“I’m so tired,” you groan, practically throwing your books onto the library table. You had spent the last few nights studying till it was late for the upcoming midterms, not to mention having to stay back after school to tutor Junmyeon and attend your club meetings. Needless to say, it had taken a toll on you.

“Then maybe we should cancel,” he suggests with a slight grin. Seeing your glare, he tacks on, “Because the tutor’s health is the most important!”

You roll your eyes. “Good try.”

“But seriously though,” he says, peering at you curiously. “You look terrible. Did you even get any sleep?”

Glaring, your hands automatically reach up to touch your eyebags which have grown deeper in colour over the course of the past few days. It’s just a tiny bit embarrassing to hear him describe you that way. You can’t hide the sarcasm in your voice. “I love hearing that I look terrible!”

“Now I know that you being sleepy makes you say whatever’s on your mind.” That curious look is showing again. He gives off the impression that he is going to use this information to his advantage. “But seriously though, if you’re too tired, we can just cancel. I’ll drop you home.”

His readiness to stop the tutoring there and then makes you remember about how he will most probably stop your tutoring sessions after the midterms. Before you know it, your sleepiness cannot keep your thoughts safely locked in your head, and you blurt out the first thing on your mind.

“Hey Junmyeon, if you were given the chance, would you stop the tutoring altogether? If your grades were good enough?”

He is taken aback by your question out of the blue. He takes a few moments to answer, though he keeps it vague. “We’ll see after I get my results.”

What do you mean?! You want to ask him. You don’t even have the mental capacity to ponder over what he is trying to imply, mostly due to how tired you are. Perhaps you could mull over it after a short nap. You hardly notice your eyelids fluttering close slowly.

“You know what?” Junmyeon declares, making you jump. “You’re too tired for this. This is like the fourth time you’ve spaced out. I’m taking you home.”

“I can handle it,” you argue. “It’s just that midterms are coming up. That’s all.”

And that’s all there will be to us, too.

Junmyeon clears his throat, and when you look up, he has both of your bags in his hands, with the table cleared from your belongings. When did that happen? You stare at him quizzically when he doesn’t say anything else.

“I packed everything when you were too busy spacing out for the tenth time. C’mon, let’s get home.”

After a few weak protests which fall on deaf ears, you allow yourself to be whisked away from the library into the confines of his warm car. Your eyes automatically fall shut when he revs the engine and starts driving. Your heart too automatically flutters when he tsks at you.

“You know you can just tell me when you’re tired, right? We don’t have to do this all the time.” He sounds amused. “Unless it’s because you can’t get enough of my dashing good looks?”

“No, I just can’t get enough of your modesty,” you mumble, eyes still closed. If only he knew how close to the truth he was.

He snorts. The car ride goes on as usual in silence and you are very thankful that he is letting you sleep. Although you may not act like it, you are grateful for the few minutes of rest in his car despite missing a potential two hours tutoring Junmyeon.

Just a few more days, you tell yourself. About a week to midterms, and you can finally get the rest you deserve. Which also means that it’s a week to no more Junmyeon and back to how it all was. You try not to beat yourself too much over it because exams are already so soon and you can’t afford to get distracted like this.

It feels like you’ve only just closed your eyes, but Junmyeon is already nudging you awake. You groan, not wanting to get out of his warm car and your eyelids feel very heavy.

“Jaera,” he calls out gently. “We’re here.”

You feel his hand on your shoulder, and it sends a jolt of warmth throughout your body. You feel a lot more awake now, and your eyes flutter open to a blurry view of Junmyeon’s amused expression. You frown at him, which only makes him stifle a laugh.

“Thanks for bringing me home,” you say sleepily, reaching for your bag. “See you tomorrow.”

“Wait!” He stops you from exiting the car and rummages for something in his bag. “Here, this is for you.”

You your head at the item he presents you with. It is a bottle of chicken essence, a sort of traditional Asian herbal drink that is said to give the drinker strength and focus. You usually only drink these during final term examinations as they tend to be quite pricey. So why would he be giving something so expensive to you?

You make a noise of surprise, looking at him, to the bottle, and back to him. “It’s fine, you don’t have to give that to me.”

“I insist,” he shakes his head. “You’ve been looking so tired the past few days. It’s the least I could do, especially since I’m partially the cause of your tiredness.”

You push the bottle away. “I can’t accept that, it’s too expensive.”

“Really, it’s fine. I’ve got a box full of them at home anyway. It would go to waste since I don’t really drink this kind of stuff.”

Eyeing him for a moment, you sigh before taking the bottle from him. “Fine. Thank you.”

He smirks and it reminds you of his ‘old ways’, before you got to know him. Unconsciously, your lips turn upwards into a somewhat dreamy smile, unable to hide your admiration for how handsome he looks with that smirk of his.

“Don’t stress out so much over midterms. It’s just another exam,” he tells you nonchalantly. When you snort, he huffs. “I mean it! You’ll get white hair by the time you turn twenty.”

“What if that’s the look I’m going for?” you shoot back. You know that he is right, but your pride won’t make you back down. Suddenly, you let out a huge yawn. You hate that he’s right.

He scoffs. “Just make sure you’re awake for our following tutoring sessions. Or should we call those off too?”

“See you tomorrow.”

You only smile to yourself as you walk away when you hear him groaning. That is, before you actually swallow your pride, follow his advice and collapse onto the couch for a nap. He would never have to know.

-

You are flipping through your book one final time before the teacher announces for everyone to enter the examination hall. Everyone around you is doing something of the sort, and there is a sort of tension all around. Weirdly enough, you don’t see Junmyeon anywhere even though the exam is going to begin very soon.

“Jaera.”

Speak of the devil. Junmyeon saunters over with an annoying indifference, as opposed to your hardly concealed state of panic. It annoys you how he is still so casual while you had to go through the trouble of avoiding him after the last tutoring session in order to focus properly.

“Chill, you can do it. You’re Park Jaera, aren’t you?” he says as he fishes two bottles of chicken essence out of his bag. “Here. Bottoms up.”

You look at him awkwardly. “I couldn’t possibly-”

He his head at you, as if to say ‘Are we really doing this again?’

Clinking your bottle with his, you down it all in one shot after thanking him for the expensive drink. When you look around, your peers don’t seem to be particularly interested in your friendly exchange. Most of them seem to be used to how close the two of you have become, not to mention currently having a lot of last minute revision to do.

“Oh yeah. My mum wants to know when you can come over for dinner. She’s already been expecting you for quite a while, wanting to thank you for helping me and all that. It could be a celebration of our midterms too.”

You frown, not knowing how your heart would react to having dinner with his parents when it was just a stupid, hopeless crush. “I think it’s only right if she thanks me after we get our results back. We can’t celebrate anything before we know our grades!”

“Seriously? Why not right after our last paper?”

You let out a small smile. “Are you that confident?”

“Of course. I’m Kim Junmyeon.”

He grins at your show of eye-rolling. You nod, agreeing to dinner after the last paper seeing as he’s not backing down any time soon.

Suddenly, there is a flurry of teachers ushering all of you inside the hall and a lot of hurried movements by the students. You rush to shove your book into your bag and retrieve your stationery with a pounding heart. When you look back, Junmyeon is already nowhere to be seen.

Trying to calm yourself down, you shut your eyes after sliding into your seat in the large examination hall. You say a little prayer to yourself and hope that Junmyeon’s chicken essence will do its wonders. A part of you hopes that Junmyeon does well too; you know he has worked harder than before and you will be proud of him no matter what the outcome would be.

You turn to face the back of the hall where Seungwan is at to give her a thumbs-up because you know that she is feeling nervous too. She cracks a small smile before doing the same. Somehow, the nervous energy around the hall suffocates you and it makes you feel like burying your head in your arms.

Someone knocks on your table to get your attention, and you look up to see a familiar face. Kim Junmyeon sends you a reassuring smile and two words that manage to make you feel better. “Good luck.”

Before you can wish him the same, a teacher comes by to usher him into his seat. Only a tiny squeak of “You too!” is able to leave your lips, but the upturn of his lips assures you that he has heard it.

Exam booklets start to get passed out to all of you, and that is when you let all other thoughts fly out the window.

It’s showt