— summer;

 

 

Feet were dipped into the pool, swishing around in the water. The stick of a er hung from , vaguely resembling a cigarette (a bad habit soon to come).

 

Pale legs contrasted with the tan ones next to them. Both girls had smiles on their faces, between their hips were interlaced fingers.

 

The brunette leaned onto the blondes shoulder. Her tongue pushed the er off to the side, allowing her to speak.

 

“Do you love me?”

 

The blonde’s breath caught in . Surprise wrote across her features. The question was loaded, a gun cocked at her. It was unexpected, and now she had no idea how to respond to the younger girl.

 

“I…” She inhaled, before smiling. “Let’s swim?”

 

The brunette wasn’t satisfied with the answer but allowed herself to be pulled into the pool none the less.

 

Later on in life, there would be time for the blonde to answer those questions (she wouldn’t).

 

Brunette and blonde hair intertwined as the two held their breath under water, looking at eachother through the chlorinated water.

 

The brunette could see herself spending hundreds of summer nights tangled up with the blonde.

 

The blonde couldn’t.

 

The two girls swam for two hours, emerging from the water late into the afternoon, both of their skins a different color.

 

The blonde was tanner, the brunette was a burnt red.

 

The question remained unanswered, even after the brunette went in for a kiss.

 

The blonde scolded her for doing it in the public.

 

All she got was a grin and insincere apology.

 

They walked home hand in hand.

 

It was a summer day like every other summer day.

 

--

 

Weeks passed like this, lazy days spent at the pool.

 

Finally the last Sunday of summer rolled around.

 

The blonde dyed her hair a sandy brown, the brunette stayed the same.

 

The ex-blonde began wearing short skirts, and more accentuating tops.

 

The brunette continued wearing skinny jeans and hoodies.

 

Change was turning into effect, and the consequences were inevitable and unavoidable. The truth was coming, and it was coming fast.

 

--

 

“Soojung.”

 

The brunette looked up, a smile spreading across her features the moment she saw the slightly shorter girl.

 

“Sunyoung!” She stood up, rushing over to pull the older into a hug.

 

It was a one sided action. Soojung’s brows knitted up, confusion stamped across her face. “Unnie…? Are you okay? You look upset.”

 

The girl nodded, and the exhaled. “I’m sorry.” The language and tone quickly transitioned. From English to Korean, light and airy to solemn and very deep. “Soojung…”

 

The brunette panicked and grabbed the shorter girls shoulders, she swallowed. Her eyes were widened with fear. “I love you. Please…”

 

Sunyoung shrugged her hands from her shoulders and shook her head. “I’m not gay. It was for fun. I don’t love you, I was just curious. It was the summer. Grow up well, Soojung-ah. You’re a pretty girl, find a good man. Grow up, get married, laugh about this in the future.”

 

--

 

That sort of rejection destroyed Soojung.

 

She cried for hours that night. Two weeks into the school year, and she was unable to do her work. She cried herself to the point of becoming sick.

 

Her mother asked what was wrong, what could she do to help her?

 

Nothing, Soojung had cried, nothing could fix her broken heart. Even more, she was terrified of telling her mother just why she was so upset. What if she was the same way Sunyoung was?

 

When she went to bed, she was more than grateful for the cold sheets against her skin. Even though she still cried, and her heart was still broken, the cold sheets helped to remind her of this; teenage heartbreak will never last.

 

--

 

After missing a grand total of three school days, Soojung was reluctantly forced back into school.

 

Like a zombie, she walked to her Geography class. Because no matter what she told herself, heartbreak seemed to be forever. It felt painful, her mind said it’d be okay but the feeling of her chest caving in made that so terribly hard to believe.

 

Sitting down in her desk, Soojung came to the ultimate conclusion that she was grieving. Grieving the good morning kisses that would never be. Grieving the walks on the beach they’d never have. Grieving the lazy summer days that would never become a part of her life again.

 

Just those thoughts alone were enough to make her cry some more. It wasn’t the same as the loud sobs that racked her body the night before, it was silent and hidden.

 

Soojung was accepting and adapting as well as she could. Because heartbreak can only last so long.