a/n: Scary Love by The Neighbourhood

...

Dahyun stared at her best friend with raised eyebrows from across her bed. 

The shorter girl had just left a couple of hours ago, and yet she was now back at her dorm. Dahyun obviously didn't mind her presence, she just knew something was wrong. Some factors that told her this were that she hadn't since she came, she hadn't smiled fully, and she often spaced out. The pale girl knew her well enough to know something was definitely on her mind, she just wishes her friend would tell her about it. However, Chaeyoung had made it clear she didn't want to talk about it, and if there's anything Dahyun did, it was respect people's boundaries. Despite her moral compass, Chaeyoung's gloomy face was eating away at her. She wanted to desperately help the girl, but she had no idea how. 

"Dahyun, just because you're staring at me with that look it doesn't mean I'm gonna tell you what's on my mind."

The pale girl groaned dramatically. "If I can't help you atleast let me stare at you in peace! I'm trying to read your mind, I was this close to finding out what's wrong."

Chaeyoung laughed, and Dahyun instantly smiled. Looks like she got a win. 

"It really is impossible to stay sad around you, isn't it?" Chaeyoung smiled, appreciating that her friend was a giant ball of sunshine in moments like these. 

Dahyun grinned cheekily, "Does this mean you love me?"

"Ew, no. Absolutely not," Chaeyoung scrunched up her nose. 

The pale girl's grin spread even farther. There was the Chaeyoung she knew and loved. The Chaeyoung that loved to . 

"Chae, you don't have to tell me now, but know that whatever it is I'll help you go through it. Unless what's bothering you is that you have a crush on a man, I'm sorry but that's where I draw the line."

Chaeyoung huffed, "As if that would ever happen. I think I just lost a couple years off my life span at the thought of having feelings for a man."

Both girls laughed, no longer feeling the weight of Chaeyoung's previous mood. If there was anyone Chaeyoung trusted the most in the world, it was Dahyun. Ever since the dawn of their friendship, Chaeyoung had come to the girl for everything that was bothering her, and vice versa. The two were always able to make any issue feel less heavy for the other, therefore not lasting long. Chaeyoung knew she struck some kind of friendship gold when she met Dahyun, and it pained her that she wasn't able to tell her what was going on with her at the moment. She desperately wanted to, but she knew that the timing was not right. Her best friend already had the whole ordeal with Sana on her plate, which was already big enough considered it also involved romantic feelings, a first for Dahyun. So, Chaeyoung knew it was best for her to keep her talk with Momo a secret, atleast until everything else passes. The shorter girl knew she was capable of remaining strong for both her and her best friend, but if Dahyun knew about Momo it would only weigh her heart down more. It was just the kind of person Dahyun was. 

A sudden sound of a ring tone broke through Chaeyoung's thoughts. 

Dahyun's eyes perked up. "I think that's my phone, can you check who it is, Chae? It's on my desk."

Chaeyoung nodded as she shifted closer to the desk, reaching towards the phone. As she turned it on to look at the notification, she saw the contact name 'Mina Unnie' pop up. "It's from Mina, do you want to read it?"

Dahyun furrowed her eyebrows, "Really? From Mina? She never texts me unless it has to do with..." Dahyun eyes widened a bit, as she quickly got near her best friend in order to get her phone. 

The pale girl didn't have to finish her sentence in order for the shorter girl to know what she was about to say. So, she tried to ready herself for whatever it was Mina had sent her. 

Dahyun read over Mina's message, and a frown quickly formed on her face. Chaeyoung's nerves were growing by the second, her palms were beginning to sweat. Especially now that her best friend had such a look of worry. 

"S-She said Sana ran away. They don't know w-where she's at or if she's okay," Dahyun's lips trembled as she stuttered over her words. Chaeyoung placed a hand on her shoulder, ready to comfort her friend, however what she didn't expect was for her to abrubtly stand up from the bed.  

"I-I have to go find her," Dahyun simply mumbled as she quickly put on a pull over over her body. 

Chaeyoung also stood up, now with an incredilous expression. "Dahyun are you crazy? The sun is setting, and you don't even know where she is!"

Dahyun listened as she put on her sneakers. "Mina said she left about an hour ago, and hadn't heard anything from her since then. She said her and Momo will give her space, but what if something happens to her, Chae?"

Chaeyoung couldn't believe the words that were coming out of her best friend's mouth. "Dahyun. She's most likely at some bar somewhere getting faced, please don't go out there especially when it's almost dar-"

Dahyun cut her off with a quick fierce expression, a look Chaeyoung had only seen once in her life, and it was when she got bullied in high school. 

"I'm going to go and look for her, no matter what."

The very tone was enough for Chaeyoung to remain silent. How could she not when Dahyun was almost never mad? The girl hated feeling any negative emotions, so seeing her become frustrated with the short girl left her a bit in shock. She had expected the girl to resort to being sad, not this kind of fire. 

"Bye Chae, I'll come back later. Don't try to look for me," Dahyun said sternly, but when she saw a bit of hurt in Chaeyoung's eyes, she instantly regretted her tone. 

"Please," Dahyun said now a lot more softer. 

Chaeyoung nodded hesitantly as she watched her best friend leave the dorm room. She wasn't planning to go against the older girl's wishes, just as how she wasn't planning on having a possible fight with her. Her worries were building up, and she felt a bit helpless that she couldn't atleast go with Dahyun. 

All she could do was sit and wait until her best friend returned. 

...

"Do you really think it was a good idea to tell Dahyun that Sana ran away?"

It had been almost an hour and ten minutes since they both last saw Sana. Neither had decided to go after their best friend, since they knew that they would be the last people their best friend would like to see. Especially since they had heard their entire conversation. Although Mina appeared to be cakm and relaxed, she was going through an internal downward spiral, and Momo knew that. If there was somone who worried the most within their friendship group, it was Mina, and she did it all so silently. The youngest, for once, had no idea what to do. Her best friend was clearly somewhere very distraught, and there wasn't anything she nor Momo could do. Well atleast, something that would do their runaway best friend any good. So, in a moment of panic, Mina had texted Dahyun about Sana. However, she hadn't gotten a text back, which was very unusual. Mina and Momo's worries only hightened. 

"I.. really can't say, Momo. But what else can we do? If we try to go and look for her she'll only push us away or something," Mina said sullenly. 

Momo, who was sitting on her bed, looked down and sighed. "You're right...but I still feel wrong for not going and doing something."

Mina looked at her friend understandingly. If there was anything the younger wanted to do, it was to go out and look for Sana and comfort her to the best of her abilities. Yet, years of friendship have taught her that right now what her best friend needed was a moment to think. Both her and Momo knew that. That didn't soothe their worries anyhow. 

"She's gonna be okay though, right Mina?" Momo now looked up at her friend with pleading eyes. Mina could tell she was on the verge of crying yet again at the thought that anything would happen to their best friend. To put it out there, Mina had always felt like she had some kind of weight on her shoulders. Although the youngest, her two friends always looked for her to obtain reassurence or a sense of safety. Mina never minded, she liked her friends to be dependent on her. However on times where she too, was deeply worried and unsure, she wishes she wasn't put on a pedastool.  

When Momo was unsure and afraid, she expressed it easily. You could easily tell by her tone, or by the way her eyes wavered. On the other hand, Mina was built far more differently. When she was unsure and afraid, she was very good at masking it with a steady gaze and tone. It was just the way she grew up, she never thought it would feel like a burden at one point. 

In the moment, she was staring at Momo's pleading eyes, and how she knew the girl wanted her to say something, anything, to comfort her. Mina also wanted to lean on someone for once, but for the sake of her friends, she knew she had to continue being the one to rely on. It was what she knew best, so she had to continue all her efforts to ignore the pangs on her chest, and the guilt that was currently feeling like a gun shot. 

"Of course, Momo. Sana will be okay."

...

Dahyun didn't know how long she had been walking for. 

She was too frustrated back at the dorm, and as a result she had forgotten her phone. 

The girl kicked a pebble on the sidewalk as she cursed at herself. She never intended to get too heated over her best friend, her hurt eyes made Dahyun's heart break a bit. She just didn't like the comments Chaeyoung made, it hit her a bit too personally. Dahyun never had issues with how much the shorter girl cared for her, but she was growing tired of being treated like she was some kind of child who couldn't fend for herself. The frustration ended up building up within her, which ended up being released on her best friend. 

Dahyun sighed, the last thing she wanted to do was to fight with Chaeyoung. She wanted to do something that wasn't cowardly for once. She wanted to feel like maybe just maybe, she wasn't afraid over something that was considered so childish. She wanted to look for Sana, and make sure she was okay. 

Thoughts had been creeping in her mind as she walked through the streets. Thoughts of Sana getting extremely drunk, therefore getting taken advantage of by whoever wanted to prey on her. Thoughts of Sana being passed out somewhere in some dark alleyway, getting robbed or even worse, kidnapped. 

Due to her rushing thoughts, the pale girl's steps became quicker in desperation of finding her room mate as soon as possible. 

She passed by many stores and vendors, finding Sana in neither of them. She went to the cafe shops and resteraunts that she knew Momo and Mina went to often, and was yet again met with disappointment. Dahyun wishes she knew more about Sana in order to be able to accurately guess her whereabouts.  

There was only one place Dahyun knew the girl liked to go, and that was to her usual bar. 

Dahyun was dreading having to go to any of those sorts of places. Despite the negative feeling build up within her stomach, she knew Sana's well being was far more important than her comfort zone. 

The pale girl walked towards the streets where most of the bars and clubs where, and she could already smell the stench of alcohol, puke, and smoke. Dahyun hated all of these scents, all it did was remind her of her past. So, she wonders why she didn't hate it when Sana contained a few of these scents. 

Ignoring the ocassional whistles and cat calls, Dahyun made her way through each bar and club. She had no idea which was the one that Sana went to regularly, the idea that she was a bit lost was becoming more of a reality. 

Each club or bar had the same dreary image of hormone-filled people who only desired to get lucky. That or people who simply wanted to fill their alcoholic needs. Every single one she entered showed no signs of her room mate, and the blaring music was starting to feel like they were gonna burst her ears soon. 

Dahyun was about to give up, until she felt become parched. She had been walking for so long, she had become thirsty. She hesitated walking into a bar to get a drink of whatever, but she saw a final bar at the corner of the street and she figured that it was better than nothing. 

As she entered the building, she caught sight of what could only be raging college students. The pale girl pushed her way through the massive amount of bodies in order to get to the actual bar. 

She quickly took a seat, and waited for a bartender to come over. 

A young woman who looked like she was in her mid twenties arrived, and smiled sweetly at Dahyun. Dahyun looked over to the woman's name tag, which read 'Jihyo'.

"What would it be, love?"

Dahyun looked unsurely at all the bottles of alcohol that were proudly displayed on shelves. The last thing she wanted was to get drunk. 

"Do you have anything that doesn't have alcohol?" she said shyly.

The bartender raised her eyebrow, then chuckled. "You don't come to these kind of places, do you?"

Dahyun nodded coyly, a bit embarassed that she was a bit obvious. 

"I'll give you a glass of water, then," Jihyo smiled sweetly as she headed over to get it ready. 

The pale girl shifted a bit uncomfortably on her seat, anxious to leave the place already. She really wondered how Sana felt at ease in these places, or even Momo and Mina. Dahyun felt anything but at ease at the moment, she almost began wishing Chaeyoung was here. Maybe she had been wrong about being able to do anything herself. Maybe she was destined to be taken care of by Chaeyoung forever. Maybe her parents had been right about-

Dahyun's thougths were cut short by the abrupt sound of a glass cup being placed infront of her. She looked up to see Jihyo's face with furrowed brows. 

"You look like you have a lot on your mind, kiddo. Mind filling me in?"

The younger girl looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "Aren't you supposed to be working?"

The bartender shrugged. "Maybe so, but I'm always a er for a stranger's life story. What's my boss gonna do? Fire me? As if, I'm his hottest bartender and he knows it."

Dahyun chuckled and felt much more at ease now. She thought over telling the girl about what was going on, and she figured that it wouldn't hurt to release some of her worry out loud. 

"My room mate sort of ran away a couple hours ago, and I don't know where she is.  It's driving me insane, I just want to make sure she's okay, especially since she has her issues. I haven't seen her in months. The only thing I pretty much know is that she always goes to this bar with her two friends, but I don't even know the bar. So I've been going to every damn club and bar in this damn area and I've gotten nowhere. This isn't even my scene! But I'm doing this because holy , maybe I'm falling for her and she's out there probably drunk off of her mind and what guy wouldn't want to get with a pretty japanese girl?" Dahyun had started off calmly, but by the end she had begun rambling. She hoped it didn't weird out the bartender, when she looked up she saw the woman with wide eyes. 

"Holy ."

Dahyun furrowed her eyebrows, "Is that really all you have to say?"

"Is your name Dahyun?" The woman asked a bit more seriously than her initial mood. 

The pale girl felt deja vu over the time when she first met Momo and Mina at the cafe and how they also somehow knew her name. "Um, yes?"

Jihyo's mouth went agape. "Holy , It all makes sense now! The pale skin, the blonde hair! Holy ! It's you! You're the girl Sana always talks about!"

At the sound of her room mate's name, Dahyun's eyes perked up. This was the bar, the bar Sana always went to. She had found it, and by sheer coincidence. 

"Sana? You know Sana? Please tell me where she is!" Dahyun began pleading. 

The bartender raised her hands up a bit, "She came around here a few hours ago, but she left about 20 minutes ago, kid. She didn't tell me where she was going, I'm sorry. But she's probably still nearby."

Dahyun quickly got off her stool, and took out a few bills from her pocket. "Thank you for that, um Jihyo, right? I have to go now." 

The bartender watched as the pale girl placed the bills on the bar, then hurriedly walked out of the building, desperately pushing past any body that was in her way. 

As soon as Dahyun exited the bar, she walked around nearby areas in search for her room mate. She had a new found hope thanks to the information provided by the bartender, but she still had to find her.

Dahyun was feeling fine through out the entire search mission, but that was only because the streets were brightly illuminated by the countless neon signs from clubs and bars. 

However, now that she had escaped the busy area, she was now somewhere that was quite dark. Actually, a lot more dark. 

Dahyun could feel her breathing quicken and her heart start beating faster, but she tried her best to ignore it all. She didn't want her phobia to make an entrance now out of all times. The pale girl knew this was what Chaeyoung had warned her about, but a big part of her wanted to be able to atleast fight against her fear. She wanted to feel like she still had some control or atleast some power over it. The last thing she wanted was to weakly succumb to it. 

So, despite her growing nerves, Dahyun continued walking through the dark streets and alleyways.

Soon, everything began to feel like it was closing in on her. She tried to remain calm by breathing in and out slowly, but all it did was make her heart rush in fear. Dahyun's vision was clouded by darkness and endless possibilities of danger. Every corner she looked at only seemed to scream unsafety. The pale girl felt trapped and surrounded by her own demons. 

As Dahyun gasped for air, she clutched her chest with her hand. She wanted so badly for it to stop. She internally begged for some kind of miracle to occur and a light would suddenly appear. The pale girl felt as tears welled up in her eyes, feeling utterly pathetic. No matter how hard she had tried to not let herself dwelve in her fears, it seemed to swallow her whole. She felt useless, weak at the feet of her phobia. 

Her panic attack got worse by the minute, and her heart hadn't calmed down. Dahyun wanted to scream. She wanted Chaeyoung to suddenly appear just as she did all those years ago. She wanted anybody, desperation to escape this hell grew within her. 

Dahyun ran into an alleyway that looked that had a faint light, and sat by the corner. 

She hid her head in her arms, letting her tears stream down her cheeks. She didn't even stop herself from being audible about it, she figured she was more than alone. Dahyun began to harshly curse at herself mentally for being so pathetic. She wishes she had never obtained this stupid phobia. She wishes she didn't have to rely so much on other things in order for her to feel at ease. She wishes her dumb panic attacks would vanish already. 

All Dahyun wanted was to find Sana and make sure she was safe and sound. She wasn't even able to do that, all because of the dark. 

Dahyun only cried harder at the thought of her own failure. Due to that, she was barely able to hear the voice of a stranger.

"Dahyun?! Oh my ing god, Dahyun, what are you doing here?"

At the sound of the voice, Dahyun looked up. She was met with a familiar face that she had wanted to so desperately see for the longest time. Without thinking, Dahyun immediately pounced on Sana and wrapped her arms around her, hoping for any kind of comfort. 

The japanese girl immediately wrapped her arms around the younger's shivering body. "Dahyun? Its because it's dark right?!" Sana asked hurriedly, wanting to put the poor girl at ease as soon as possible. 

Dahyun slightly nodded her head against her chest, which Sana would've found absolutely adorable had it not been for the circumstances. Sana did the only thing she could think of doing, she picked up the smaller girl and carried her bridal style and quickly padded her way out of the dark corner and somewhere that had a lot more light. Sana was nowhere near muscular, so her arms were growing tired quickly. Fortunately, a local park came into view, with bright street lights. 

The japanese girl quickly sat on the first bench she saw and placed the trembling girl on her lap. Sana caressed the younger girl's hair in order to soothe her as she dug her face in the crook of Sana's neck. Due to the close proximity, Sana was able to hear the girl's sniffles and tiny pleas for help. It broke her heart. She then realized this was what happened when Dahyun's phobia acted up, and she wanted to never see it happen again. She now understood where Chaeyoung came from, and why she was over protective. Tears were threatening to fall at the sight of Dahyun, but Sana forced herself to remain strong for the girl. 

"Dahyunnie, hey, it's going to be okay. I'm here now, okay? And look! I found some light!"

Dahyun shifted a bit, then looked up. The sight pained Sana even more. Now that she saw the girl's face in the light, she took notice of her tear stained face and her red wide eyes; with her lips trembling in fear. Sana hated seeing this image. She wanted Dahyun's radiating smile back. She wanted her bright eyes that screamed happiness to come back. 

Dahyun's breathing slowed down a bit now that she took in that there was in fact, light now. She was able to feel comfort in knowing that she was now safe. Then she remembered Sana had to carry her, and had to witness her at her worst. It made the pale girl feel even more pathetic. 

"I'm... I'm so sorry you had to see me like that," Dahyun mumbled quietly. 

Sana shook her head quickly. "Hey no no no! Don't be sorry! I'm the one who should be sorry... you came all the way out here to look for me, didn't you?" Sana knew this was the most reasonable option, considering she knew the only thing near here were bars and clubs, all which Dahyun didn't like. 

Dahyun looked down and nodded shyly. "Still, you had to carry me and everything. God, I'm such a baby."

Sana placed her hand under Dahyun's chin, and lifted it up so that there eyes would meet. "Dahyunnie, don't talk about yourself like that. You have no control over your phobia. Also, I don't mind taking care of you," the japanese girl said softly.

Dahyun felt herself blush a bit at both the intense eye contact and the hand under her chin. She was at a loss of words. 

"I-uh, thank you Sana-ya," the younger mumbled.

Sana chuckled a bit, and wondered if she should remind the girl that she was currently sitting on her lap. However, Sana was enjoying this, so she decided to let it go on longer. 

"Now do you mind telling me what happened?"

Dahyun narrowed her eyes, she was here to find out whar happened to Sana, not the other way around. "Only if you tell me what happened to you after." Dahyun knew it was a bit of a bold move, especially with Sana's barriers. She mainly expected her room mate to reject her request. 

To her surpise, Sana nodded. Dahyun was a bit shocked, but began to explain any way. 

"Well I, I was at our dorm with Chae, we were keeping eachother company. Then Mina texted me, and said you ran away. So the first thing that came into my mind was, hey, I have to look for her. Chaeyoung tried to stop me, but I came anyway."

Sana giggled lightly at the girl's stubborness.

"I figured if you would go somewhere, it would be your usual bar right? But the thing is, I didn't know which one it was. So I went to every single one of them."

Sana felt her heart swell a bit at the thought of how persistent Dahyun was on finding her, but also frowned that she had managed to cause all of this trouble on the younger girl. 

"I got thirsty, so I went to this last bar. Then I met Jihyo, the bartender, I guess you know her? She said you were there earlier. So she said you must be nearby. I didn't realize the streets were getting darker cause I was so focused on finding you, but then... well you know the rest," the girl trailed off. 

Sana looked fondly at the korean girl, and moved her hand up to her cheek. "Dahyun... what did I ever do to deserve someone like you?"

Dahyun would've blushed had it not been for the tone Sana used. Which implied she was unworthy of being cared for. 

"I wanted to know if you were safe. Now tell me what happened."

Sana retracted her hand and sighed deeply. She knew she had to tell the girl, she owed her that much after all the trouble, plus she kind of promised. 

"I overheard a conversation with Mina and Momo, and it sort of upsetted me. I ran away, and you're right, I did go to my usual bar. I wanted to get drunk off of my mind, but Jihyo stopped me. That girl, I swear she gets a kick out of being my pretend therapist. Either way, I can't really tell you the small details... can I tell you tomorrow? I'm sorry," Sana pouted. 

Dahyun nodded, "Don't be sorry, you can tell me more tomorrow."

The korean girl smiled at her, and Sana felt every weight lifted off her chest. She knew she missed the girl, but now that she was here she realized she had missed her so much more than she thought. The japanese girl wanted to continue seeing her smile forever. 

"As much as I like this position, I think the circulation to my leg has been cut off," Sana teased the girl. 

Dahyun stared at her confused, until she looked down and realized she had been sitting on her lap the entire time. She blushed furiously, and jumped out of her position. 

Sana chuckled at the girl's reaction. "You're so cute. Let's head back to the dorm, yeah?"

The korean girl nodded coyly.

The two girls began walking back to their building. However, the area where Dahyun got a panic attack came into view, and her nerves threatened to come back. 

Hearing her breath hitch, Sana quickly took notice of what had gone on in Dahyun's mind. She took hold of the younger girl's trembling hand, and squeezed it tightly. The action seemed to reassure the girl, as her breathing went back to normal.

"I'm here for you, Dahyunnie. I'm not going anywhere," the japanese girl said softly. 

Dahyun looked up to the girl and immediately felt at ease. She never knew holding Sana's hand would make her feel so much at ease, she never wanted this sensation to end. 

Both girls walked through the streets and pass all the bars hand in hand, content in their comfortable silence. 

When they finally arrived at their dorm, Dahyun found out Chaeyoung must've gone back to her own dorm. Which is a bit of a relief, she wouldn't of heard the end of it if Chaeyoung found out she had a panic attack. 

The two girl's took turns taking showers and doing their night routines. 

When they were done, they each laid in their own bed. 

However, Dahyun felt a little too alone. 

"Sana-ya?"

"Hm?" Sana hummed. 

"Can you um, maybe come sleep with me?"

All Dahyun heard was silence, and she slowly began to regret her request.

"Nevermind! I'm sorr-"

Dahyun wasn't able to finish her sentence as Sana quickly got up from her bed and placed herself next to Dahyun's body.

"Don't be silly Dahyun, why would I refuse?" She smiled sweetly as she wrapped her arm over the smaller figure of the korean girl. Dahyun immediately made herself more comfortable as she cuddled closer to Sana, sighing happily.

"I missed you so much, you know? Even if I already didn't see you often, I still missed you. Chaeyoung teased me so much about it. I even tried feeling like if the night light you gave me was somehow connected to you, but it wasn't enough," Dahyun confessed shyly.

Sana smiled sadly as she heard Dahyun's words. Little did the girl know that it was just the same for Sana. Everyday, the korean girl was all that she could think about. Whether it being her smile, her voice, or merely her presence. The japanese girl had missed it all so dearly. Now that she was back, she realized just how much the younger girl had an effect on her.

"I missed you too, Dahyun-ah," she whispered fondly.

"I'm not going to run away again, I'm staying next to you."

Both girls smiled at eachother lazily, letting themselves relax under their own warmth. They soon fell under a peaceful sleep. 

...

a/n: OOF do yall know how hard it was to write dahyun going through a panic attack? i felt my own heart break i dont know how people can write angst. Anyway, to those who comment/read, thank you! Although not that many comment im still thankful for the few that do, they make me want to write more. To those who have commented on like, my writing style, they mean alot! Either way, i appreciate any comment. 

i hope you all have a nice day ! <3