Donghyuck clears his throat, the discomfort growing gradually. His throat has been itching since a week ago, and it hasn’t gotten better despite the amount of water and cough syrup he’s been taking for the past few days. He has gone to the clinic, but the doctor was quite sure it was just a cough caused by dropping temperatures. He was assured that this was supposed to last for just a few days, though, and it has been showing no signs of getting better.

“Have you visited the doctor?” Mark asks worriedly, looking up from the book he’s been reading.

He nods, clearing his throat once more. “I went to the clinic last week.” He explains. Mark knows it’s been bothering him, he knows that, as Donghyuck was usually chirpy and naughty self, but is instead constantly coughing and is always drained of energy. “What did the doctor say?”

“It’s just a cough.” He assures him, leaning forward and extending his arms to soothe the worry lines across Mark’s forehead. “Stop doing that.” He whispers playfully.

“I’m allowed to worry, right?” Donghyuck smiles, and nods, trying to mask the disappointment in his face. Because of a drunken confession a year ago, he’s pretty sure Mark knows how he feels—Mark has ignored it, and pretended nothing happened, maybe mainly from the assumption that Donghyuck would forget it because he’s drunk. He knows it isn’t returned—he does. But it doesn’t stop him from feeling disappointed about the fact that he wouldn’t even acknowledge it. Mark then continued to treating him like this, to treating him like he actually matters, to making him feel like there actually is something there—and it just tears him up the whole time. “I’m your best friend, I’m at least allowed that.”

“Of course—I,” he was about to say something more but he was interrupted by another coughing fit.

Donghyuck is trying to focus on studying for their upcoming exams, he really is, but the constant dry coughing has put a strain on his throat and a constant throbbing inside his head. “Are you sure you’re okay?” Mark walks to stand behind him, his hands draping over Donghyuck’s shoulders to soothe his chest with both of his hands, and rests his chin on the top of his head. “I think you should get checked again.” Jeno looks over worriedly, glancing between he and Mark alternately. “I can come with you if you want.”

“I should come with Hyuk!” Jeno slips, almost rushed. “It’s okay if you don’t come, I know you’re getting ready for the basketball match.”

“Jaemin and I can come with him.” Jaemin looks up at the mention of his name.

“Hey but—I also have a bas—”

Jeno fake coughs, touching his forehead with his hand. “I think I may be coming down with a fever, I think I should get checked, too, and I think you should come with us.” He glares at Jaemin quite obviously, but the innocent, naïve, Mark, didn’t suspect a thing.

“Okay.” Jaemin gives up, glancing curiously at the two.

“Take care of him.” Mark clasps Donghyuck’s chin, rubbing his thumb across it. “And give me updates.”

“Sure.” Jeno smiles as Mark walks away from them, letting Donghyuck go.

As soon as he was out of earshot, Donghyuck faces Jeno curiously. “What was that?”

Jeno sighs, unsure of whether to continue or not. “I have…” he glances quietly at Jaemin. “Suspicions, of what that might be—and you wouldn’t want Mark to come with you, trust me.” He quietens his voice significantly, careful not to announce it to Jaemin, who has been wearing his earphones.

“I’m pretty sure I’m thinking what you’re thinking, there’s no need to keep this under wraps.” Jaemin mutters. He straightens up and removes his earphones, setting them aside to face Hyuk seriously. “And I’m pretty sure it’s come to mind, too, so don’t play dumb.” He smiles kindly, doing away with his usual playful demeanor. “You know what it probably is.”

Hanahaki.

“It’s not. It’s just cough, I’m sure. I have only been coughing for weeks now, there aren’t any…” he looks around the library cautiously, making sure nobody is eavesdropping. It was already almost closing time and the library is practically empty but you need to be sure. “Petals.” He whispers. Hanahaki wasn’t exactly rare, but it wasn’t common either. As soon as people knew you had it, the interest spikes and they ask you all types of questions—even including questions about who’s causing it. He glances over to where Mark is standing, stacking books back to where they got them from.

uality has never been something that he and Mark had discussed before, and he hasn’t seriously evaluated if his feelings were only for his best friend, or if it was exclusively for males. He is quite sure Mark is straight, though. The other hadn’t exactly specified it but he knows. Mark is fond of him, he does treat Donghyuck specially—but that’s only because they’ve been best friends for God knows how long.

He waves goodbye to Jaemin and Jeno as he turns the other way to walk home, he turns towards the direction of the bus station until he notices Mark has followed him. He stops and looks over to him curiously. Mark stops, brandishing a conscious expression. “What.” He demanded.

“Why are you following me, you go the other way.” He shoos him away, motioning him away with his hand.

Mark stood his ground, smirking. “No.” he walks quickly and ahead of Donghyuck, insisting. He follows him quietly, smiling in spite of himself. “But you live on the other side of town.” He catches up, linking their arms together. “I can just stay with you, right? Your parents never mind.” Mark pulls him closer, smiling gently. Despite the fact that it was already springtime, much of the winter air still lingers at night, and they had to walk like that the entire distance to the bus station.

These were the moments where Donghyuck starts wishing—looking at Mark and smiling at him like that, laughing and cooing at his antics—then he starts wishing that there might be a chance that there is something there that could bloom into something else.

Mark wraps his arm around his shoulders, rubbing his arm to keep him warm. “We should have brought a jacket, huh.”

“I was wishing it would get warmer.” He mutters, teeth clattering.

“Well, the bus is warm, let’s go.” He straightens up as soon as the vehicle starts to pull over.

Because of the time, there weren’t many people in the bus and they were the only ones sitting at the back. Mark leans back onto the chair, and stretches forward, before wrapping his arms around Donghyuck’s arm. “I have clothes in your room, right.”

He looks at him incredulously, “When did you ever have no clothes in my house?”

Mark suppresses a smile and leans sideways to rest his head on his shoulder, closing his eyes and started to drift off to sleep. He’s sure he would have fallen asleep if he hadn’t started coughing again. Mark looks up at him worriedly, rubbing his hand across his back. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Donghyuck pushes him away gently, feeling a stronger urge to cough is brains out with the proximity—feeling suffocated with the presence of another person while he coughs. “I’m sorry,” he apologizes. “I’m visiting the doctor soon, I’ll be fine.”

As soon as the coughing subsides, Mark goes back to rest his head on his shoulder while he continues to rub circles against his back. “I’m uncomfortable.” Mark mutters quietly.

“Then sit properly.” Donghyuck chastises.

“No,” he smiles. “What I meant is that I’m uncomfortable seeing you sick.” His expression turns into a frown as he takes Donghyuck’s hand in his free one, and caresses it with his thumb. “Feel better, okay?”

“Hmm…” he mutter.

“For me?”

“Okay… for you.”

He sprints out of his bed in the strongest coughing fit he has experienced before, trying to expel whatever it was that was blocking his throat, and as result, his airway. He runs to the bathroom and leans over the sink, trying to spit it out but it refuses to be dislodged. He leans over further, leaning against the wall in front of him. Then it came out—he should have expected it, it’s not like he hasn’t been thinking about it as soon as Jaemin told him their suspicions, he should have anticipated this more: a single white petal dislodges from his throat, completely dry, and floats gently to the sink in front of him.

His heart sank, fearing the time where he could no longer stop them from being revealed and having to put Mark in such an awkward position. He fishes his phone out quietly, opening his, Jeno, and Jaemin’s group chat to tell them.

There’s no need to go to the doctor. I have it.

He suddenly hears movement from his room, footsteps coming near the bathroom. He quickly picks up the fallen petal and clasps it between his fingers right before the door swung open to reveal a groggy, but worried Mark.

“Hey, are you okay?”

He nods, attempting to naturally put his fist down to hide the petal he has hidden between his fingers. “I’m going to the doctor today so don’t worry.”

Mark nods, yawning, before pulling him close into a hug. “Good.” He kisses the top of his head before muttering that he had to take a bath and prepare for the all-day practice, pushing Donghyuck out of the bathroom.

Mark prepares quietly, wearing his basketball uniform and packing his things neatly onto his bag. “Did your Mom look for you?” Donghyuck inquires.

“We were still in the library when I told her I was going to sleep at your place.” He smiles sheepishly. They were neighbors back when Mark and his family moved into a small apartment from Canada, when they were still looking for a decent home for a family of four, and they’ve been friends since then, visiting the playground together and going to school together. After a few months, however, Mark and his family found a home in a different part of the city, but he insisted he wanted to go to school with Donghyuck, despite the travel time that it required him to take. Mark stays with him almost every week, and one day, he just brought a bunch of clothes, toiletries, and underwear and kept them there.

“I’m gonna go,” he strides over, cupping Donghyuck’s face in his hand. “Go to the doctor and tell me what happens, okay?”

“Sure.” Mark walks away and runs down the stairs after bidding good bye to his parents.

“Why is he like this,” he groans, frustrated. “Why does he have to act like that, I’m dying out here.” He complains to Jeno, who has been sitting beside him in a hospital waiting room after insisting that they visit a doctor, anyway. “He’s so sweet, and caring, and touchy, and clingy. He treats me like a lover but I’m his best friend why is he like this?”

Jeno considers for a while. “Maybe he’s in love with you.”

Donghyuck looks at him pointedly, opening his palm to reveal a single petal. “Then what is this?” he scoffs, but not unkindly—more of a sign of resignation and hopelessness in his part. “This is Hanahaki, Jeno. It’s either I die, or I get surgery to get this removed.”

“Or he could fall in love with you.”

“That’s not going to happen.” He knows it isn’t. Mark has had his whole life knowing him, but he never did. Why now? Just because he has Hanahaki, would that magically make Mark fall in love with him? If anything, it will only get him pity, or force Mark into saying things, and wanting to feel things that he doesn’t have to, and… he’d rather get a whole tree removed from body rather than force Mark into something he can’t do.

“Cough,” the doctor tells him quietly as he presses a stethoscope against his’s back, so he did. “Do it again.” He says, prompting Donghyuck to do it again. After taking notes in a small piece of paper in his hand, the doctor steps back and takes out a tool which Donghyuck had no idea what was for. “Did you bring any petals or leaves?” the doctor asked, prompting him to hand the petal over to him.

“Where are the other petals?”

Donghyuck raised his brows in curiosity. “There’s only been one petal so far.” It was the doctor’s turn to be surprised. “Just this one?” Donghyuck nods, sharing glances with Jeno who was equally as confused.

“How long have you been coughing?” he peers over his glasses. “Be honest.”

“A month.” He takes a peek at Jeno, who honestly looked so offended about the fact that he has been experiencing the symptoms for quite a while and hadn’t told him until it became apparent around two weeks ago.

“I don’t want to mean anything by this because I still need to run some tests and do some research about this but your Hanahaki is progressing very slowly. Usually, after one month after the coughing starts they’d be coughing whole flowers rather than just petals.” He slides the petal under the tool and peeks at it multiple times before giving it back to him. “It’s the petal of a daisy,” he says, “It means innocence and purity.”

“Does it matter?”

“Sometimes it does.” He takes out a small paper and starts scribbling information in it. “I will advise you to try and decipher whether the proximity between you and the object of your affection make the coughing more painful, less painful, any exclusive reactions, record them, and report them to me by the next appointment. I will give you medicine to minimize the throat friction, and some Hanahaki exclusive painkillers.” He tears the paper off and hands them to him. “Tell me if the petals change color, what color, approximate amount of them, when leaves start coming out and record what was happening or what happened when they come out, okay?”

After clarifying everything with the doctor, Donghyuck and Jeno starts to get ready to leave, but before they could leave, a nurse knocked and peeked in. “Hi, Doc. There’s someone looking for the Hanahaki patient?” the doctor looks over to him as the nurse opens the door wide.

And there stood, rigid and dumfounded: Mark.

-

inspired by Mark singing Ed Sheeran's 'Hearts Don't Break Around Here'

here's a link if you haven't seen it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwW-g6WMNMI