A/N: Hi, thanks to those of you who did read the first part, I just wanted to clear something up about this. I apologize to anyone thinking this would end up as a seudly fic in anyway, that was not my intention. The only real reason I had Seulgi kiss her in the first part was to show how overwhelmed and shocked she was by the news and become confused with everything going on, but not for it to look like that would be an option. Please enjoy chapter 2 which is Irene’s POV.

 

Bae Joohyun found herself anxiously waiting for her girlfriend Seulgi to return home. Last night they ended up in one of the most awful fights in a while. That’s not to say they haven’t been fighting more lately in general. The state of their relationship now compared to the earlier stages are so far apart. Where they used to laugh and enjoy just being together, has now been replaced with more fighting and arguing than ever. The last 6 months have been so hard for them. Joohyun knows that no relationship is easy, and that there are bad times to go along with any good moments. She can see that things aren’t the same as before.

 

That doesn’t mean Joohyun isn’t still so in love with Seulgi. She is very much in love with the younger girl, and when she wondered about marriage for them. It was because she was serious about her and their future. She believes they can get through this rough patch and come out stronger in the end.

 

“Marriage,” the raven sighs. The topic was part of the reason why they fought, and it turned so ugly. It wasn’t at all how they would have spoken to one another before.

 

(Flashback)

 

Joohyun had made it back home before Seulgi as she expected. The younger girl had not too long finished university and was working. She had long hours most days at the record company she was hired at for dance choreography. Joohyun hoped they could have had dinner together, but she understood why that wouldn’t be possible. There are also times she’s working late too, and scheduling issues can’t be helped. Still, she waited up for her girlfriend to come home. She wants to talk to her.

 

When she did return home it was later than what Joohyun expected. Almost midnight by the time she walked in looking exhausted. The taller girl sort of nodded to her and said she was going to grab herself some instant noodles before getting a shower. Joohyun knew deep down now wasn’t the right time to talk. The raven also couldn’t help the need to talk to Seulgi now. They barely seem to talk much these days. There just doesn’t seem to be time.

 

“Seul, we should really talk about what we didn't get to finish discussing before.”

 

“Hyunnie, honestly can we not right now. I’m tired and I just want to go to bed.”

 

“I know, I’m sorry. I just know if we don’t talk at least a little now, then we won’t get to talk anytime soon. You’re busy these days, and I work late hours sometimes. We hardly seem to make the time for basic conversations,” Joohyun says and observes the way Seulgi simply gets up, and throws away the empty noodle cup. She turns around to face her.

 

“Hyun, I know, okay. I’m sorry I’m busy these days.”

 

“Do you think that’s why I’m upset? I just want us to put more effort into our relationship. I love you, Seul.”

 

“I love you too, Hyunnie. I just don’t think we should be talking about marriage right now.”

 

“If not now then when? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with us talking about marriage.”

 

Seulgi looks at her in disbelief. She doesn’t look tired anymore, so Joohyun knows they will certainly talk now.

 

“I just don’t think we should be thinking about it.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Hyunnie, really? We haven’t been in the best place to even be considering marriage lately.”

 

“I know, but it’s still something I want to talk about. Unless, you just don’t see yourself marrying me. Is there someone else..”

 

The monolid girl sighs tiredly. She doesn’t understand why it is Joohyun keeps thinking there’s anyone else. She has tried to show the older woman that she is more than enough for her, and that she’s not interested in seeing anyone else. She doesn’t understand why Joohyun feels like she’s not enough. She’s one of the most amazing women she has ever known. Joohyun is kind, sweet, warm, loving, and anyone would be lucky to have her in their life.

 

“Hyun, why do we keep on having this same argument? I’m not cheating on you and I haven’t thought about it.”

 

“We’ve been fighting a lot lately, and you’re a really popular person, Seul. Ever since I’ve known you, there has always been a girl interested in you.”

 

“That means I’m interested back! Come on, Hyun you’re going to have to start trusting me at some point here, otherwise it’s just pointless.”

 

Joohyun can’t hide her hurt at that comment. It sounds to her like Seulgi is giving up on them, or half-way about to be giving up on them. That’s the last thing she wants is for them to breakup, but in her hurt she continues the fight.

 

“Then are you sick of me, is that it? You want to end this relationship before you get any sicker?”

 

“I’m sick of you not trusting me, and I just don’t know what to do anymore about it. You have it in your head that you’re not enough for me, but maybe I’m the one that’s not enough for you, Joohyun.”

 

“That’s not true, baby. I love you..”

 

“You say that but then you say things that suggest you don’t trust me, Hyun. I don’t want to keep having this fight, and you know we shouldn’t be talking about something as big as marriage at this current state of the relationship.”

 

Joohyun doesn’t remember what was said, or what triggered the fight to escalate. All she remembers is telling Seulgi to get out, and watching as she grabbed her keys and wallet and did just that. She left and Joohyun had no idea where she was going to go.

 

(End)

 

The older woman just remembered crying after. She hates it anytime they fight, and she especially hated the ugly words that left their mouths. They have never talked to each other like that before. However, this is their normal nowadays, and Joohyun really hates it. She hopes Seulgi will be home soon and they can just talk normally. She even got up from the little sleep she had to make breakfast for them. She doesn’t know where Seulgi goes when she leaves their place, but she assumes it’s to her best friend Seungwan. She’s met the girl a few times, and she can see that they have a good and solid friendship. She’s glad that Seulgi has such a good best friend in Seungwan. She can still remember how nervous she was to meet the blonde. She wanted to make a good impression on her girlfriend’s closest friend.

 

(Flashback)

 

They’ve been together for nearly 6 months, and Joohyun couldn’t help but wonder why it is she hasn’t been properly introduced to Seulgi’s best friend. She thought for a moment, maybe Seulgi was embarrassed to bring her older girlfriend around, but the monolid girl assured her that wasn’t why. They were currently laying in bed together, just talking and holding hands when Seulgi fully explained.

 

“It’s not that I’m embarrassed, you’re amazing, Hyun.”

 

“Then why won’t you let me meet this best friend of yours, hm?” She teases playfully.

 

“It’s more that I want you two to get along. Seungwan is my best friend, and you’re my girlfriend. I have no problem with you meeting, we can go to dinner, would that be okay?”

 

“It’s going to be fine, baby. I look forward to meeting your friend.”

 

Joohyun may have sounded confident and sure, but when it came time to meet Seungwan. She felt incredibly anxious, so much so that Seulgi could feel her hand shaking in her own. The taller girl stops just before they really walk over to where Seungwan is waiting.

 

“Hyun, what’s wrong? You’re shaking,” she gently rubs her hands.

 

“I’m sorry. I’m a bit nervous, I want your friend to like me.”

 

Seulgi bends down to kiss her cheek. “Hyunnie, she’s going to like you. Seungwan is really nice, just be yourself. Are you okay?”

 

“I’m good now, thank you, baby. Let’s go.”

 

They then make their way over to where a blonde girl is waiting for them. She certainly does look nice, and she is greeted warmly. Joohyun in return greets her back.

 

“Hi, Seungwan. It’s nice to meet you, Seul has told me a lot about you.”

 

(End)

 

There have been times Joohyun wanted to ask Seungwan to talk to Seulgi. She’s her best friend and would be able to talk to her. Then she always decided against it. The last thing she wanted was to cause any issues within their friendship. She was a grown woman who could handle her own issues. The raven picks up her phone for what feels like the thousandth time. She sent Seulgi a text earlier and she hadn’t responded yet. She is honestly getting worried now. It’s early in the morning now and wherever she is, whether it’s with Seungwan or not. Her girlfriend should be awake by now.

 

The food getting cold isn’t what she’s worried about, as she can always heat it up later. She just wants to hear from Seulgi soon. It’s strange to think of how once upon a time they would talk for hours on end effortlessly. There were times neither one of them wanted to end the call. It was all so cute prompting the other to get off the phone first. It’s a different story now, and a lot has changed in three years. Joohyun sighs and dials her. There used to be butterflies in her stomach each time she called her girlfriend before. Now instead of butterflies she’s filled with anxiety. She wants more than anything for their relationship to work out.

 

“Hello?” Seulgi answers and she sounds tired. The type of tired that would suggest she’s not had a good night's sleep.

 

“Hey, baby,” Joohyun speaks. “Did I wake you?”

 

“No, I’m awake.”

 

There’s a pause of silence for a moment and then Joohyun speaks again.

 

“Do you think you’ll be coming home soon?”

 

Seulgi sighs. “Hyun, I don’t want to fight.”

 

“Neither do I. I just want to know if you’ll be coming home. It was hard for me last night without you, and remembering how we argued wasn’t good either.”

 

“Hyun, I know, and I’m sorry too, and I don’t know how many times I can say I’m sorry.”

 

Joohyun blinks. There is something a bit off in Seulgi’s tone and now she’s wondering if there’s anything else going on.

 

“Seul, I don’t want you to say sorry. I would like to know why you didn’t at least respond to my text. I was worried about you.”

 

“Hyunnie, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you texted me then, and I only saw it later. I don’t want to fight okay, can we please talk about this when I get home?”

 

“You’re coming home then?”

 

“Yes, I’ll come home. I’ll see you later, okay Hyunnie.”

 

They end the call from there and the older woman feels worried. Seulgi sounded so off on the phone. Joohyun knows they will talk again later. She doesn’t want to fight or anything either. At the same time she knows there’s no way she can go into work today and be there. She calls her boss and asks to have the day off. It’s just good she is a normally diligent worker and doesn’t often ask for time off. She can even work some from home today it’s not an issue. Joohyun gets up and puts the food away. It’s her hope they can eat breakfast together. She misses those fun but happy breakfasts they once had.

 

The times where Seulgi would observe her cook, and assist in any way she could. Sometimes with just passing her items out of the refrigerator, and other times Joohyun had been able to show her certain things. Seulgi once couldn’t cook at all, but she can at least do simple dishes now without much of an issue. The raven smiles to herself as she remembers when one time for their first year anniversary. Seulgi did her absolute best to create the same food they had on their first date. It was disastrous and they ended up ordering takeout. Still, at that time Joohyun knew this girl would hold her heart always.

 

It’s why she can’t give up on Seulgi or their relationship. There hasn’t been anyone else that she’s ever been with. Seulgi has told her she feels the same, and that she’s never been with anyone else for as long as she’s been with her. Joohyun also knows that Seulgi loves her. Their entire relationship hasn’t been all bad. There have been some amazing times. Such as when they first told each other they loved one another. The first romantic vacation they had ever gone on, and their first kiss. Joohyun has never felt more in one kiss with someone than she has with Seulgi. She just hopes there will be more kisses still to come.

 

It’s still morning by the time Seulgi does come home. Joohyun goes to greet her at the door and leans forward to kiss her. The brunette backs up some, and tells her she hasn’t had the chance to properly brush her teeth. The raven doesn’t say anything but she finds it odd. It’s not as if they haven’t kissed each other first thing in the morning.

 

“I’ll be back, Hyunnie. I just need to shower and brush my teeth.”

 

“Where did you go after you left?”

 

“I stayed with Seungwan. She normally doesn’t mind if I stay over after we…” the monolid girl pauses. Joohyun can tell she doesn’t want to say they fought again. Although, it’s true that what happened was a fight. Just as it’s usually always a fight.

 

“Hey, baby I’m sorry. I don’t like fighting with you.”

 

“I don’t like fighting with you either. I’m just going to take a shower I’ll be back, and then we can talk.”

 

“Without fighting?” The raven wonders. She watches now Seulgi nods, and then goes to the bathroom for the shower. Joohyun simply heads into the kitchen to reheat the food she made. She must thank Seungwan for being there for Seulgi. The older woman would have been worried sick had Seulgi left with nowhere to go. Then again Seungwan is her best friend, so why wouldn’t she be there for support. When she’s finished with reheating the food and setting up the table. Seulgi returns soon in a fresh dark shirt and jeans.

 

“Hey, are you hungry at all?”

 

“A little, thank you.” Seulgi nods. They sit down in silence. Joohyun is trying to get an idea of what could be going on. Her girlfriend is busy with eyes glued to her plate and not giving her much eye contact.

 

“Seul, is everything okay?”

 

“Hm?” The brunette looks up.

 

“Is everything okay? You just seem a little off.”

 

Seulgi doesn’t say anything for a long moment. Her silence is what continues to worry Joohyun. She reaches over for her hand.

 

“Talk to me. I don’t want us to fight but you can still talk to me, baby.”

 

The raven sees how she flinches and looks away. Joohyun simply squeezes her hand. She doesn't want for Seulgi to feel like she can no longer talk to her.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

“No,” Seulgi shakes her head. She looks like she’ll start crying. The older woman goes over to her and still holds her hands.

 

“Hey, don’t cry. What’s wrong?”

 

“It’s…”

 

“Yes, talk to me. Whatever it is we can get through it.”

 

“Hyun…” Seulgi sighs and wipes away at her tears that are coming down. Joohyun also reaches over to wipe away at them.

 

“Hey, we’re going to be fine, Seul. All couples hit rough patches. It’s just taking us a little while longer to get through but we will.”

 

Seulgi shakes her head. She doesn’t know how she can tell Joohyun what happened. It wasn’t like she wanted to hurt anyone, but now someone will be hurt. Perhaps multiple people even.

 

“I’m sorry,” the brunette whispers.

 

“Sorry about what? Come on, you’ll have to say more than that. Whatever it is, it can’t be that bad?” Joohyun smiles uneasily as she gently pushes her brown locks away from her face.

 

“I didn’t mean to. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

 

“What didn’t you mean to do?” There are now terrible scenarios running through Joohyun’s mind. The top of the list starting with Seulgi actually having cheated on her, and Joohyun thinks she might be right because her girlfriend looks highly upset.

 

“I kissed her.”

 

The raven slowly lets go of her hand. Her blood feels as if it’s going cold. She might have been worried about the women who have shown interest in Seulgi, but she has never thought Seulgi would do this.

 

“Who was it?”

 

“Hyunnie,” Seulgi touches her or rather she tries to.

 

“Who did you kiss!”

 

“It was Seungwan.”

 

“Seungwan?” Joohyun repeats in shock. She can’t believe of all people that Seulgi could have decided to kiss why her? Joohyun wouldn’t have thought they would do this. Seungwan is supposed to be her best friend. Why is she kissing her girlfriend, and more importantly why is Seulgi kissing her too.

 

“I’m sorry, Hyunnie. Please don’t be upset with her. This was my fault.”

 

Joohyun looks down at her with disbelief. She is so angry at this moment, but there are no words that want to come. On top of that anger she is also hurt. This is such a betrayal from someone she loves and a person she thought she could trust around her girlfriend.

 

“Did you sleep with her? Is that why you were in such a rush to take a shower?”

 

“No!” Seulgi denies. “I didn’t sleep with her. We didn’t have , I’m so sorry.”

 

“I can’t believe it’s her that I had to worry about this whole time. Does she like you, or do you like her?”

 

Seulgi tries again to touch her. Joohyun avoids her touch. She can’t even think of touching Seulgi now, not after knowing she’s kissed someone else. Perhaps, if this had been anyone else Joohyun wouldn’t be so hurt. She is disappointed now, but it hurts more since Seungwan is supposed to be her best friend.

 

“Hyun, what happened wasn’t her fault. Just blame me.”

 

“Why are you taking all the blame? She kissed you back didn’t she?”

 

“Yes, but I kissed her first and…” Joohyun pushes her away then. She doesn’t mean to push her with such a force. The shock of it all is wearing off and now she’s just feeling the angers hurt, and disappointment.

 

“Why the hell are you kissing her? Do you want to be with her?”

 

“Hyun, wait, please listen to me. I know you’re angry…”

 

“You swore to me that you wouldn’t cheat on me. It’s just your best friend you want.”

 

“Hyun, baby. I…”

 

“Don’t…” Joohyun turns away from her. “I don’t want to talk to you right now.”

 

“Hyunnie, I’m sorry…”

 

“I said don’t, Seulgi. Leave me alone. I can’t even look at you right this second.”

 

She doesn’t even give her a chance to say more. The raven simply walks away and towards their bedroom. The next thing Seulgi knows the door is being slammed. Joohyun locks the door behind her and simply goes to the bed and finally releases her true emotions. She cries then hard and loud enough that it can be heard on the other side of the door. She knew they weren’t in the best of places. The older woman just didn’t think it was this bad to where Seulgi would kiss someone else.

 

“Hyun, please talk to me?” The brunette knocks on the door. Joohyun looks up from where she’s laying on their bed. At this point she doesn’t want to see Seulgi. She needs the time to be alone and process everything.

 

“Go away, Seulgi.”

 

“Please let me talk to you. I’m so sorry, Hyunnie. I never meant for any of this. I was just surprised when she told me she loves me.”

 

“Seungwan loves her?” Joohyun thinks to herself. How could she not have seen it before? Shouldn’t something like that have been obvious. It doesn’t even matter now. What matters is her girlfriend has kissed someone else while they’re still together. Just because at this point they’re fighting more. That doesn’t make it okay for Seulgi to kiss her best friend.

 

“Seulgi,” she says as strongly as she can through her tears. “Please go away. I don’t want to talk to you.”

 

She doesn’t hear anything for awhile. Joohyun thinks Seulgi has finally left to give her space. She curls up into a fetal position and cries into the sheets. Her heart hurts and she doesn’t know if it will be okay. She knows she does love Seulgi so much still, despite the hurt she is currently feeling.

 

“Seul, why…” the raven whispers, as she wipes away at some of her tears. Right now she doesn’t want to talk to her girlfriend, if she can even still call her as such. That doesn’t mean she can’t try to focus on the good things still. She thinks of when they were first intimate and how they both expressed how they felt.

 

(Flashback)

 

Joohyun found herself looking at the brunette whom she’s just finished sharing such a special and intimate moment with Seulgi. She reaches over to push some of her brown locks out of her face. Just a little while ago Seulgi had been so shy, and adorable when they made love to each other. After she was more comfortable. Joohyun saw the monolid girl really express that love and desire she had for her too.

 

“Hey, how are you feeling?” Joohyun wonders as she kisses her forehead. Seulgi nods and smiles with semi-lidded eyes.

 

“I’m good, Hyunnie. That was really nice.” She gives her hand a squeeze and Joohyun kisses her hand.

 

“Are you sure? I know you did you were ready to be with me, and I loved being able to show you how I feel for you.”

 

Seulgi leans into her and fully kisses her lips. She was so ready to be with Joohyun today, and didn’t regret anything they just shared.

 

“Bae Joohyun, I love you and I wanted to be with you tonight.”

 

The raven looks surprised after Seulgi confesses to her that she is in love with her. The older woman is in love too, but was worried if she told her that it might possibly scare Seulgi away, and the last thing she wants to do is scare the girl she’s in love with away.

 

“You love me?”

 

“Yes,” Seulgi smiles with eyes forming crescents. “Why are you surprised?” She hugs the shorter woman, and Joohyun leans up to kiss her fully on the lips.

 

“I love you too, Kang Seulgi. I love you so much.”

 

“Wait, you do?”

 

The raven laughs at how shocked Seulgi sounds now. Joohyun leans her forehead onto the taller girl’s.

 

“I do. I am so in love with you, and I’m happy to be yours.”

 

“Me too, Hyunnie.”

 

(End)

 

She needs to focus on all those good memories. Joohyun is trying her best to remember all their amazing, loving moments. They just have to be okay after this. The raven is so upset that all she does is cry herself to sleep. Perhaps she will feel okay enough to talk after a nap. Her dreams however are plagued with nightmarish thoughts. She dreams of Seulgi telling her she’s done and is tired of fighting for their relationship.

 

Joohyun finds herself at their place waiting for Seulgi to come home. She hopes they can finally start to work this out, and be happy together. Joohyun doesn’t want to be with anyone else, and she knows Seulgi loves her too. The door opens and there’s the monolid girl she loves.

 

“Babe, hi. Welcome home,” Joohyun smiles and hurries to hug her. Seulgi is stiff in her arms though, and that makes the shorter woman pause. It’s not like Seulgi to be this stiff in her embrace. Seulgi loves her hugs.

 

“Baby…”

 

“Hyunnie, we need to talk.”

 

“Talk about what?”

 

“Us, I think it’s time we ended this.”

 

“What?” Joohyun thinks. Where is this coming from? The raven didn’t think Seulgi was coming home to break up with her.

 

“We need to. You’re not happy and neither am I. Seungwan is who’s best suited for me.”

 

“No.” The raven shakes her head. She refuses to believe that. If Seulgi has made a mistake and she’s sorry for that. Joohyun is sure they can fully talk it through and work this all out. She still loves her and it’s not like Seulgi had with her. Had it been anything worse than a kiss, Joohyun doesn’t think she would deal well with it.

 

“It’s time to let go, okay.”

 

“I don’t want to let you go. I know we still love each other, Seul.”

 

“You need to move on now.”

 

She watches as the taller girl starts to walk away, and all she can do is scream at her to not give up on them.

 

“No!”

 

Joohyun wakes with a sudden jolt. She’s back in the real world and no longer in the nightmare. Is it too much to hope for that it was all a dream. When she sees that the bedroom door is locked she realizes it was no dream earlier. Her girlfriend came home to tell her she had kissed her best friend. Joohyun sighs and leaves the bedroom. The rest of the apartment is quiet and the lights are off. There doesn’t seem to be any sign of Seulgi anywhere. The raven makes herself a cup of tea and sits at their kitchen table.

 

The scary thing about now is the unknown. She doesn’t know what to expect now. Seulgi can come home again and they can talk. She can decide she wants Seungwan after all, and what about them? Joohyun wants to get through this together. All she wants is to be with Seulgi and continue working on their relationship. It’s not to say she doesn’t need time to get over the kiss. She does need the time to properly get over this incident, and for that to start happening she does need to talk to Seulgi.

 

“Where did you go?” Joohyun wonders to herself. She hoped the monolid girl would have stayed here so they could talk. The older woman believes in them no matter what. When she goes to get rid of her mug and notices there is a note on the refrigerator. She hasn’t noticed it earlier because she wasn’t paying attention. It’s written on the purple stationary she loves. Seulgi will sometimes leave cute notes for her. Things that will say,

 

“Please don’t stay too late at the office.”

 

“Don’t forget to eat your lunch today, Hyunnie.”

 

“I love you, Hyunnie.”

 

The note she leaves isn’t a cute one, but she sees the familiar bunny and bear characters she has drawn to represent them.

 

“Hyun, I’m sorry I hurt you. I never wanted to cause anyone to be hurt. You asked for some space so I will give it to you. Maybe we can talk later when you’re ready. I’m so sorry,

 

Seulgi

 

The older woman closes the note and puts it on the table. Seulgi sounds sincere in her note. It still doesn’t solve anything. Joohyun won’t know where they go from here until Seulgi gets back. What if in the end she does decide to leave her?

 

“Seulgi, what does this even mean? We need to deal with this.”

 

She knows it will hurt terribly to lose someone she loves so very much. She won’t give up without a fight however, but if she and Seulgi must also say goodbye. The raven supposes she will have to learn how to deal with that too.

 

“I just want us to be together, Seulgi. Come back home so we can work everything out.”

 

A/N: okay so part two is done. I’m not saying Joohyun is totally over the kiss by any means but she is willing to work things out and Seulgi POV will be next and that ends the story altogether. It’s important to not be angry with anyone in this fic. They’re all just trying to figure things out and it’s life things happen and in this case no one is to blame 100 percent for their actions thanks for reading