Soft waves and occasional humming of the crickets could be heard along the seashore of a now deserted beach. Warm yellow lights coming from the nearby hotel and establishments softly illuminating the sand, as a girl carefully navigated her way around the beach. It's already way past midnight and she was still wide awake which made her decide to go on a night walk around the beach. I should have not drunk too much coffee a while ago, she thought with a sigh as she pushed strands of her hair away from her face as the gentle wind blew them.

Upon walking further, she saw a guy sitting alone on the sand and looking blankly at the pitch-black waters. The shadows across his face made him less recognizable but to her, he looks so awfully familiar and distant at the same time. Her stare lingered for a moment before she figured that it was better for her to walk away. As she was about to take a step, the stranger's head turned toward her direction. His pair of eyes met her wide ones as everything came back to her with a blow. Emotions flooded through her even before she could stop them.

Anger. Pain. Sadness. Longing. Hate.

His weak smile brought her back to her senses. There was something different about him aside from his new haircut and more matured features. It's his eyes... she noticed as her gaze fell back to his dull eyes. They have changed a lot and not in a good way. They used to be full of life and never looked dead like they do now. She walked toward his direction but kept her distance as she stood beside his crouched form.

"Hana-ssi." He greeted as his smile grew wider.

Hana-ssi? The sudden formality made her eyebrows twitched before she greeted him back quite sarcastically. "Taemin-ssi."

He chuckled lightly at her response. "What are you doing here this late?"

"Well... I can ask you the same thing." She said which only made him look at her in silence. Knowing she'll never get a response, she decided to simply answer his previous question. "I can't sleep. Too much coffee."

"Oh... I see." He nodded.

They stayed there as they looked around awkwardly, not really knowing what to say or do next. Taemin cleared his throat and patted the fine sand beside him. Hana stared at him with clear confusion written on her face. She completely understood that he wanted to ask her to sit with him but why?

"I mean..." He stammered as he formulated his words. "That is if you want to... I mean, it's alright if you won't. I'm just saying that..."

"Yeah, sure. Why not?" She saved him the trouble of embarrassing himself more. The idea was not that incredulous for her to reject although she honestly admits that it is not very ideal. "I am still not sleepy anyway and there is nothing for me to do." She shrugged as she said the words which were most likely just excuses to convince herself that it was alright to stay for a bit more.

He watched her as she sat down beside him and crossed her legs. There was silence between them as they stared at the barely visible waves. It was uncomfortable for them both especially when Hana started to shift around and play with the hem of her dress.

"So... you're here for a vacation?" Taemin offered, not really wanting her to feel too uneasy and walk away.

"Yeah, I'm with my college friends. It's been a while so..." She trailed off while not really looking in his direction.

"Well, aren't you supposed to be drinking beers and not coffee?" He joked as to lighten the mood more.

"I was... until I got a call from our company to do some last-minute work." Hana sighed.

"Really? That ." A frown lightly appeared on his face. "Why does your boss not assign it to someone else instead?"

"I know!" She finally turned to look at him. "I mean, I never really went to a proper vacation for quite some time now. If only I could just ditch the job but I clearly can't. The client is big in the industry business and we can't afford to lose them. Besides, I really don't have a choice but to do it since the client doesn't really want to talk and work with the others. My boss said they specifically asked me and no one else to do the modifications. I mean, sure, it's flattering but... Oh, sorry! I was talking too much, aren’t I? It's just that... I am probably stressed out and couldn't stop myself. I didn't mean to... oh God, here I go again, ranting." Hana sighed and planted her face on her palms.

Taemin stared at her embarrassed form as she started to try composing herself. "Well... it just shows how talented and exceptional you are with your career but I think your top priority should be yourself, you know." He pursed his lips and shrugged. "I am not telling you to quit your job though, unless you're unhappy about it. What I mean is every person deserves a break as well to "function properly". Besides, we can't ignore that there's fun in breaking the rules." He playfully added.

It's always easy to talk to him, Hana thought as she looked up at him with a soft smile. His set of advice was never the wisest or the most eye-opening but talking to him always made her feel lighter and better. He still had that effect on her which probably made it easier for her to let out some of her piled up steam. She hates it. She hates it that he still had that effect on her; that maybe he is still her place of comfort.

"You’re still drawing portraits often?" Taemin suddenly asked and nodded his head at the pencil smudges on her right hand.

"Huh?" She flinched as she was pulled out of her thoughts. "Oh, not that often since I started to become busy these past months. But I still really loved to do it during my limited free time."

"I'm glad you still do. I have always loved your sketches." He sincerely said and started to remember how their old apartment looked like. It was nothing too big or too fancy but they didn't mind at all. He would always come home to see Hana sprawled in the middle of the living room and being surrounded by papers and pencils. She would sometimes draw for her clients and on other days, she would dedicate her whole time to draw for herself. Their place is always filled with sketches of landscapes, skyscrapers, and portraits. He loved all of them especially her sketches of people from her imagination. They always looked very detailed and real except for a certain area. "Well... maybe except for the hands."

"Hey, I tried okay!" Her voiced raised into a defensive tone. "And I am still trying."

Taemin let out a laugh and told her how terrible they were. Hana tried to stop herself from smiling so she kept on defending her skills which made him say more insulting details about her hand drawings. Soon enough, she finally broke her composure and let out a laugh as well which made Taemin stop his teasing slowly. He gazed and took in the view for a while. There she was laughing with the soft light and shadows playing along her skin. He loved seeing her happy and pleased especially if it was because of him. He loved seeing her throwing her head back and closing her eyes as her laughter became music to his ears.

God, he still loved her.

"I missed this." He whispered softly which caused his lovely music to abruptly stop mid-laughter.

Hana looked away, not really knowing how to react. She was caught off guard and she hates it more. She was in a too vulnerable state and she can't let him slowly crawl his way inside her. Not after all the barriers that she built to protect herself from hurting—from everything that involves Lee Taemin.

"Taemin, don't. Your girlfriend won't be too happy to hear that." There was a hint of seriousness in her voice despite her casual tone.

"We..." His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed. "We broke up."

"What?" Hana gasped and her head snapped in Taemin's direction. "Why? What happened?"

"I broke up with her." He leaned back and stared at the fading stars. "I was not happy and I was not myself anymore... maybe I never was. I don't know. It just didn't feel right anymore."

"I thought things would go well for both of you..." She bit her bottom lip and reconsidered her next words. "I thought you love her more than you loved me. I mean... come on, you left me for her after all."

Taemin raised his eyebrows at her statement. "You're the one who left me." He muttered under his breath.

"After all of that, you really expected me to stay?" Her offended voice raised too loud for the empty beach. "I gave you a chance to choose and you didn't say anyone's name! I desperately tried to find a way to convince myself that maybe you're worthy of a second chance but you just kept on showing me that you don't. You never gave me an explanation for everything. All of the times that I was alone, you had someone and that's unfair!"

Hana quickly wiped away the tears that are threatening to fall down on her cheeks. "You didn't even say goodbye." Her voice croaked.

He looked at her as he slowly saw how broken she really was and it was all his fault. He wanted to wipe her tears away but he does not want to cross another line. He has no right to make her feel better about the pain he himself had caused. "I'm sorry... for everything." He was pathetic and he knows it. A lame apology won't magically fix the whole thing and make her better but he was too stupid to believe that maybe it can.

"I... I shouldn't have stayed. I should go." She sniffed and was about to get up when Taemin suddenly grabbed her wrist.

"Hana..." , he was shamelessly selfish. "Please stay."

"Taemin, please I can't--" She was on verge of pleading as she tried to yank her hand away but his hold was too tight.

"I still love you." He confessed with desperation and regret in his voice.

Hana's hand went limp and both of them stayed silent for who knows how long. "And maybe I do too."

Upon hearing her soft feeble voice, Taemin's heart beat faster with her unexpected revelation. He might actually have the chance to get her back and to make things right. To fix what he destroyed and make them even better than before. Maybe there is still a chance? He badly wanted to cling to the new possibilities no matter how slim they were.

"I may still love you but that doesn't change anything." And just like that, she has killed all his hope.

"But why? I can change and make things better. I would do whatever you want, just tell me." He pulled her closer. "I can't lose you again, Hana. I regret everything. Whenever I was with her, all I can think about is you. I realized how much I love you and how badly I want you back. How stupid I was for letting the best girl I ever had got away."

"I can't... I just can’t. Sure, every single time when I see you there's love but that is not the only thing that there is. There's still anger and hate, and I can't let you love a girl who thinks of you like that. It would just never work out for us. Not now."

"Hana—"

"Taemin, I cannot let myself get hurt again." There was sadness in her eyes and voice. If she could, she wanted to run back at him and to throw away all his mistakes, and start anew. She wanted things to go back the way they used to be, just Hana and Taemin. No pain and anger. Just Hana and Taemin again.

She stared back at his dark orbs and blindly searched for a chance for them to be together again. A tear slid down her cheek as the pain stabbed her straight to her heart. It won't go away and it would just keep on breaking her heart over and over. Seeing his face would trigger all the memories—the happy ones and especially the painful ones. She can't love him the way she used to be. Not again. Not anymore.

"I have to make myself my top priority, right?" She leaned over and gave him a last kiss on the cheek and smiled weakly. "It was nice seeing you again, Taemin." She pulled away and got up.

He watched her back as she walked away without giving a him single look back. She slowly disappeared from his sight and he painfully knew she would now just stay in his memories. An ugly reminder that he didn't know how to love. He would only be able to remember her every day and every night. He would the worst thing that happened to her but for him, Hana was the best thing. Hana would always be his best thing.

Taemin stared at the rising sun as the tears started to well up. He closed his eyes and then all he could hear now was the crashing of the waves as his heart slowly got crushed into pieces.