Mi Sun, are you serious?” Jin says as I walk through the door eating a sausage.

“About what?” I say between bites.

“I don't understand why you eat so much junk food when you could eat here.” He puts his hands on his hips.

“Because I would have to pay for it and this way it's cheaper.” I say walking up the stairs.

“I would say your aunt pays me enough but I've seen how much you eat.” Jin says following me up the stairs.

“It's expensive to eat out.” I turn to look at him.

“You really don't have to worry about that.” He sighs grabbing an envelope from the table holding it up.

“I'm trying to live cheaply.” I shrug.

“I took my last cut. She promised you'd be out by the end of midterms so I'm guessing she got something lined up.” Jin says handing me the envelope.

“Yes, more snack money. I used up the last of what I had on those snacks.” I say pulling out my wallet.

“By the look of the sausage you just ate, you bought it from the discount section.” Jin scrunches his nose and shakes his head.

I did buy it from the discount section…

“Here, take out the amount for the plates and the rest is for the savings.” I say shoving my wallet back in my bag.

Jin nods and starts counting through the small stack of bills.

“It's going to be a little boring without you around all the time.” Jin says as he pockets the money.

“Oh come on it's not like I won't ever come back.” I give him a small smile.

“Well since you don't have a bank account here I guess you'll have to come to me for your snack money.” He chuckles in response.

“Maybe I'll even come back for a meal or two.”

“Without me you'd never eat a decent meal.” He says.

“Can't argue with that. Speaking of a decent meal, isn't is almost dinner time?” I say peeking at the kitchen.

“You just ate.” He motions to my pocket of wrappers.

“But Jin. You just said I need better food and we both know your food is the best.” I say while puffing out my bottom lip.

“Don't you look at me like that.” He points at me.

I continue to pout and bat my eyes at him.

“Ahh, fine. Dinner rush is soon. Go wash up and meet me downstairs.” Jin says giving in.

I let out a small cheer as I skip to the bathroom to take a shower.

The hot water feels great, I should have washed up before I started to study but I didn't think about it, I was too busy watching Netflix. I really should manage my time better. I can manage my money well but my time? Not so much.

It's great what my aunt is doing and all but I want to know what it's like to live a life like how my mother did. Not marry into money, working for what she had in life. Someday I will repay my aunt for her kindness even though she won't need it nor probably accept it. It just doesn't feel right to accept what she has to give without working hard for it. I want to be strong and independent.

This is why I came back to Korea, to be like and live like my mother had…