She pops a cherry into and crushes it under her teeth. Her tongue tingles as the sour taste takes over and relishes at the sweet sensation. There's a slight bitter after taste though, she has always found it so addicting—the cyanide.

"Stop eating the pits," Yewon tells her, "it's not good for you."

"A little poison won't kill me," Eunbi mutters.

She laughs and repeats the phrase, putting another little red cherry between her lips. Her best friend sighs and puts down book she was reading. She plucks out the cherry between her friend's lips and throws it into the trash can next to her. Eunbi glares and Yewon doesn't even spare her a single glance; instead, she picks up her book and goes back to reading.

"With the amount you're eating," Yewon chides, "you might as well stab your liver."

"Gladly" Eunbi scoffs and proceeds to reach for a pair of scissors.

Heavily sighing, Yewon stops reading and promptly slams her book down on Eunbi's hands. The latter winces and cradles her hands against her stomach, curling up into a ball. She looks upwards towards the plain ceiling and curses silently.

"Heck Yewon, that hurt."

"Stabbing your own liver would hurt more," her friend replies, "but anyway, stop hiding in my apartment already, you're going to have deal with it eventually."

"I told you, I can't," Eunbi groans.

Yewon picks up her book once more and slides her fingers between the pages to find her place again, "just like you can't stop eating cherries?"

"Cherries and love have a lot it common, Yewon," Eunbi says and sits up on the bed, sliding her feet into her slippers.

"You need to talk to her, Eunbi."

She stands up and mutters, "I know."

"You always leave when we start talking about her, it's been two weeks already," the girl points out as she flips to the next page of her book.

"How observant," Eunbi responds as she heads towards the door.

She quickly slips out of her slippers and into her shoes, flicking another cherry into on her way out. Yewon doesn't even bother moving from her seat to stop her, she knows it's no use because it always ends up the same way. She'll always find a way to weasel her way out of Yewon's grasp and slip away. There's really no stopping that girl from anything she wants unless it's Sojung—Eunbi has only ever listened to Sojung after all these years.

It has always been Sojung.

"I thought you said you couldn't leave," she yells at her best friend.

"And I thought you wanted me to leave," Eunbi retorts right before she shuts the door behind her and whispers, "besides, life is full of contradictions."

Not waiting for Yewon's response, Eunbi starts to walk away from the apartment and tries to think about anything and everything except for her. But even with that in mind, she still gets stuck on the idea of how much she hates her and how much she loves her. Like a pair of cherries, those feelings get stuck together inside of Eunbi whenever she thought of her. It makes her confused and hurt, but she's addicted to it at the same time. She craves for more of it, she wants that love to fill her up even if it kills her.

"Love is poison," she says to herself and begins to fasten her pace, somehow hoping that it would magically make her thoughts go away.

And when those thoughts don't disappear for awhile, she runs. Eunbi doesn't know where to, but she runs. To get away from it all, to get away from her and herself, she runs.

It's dark when she's out of breath and stops in front of a liquor store. She doesn't know what came over her, but a few minutes later, she comes out with an plastic bag full of beer in her right hand and a pack of cigarettes and a lighter in her left. With her hands full, she has trouble fishing and a cigarette out of the box. She's honestly never smoked before and didn't think she ever would. But that doesn't matter now, setting down her beer on the floor, she holds the cigarette to her lips with one hand and lights it with the other. She the smoke in and tries to let it settle in, but she gags. Coughing at the smell, she throws the roll of tobacco down and snuffs the burning tip with her foot.

"What am I even doing?" Eunbi hisses and picks up the bag of beer, throwing the opened pack of cigarettes and lighter into it.

She slings the plastic bag over her shoulder and starts walking to who knows where. Along the way to nowhere, she ruffles her hair with her free hand in frustration. Sojung's on her mind again and Eunbi still doesn't know how to get her out. Maybe Yewon was right, maybe she did need to talk to Sojung; but then again, when will Eunbi ever listen to her?

"Yeah, right," Eunbi snarls.

Out of spite, she texts a photo of her beer and cigarettes to Yewon, knowing of her probable deep disapproval. It doesn't take long before she feels her phone vibrate several times before she decides to check her messages. Unlocking her phone, she notices that it's almost eleven and five messages from her friend:

|Yewon🐹| [10:45] WTF EUNBI

|Yewon🐹| [10:45] WHERE ARE YOU, I'm taking you home

|Yewon🐹| [10:45] what's wrong with you

|Yewon🐹| [10:51] ducking respond

|Yewon🐹| [10:58] if you don't respond, I'm kicking you out

K |Eunb_tch| [10:59|

Eunbi turns off her phone screen and tucks it into her back pocket before she continues to walk. She feels it vibrate a few times and decides to ignore it. In the next few minutes, it begins to vibrate continuously and she gets annoyed so she pulls her phone back out again. She clicks the display back on feels even more disturbed when she sees who's calling. She wants to ignore it but she can't, so she picks up.

She doesn't say anything for a solid few seconds, but she manages the wheeze out a simple, "hey."

“Don't ‘hey’ me,” the girl on the other end shouts harshly, almost angrily even, “tell me where the hell you are.”

Eunbi swallows a pocket of air down before she answers, “I actually really don't know where I am.”

“Turn on your location tag and send the link to me,” the older girl commands, “don't even think about moving an inch from there until I get to you.”

Eunbi stays where she is and listens to her, sending her the information she asked for and barely managing to squeak an, “okay, Sojung.”

When Eunbi hears the notification sound go off from the other end of the call, Sojung hangs up. The younger girl is left standing there with her heart beating fast. She doesn't feel annoyed at first but then a surge of anger swells up at the top of her head. At the sound of Sojung’s voice she melts and she despises that. She hates the feeling of not being under control, the helplessness of it all. Yet, Eunbi doesn’t leave, she only clenches her teeth and squeezes her fists together; she waits for Sojung.

And so as time passes by, the bag in Eunbi's hand starts to feel heavy. Uneasily, she shifts her weight from one foot to the other every few minutes.

Watching numerous cars pass by, she begins to feel irked. She doesn't like the fact that she seems to be the only that's not moving forward. The feeling of being left behind makes her anxious. She wants to turn away, but what else is there to look at? The pollution in the sky? She lets out a deep breath and turns back into her thoughts. And as expected, she doesn't stay too long there though. Because soon enough, there's a black car that comes to an abrupt halt in front of her. The window is slowly pulled down and it only takes Eunbi a mere glance to recognize that face.

"Sojung."

The sound of a click and a shift of locks ring in the air. Eunbi is frozen still and doesn't move, she's nervous because the older girl hasn't even said a word to her since she's arrived. She's scared because Sojung isn't yelling at her. It's not until the cars behind them start honking that the taller girl says anything.

"Get in," Sojung demands with anger fused into her words.

Eunbi shivers at the sound of her voice, it's so oddly sharp and clear in the midst of the symphony of traffic. Ironically, it causes a cacophony inside of her head—where so many thoughts and voices were clashing against each other. With that distracting her, she's barely able to slip into the front seat beside Sojung before the older girl starts glaring at her. She motions at Eunbi to hand over her bag and the younger girl compiles. Sojung looks into it and sighs, she carefully turns to place it on the floor of the back seats.

"I don't smoke, you know," Eunbi tries to explain, "I only tried it once and the beer isn't even open."

"I know Eunbi," Sojung tells her, in a surprisingly soft voice, "I know."

An awkward silence follows and the older girl starts to drive. Her eyes are focused on the road, smoothly driving them through the ruckus of horns blowing through the night.

"Why aren't you mad?" Eunbi couldn't help but ask.

"I am," Sojung answers as they come to a stop in front of a glowering red light, "but I'm more disappointed."

"Oh."

Sojung steps on the gas pedal after the light switches green and stops talking again. Eunbi doesn't bother trying to salvage the conversation and stares out the window. They don't talk for the rest of the ride.

It takes a good amount of time until they reach her old neighborhood. Eunbi remembers everything she doesn't want to remember; the empty 'sorry's and forced smiles; their last argument; their breakup. She clutches her chest and wishes that she had a pair of scissors. It'd be nice if she could stab her own liver right then and there, or better yet, stab her heart.

The car stops and the engine switches off. Sojung makes a few texts after she steps out of the car and Eunbi reaches for the plastic bag behind their seats. When both of them are done, they head into the house. And then there they are, just as they were before the younger girl stormed out of the house, sitting on the couch and avoiding each other. Eunbi opens a can of beer and takes a huge gulp. It's slightly bitter but it's warm. She sinks deeper into the couch, she's always been fond of this spot. It's where they had their first kiss.

"Pick your poison," Eunbi says to Sojung, offering the plastic bag to her while avoiding looking at her at the same time.

She's surprised when Sojung doesn't take the bag but touches her arm instead. The taller girl hovers over her and cups her cheeks. Her face is too close, she can feel her breath on her nose. There's something especially enticing about those lips tonight too, Eunbi wonders if it's because she hasn't kissed them in awhile.

"Can I kiss you?" Sojung whispers, staring into her heart.

She hesitates; she feels her heart waver.

"Go ahead."

The gap closes. She takes her breath away slowly and softly, it’s a sweet kind of poison.

"You," Eunbi breathes, "taste like cherries."

Before the other girl can reply, she pulls her down and hugs her. She snuggles into her arms, she missed her.

"Can we stay like this?" she murmurs.

"For a bit," Sojung gently runs her fingers through her hair and patting her back, "but we need to talk, okay?"

"Okay."

"It was stupid you know," Sojung says as she continues caressing the girl snuggled next to her, "what we were fighting over."

Eunbi frowns and shakes her head, "it wasn't stupid, I was... j-jealous."

"You're right," she chuckles, "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too," the younger girl admits and tucks her head under the rook of Sojung's neck, "I missed you."

"I did too, don't do anything this reckless again," the taller girl lightly scolds.

"I won't."

Sojung pauses and Eunbi looks up at her, she senses a sort of thickness in the air. She smiles and leans down to kiss her again. Softly, she smothers her with love and warmth. Her hand slips under her shirt and caresses her waist. Eunbi shivers and clutches Sojung's shirt, asking her for more until they both run out of breath.

"You also taste like cherries," Sojung pants.

Eunbi pulls her back on top of her, "can we talk about our fight tomorrow?"

Sojung leans back down and whispers something into her ear and Eunbi feels like she's intoxicated. She's bitten too hard into love and she feels likes she's dying.

fin