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Sick of Losing Soulmates

If there was one person that Do Kyungsoo would indefinitely call his soulmate it’d be none other than Kim Jongin. It wasn’t as though they were two people who fell in love, it wasn’t that kind of soulmate. It had to do with their friendship. A strong friendship that budded when they were in their freshman year of college, a strong friendship that continued growing until it was the vast garden that it was now.

There were a lot of reasons why Kyungsoo adored Jongin as much as he did. A lot of it had to do with how in sync they were with one another. From the beginning it’d been easy to read one another, able to tell when they had something to say or nothing at all. It was the kind of friendship one didn’t find often, one where they completed one another in ways that couldn’t be understood.

Now you might call Kyungsoo sappy and a little over dramatic but then again Jongin would probably say the same thing, which made them soulmates. They didn’t argue often, since they were both the types to internalize a lot however when one had something that needed to be said, the other would listen. It was all they needed really. A mutual understanding. Kyungsoo and Jongin were the best of friends and they would be nothing more than that as time went on.

No matter how much Kyungsoo wished otherwise.

 

It’s a Thursday afternoon, a little past 5PM and Kyungsoo is standing in front of the stove in his kitchen. He has a hand on his hip and an apron tied around his waist as he stirs the stew bubbling in the pot. He’d actually arrived home from work not too long ago and was currently preparing dinner for he and his roommate Jongin, to enjoy. Kyungsoo worked as a chef at a fancy brunch spot in the centre of town so it wasn’t unusual for him to be home so early.

Jongin on the other hand worked as a dance teacher at an academy not too far from here, but that meant that his days began early and ran late. Kyungsoo and Jongin had both been lucky enough to be find work as soon as they graduated college, already having been considered by numerous places due to their achievements in school. They’d managed to save up enough money while actually in school with the plan to rent an apartment together to lessen the costs.

And so here they were six months later, steadily paying back their school loans while living their dreams together. It was a simple routine really. Living with Jongin wasn’t much different than he’d imagined it. It was a known fact that Jongin could be on the more messy side but he kept it confined in his bedroom so Kyungsoo didn’t mind. They didn’t get tired of each other, knowing when the other needed space and when they needed company.

Kyungsoo was happy. Really happy. Life was going swell at the moment and it was really all he needed. A stable income, a place to call home, a best friend, he had all that he needed. Kyungsoo decides to ignore the other things that he’d like, completely putting a lid on the thought of love and finding a significant other. He shakes his head as he turns his attention back to the pot on the stove and he hears the jingling of one too many keychains as well as the front door being opened.

“Welcome home Jongin,” Kyungsoo greets as soon as the door is closed and locked once more. Jongin lifts his head and he seems tired. His hair is a mess, like he hadn’t gotten the chance to shower and his clothes were rumpled like he hadn’t changed just yet. It’s not hard to tell that Jongin probably didn’t have a very good day so Kyungsoo doesn’t stare, turning back to his stew like he hadn’t noticed anything. Although he knew Jongin would know he did.

“Hey hyung,” Jongin says quietly and Kyungsoo hums in response as Jongin removes his shoes and lugs himself through the apartment and into his bedroom slamming his door shut. Kyungsoo flinches at the loud sound but he doesn’t take anything personally. He knew Jongin better than anyone else after all. Both he and his best friend liked to be alone when they had a bad day, needing to think about things thoroughly or not at all.

Kyungsoo doesn’t even have to call Jongin out for dinner. As he’s plating up the food Jongin appears, fresh and relaxed after a shower. It was an unspoken rule in their home that if it was possible, dinner would never be eaten alone. Jongin sits down and thanks Kyungsoo for the meal before he begins eating. Kyungsoo offers him a small smile before he does the same, warmth spreading in his chest as he eats the hot stew.

There’s a lot he wants to ask, after all it was human nature to be curious. But Kyungsoo never did. He’d learned a long time ago when it was appropriate to ask and when it was appropriate to wait. Jongin clearly wasn’t feeling too talkative tonight, usually excited to tell Kyungsoo all about his day and to hear about the chef’s in return. The silence was thick and it was heavy but it wasn’t suffocating nor was it uncomfortable.

Kyungsoo can see that Jongin doesn’t eat less than he normally does so he has no real concerns. Jongin would talk to him when he was ready or if he felt it was needed at all, which sometimes it definitely wasn’t. They finish eating together and one by one the dishes are piled up in the sink, they stand close with their hips touching as they wash and dry the dishes. As soon as they were done Jongin looks ready to crash in his bedroom but Kyungsoo lightly grabs his wrist.

“Living room? I missed you,” Kyungsoo whispers and he feels the knot in his stomach unfurl when Jongin nods. They part to go to their respective bedrooms, Kyungsoo returns to his own to grab his blue headphones and his ipad. When Kyungsoo enters the living room once more Jongin is already there, looking comfortable as he sits with a book by his side, his glasses on his nose. Jongin doesn’t say anything and he turns on the lamp beside him as Kyungsoo comes closer.

Kyungsoo takes his chance to lie down and he borrows Jongin’s thigh for a pillow. He gets himself comfortable and plugs in his headphones, already searching through a selection of movies as he sees Jongin opening his book from the corner of his eye. Kyungsoo adjusts himself so that the hood of his black hoodie is laying over Jongin’s thigh where his shorts have ridden up, not wanting to prick his friend’s skin with the short hair on the back of his head.

He crosses his legs and he leans back naturally, finally deciding on a movie to watch. It’s moments like these that Kyungsoo really cherishes the friendship he has with Jongin. He could feel that their friendship ran deeper than words and that was truly reassuring, especially since he himself wasn’t always the best with them. As he’s reading the subtitles for his movie he feels fingers weaving into his hair and he lets out a deep breath.

Jongin continues playing with his hair without a care in the world and Kyungsoo feels his heart pounding, he’s only afraid Jongin will hear it. Once he’s halfway through his movie he feels a tap on his head and he looks up at Jongin, pausing his movie as he removes his headphones. For a moment Kyungsoo can only stare as Jongin looks at him. Jongin’s face is casted by soft shadows but the light of the lamp makes his skin glow, he has a small smile on his lips and he’s looking at Kyungsoo like he makes the sun rise.

Then again, Jongin looked at everyone like that.

“Have you been using my shampoo again?” Jongin teases and Kyungsoo hates how much hearing his voice brings immediate relief to all of his troubles. Truth be told he has been using Jongin’s shampoo, mainly because he hasn’t had the time to buy his own and they use the same brand, except Kyungsoo uses the original scent while Jongin prefers the apple scent. Kyungsoo rolls his eyes with a smile,

“And have you just been casually sniffing my hair? Way to be a creep Jongin,” Kyungsoo teases in return and Jongin grins. There it is. That wonderful smile that Kyungsoo had been dying to see all day. From the crinkle of his eyes to the scrunching his nose, white teeth on full display along with a faint dimple in his cheek. The fatigue vanishes from Jongin’s face in a heartbeat, his expression gentle.

Kyungsoo reaches upward to find Jongin’s hand that’s now pulling on his hair and he doesn’t bat an eyelash when their fingers intertwine. Kyungsoo’s breath hitches and he can only focus on the feeling of Jongin’s calloused fingertips against his own. Feeling like they’ve lingered a moment too long Kyungsoo pulls away first. Jongin snaps out of his reverie and he looks at Kyungsoo who refuses to meet his eyes.

“Goodnight Jongin,” Kyungsoo hopes that his heart isn’t on his sleeve right now, because he’s afraid. He’s afraid of these feelings he has for Jongin.

 

Needless to say Kyungsoo spends the next few days to himself. Like Kyungsoo, Jongin too knows when his friend needs to be left alone so Kyungsoo hopes that he doesn’t misunderstand. It’d been awhile since Kyungsoo felt his suppressed feelings this strongly. So that meant he really needed his time alone to properly hide them once more, delicately taking the time to place each feeling into a chest before he could lock it away safely.

As much as they comforted one another when together that still didn’t mean that they should do so when they’re both feeling under the weather. That would just result in numerous things Kyungsoo didn’t want to think about right now. Jongin was his best friend and that was all he wished for, that was all he needed, anything more would be too selfish. Not to mention how it could possibly jeopardize their bond they’d grown together.

“Kyungsoo hyung,” Kyungsoo jolts and he comes crashing back to reality. He sees a hand waving in front of his face and when he looks up he sees a very concerned Jongin looking back at him. Kyungsoo clears his throat and he pastes a smile onto his lips.

“Hey Jongin, what’s up?” Kyungsoo asks and Jongin doesn’t seem convinced in the slightest, his brows furrowed and a small pout on his lips. Kyungsoo realizes that he hasn’t gotten a good look at Jongin in awhile, he must’ve skipped on shaving because he had a clear shadow of stubble poking at the surface of his skin.

“Want to hang out? I miss you,” Kyungsoo’s reminded of his own words but the fact that Jongin still misses him despite being right in front of him makes his heart ache. So he doesn’t refuse. He misses his best friend as well. Kyungsoo stands from his chair and he follows Jongin, confused when his friend holds his hand and drags him into his bedroom rather than the living room.

Since they started living together Kyungsoo had been in Jongin’s bedroom a total of three times. They avoided each other’s room as much as possible, opting to spend time together in the shared space of their living room instead. The few times they had to invade one another’s space was either because one of them was sick or because Jongin had overslept and his alarm had driven Kyungsoo crazy.

So he was more than surprised when tugged him onto the bed. Kyungsoo doesn’t have much time to react as he’s pulled flush against Jongin, his back against his best friend’s chest. The contact is warm and puts him at ease. Kyungsoo freezes, unsure of what to do with himself and he can’t help his wandering eyes. Jongin’s room was indeed messy, his desk was covered in papers and he had a number of clothes strewn across the floors.

It was cozy. Which would describe Jongin perfectly. Kyungsoo slowly begins to relax in Jongin’s embrace and he feels himself melting as Jongin holds him closer. Kyungsoo keeps his head down and his eyes widen when Jongin intertwines their fingers, just like the other night.

“You’re hiding something from me,” the soft rumble of Jongin’s voice makes Kyungsoo feel more than he should. He cowers and wants to refuse but then again, it was hard to lie to Jongin.

“Why are you running away from me Kyungsoo hyung?” Jongin sounds sad. Kyungsoo never wants Jongin to be sad and it doesn’t make him feel any better knowing that he’s the cause for his best friend’s sadness. Jongin buries his face against Kyungsoo’s shoulder and he inhales deeply, his breath tickling Kyungsoo’s skin when he exhales. Kyungsoo really doesn’t know what to say at this point.

“Hyung, you forget that I know everything about you. I thought you knew everything about me too?” Those words sting more than Jongin could ever understand. What could Kyungsoo possibly not know about Jongin? Was he hiding something? Kyungsoo’s confused.

“I can hear you thinking hyung, let me show you something,” Jongin sounds oddly giddy and Kyungsoo turns his head to look at him. Shocked when he feels plush lips on the corner of his mouth. He sits there blinking for a moment, his lips parted as his brain struggles to work once more. Jongin beams at his reaction and he kisses him again, in the same spot.

“Do you understand? May I kiss you where I want to please?” Jongin asks politely and Kyungsoo’s cheeks flush. He nods his head and closes his eyes, pleased when he gets the full sensation of Jongin’s lips against his own this time. His chest falls apart in a millisecond, all of his feelings filling his heart as they kiss. Kyungsoo pulls away abruptly and Jongin does as well, worried that he crossed the line.

“B-but Jongin, what if this doesn’t go well. I don’t want to lose my best friend,” I don’t want to lose my soulmate. Kyungsoo wonders if he’s being foolish. Jongin however, never makes him feel that way. He does not laugh, nor does he roll his eyes. He gives Kyungsoo all of his attention and his most serious face,

“Kyungsoo hyung, things don’t really have to change between us. We already live like an old married couple anyways, just now, I can kiss you, you can touch me, we don’t have to be as careful around one another,” Jongin explains to him slowly and he watches as Kyungsoo pieces together what their future might look like.

Once he sees that heart shaped smile he knows that they’re going to be just fine.

 

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A/N

BAHAHAHA I'll excuse myself now

Thank you for reading! <3

- Airi

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Comments

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pcyms7
#1
Chapter 1: That was really clean and cute. Yes. Thanks for writing, Authornim! xoxo
chrishah_75
#2
Chapter 1: I don't know why I'm crying, man... This is gold. And gold is you... And i love you... Thank you...
INFTINSPIRIT97
#3
Chapter 1: "We already live like an old married couple" no truer words have been ever said xD
Nicole121314 #4
Chapter 1: Nice one.. at least Jongin is brave enough to show to Kyungsoo hehe. Love it
bananamilkeu
#5
Chapter 1: Dies with all the fluff ♡♡
olio_beesz
#6
Chapter 1: Why this is so kawaii!♥